Chapter III – Only A Little

"Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough." – Mark Twain

The desert night was always peaceful. Or had been, anyways.

Now, all Erend could feel was the turmoil inside him, a blizzard of happiness, elation, disappointment, and guilt. Aloy had just…appeared out of the night. It felt like a gut punch to the stomach. With a side helping of hammer-smack. She'd been dead, he'd been so sure of it. That terrible sound, that wail from the Nora – it could only have meant that everyone up on the mountaintop had died.

And yet…here she was. Standing right here, next to him. She was alive. Alive.

Or was he just hallucinating? By the forge, he hoped not.

"This is beautiful," she spoke quietly. He followed her gaze, out over Meridian Village, over the Maizelands and to the jungles beyond. To the Spire, twinkling in the moonlight, a tower of a thousand lights. The rivers and canals lazily treading through the fields. It really was beautiful.

"Should see it at the Wintersend Festival," Erend murmured, vision hazy as he looked out." Whole city decorated with little paper lanterns, everything lit up by the bonfires, people playing music, dancing in the streets – it's amazing." He sighed deeply, kneading his forehead with a hand. Ersa's favorite. He didn't realize he'd spoken until he heard her voice again.

"Erend, I…I heard what happened. A little bit, anyways," she breathed quietly. She shuffled closer to him and forge. He wondered if she knew how distracting she was." I know she was special to you."

The Vanguardsman snorted and released his death grip on the post. He shifted, turning his eyes down to the decking.

"Special to me? Ersa was special to everyone," his voice, to his own ears, sounded almost reverent. And he was, honestly; he had always walked in Ersa's shadow. Not by choice – she was just better." She bossed everyone around." He turned away from Aloy." She kept me in line."

He shook his head, one hand going up to his face, and he turned back around. His eyes burned, and he tasted salt." I'm supposed to fill her shoes, now, you know. Damn good job I'm doing of fucking that up."

Aloy blinked. She was…speechless. Come on, think of something, think of something!

"I…I lost someone, too. It was at the Proving. The man that raised me. His name was Rost."

"Aloy…I'm so sorry," Erend trailed off. He wanted to say more, but his alcohol-rotted brain couldn't gather the words. The Nora just shrugged, face turned away. They stood there in silence until Erend opened his mouth to speak, pushing himself off the railing.

The next thing he knew, he was sputtering as water was poured over his face. Erend felt his cheek being slapped lightly, and a light voice whispering at him, a deep sense of panic in the voice.

"Come on, Erend, wake up! Please!" Aloy.

His wrist somehow shot up and grabbed at her wrist, and he felt the water stop. He let go and plunked his hand back down, eyeing the fire-haired girl kneeling next to him." There's better ways to wake me up."

His voice was still slurry. Yep, still drunk.

"I know, I tried them," she replied, gracefully moving her limbs to sit cross legged next to him." Your eyes just…rolled back, and you fell over. Erend, what happened?"

Erend shook his head, and instantly regretted it. It was split with pain, an awful pounding behind his eyes." Prob-prolly…ugh…blacked out. Hap-happens s'times."

He heard Aloy sigh deeply as his eyes closed.

"Does that happen with only a little?"

He gently shook his head in response. He knew damn well he'd overdone it. He always did. But he had an excuse, right? Ersa was his excuse. And, now that he faintly realized it, always was. And Erend just couldn't do that to her. Shouldn't, but he did.

And Ersa deserved better. Deserved so much better.

Grunting, he heaved himself slowly to a sitting position, next to Aloy on the walkway. Erend ripped off one of his gauntlets to scrub a hand over his face. He needed to shave, badly. And he needed to bathe. He sighed, throwing his gauntlet down and hanging his head.

"I know you didn't come here just to listen to my problems. What did you need, Aloy?"

"Well…" she started, slowly. He looked up, and she was picking at some unseen thread on her boot." You…I guess you know that the Proving was attacked?"

Erend just nodded. He could see the flash of fire on his eyelids." We were…we were in the village at the time. I could see the explosion. And when we got down to the village, after your braves had gone up to scout the area…the cry of grief…I've never heard anything like that."

He peered over at Aloy through one of his hands, voice coming out in a quiet whisper." I thought you were dead."

Aloy nodded slowly, folding her hands in her lap." Only five of us survived. I was the only one able to walk when I left."

"H-how'd you d'it?"

"Erend, I don't think you have the brain power to understand that right now." The words were a slap in the face, despite her careful, measured delivery, but she was right. Too right." And I'm…I'm just tired, right now."

Erend snorted when she mentioned his brain power. He didn't much in the first place. But even in his drunken state he understood what she was trying to say.

"We c'ld st-stay at my place…but t'may take a while to…to get there," he offered. The later he stayed up, the more slurred his speech got.

Aloy gave him a guarded look." No…funny business?"

Erend's lips twisted into a droopy smile." No funny business. Just sleeping. Promise."

The Nora regarded him for a minute before she nodded." Yeah. Alright. You, uh, you do need to get up, though."

Erend sighed exaggeratedly." Yeah, I guess you're right." Slowly, he picked himself up off the ground, armor clanking loudly. He wobbled on his feet before he was reasonably certain he'd regained his balance.

He flashed a grin at Aloy before taking a tentative step." Follow meeee!" He watched Aloy bring a hand to cover her face; he could hear a little giggling as he slowly walked. Sure enough, though, she followed him, through the now-empty streets of Meridian.

It took the pair nearly an hour, a few wrong turns, and one too many falls for Erend, but they got back to his home, a stately little place a short distance from Avad's palace.

"Well, here's home." Erend stepped up and clumsily fished around in his pockets before producing the key and unlocking the door. He pushed it open with a drunken flourish, and Aloy followed him inside. It wasn't until he got in the door that Erend's exhaustion caught up to him.

He didn't know the last time he'd slept. Erend had been so preoccupied drowning in beer, ale, and mead that he hadn't paid attention, and his addled brain didn't want to think.

Erend mumbled something to Aloy about taking the bed before falling face-first onto the couch in his small living room.

"Are you really going to sleep there on the couch?"

"You can take the bed," Erend muttered into the pillow. He ripped his gauntlets off and threw them to the ground before he began working on the buckles of his armor. He didn't even want to take it off, he just wanted to let the void take him already, but Erend knew he'd be better off in the morning.

Sighing, he slowly lifted himself out of his chest piece, dropping it on the floor next to him. He kicked off his boots and flopped back on the cushions; forge, he was dead. He still wished he was. As he closed his eyes, he heard Aloy grunt softly, moving something, before he heard a soft humming, a lilting, happy tune.

He waited several minutes before opening one eye. He could vaguely see Aloy's legs, kicked up comfortably, one bouncing lazily in the air, through his sleepy, drunken haze.

"Aloy," he murmured, lifting his head up," you know…you know you don't have to sleep on the floor, right?"

"I'm used to it," she chirped, rolling onto her side, hazel eyes peering up at him. Her hair was out of its usual braids, spilling over her shoulders, and she blew a couple strands out of her face." Besides, I'm…used to sleeping near people. It's a…a Nora thing."

"Suit yourself," he said." Just…figured you'd be more comfortable." He was cramped on the couch, but it was enough. He didn't want to get up. His eyelids slowly drooped closed, Aloy's quiet humming slowly lulling him peacefully to sleep.

Author's Note:

Uh, so yeah. Hey. I'm not dead, believe it or not.

That was a long wait, yes, I know. Blame college. And procrastination. And writer's block. Yeah. All those things.

I've been stewing on this chapter for a while. Sine, uh…July. That's a long time. I didn't really edit this chapter, so it doesn't live up to the others, I'm sure, but I wanted to get something out (I wrote approximately 900 of the 1400-1500 words today) as soon as possible. I'm planning on trying to get out at least one other chapter while I'm on winter break, then it's back to good ol' school. Yay.

Anyways, enjoy, peoples of the internet. Feedback of all kinds is, as always, greatly appreciated.

-Krast