Love at first sight

Disclaimer- I do not own Twilight. All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Chapter 4

BPOV

I decided I might as well go to bed early that night. As usual, I dreamt of Edward. In my dream it was very dark and what dim light there was seemed to be radiating from Edward's skin. I couldn't see his face, just his back as he walked away from me, leaving me in the blackness. No matter how fast I ran, I couldn't catch up to him; no matter how loud I called, he never turned. Troubled, I woke in the middle of the night and couldn't sleep again for what seemed like a very long time. I know my subconscious was trying to tell me something but I just couldn't understand what it was. When I finally fell back to sleep, I had one of my erotic dreams. Edward and I were having a picnic in our meadow.

He placed a chocolate covered strawberry in my mouth. I bit it and he licked the juice from my lips. After I ate the strawberry, he leaned in to kiss me. I felt a thrill go through me as I felt his lips. When he moved to pull back, I deepened the kiss. I opened my mouth and moaned when I felt his tongue on mine. I couldn't remember how to breathe. He placed his hands on my face and gently pushed me away. I gulped in some air. My heart was beating like a hummingbird's wings. Once my heart beat settled to a normal rhythm, I leaned in and started kissing him again. I shifted so I was on my knees in front of him. My fingers were anchored in his hair pulling him closer to me. He wrapped his arms around me, running his fingers up and down my spine; sending shivers through me. He gently lowered himself on his back taking me with him. Soon I was straddling him, devouring his mouth hungrily. I started unbuttoning his shirt. Running my fingers over his exposed chest, placing kisses over each spot my fingers touched. My eyes roamed over him; taking in his beautiful body. I felt his cock hardening under me making me more aroused. I could feel my juices flowing. I wiggled my hips, grinding my pussy into his hard length.

He groaned and flipped me over, pulling my top over my head. He unhooked my bra, tossing it aside. He kneaded my breast, running his thumbs over my hard nipples, sucking one into his mouth. I arched my back, pushing my breast out more. He took his time, licking and sucking both breasts, tweaking my nipples, blowing his cold breath over my sensitive buds, alternating so each could get the same amount of attention. I was writhing under him, moaning. My hands went to his ass pulling him into my aching pussy, trying to create some friction. He moved down my body, nipping, sucking and touching each inch of exposed skin. He undid my jeans and pulled them off and started working his way up my body. He kissed my ankles, massaged my calves, he lifted both knees, placing a wet kiss behind each, his fingers ghosted over my thighs paying special attention to my inner thigh, sucking and kissing my tender flesh. He snaked a finger into my panties, teasing my folds, he dipped his finger in my juices using my wetness as lube to rub my clit. This was exquisite torture. I needed him.

"Please, please," I was begging.

I heard him groan. He ripped my panties off, pushing my legs further apart and putting his mouth on my pussy. My hips jerked off the blanket. I grabbed a handful of hair and pushed his face closer to where I needed him. He licked my pussy like a cat lapping up milk, then he moved to my clit, sucking and flicking it with his tongue. He started thrusting his tongue in and out of my pussy. I felt my muscles tensing. He replaced his tongue with a finger plunging it in me; moving back to sucking my clit. I was jerking my hips and moaning constantly. He slipped in another finger and I lost control. I was fucking those long fingers. A few more hard fast pumps and I felt like I was splitting into a million pieces. I screamed out his name as wave after wave of delicious sensations flooded my body. He pulled his fingers out and sucked them clean. Then he was licking my soaking pussy using the tip of his tongue to get every drop.

"You taste delicious!" He moaned.

I didn't even see him get undressed but before I could come down, I felt him hovering above me. He was on his knees; the head of his cock was at the entrance to my pussy. I wiggled my hips greedy for more. He lifted my legs over his shoulders and rammed into me with one hard thrust, his cock filling me completely. My walls were still contracting from my orgasm. Now it was clenching around his cock. He paused for a moment; both of us savoring the feeling. He started moving slowly, grinding his hips into my swollen clit. He picked up speed, pumping his hips. Soon he was fucking me hard; his cock plunging into me over and over. He leaned over giving me a deep passionate kiss almost bending me in two. This new position had him going deeper. He continued pumping that hard cock deeper and deeper bringing me unbelievable pleasure. His mouth was on my breast again.

A shudder went through my body. My nails were digging into his back. The feel of his mouth on my breast, the way his cock filled me up, the feel of his hips pounding into me or grinding into my clit. All of this combined, to drive me wild. I couldn't hold back any longer. I let the sensations take ahold of me and I was racing towards another mind blowing climax. I let out a scream just as I felt my pussy tightening, squeezing his cock even more. He moaned as my muscles milked his cock. He kept pumping until the last of his cum was deep inside me. We were both panting, gasping for breath. Edward rolled to his side, wrapped the blanket around me and cuddled me to his chest. "So much for your picnic." He chuckled.

I woke up more confused than when I went to bed.

Before our conversation, I was convinced that Edward regretted pulling me from the path of Tyler's van. There was no other conclusion I could come to. He denied that. In fact he was adamant that was not the reason for not moving on with our relationship. I wanted very much to talk to him. Yesterday we'd both been so furious. I was still angry that he wouldn't trust me with the truth, even though I was keeping my part of the bargain flawlessly. But he had in fact saved my life, no matter how he'd done it. And, overnight, the heat of my anger faded into awed gratitude. What was he hiding? Was his secret so bad that he felt he needed to sacrifice what we had? Unless he's a really good actor, I know he was attracted to me. Did he regret being intimate with me? I was consumed by the mystery Edward presented and more than a little obsessed by Edward himself. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

After that disastrous conversation, my life fell into a routine. I was assimilated into Mike's and Jessica's group of friends. Tyler Crowley was impossible, following me around, obsessed with making amends to me somehow. He even started sitting at our now-crowded lunch table. Mike and Eric were even less friendly toward him than they were to each other, which made me worry that I'd gained another unwelcome fan.

The Cullens and the Hales sat at the same table as always, not eating, talking only among themselves. None of them, especially Edward, glanced my way anymore.

When he sat next to me in class, as far from me as the table would allow, he seemed totally unaware of my presence. Only now and then, when his fists would suddenly ball up — skin stretched even whiter over the bones — did I wonder if he wasn't quite as oblivious as he appeared.

I still felt the electricity buzzing through me when I sat next to him. After all, he was a foot away from me, every day. I would grab the end of my desk to keep my hands to myself as I relived my sexual fantasies or some of my dreams. By the end of class, my panties would be wet, I would be hyperventilating and my knees would be weak. I'm glad he can't read minds; else I would be so embarrassed.

Meeting Edward seems to have awakened my sexuality. Now my hormones are playing catch up. I even want to go buy sexy underwear. I never wanted any of the guys in Phoenix the way I want him. Thank God, he is the trigger and I can't think of being with anyone else or Mike would be getting lucky. Anyway, when I give up my virginity, I wanted it to be with someone I really care about so I am content to satisfy myself. Maybe in a few years, I'll be able to think of some other guy this way. Until then, I have my fantasies, my dreams and my shower head.

The snow washed away for good after that one dangerously icy day. Mike was pleased that the beach trip would soon be possible. The rain continued heavily, the weeks passed and the dreams continued.

Jessica made me aware of another event looming on the horizon — she called to ask my permission to invite Mike to the girls' choice spring dance in two weeks. What made her think that I was interested in Mike?

"Are you sure you don't mind… you weren't planning to ask him?" she persisted when I told her I didn't mind in the least.

"No, Jess, I'm not going," I assured her. Dancing was glaringly outside my range of abilities.

"It will be really fun." Her attempt to convince me was halfhearted. I suspected that Jessica enjoyed my inexplicable popularity more than my actual company.

"You have fun with Mike," I encouraged.

The next day, Jess was acting strange but I didn't put the pieces together until I had this strange conversation with Mike after lunch.

I was in my seat in Biology and he was perched on my desk. As always, I was electrically aware of Edward sitting close enough to touch.

"So," Mike said, looking at the floor, "Jessica asked me to the spring dance."

"That's great." I made my voice bright and enthusiastic. "You'll have a lot of fun with Jessica."

"Well…" He floundered as he examined my smile, clearly not happy with my response. "I told her I had to think about it."

"Why would you do that?" I let disapproval color my tone, though I was relieved he hadn't given her an absolute no.

His face was bright red as he looked down again. Pity shook my resolve.

"I was wondering if… well, if you might be planning to ask me."

I paused for a moment, hating the wave of guilt that swept through me. I saw, from the corner of my eye, Edward's head tilt reflexively in my direction.

"Mike, I think you should tell her yes," I said.

"Did you already ask someone?" Did Edward notice how Mike's eyes flickered in his direction?

"No," I assured him. "I'm not going to the dance at all."

"Why not?" Mike demanded.

I didn't want to get into the safety hazards that dancing presented so I quickly made new plans.

"I'm going to Seattle that Saturday," I explained.

"Can't you go some other weekend?"

"Sorry, no," I said. "So you shouldn't make Jess wait any longer — it's rude."

"Yeah, you're right," he mumbled, and turned, dejected, to walk back to his seat. I closed my eyes and pressed my fingers to my temples, trying to push the guilt and sympathy out of my head. When Mr. Banner began talking. I sighed and opened my eyes. Edward was staring at me curiously, that same, familiar edge of frustration even more distinct now in his black eyes. After gym, I rushed to the parking lot.

I almost had a stroke when I rounded the corner and saw a tall, dark figure leaning against the side of my truck. Then I realized it was just Eric. I started walking again. We had an awkward conversation where he wanted me to ask him to the dance. I let him down gently with my "I'll be out of town" line. He slouched off, back toward the school. As he walked away, I heard a low chuckle. Edward was walking past the front of my truck, looking straight forward, his lips pressed together.

I yanked the door open and jumped inside, slamming it loudly behind me. Edward was in his car already, sliding out smoothly in front of me, cutting me off. He stopped there — to wait for his family. I looked in my rearview mirror. A line was beginning to form. Directly behind me, Tyler Crowley was in his recently acquired used Sentara, waving. I was too aggravated to acknowledge him. While I was sitting there, I heard a knock on my passenger side window. I looked over; it was Tyler. I glanced back in my rearview mirror, confused. His car was still running, the door left open; I leaned across the cab to crank the window down.

"I'm sorry, Tyler, I'm stuck behind Cullen." I was annoyed — obviously the holdup wasn't my fault.

"Oh, I know — I just wanted to ask you something while we're trapped here." He grinned.

This could not be happening.

Once again, I had to turn down an invitation to the dance. What part of girl's choice these guys don't understand? He took it very well saying, "That's cool. We still have prom." And before I could respond, he was walking back to his car. I could feel the shock on my face. In his rearview mirror, Edward's eyes were on me. He was unquestionably shaking with laughter, as if he'd heard every word Tyler had said.

During dinner, I told Charlie I was going to Seattle for the day a week from Saturday. I promised him that I'd stop in Montesano and Olympia — and Tacoma for gas if I have to. He was worried about me not going to the dance but I assured him that I didn't want to go. He, of all people, could understand that — I didn't get my balance problems from my mother. Now I had a solid plan in place to back up my lie.

That night, I was in bed, reflecting on my strange day. I started thinking about Mike, Tyler and Eric and the obvious difference in how teenage boys responded to me here. I was sure I looked exactly the same as I had in Phoenix. Maybe it was just that the boys back home had watched me pass slowly through all the awkward phases of adolescence and still thought of me that way. Perhaps it was because I was a novelty here, where novelties were few and far between. Possibly my crippling clumsiness was seen as endearing rather than pathetic, casting me as a damsel in distress. Is this because of my awakened sexuality? Am I giving off some vibe or acting differently? Whatever the reason, I had three guys who wanted to go out with me.

As I looked back on the invitations, I realized that Edward was around for all of them and he acted strangely after I turned down each one. Was he eavesdropping on my conversations? Maybe he was acting weird because he wanted to see if I was interested in any of the other guys in school. What did it matter to him anyway? Did he regret his decision to stay away from me? I wondered where our relationship could have gone if he had let it progress. I'm still deeply in love with him. Part of me will always love him. Isn't first love supposed to be the most intense? Could he be feeling something for me too? Hope started to blossom in my heart. I hugged my pillow and drifted off to sleep with a smile on my face.