Hermione's Mistake Chapter 4
Chapter 4
(6 Months later)
"Do you Hermione Granger take Ronald Weasley to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
"Yes."
"Do you Ronald Weasley take Hermione Granger to be your lawfully wedded wife?"
"I sure do."
"By the power vested in me I now pronounce you man and wife."
The celebrant shook hands with both of us and then announced that Ron could kiss his wife. He eagerly dipped me down low and kissed me awkwardly on my lips and then pulled me up quickly so that I almost lost my balance.
There were cheers, well Jenny cheered as she was the only witness. Harry was meant to come and as sad as Ron was that he had been on a mission, I was secretly happy as well as sneaky. Since it was me who conveniently forgot to give Harry the date of our impending nuptials and with Ron's timetable so full, he didn't have time to check.
The Weasley's were not happy with the surprise wedding, Molly Weasley felt robbed of planning the perfect wedding and Ginny didn't really believe we were even married but as magical weddings were so intense, there was no lying about that. Harry just apologised over and over again blaming his new secretary for losing the invite. Ginny glared at me constantly and I wondered why, shouldn't she be happy I was finally 'taken'.
I know it seems strange but we didn't really see the Weasley's much at all after that. I knew Harry and Ginny had gotten their own place in London and went every Tuesday night for dinner so I planned to always have overtime on Tuesdays so we went on the odd Monday but only when Ron was home. It suited me as I could finally live in my own little world. I thought about the spell from time to time but as I hardly saw Harry I never needed to do a top up. It even got to the stage where I would take off my pendant for short periods of time. It slowly crept into the recesses of my mind and I was happy to leave it there.
It was not a happy marriage by any stretch of the imagination. I turned a blind eye to Ron's romps when on tour and he happily let me live peacefully. Ron settled after a year and then started on wanting a family. After two years of trying to fall pregnant, the stress finally had its toll and Ron and I separated. I had no love for him and honestly I don't believe he did either. I couldn't tell him that I always made sure I used the strongest contraceptive spell I knew so as to not fall pregnant.
I just couldn't do that to a child. I couldn't bring them into a world where I lived a lie every day of my life. That wasn't fair to the three of us really.
Funny as it was, Jenny and Ron hit it off and in all honesty I gave them my blessing, why should they be miserable just because I condemned my own life to misery? I was happy for them and when Jenny fell pregnant with twins six months after they started dating Ron couldn't of been more happier so I filed for a divorce and Ron signed it immediately. The divorce was very amicable.
1 year after the divorce.
I came home from work after having a particularly hard day, I was now a trainer and I had twelve new students under me. I found a decorative envelope floating near my front door, I reached for it and turned it over in my hand and was shocked to see it was a wedding invitation. I was cordially invited to the wedding of Ginerva Weasley and Harry James Potter in four weeks time. Even though I knew it was coming it still pained me beyond belief bringing back a flood of memories.
I then got angry...I had no right to cry or feel sorry for myself, I did this, I made my own fate and I had to live it. I summoned my owl and told her I had two envelopes to deliver. I immediately sent the RSVP back saying I had to decline due to work commitments and then sent another to a travel agent and booked a trip to Greece for the time of their wedding.
(Present day)
Unfortunately Greece was going to have to wait, work was becoming hectic as a particularly nasty virus went through the hospital staff and we were all doing double shifts. Jenny was still off on maternity leave and my department was crazy. After working 4 days straight doing 18 hour shifts a day, I dragged myself home and collapsed on the lounge.
The next thing I knew I was being woken by a loud insistent pounding on my front door. I staggered to my feet trying to get my bearings as the exhaustion in my body was still evident. I blinked a few times while rubbing my eyes and made it to the door, if that damn knocking would just stop...
I reefed it open and stood in complete shock. At first I thought I must have been dreaming as there was no way the person I was looking at could have been standing there.
He stood tall and stiff, a sign he was really annoyed, I still knew him so well.
"Harry... what are you doing here?" He pushed past me and then slammed my door shut. He leant into my face and then used his finger to press into my chest quite firmly.
"You have some questions to answer Hermione and I'm not leaving till I get them!" I stepped back at the intensity and fury of his voice.
He walked over to the lounge room and picked up my throw blanket I had been using on minutes before and he threw it onto another chair. He sat down on the edge of the lounge showing no comfort or ease. He was tense and his left leg was bouncing.
"Umm do you want something to drink?" I asked feebly.
Harry looked at me with nothing short of a death glare and I couldn't hold his intense look. I looked down at my hands realising I was again holding the pendant which hung around my neck and I quickly let go hoping my slip up wouldn't give away my secret. The silence seemed to drag on and I was becoming more nervous as time passed, I decided to push the issue.
"Ok Harry what brings you here at this late hour, aren't you getting married tomorrow?" Harry looked at me and then when I thought he wasn't going to say anything he started.
"I have a problem..."
"Ok what is it?" I asked actually not really wanting an answer.
"uhhh, what is it you ask... that is so rich coming from you." again Harry fell into an uncomfortable silence which was creating a dreaded feel in the room. I stood up and walked to the kitchen making two cups of coffee and returning with a few biscuits and placed them in front of Harry. I took mine and sat down as far away as possible from him and then waited.
"Six months ago I started working at Hogwarts as the Defence against the Dark Arts Professor and as a job requirement, we are required to run scans on ourself..." Harry looked at me waiting for my reaction but I just nodded telling him to continue.
"... yeah the scans are protocol and do you by any chance know what the scans check Hermione?" I shook my head not making eye contact.
"It checks to see if I have had any polyjuice potion, that was clear, it also checks to see if I am using any spells to enhance my students or myself... that was clear too but the last one wasn't clear Hermione, the last one checks to see if we have had any memory modifications. Can you tell me why I would have had memory modifications Hermione?" His voice showed the anger that his face was displaying. I decided to play dumb, he still had no idea it was me.
"No I have no idea Harry but considering the atrocities you saw through the war its not completely wrong." Harry nodded but to me it looked like he expected me to say that. I took hold of the vial around my neck one more time thanking Merlin I had disguised it as a pendant.
"Yeah, you would think so hey but you see for years I keep having this reoccurring dream and you are in it, I keep trying to get to you but you are always slipping out of my reach. I started looking into it more and more and imagine how surprised I was when the substitute Healer at Hogwarts found I have gaps in my memory. Big gaps Hermione."
Oh Merlin my world was unravelling and I couldn't stop it.
"What did you do?" I started to cry as all my sins were confronting me at once.
"Harry I'm so sorry." he stood up and knelt in front of me grabbing my shoulders roughly and shaking me as he emphasised his request.
"Tell me what you did? All of it Hermione tell me every detail!" I nodded still crying and tried to compose myself.
"Tell me what you know Harry?" Harry sat back on the floor still in front of me and ran a nervous hand through his hair.
"Hermione it feels like I am missing a huge gap in my life, I remember the war and details but Ron mentioned something a few months ago about when he left us on the search and I couldn't remember that happening at all. I looked at him like he had two heads and even Ginny knew about it. As they told me about the events, as much as they could, it was like a movie where I was the main character but I had no idea of what was happening..." I sat in silence wondering how on earth to tell him.
"... it wasn't the first time either, the time when Ginny and I broke up and I told her I was in love with you and then for some reason I went back to her with no recollection of what happened. At first she didn't care she was just happy I was home."
"Every time we had a fight and I told her I was leaving she would throw your name in and I couldn't understand why which of course would cause even more problems."
"I started to realise that every time I had a missing memory, YOUR name came up Hermione, can you tell me why that is so?"
I felt sick to my stomach and I decided it was finally time to let all of this pain go. I reached up to my necklace and undid the pendant. As I did it morphed back into the small thin glass vial which held his memories, the glass vial that hung around my neck weighing me down for the last four years.
I handed it to him and in between sobs I mumbled sorry.
Harry didn't say anything, he looked completely confused. Maybe he just didn't expect me to hand it over so easily, maybe he hoped I knew nothing. In all honesty this secret that I had carried for so long has destroyed my life and possibly even destroyed Harry's too.
Harry took the vial in his hands and turned it over a few times. He looked at me and questioned why it was blue.
"Its blue because I completely extracted the memories from your mind, you can use your wand to re-enter them, you don't need a pensieve to view the memories and considering they are yours, well you can put them back where they belong." I cried some more while I watched Harry open the vial and then extract the memories one by one and then tap his skull. The memories slid back into place one by one each one drawing a realisation on Harry's face more stronger than the one before.
When he finished the fury was evident on his face.
I tried to apologise over and over again but I knew it was to no avail.
Harry screamed at me and for the life of me I couldn't hear him or remember what he said because the things I was saying to myself, my self hate, completely and absolutely consumed me. The one thing that stuck with me was his departing words,
"You killed me Hermione!"
It took ages to get back to some kind of normal but the weight that was off my shoulders was so apparent. I had to know it was the right thing to do even though it raised more questions, questions that will never be answered. Harry married Ginny the following day as planned but according to the Daily Prophet they divorced a year later, Ginny saying there was irreconcilable differences. She was happy though as she got a nice huge payout from being the 'Chosen One's' wife and then later Ginny married Neville Longbottom. Last I heard she had a few kids and was happily married.
I resigned myself to the fact that I will be alone forever and my stupid mistake cost me my best friend and the love of my life. I had a few friends at work and Jenny worked hard to bring me back into their lives. I still kept in contact with Ron and Jenny and was even a Godmother to their last baby, a little boy named Marcus.
Harry was at the Christening but he completely ignored me and in all honesty I deserved it so I didn't push it. I hung around with Jenny's brother, Luke so I didn't look like a complete loser and when Harry made his apologies and left I felt a sense of relief.
I was turning 30 this year and decided I might make a move to a new country, I still hadn't been to Greece so maybe that would be the first stop. Considering magical folk lived well into their hundreds, I realised I had enough moping, it was time to move on.
I organised my transfer to the Greek equivalent of St Mungo's and they were happy to have me. I had bought a little unit in Voula right on the water. It was a beautiful, peaceful place and I was looking forward to it. I had one last look around my flat and was pleased that a young family were moving in, ready to make some happy memories. Merlin knew this poor little flat needed some happy memories. I shrunk my boxes down and waited the hour till my portkey would activate. I heard a knock on the door and walked over thinking it may have been Jenny coming to say bye again. I opened the door with a smile that slid off as quick as it was placed there,
"Harry!"