"Jimmy! What happened? You've got blood all over your uniform!"
"I-"
"Do you have any idea how much work those stains will be? My life is difficult enough without having to worry about you fighting."
"But Mum, I wasn't-"
"I don't want to hear your excuses!" –slap- "Now go wash yourself up and quit crying!"
As Jim led John into his flat, he took a moment to appreciate the authentic look of the place and made a mental note to thank Seb for suggesting a decorator instead of doing it himself. Just the idea of Swedish modular furniture had made Jim shudder in disgust but after seeing it put together he felt that it added a certain believability to his IT worker persona. They had even gone so far as to place a laptop, magazines, books, dishes on a drying rack, and shoes in the front entry. Despite all of those careful preparations, John barely gave the flat a cursory glance instead focusing solely on Jim.
Without saying anything, John moved closer to him, holding him in an intent gaze. Gently he clasped Jim's cheek and brought their foreheads together while Jim slid his hands onto John's waist. The lean muscles were warm and comforting, making him feel like he was home for the first time. John brought his other hand to the back of Jim's head, carding his fingers through the dark brown hair. The kiss started out soft and chaste until Jim unconsciously moaned, causing John to pull him in closer and begin opening his mouth.
Jim felt as if his body had been made to fit into John's arms; their heights were almost the same but Jim's frame was smaller and slotted perfectly together with John's military toned physique. As the kiss intensified, Jim allowed John's tongue into his mouth as the man gripped tighter and then thread his hand through his hair. In response, Jim slid his hands under John's striped jumper and grasped at the warm skin of his back. John pulled his mouth back slightly and smiled, breathily saying, "I've wanted to do that since the moment I saw you at the lab."
He then began pressing wet kisses along Jim's jaw line and down his neck, licking and nipping at the spot where neck met collarbone. As he kept kissing and sucking, John began leading Jim toward the small bedroom mostly filled with a partially unmade, low lying bed. Jim stood at the foot of the bed and looked into John's eyes, requesting in a husky voice, "Take your shirt off."
John gave a mischievous smile as he replied, "No, you take yours off first."
Jim flinched instinctively as he had not been commanded by someone in over a decade but shook the feeling away quickly as he removed his jumper and t-shirt. He started on his jeans but John tutted and scolded him playfully, "Now you take off my shirt."
Reaching out with nervous hands, Jim awkwardly pulled John's jumper up over his head realizing it was the first time he had taken someone else's clothes off. He had many companions throughout his life but they were always subservient and complying to his every wish. John was the only person he would ever consider humbling himself for. Once the jumper was finally off, Jim gazed at John's bare torso while gently moving his hand along the surprisingly firm muscles.
Jim's tender touches seemed to arouse John even more, causing him to wrap his arms around Jim and back him onto the bed. John quickly climbed on top of him and began planting kisses along his body, starting with his neck then trailing down his chest onto his abdomen finally reaching the fly of his jeans. Jim was rapidly losing himself in the overwhelming pleasure of being touched by John and took a moment to realize John's mouth had halted its progress. He propped himself up on his elbows and saw John gazing up at him.
"What's wrong?" Jim asked.
"I know we're moving fast but I'm serious about you. I want this to be the beginning of something, not a one-off," John replied earnestly. "Are you sure this is what you want?"
Jim's heart threatened to beat out of his chest as he scrambled to answer, "Oh God, yes."
A wide smile grew on John's face before he swiftly unbuttoned Jim's jeans and pulled them off along with his specially chosen underwear. John stood at the end of the bed, gazing down at Jim's naked body, seeming to take in every detail. In a low, husky voice, John remarked, "You're absolutely beautiful, more beautiful than I ever could've imagined." He began unbuttoning and removing his own jeans while he said, "I want to fuck you so bad. Do you want that, Jim?"
In his entire adult life, Jim had never felt so vulnerable than at that moment having to look up at the man he loved and nod his head, saying, "Yes, please fuck me, John."
John, after having removed his jeans, knelt between Jim's legs and leaned down to place a soft, warm kiss on Jim's belly. He continued his kisses as he lowered his head, eventually running his tongue along the length of Jim's painfully hard cock. As John expertly took him into his mouth, Jim arched his back and moaned loudly causing the doctor to chuckle then pull his mouth off and ask, "Do you have any lube?"
It took a second for Jim's mind to calm down enough for him to register the words but when he did, he reached out to the bedside table happy they had included the lubricant he requested. After handing it to John with an embarrassingly shaky hand, John resumed sucking him but added a slick finger, working on loosening his entrance. By the time John had added a third finger, Jim was at his breaking point, breathlessly calling out, "Please, take me now."
John placed a pillow under Jim's hips as he lined himself up between the man's spread legs. He pushed himself in slowly as he leaned down to kiss Jim deeply, seeming to devour his moans. Jim gasped at the painful pressure but still clutched onto John's back, begging him to stay inside. Once the pain subsided, Jim began to relax his muscles and whispered for John to move. As John gradually built up a rhythm, the initial discomfort gave way to a growing pleasure. Jim had been penetrated before but it had never felt so intense, so personal.
While John thrust harder, he reached between them and stroked Jim in time with his movements causing the younger man to moan louder and babble in ecstasy. Jim's complete loss of control and coherence made him glad he had vetoed the idea of installing cameras in the flat. The last thing he needed was his men, especially Seb, seeing him so undone by John. As he felt his orgasm mounting, Jim announced in gasps, "I'm gonna come," causing John to articulate his movements and hit his prostrate with each thrust. Almost immediately after Jim came onto his abdomen and John's hand, John began to pull out but Jim locked his legs to hold him in.
"No, come inside me."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, please John, I need it," Jim answered, nearly overcome with emotion from his intense climax.
With a shudder, John released inside Jim who reached out and pulled their bodies together, scared to let go of John for even a second. It took a great deal of placating and sweet kisses for Jim to finally detangle himself and allow John to fetch a towel from the bathroom.
John had drifted to sleep soon after returning to the bed to clean them both off, allowing Jim time to rest his head on John's chest and listen to his steady heartbeat. Soon his eyes fell upon John's scar on his left shoulder. The bullet from the high speed rifle travelled straight through from back to front and effectively ended his military career. Jim had acquired his medical records both from Afghanistan and London, covering the time of the initial injury to the physical therapy to the psychological therapy. He had been going through hell because of the injury, memories of war, boredom, and lack of purpose, all of it Jim's fault.
Over the years, Jim had ordered and oversaw the deaths of so many people he had lost count, but seeing John's wound sent a sickening wave of guilt rushing through his body. Somehow in his mind, Jim had justified the shooting as necessary to keep John out of combat in the most dangerous place on Earth, but staring at the results made him feel sick. Just like in their school days, Jim's love had brought John nothing but misery. The self-hatred that he had pushed down so far he barely recognized was surfacing.
Before he knew it, Jim was sobbing and could not stop himself. As he tried to roll over and get out of bed, he was enclosed by John's strong arms and held against the man's body. Jim babbled repeatedly, I'm so sorry, but John kissed the top of his head and cooed, don't worry, I'm here. Eventually, Jim drifted to sleep with dreams of John saving him from drowning.