The Death of Spongebob
Chapter Four: Interview with Plankton
The door opened and closed rather rapidly. Inspector Tailfin looked around wildly. "Is someone there?"
A cinematic boinging sound echoed about the office. "Yes. It is I, Plankton!" Onto the desk hopped a miniscule being.
"Sheldon Plankton, what were you doing in the Krusty Krab today?"
The small green creature blinked its single eye and replied in an alarmingly loud voice. "Trying to steal the Krabby Patty formula, of course."
"And does Spongebob have that formula?"
"Yes. I should know. I know quite a bit. I went to college."
Inspector Tailfin narrowed his eyes. "Yes, yes, that's all very interesting. Did you see Spongebob while you attempted this heinous act?"
He shrugged his nearly nonexistent shoulders. "I only saw Mr. Krabs. Until Mr. Krabs went into the kitchen suddenly, and I followed. And there he was."
"How did you feel about this?"
"Oh, we were friends, once, a long time ago..." He sighed wistfully, then his face cleared of emotion. "I felt okay. I don't think about Spongebob much. As long as I get the Krabby Patty formula..."
"What do you plan to do with the Krabby Patty formula if you get it?"
Plankton's face scrunched up in thought. "I... don't know. I think I'll probably use it in my burgers and sell them worldwide and make millions of dollars, with which I will buy custody of several chain restaraunts then take over the world. After that, I haven't planned much."
"Take over the world? At your height?" Inspector Tailfin snorted.
"Hey! Don't make fun of me. When I get my growth spurt..." His voice became even louder, menacing. "I will crush you."
"...Ohhhh-kay." Inspector Tailfin looked down at his notes. "So do you hold a personal grudge against Spongebob in any way?"
"Spongebob? Not really. Unless he gets in the way of my evil."
"...No further questions."
Plankton looked at him, his eye widening. "Do you think I'm the murderer?"
"No." Inspector Tailfin admitted, looking at his clipboard. "But I do think that you might need some therapy. You're kind of... weird."
Plankton's mouth twisted into a frown. "Oh."
Next Time on The Death of Spongebob
"Patrick Star, you are Spongebob's closest friend, yes?"
The starfish's mouth opened wide, revealing several crooked teeth. He spoke in a dull, low voice. "Wow, this question is hard! When do I get my results? Did I win?"
"I just want to know if you're Spongebob's friend."
Patrick uttered a wail. "Who's Spongebob? No, don't tell me! I know this one! Uhhhh... 13! Yes! The answer is 13!"
Inspector Tailfin sighed. "Never mind. Let's talk about something else."