4.

"Sleep well." Was all Dillon said to the women, there was no word of love for Kitty, no kiss to lip or cheek, no touch of hand to display affection, and yet for a brief instant their eyes met. It was the silent language that had served them over the many years of their relationship. Never quite enough to convey all that needed to be said, but enough to sustain.

In the dark of their room with the rest of the house asleep, Sarah and Jesse on one bed and Kitty on another the young mother asked, "Your baby died, didn't he Ma'am."

The cloak of night hid her face, but her voice betrayed the lie, "I don't know what you're taking about Sarah."

"When you said you went to Dodge for a second chance ..."

"That's really none of your business." Kitty rolled to her side and clutched the extra bed pillow to her bosom. She wasn't aware of tears in her eyes, but the ache in her heart was enough to take her breath away. She fought for control and when she spoke again it was in a strained whisper, "I guess I was about as low as a person can get. I was broke, just enough money to get me to one more filthy saloon in one more godforsaken cowtown."

The girl's voice was gentle, "Where'd you come from Ma'am?"

"New Orléans by way of San Francisco."

"Always wanted to see San Francisco. Mighty fancy goings on there, New Orléans too, no wonder you're such an elegant lady."

"Guess that's one word for it."

"Why did you ever leave San Francisco?

'You sure have a lot of questions, besides, it's late, we'll be leaving early in the morning."

"But why did you?"

"Well, if you must know, I needed to get away."

"Why?"

Kitty clutched the pillow tighter, finding solace in the embrace even with such a lifeless object. "I needed someplace ... where there were no memories ..."

Sarah let Kitty's words hang in the dark for a moment before saying again, "Your baby died." This time the words were not a question but a statement of fact.

For a long time there was no sound from the other side of the room and Sarah thought maybe Miss Russell had fallen asleep. A coyote howled in the distance, an owl hooted from a nearby tree and the moon passed from behind a cloud bringing night shadows to the room before Kitty replied, "Yes, he died."

"I'm right sorry Miss Kitty."

"No matter ... It was a long time ago. Don't know why I told you now. I haven't talked about it since I left San Francisco. Please, just forget I mentioned it."

"No ma'am I won't forget ... I'll grieve for your little one ... It ain't right that a baby passes and no one grieves."

Long after she heard the quiet sounds of Sarah sleeping, Kitty lay awake thinking. Odd how something buried so deep in your soul that you could forget it existed, had the power to resurface so swiftly and painfully.

She'd been nineteen when she'd first come to San Francisco. Young beautiful and so skilled with cards that she won a job dealing at the Gold Nugget, the most élite gambling house in a town known for fancy women, rich tastes and free-flowing money. She soon became a favorite with the wealthy gents both young and old. One in particular, Leland Huntington found her favor. His family had come to San Francisco in 1850 and settled on what was to be the prestigious Nob Hill area. Leland's father was a banker who made millions during the gold rush without ever lifting a pick axe, his mother was the product of New York aristocracy so even in a new country their money was old. Leland was young and incredibly handsome with jet black hair and the bluest eyes she'd ever seen. She fell in love with him and dreamed of a life together.

Though she disapproved Leland's mother let the relationship go on figuring it would eventually burn itself out. When it didn't Mrs. Huntington arranged a visit with Kitty Russell. She brought with her an entourage which included a humorless bespectacled attorney and her older sister Ethel Willowbrook, who was herself a wealthy dowager of uncompromising opinion. Kitty being young and naïve despite her profession, welcomed them to her room. "I've looked forward to meeting you Ma'am." She said.

Mrs. Huntington wore a heavily draped gown with jewels in her ears and a hat that added nearly a foot to her height. She gave no regard to Kitty's greeting, but spoke in a demanding tone. "You are to stop seeing my son at once. I'll not have his future jeopardized by the likes of a saloon trollop. He will be a great man one day. Why, he could be Governor!"

Mrs. Huntington's sister agreed, "Yes, even President of the United States."

The lawyer stepped forward. "Mrs. Huntington has asked that you consider a business proposition. I have the forms drawn up for your signature. I have been authorized to give you this check for $2,500.00 to leave California and never to return."

"You can't be serious?" Kitty said in disbelief. "I love Leland, we plan to get married someday."

Mrs. Huntington scoffed, "You are nothing more than a dalliance. Not worthy of anything more than satisfying his baser desires. Take the money and leave California. Never contact my son or my family again. It's a generous offer, certainly more than you deserve. Refuse and you will be sorry for I will make certain your life is nothing more than a living hell."

In shock and anger Kitty grabbed the paperwork from the attorney. She waved the documents in front of Mrs. Huntington's face. "How dare you try to buy me off! When Leland finds out about this, you'll be the one who is sorry!" She tore the paper in shreds and threw the remnants at the indignant woman.

Mrs Huntington's face turned to stone, "You have sealed your fate and shall pay the consequences."

By the end of the week Kitty had been fired from the Gold Nugget, having been accused of cheating at cards. She quickly found a job at another saloon but despite the fact business doubled with the attractive redhead she found herself terminated from this position as well. She worked several other gambling parlors and saloons, each more unsavory than the last until finally she found herself working at a filthy saloon near the wharf that was little better than a bordello. She had been feeling unwell for some time following her visit from Mrs. Huntington. After a talk with another saloon girl, it became apparent Kitty was going to have a child. She was scared but excited too for she was sure Mrs. Huntington would change her mind and welcome the mother of her grandchild into the family. Her body was already changing shape, her breasts full her flat stomach uncharacteristically rounded. She wouldn't be able to hide her condition much longer. She began to plan a visit to Nob Hill.

That night as she was mucking out the saloon floor, she happened to spot the local newspaper on a tabletop. It was opened to the society page. The headline read, "Leland Huntington to Marry Railroad Heiress Hortense Hopkins."

The paper fell from her hands to the floor. She felt sick to her stomach and had to rush outside to retch in the street. People passing by regarded her as just another drunken saloon girl and no one came to her aid. When she had recovered she made her way to her small room. She cried herself to sleep. In the morning she thought about the $2,500.00 that had been offered to her. She could take the money and make a second chance for herself and the baby. However, pride had always been a part of Kitty Russell's make up and she'd never been one to admit to a lost cause.

That being the case, she had no alternative but to let Leland know about the child. He should be the one to make the decision not his mother. The newspaper had said there was to be an engagement party to honor the couple in two days. When the time came she dressed in the best gown she had left, a red taffeta that showed both cleavage and the elegant curve of her neck. She draped herself with a cheap black sequined shawl to cover her rounded belly and rented a carriage to take her to the home of Hortense Hopkins. She climbed the stairs to the stately mansion and knocked on the door. A dignified gentleman in butler's garb answered. "I'm here to see Leland Huntington."

He was aware of who the young woman was, servants talked from household to household. He'd been ordered to watch for the girl, should she come to cause trouble. "Your name is not on the guest list. You will leave or I shall summon the constable."

"Please." Kitty said, and he was man enough to be moved by her lovely face and sincere supplication. She held out a note and asked the servant to give it to Leland. "Please tell him I need to talk with him, just for a moment, that's all I ask."

"Very well." The butler agreed, asking her to stand around the corner of the main door so she wouldn't be visible to those passing by on the street. It was cold out and raining. She was left to wait nearly twenty minutes before Leland appeared.

His face held an ugly scowl, which softened only somewhat when he saw once more how pretty she was. In his hand he held the note she'd written. His voice had a hard edge to it. "It's over Kitty. It was fun while it lasted but I have obligations to my family and my father's business. It is important I marry someone of my own social standing. If you hadn't made such a fuss with Mother, we could have resumed our good times once my honeymoon was over. Not now. If you are not out of San Francisco by the end of the week I shall be forced to have you thrown into jail. Don't doubt that I can Kitty, as quickly as a snap of my fingers."

"I'm going to have a child." She blurted out

He laughed then and it was a cruel sound. "What do you want me to do about it? Surely you aren't claiming your bastard child is mine? Why everyone knows what kind of woman you are. It's all over town how you cheat at cards, steal from your customers and your employers."

"That's a lie, you know it is. As for the baby, it is your child, there has been no one else."

"What kind of fool do you take me for? You work in a brothel."

She moved closer to him, "Please, you said you loved me ... You said ..."

"You are a fool. A man will say anything to get what he wants. Now leave or I'll have you taken away."

"You wouldn't dare." She raised her hand to slap him but he pushed her away and in doing so he sent her tumbling down the brick stairs to the street below.

He brushed his hands as if they'd been made dirty by the contact. "It is your own bastard child, I lay no claim to it." He declared.

She struggled to her feet and screamed at him. " How can you deny your child, what kind of man are you?" And then before she knew what had happened she was being manhandled by two armed men with badges pinned to their chests. "Take her away." Leland Huntington shouted from the top of the stairs. "See to it she is locked up until she is so old and ugly no one will have use for her."

"No!" She screamed, "NO... Let me go ..."

She turned to see Leland watching her being dragged away. The double doors to the mansion opened and a dour faced girl grabbed possessively at Leland's arm. He patted her hand and lead her inside the grand home, without so much as a backward glance.

It was in the San Francisco women's prison that her child was born and died. Three months later she was released from prison. Her friends from the Gold Nugget had scraped together $35.00 in cash and a stage ticket east. She had one threadbare traveling suit to her name and a meager supply of personal items that had been placed in a worn out carpet bag. She was thin and sick and very much alone when she boarded the stagecoach east.

If she had learned one thing from her last encounter with Leland Huntington it was to not look back. She vowed never to let what happened in San Francisco happen to her again. There would remain over her heart a protective shell, impenetrable to such a shoddy emotion as love. The tiny child left behind was buried deeper in her soul than in the prison graveyard.