#3

Requested by: Kira Temeki

Characters: Sasuke, Sakura, Naruto, Kakashi, Iruka

Situation: Set after the Chuunin exams' second test. Team Seven got a free meal to Ichiraku and their just … eating.

Specifics: Sasuke has hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia (fear of long words), Naruto has a sudden love of big words, Kakashi makes no sense, and Sakura has a bad care of ablutophobia (fear of washing or bathing).

Pairing: None

Length: 1244

Style: Third person; past tense

Setting: Ichiraku's Ramen Bar

-Could You Repeat That?-

Iruka had held true to his word about the ramen after that second exam, and Naruto was insanely glad. The blond clutched tighter at Iruka's arm, happily babbling about how hungry he was and how he couldn't wait to eat some delicious ramen at long last. Walking beside the duo was the rest of Team Seven, including Sasuke, Sakura, and Kakashi – all of which were doing the usual. Sasuke was dutifully ignoring Sakura's desperate attempts to con him into a date, Sakura was practically glued to the dark-haired boy's hip, and Kakashi – well, needless to say, he was reading his favorite book.

When they finally arrived at the ramen stand itself, everyone seemed to pause, wondering why they were all together in the first place. It really didn't matter, but it was curious that Kakashi had pleaded to come along … no matter what. His excuse was that he wanted to keep an eye on his worn out 'team'. Likely story.

"Iruka-sensei! You're paying right?" Naruto asked at once, taking a seat and dragging the man down to sit on the stool next to him. "Pretty please?"

Iruka sighed, shaking his head. "I … well, I'm low on cash at the moment."

"I'll pay." Four pairs of eyes looked at Kakashi strangely. "I'm a Jounin, I make more money." The masked shinobi shrugged, not even glancing up from his book.

"Well, thanks, Kakashi-senpai," Iruka muttered on his breath. "I feel so much better now."

"You should. I'm spending my money, after all."

Iruka seriously wanted to strangle the man.

"Kakashi-sensei, that isn't very nice," Sakura scolded lightly, scratching at her cheek – which was caked with quite a bit of grim because of their adventures in the nice, remote 'Forest of Death' as it were.

"Well, some would say not taking a shower before going out to eat isn't very nice, but you don't hear me nitpicking."

"He does have a point, Sakura-chan." Naruto nodded his head in agreement with his sensei. "I mean … when was the last time you took a bath? Last October?"

"Naruto!" she hissed through clenched teeth. "How – how dare you!" Her hands itched to wrap around his neck. "I … well, when I take a damn bath shouldn't be important!" She shivered at the mere idea. After all, it wasn't her fault that she had a stupid disinclination to bathe … she hated washing. There was just something strange about it that appalled her. Sure, she was fine with just rinsing water over herself, but the whole … scrubbing and stuff. She shivered again. Wouldn't that irritate her precious skin?

"Tch, why did I agree to come here?" Sasuke grumbled as Sakura tugged him to a seat beside her.

"Because … you can't leave me with … those two!" Sakura pointed a finger in the general direction of Kakashi and Naruto. "They're idiots!"

Iruka nodded. "But at least Naruto isn't a pervert, too."

"Hey!" two voices chorused at the same time.

"Are you implying that I'm stupid?" Naruto shouted.

"How'd you know I was a pervert?"

"No, Naruto, I … don't think you're stupid." Iruka edged away from the crazy blond.

"Damn straight! And I'll prove it! From now on I'll use really, really big words."

Sasuke frowned, not liking what that would entail. "No … you'll just make yourself out to be a bigger dobe than you already are."

"I concur. And Iruka … it would make me positively giddy if you were to tell me how exactly you knew I was a pervert." Kakashi was looking at the Chuunin school teacher curiously, waiting for his answer with an expectant air.

"Genma," replied Iruka easily, refusing to go into detail.

Kakashi nodded a little. "Ah, that'll explain it." He went back to reading his book again, bored.

"Hey, hey, Iruka-sensei! I just thought of a big word I can use!"

"What is it, Naruto?" Iruka rubbed his temples, he was already getting a major headache from this experience. It was too weird. And they hadn't even order ramen yet!

"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!"

Sasuke covered his ears at the loud scream, wincing at the long word. He hated such things with a passion. Once he was done with Itachi, he was going to erase all big words from the dictionary and be done with it. He absolutely hated big words. And he wasn't afraid to admit, either. "Oi, dobe, shut up." All right, maybe he was, but he chalked it up to his pride working overtime.

Naruto stuck out his tongue childishly. "No, I'll say whatever the hell I want to! So there!"

"Could you repeat that word, Naruto? It sounded like a bunch of gibberish to me," Iruka said, tilting his head slightly to see the boy. "I mean, honestly, where did that word even come from? The dark recesses of you mind?"

Naruto bobbed his head up and down. "Yeah! It did! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!"

"I said shut up, you complete moron!" Sasuke pressed his hands further against his ears, trying to block the sound out. When Naruto refused to shut up, he started humming, drowning out the sound of the blond's voice.

"What, your small brain can't compute all those large words, Sasuke-teme?" Naruto mocked, tapping his chin with a finger. "Oh! How about this one! Floccinaucinihilipilification, the act of estimating worthlessness! Like yours!"

"Don't you mean yours?" muttered Sasuke, before remembering he was supposed to be humming and continuing with that as if to save himself from Naruto's non-witty retort.

"I am not worthless! I'm going to be Hokage one day!"

"Yes, and then you and your big words can rule the world," replied Sasuke sarcastically, not even having to hear the response to know what the idiot had said.

"Damn right! I shall have full control over everything once I learn every big word in the world!"

Sasuke shivered; the horror of that idea setting in. Anything but those big words! Damn him!

"Naruto since when have you used words like 'shall'?" Iruka inquired, looking at the boy like he'd grown another head.

"Since now! When I decided I was going to take over the world!" Naruto rubbed his hands together, a large grin on his face.

"Tch, like you could!"

"Don't make me threaten you with big words!" Naruto reprimanded.

Sasuke whimpered. "No! Anything but that! No!"

"Heh, I think I will anyway. This one's my favorite …" Naruto leaned over toward Sasuke, staring him directing in the face. "Smiles."

"Ah! The pain …" Sasuke clawed at his ears. "Why me …? Wait a second …" He stopped his melodramatic actions and glared at Naruto. " 'Smiles' isn't a big word, baka!"

"Yes, it is!" Naruto denied, beaming. "It has a 'mile' in-between the first and last letter!"

"Why you … you complete and utter imbecile! How dare you make fun of me!"

"Naruto." Kakashi looked up. "You know, 'smiles' really isn't the longest word in the world."

"Kakashi-sensei!" The blond groaned. "You're taking his side?"

Kakashi shrugged. "Not really. Merely pointing out that it isn't the longest word you could use to torment him with. Actually … that word would be beleaguered. If you really want to get serious," the masked Jounin drawled lazily, turning the page in his book without even a glance up.

"Be … leaguered?" Naruto questioned. He grinned. "Hey! Why didn't I think of that! That word has a whole 'league' in the middle! And where's my ramen, dammit?"

A/N: This … this is the real reason Sasuke went to Orochimaru! (Grins) Just kidding! Heh, let me know what you think of these so far. And I'd appreciate some more challenges, too. This one .. well, it was my last. Hope you all liked it!