Disclaimer: Not my characters, I'm just barrowing them.
A/N: Some of the facts I think I've made up (timeline of when Cal and Gillian met and when Gillian got married) but if someone knows the timeline let me know and I'll fix it. Enjoy!
Dinner was at a place they went to often. The owners even knew Gillian's propensity for sweets. During initial drinks Cal started a conversation he'd wanted to start for a very long time.
"Why did you get into this business?" He leaned towards her. He'd never asked her about her past even though he knew from her face enough to make him want to protect her from as much as he could. Gillian cleared her throat before talking.
"Well, I first found psychology in high school and it helped me rationalize things in my life that made me unhappy." She took a sip of her drink realizing she was still holding back. "My father was an alcoholic and sometimes he used. It was easy enough for me to stay out of his way but not for my mother. She was unstable in the first place and they would get into these fights that would last for hours. Then she'd leave for a few weeks. It was rough. Psychology gave me a window into the why. And you know how I came into the deception detection program." She smiles remembering.
"That I do." He smirks remembering the day he got a call from a colleague raving about his latest pH D candidate. Cal had refused to listen to his colleague until the DOD gave Cal his own team. It was years later when he called up his friend to inquire about the promising student. "You were how old then?"
"Twenty-eight. I'd just finished my first round of clinicals. My dissertation was finally finished and in comes this slouched over Englishman to offer me a job before I'd even finished my degree." She laughs as he makes a face when she says he slouches.
"I remember how polished you were even then. I was amazed. I think until recently that was one of the only times you read me."
"Cal, I read you all of the time. I've just trained myself not to respond any more."
"Oh you think you have do you?" He grins at her. "It's amazing that we can see past all the lies to find the person underneath." He comments offhandedly.
"It's the lies we tell that show what is underneath."
"I know but I don't want to have that type of relationship with you, luv." He reaches across the table and captures her hand.
"Well unless you're going to start practicing Loker's Radical Honesty, we'll eventually have to lie to one another. Even if it's a white lie."
"What do you mean luv?" He looks puzzled.
"Like, "Yes that dress looks great on you." "Of course I don't mind if we go to your favorite restaurant tonight." "I love dogs and children." "Sure go on vacation without me.""
"You want to go on vacation without me already? Wow this date has taken a down turn fast." He grins mischievously as he strokes the back of her hand with his thumb. She purses her lips while trying not to smile. "We haven't even been on a vacation together yet and you're already looking for your space!" He teases her.
"You know what I mean Cal." His face softens a bit when she says his name.
The rest of the meal is filled with light conversation about work and Emily and Gillian's new found freedom.
"So what is the plan for the rest of the night?" Gillian asks they stand outside of the restaurant. Cal moves his arm around her waist pulling her close while they walk to the car.
"I have your final surprise at my placed." He says opening the door for her once again.
"Wow, you're such a gentleman when you're on a date." She says kissing him on the cheek before getting in.
"Isn't that what you're supposed to do on a date?" He asks puzzled as he starts the car.
"Yes but we've known each other for how long now? About 12 years now. Oh good god that is a long time isn't it?" Cal laughs. "Anyways, I never thought I would be on a date with you opening the car do for me."
"And why is that? Is there something wrong with me?" He asks seriously. Gillian laughs.
"No Cal. When we met you were married, and from the outside, at least, it looked happy. I was very young at the time and thought of you and Zoë as my compass."
"Oh dear lord are you serious?" He asks pulling into his drive. "Now there's a scary thought."
"Well yours was a relatively healthy relationship when we met. And you have to consider what I grew up with. Not exactly normal."
"No wonder your marriage tanked." He teases opening the front door.
"Cal…" She scolds. "I just figured you wouldn't have any interest in me."
"But you saw the attraction." He says puzzled as he takes her jacket and leads her to the kitchen.
"Cal, we're attracted to hundreds of people a week. I didn't start seeing the other emotional responses for years after we first me. Actually mostly since you got divorced."
"Yeah but I saw yours." He says lifting the cover off of a small chocolate cake. It was enough of a distraction she forgot what he said for a moment and stares at the cake. "It's also got pudding on the inside. Do you know how hard it was to find someone to put pudding in a cake?" He says incredulously. She beams and moves to get two plates.
"So what do you mean you saw my emotional responses?" She asked as she cuts the cake. "Oh did you want some?" She teases.
"No. I'll be fine with a scotch." He says opening his cupboard. "What I meant is that you felt something for me long before I felt something for you."
"I did not!" She exclaims far too adamantly. She catches herself and restates, "I have no idea what you're talking about Cal."
"I can prove it to you." He says taking his glass and disappearing into his study. She follows him with her cake. "Oi, no food allowed near the research." He says. She stops at the threshold and smiles.
"What are you looking for?" She inquires.
"Never you mind. I'll find it shortly enough." He sifts through one of his drawers. "Oh, there it is." The photo had been right on top but Cal didn't want to give Gillian any more ammunition than she already had. He hands her the photo. It was at Gillian's wedding. More of a candid shot than anything else. It was of Cal and Zoë, Gillian was offset to the right watching the couple. The sadness on Gillian's face was apparent, along with the strain Zoë felt. Cal looked oblivious to it all.
"I've never seen this picture before." She says taking it from him and studying it.
"No one has." He says sticking his hands in his pockets. "I didn't even show it to Zoë. Had the pictures developed and picked them up myself. I took it out and threw away the negatives claiming the store must have forgotten them." He looks sheepish as he says it.
"I don't think this proves your point." She says showing some anger.
"Are you angry you were caught on your wedding day or that you didn't know?" He asks taking the picture back.
"Both." She says taking her plate back to the kitchen. "Why didn't I know it?"
"Didn't we have this discussion once already today? We're all expert liars to ourselves." He moves up behind her and turns her around to face him. "Why the shame?" He asks brushing an errant strand of hair out of her eyes.
"If you could see it, then it's likely that it leaked out in my marriage. Maybe I am more to blame than I'd like to think." She says.
"This is a no guilt house. You're not allowed to feel guilty here." He moves out of her way as she moves to sit on the couch with her legs tucked under her.
"So you've know for what? Six years now that I've been in love with you?" He sits next to her, close enough to touch. He wraps an arm around her shoulders and pulls her closer.
"Cal." She breathes as his lips touch the skin of her neck. He can't tell without her facial expressions if it's a sign of encouragement or warning.
"Say it again luv." He says, his lips dancing across the delicate skin of her neck.
"What?"
"Say my name again."
"Cal, I thought we were going to discuss this." She says pressing a hand against his shoulder, trying to get him away from her so she could think.
"I think there are some things that need to be shown, rather than discussed." His voice vibrates against her skin. His teeth graze her earlobe and she turns her head to try to look at him. She stops trying to push him away and meets his eyes. The emotion she sees gives her hope and confidence.
"Then show me Cal." She whispers, almost afraid of what is to come. His arm around her shoulders moves her closer to him, embracing her closer. His other hand moves up her arm, stroking the soft skin there before traveling up to her neck and tracing his way softly to her brow. He watches her response closely, filing away what makes her sigh and what makes her gasp. She tries to maintain eye contact but ends up closing her eyes and enjoying the feeling.
His fingers move back down her jaw line, tracing and almost tickling. Cal adjusts himself as he can feel his body reacting, trying to draw her closer. He fights the natural reaction to pull Gillian closer and continues tracing his finger down the front of her throat before dipping one finger into her cleavage. Gillian's eyes fly open at the unexpected touch. He grins broadly and moves his fingers back up her throat to trace her lips.
Gillian can feel her breath coming faster as she watches Cal watch her. This time she keeps her eyes open trying to read every emotion running through his features. At this distance she can see all of it. Love, passion, friendship, but mostly at this point it's all been muddied by arousal. Her lips part slightly as his fingers focus on that small part of her anatomy. He stops tracing her lips and moves them closer before capturing her lips with his, which elicits a gasp from Gillian.
Their kisses aren't gentle, not with so much passion built up over so long. Both try to keep the kisses small and tame but the passion overrides the rational thoughts that kept the two apart for so long. With the line gone, the passion had taken over. Gillian is the first to let out a frustrated noise before breaking away.
"Cal." She says softly.
"I know luv. I feel it too." He says pulling away a fraction before his lips are on hers again. He knows they can't take it much further tonight. He wouldn't scare her off and he did want to hold onto the thrill of newness of a relationship with Gillian for as long as he could. His body ached for hers but then again it had for years now. He lets out a frustrated moan as her hands and arms pull him tighter then break away. "Dangerous, you are." He whispers against her lips. "You take away all of my control with those lips." She smiles and kisses him quickly.
"Maybe you should take me home then?" She suggests trying to move away from him.
"No luv. I can handle this." He says adjusting her so she isn't facing him but still wrapping her in his arms. He moves against the arm of the couch, pulling Gillian with him. "I'm not ready to let you go for the night." He whispers into her hair.
Gillian can feel the affect she's had on him and smiles shyly to herself. She adjusts herself against him, knowing that she is pushing him.
"I told you I didn't think you were a good girl." He says. She can hear the smile on his face. She moves slowly against him again, making the movement more suggestive this time. "Gillian." He warns.
"Yes Cal?"
"Stop that. I would never have thought you'd be such a damn tease when here I am trying to be good." Gillian laughs and settles against Cal.
"It's just that I don't see you lose control all that often."
"So you think that its fun to push when I'm not in control?" He asks.
"No. I think it's fun and feels nice to have you respond to me. Makes me feel good about myself." She smiles.
He moves so his chin is resting on her shoulder and whispers in her ear, "I can make you feel even better." He says against her skin.
"Sounds like a promise to me." She says idly taking his hand.
After a while the nervous sexual energy wears off and its just the two of them enjoying the closeness of being able to hold one another without thinking about the repercussions. After who knows how long Gillian's head started to shift forward as she fell asleep. Cal jostled her.
"Time to take you home luv." He said moving his arms from around her. They stood, adjusting their clothes and Cal smiled and Gillian nervously tugged at her clothes far more than was necessary. "No one can tell." He said jokingly. "You have the benefit of being the girl. No one can tell."
Gillian smacks him playfully on the arm before walking over to get her purse and jacket. The ride to Gillian's is short but Cal plays with her hand while he drives, unable to stop touching her now that he's started. He gets out and walks her to her front door.
"Goodnight luv." He says as he kisses her once more. He steps back smiling at her. "See you Monday." He says.
"Night Cal." She says reaching to open her door.
TBC...