A/N: COWARDS!!! I give you...the STOMACH FLU!!!

Disclaimer: Not mine!

"All right," Tseng said with a nod of his head. "Reno, you and Rude will escort the president to his luncheon and Elena, you and I will complete the paperwork from yesterday's mission."

"Riight," Reno said with a grin, rolling his eyes. "Paaperwoork."

"You know, that's annoying when you extend the vowels like that," Elena grumbled, holding her bottle of water to her clammy forehead. "You're such an idiot."

"And what is this paperwork going to say?" Reno continued to tease. "'Time 15:00...Elena removes clothes; Time 15:05...Tseng inserts male genitilia inside Elena; Time 15:05 and 15 seconds; Mission Complete!"

Rude choked on the drink of water he was taking, removing his handkerchief to wipe his mouth and nose, all the while glaring at his partner. "Reno..." he said in warning.

"What?" Reno asked defensively. "'Laney knows I'm joking."

"You made her cry," Rude said softly.

Reno looked over to Elena and sure enough, tears were streaming from her eyes. Tseng glared at him. "Apologize," he ordered. "Now."

"Ah Shiva," Reno said, going down on his knees in front of her, real remorse in his voice. "'Laney, seriously," he said. "I didn't mean to make you cry, Babe! You know I'm a jackass..."

Elena turned green. "Reno, shut up," she whispered, her head hitting the conference table. "I don't feel so good."

Reno touched her forehead. "Shit!" he exclaimed. "She's burning up."

Tseng and Rude were at her side in the next second. "Elena?" Tseng asked, pulling her face up to look at him. He leaned foreward and placed his lips to her brow, testing the heat. "We need to get her down to the Medical Facility."

"Come on, Girl," Reno said, pulling her to her feet. Elena pitched foreward and grasped onto the lapels of his rumpled jacket, trying to keep herself from falling. She was swallowing convulsively, her mouth watering incessantly.

"Reno..." she tried to warn, but he wouldn't move. Her stomach heaved just then and everything she had eaten within the last 14 hours made an encore on the front of Reno's uniform.

"The fuck!" Reno said, casting an angry glare at Tseng. "Morning sickness?! You knock her up already?!"

"Don't be absurd!" Tseng growled, sweeping Elena up into his arms. "It takes longer than 24 hours to manifest into morning sickness."

Reno sneered at him. "Gotcha."

Tseng narrowed his eyes. "Bastard."

"Stomach flu," the nurse said, giving Elena a box of juice and patting her shoulder. "Be sure to get plenty of rest and lots of fluids. You're right hip will be sore for a while because of the shot we gave you, but you should be feeling better in a few days."

"Thank you," Elena said as she drank her juice. The nurse left and her three co-workers came in.

Reno sat on the doctor's stool and spun around until he about fell onto the floor. "So?" he asked. "You pregnant?"

Elena chucked the empty juice box at him. "No, you asshole," she said weakly. "Stomach flu. You all need to get shots or else you'll end up with it too."

"Especially Tseng since you guys got up close and personal yesterday," Reno snickered.

"Especially you since you're still covered head to toe in my puke, you toilet," she retorted.

Reno looked down at himself and grimaced. "Riight," he said standing to go and laughing at her glare. He stood in front of Tseng. "Yo, Bossman...you okay?"

Tseng's normally pale face paled even further and his stomach relieved itself onto Reno as well.

"You know...there is a FUCKIN' trash can right there!" Reno snarled. "What is it with you people and puking on me?!"

Rude snickered as he followed his fuming partner out of the examination room to find a nurse to deal with Tseng. This was going to be an interesting few days.

A/N: Reno got puked on!

Reno: The FUCK?! Why the hell did you do that?

Me: I thought it was funny?

Reno: YOU get puked on and then laugh.

Me: SweetCheeks, I have a two year old. I've been peed on, puked on and pooped on. So SHUT UP!

Reno: Shutting.

Now, for the REST OF YOU (glaring at voyeurs) you need to review! Or else I'll send over Reno to give you all a hug...in his twice puked on suit, which is still in his closet, like Monica Lewinsky's blue dress.

Reno: Bad visual. Bad hygeine. (shudders)

REVIEW!!!