Hello all! I hope you like this next chapter.

Warnings for this fic:

-Wincest (Sam/Dean) is endgame for this fic.

-There'll be mentions/references/flashbacks of rape.

-There'll be mentions/references/flashbacks/scenes of torture.

If anything mentioned will bother you, please turn back now.

As always, please review to let me know your thoughts.

Chapter Four

"What did Bobby have to say?" Dean asked later that day as Sam joined him back at the table.

"Pamela will be okay… minus her eyes," Sam sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

After the ambulance had whisked Pamela away, Sam had announced that he was taking Dean back to the motel. Dean had been relieved, he had been shaking for a long time. He knew that Sam was worried but what could Sam do? They had been driving through town when Dean saw the diner. He had been surprised when his stomach growled.

Sam looked surprised, but happy, when Dean asked if they could stop in for a bite to eat. But as they were walking up the diner, Bobby called so Sam waved him ahead while he answered the phone.

"I feel bad," Dean said, ripping his napkin into small pieces.

"Me, too. And we don't know jack so the whole thing was moot," Sam said but then stopped talking when the waitress finally stopped by. Dean didn't want a lot, didn't know if he could keep it down. He ordered a piece of pie, craving the comfort of a food he loved. Sam just asked for the same with an amused smile.

"We know something," Dean said and Sam raised his eyebrows. "Its name. Castiel."

"I guess," Sam nodded.

"So, uh," Dean swallowed audibly. "Why are you in town since you didn't… you know."

"The demons I've been tracking," Sam said with a frown. "Remember? I told you and Bobby last night."

"Oh," Dean said and wondered if that meant something. It had to. Right?

The waitress returned and plopped the plates down causing Dean to jump but then the waitress sat down as well causing the brothers to glance at each other.

"Can we help you?" Sam asked after a moment and the waitress grinned at them in a way that sent shivers down Dean's spine.

"Sam—" Dean tried to warn him when he saw her face flicker.

"You're been looking for us, ain't ya?" The waitress said, her eyes becoming swallowed in black. That only confirmed Dean's fears. He looked over to see the others were demons, too. Fear pounded through his veins and his hands started to shake. Sam was glaring at the demon as if he could destroy the demon with his eyes.

"What do you want?" Dean forced himself to ask, hating how his voice wavered just a bit.

"What do I want," the demon mused. "I want to see you eat your own intestines. I want to see you scream. I want to see you both dead."

"I will end you before you lay a hand on Sam," Dean snapped, suddenly angry. It was one thing to hurt him but another to fuck with his little brother.

"You could try," the demon snorted. "Or I could send you back downstairs."

"Try, bitch," Sam hissed, looking ready to jump her. Dean was able to push the fear down, anger still flowing.

"You won't," Dean said.

"Oh, I won't?"

"No. Because something powerful got me out and none of you know what. This is way above your pay grade," Dean said and saw the worry, the fear, in the demon's eyes. It gave him a rush. He suddenly ached to hold a blade in his hand, ached to put his demon in her place. His hand shook as he gripped the butter knife.

"It's easy," Alastair said, eyeing the soul that was crying and begging to be released with a lustful eye.

"I-I don't know—"

"You want back on the rack?" Alastair asked, sending him an amused look. Dean shook his head, his hands shaking as he picked up the first blade he saw. It was short, only a few inches long but had a sharp edge.

"You know I don't," Dean answered and sent the girl an apologetic glance. He didn't want to hurt her, but after forty years, he couldn't take it anymore! He knew after the first couple of years, he'd eventually crumble and he crumble he did. He feel apart and while it made him feel like the lowest of scum, he had to take the offer.

"Then let's get you started," Alastair said, coming back to his side. He put an arm around Dean's shoulders and led him over to the girl. She began to scream louder, begging for God to help her. Dean couldn't help but snort. God didn't exist. If he did, then he was a real asshole for letting things go so bad on Earth.

"Just take it easy, one little slice and it'll become so easy," Alastair whispered in his ear. Dean swallowed and rested the blade against her squirming stomach. "Do it, Dean."

Dean took a deep breath and looked over, meeting the wet eyes of the girl. He knew what it was like to be in her place. Knew what it was like to have someone not listen to the pleas. Knew what it was like to be ignored. But what he knew most of all was the pain. Never again.

"Never again," Dean said aloud and forced himself to shove the blade down into the woman's soft stomach.

He hated himself for it, but he felt a rush. Excitement curled in his stomach and he jerked the blade to the side, causing the girl to scream louder. He took a deep breath and looked over at Alastair who was grinning at him.

"That's my boy."

Dean took a deep breath, seeing the worried look from Sam and the annoyed from the demon. "You won't send me back to the pit because you can't chance pissing someone important off."

Dean stood, dropping the butter knife, and nodded Sam who sent the bitch another dirty look.

"Let's go Sam," Dean said and walked to the door, hearing Sam follow. The demon at the door stepped aside with a sneer.

When they got to the car, the anger suddenly left him. He started shaking and sweating, beads running down his face. Sam didn't notice, going to the driver side door, unlocking it but as he opened it, he looked over at Dean.

Two different kinds of fear were rushing through Dean. One was the ever present fear of everything that he constantly felt. The other fear was the fear of himself. He had been refusing to let himself think about what he had done to others in the pit and that demon brought it all back. He had wanted to hurt the demon, not even thinking about the innocent person that could be alive inside.

"Dean?"

Dean jumped with a gasp, having not noticed Sam walk up to him. Dean's shaking got a little worse and he could feel his stomach rolling. He didn't get a chance to taste the pie, he thought distantly.

"Damn it," Sam sighed, putting a hand on Dean's shoulder which caused Dean to jump again. "I should go back in there and take that bitch out."

"Can't," Dean croaked out, reaching up to grab Sam's arm, suddenly afraid Sam would try to take them out on his own. He couldn't lose Sam. "Can't take 'em all out alone."

"I…I know," Sam sighed, tightening his grip on Dean's shoulder. Dean finally looked up and met Sam's angry, worried eyes. "You okay?"

Dean hesitated to answer before shaking his head. "No," he choked out, tears filling his eyes. He felt like a chick but he had a sudden ache for physical comfort. He didn't let himself think it over, he just fell into Sam's chest. He heard Sam say his name but he couldn't respond, just shook his head and wrapped his arms around Sam.

Slowly, Sam held him back and then tightened his grip, pulling Dean snug against him. Just then, in that moment, Dean felt good, felt normal. He didn't feel like the Hell bred monster that he was.