The fourth chapter is an acceptable chapter to get on first name basis… right?
"So, you've basically seen me naked, had me save your arse from getting ripped to pieces and now I am buying you breakfast. What more does a guy gotta do to learn your name?"
Stanford choked on his coffee, hoping to God that no-one in the diner had heard the highly inappropriately phrased question. He coughed and beat himself forcefully over the chest to rid his windpipe from the intruding liquid.
"I beg your pardon?" he managed in a hoarse voice and looked up at man on the other side of the booth, an ear-to-ear grin plastered on his young face. Ford was well aware of Stan's flirtatious nature, but never been actively subjected to it.
"I'm just saying, after an experience like last night", the shameless youngster made an unnecessary paus and Ford wanted nothing more than to sink through the laminated floor, "we should at least get on first name bases".
"It is basis, and can you stop talking about it as if we 'were up to something' last night?" the scientist growled, his face red as a traffic light.
"What do you mean?", Stan replied innocently, and for a moment Ford believed he had imagined it all, "We were up to something last night! I mean, that thing of yours, it was HUGE…" Ford flung himself half way across the table and grabbed the younger man by his shirt collar, knocking his coffee cup over in the process.
"Alright wise-guy!" he stopped himself as he felt the presence of a third party beside them. The twins looked up to see a waitress dressed in blue standing at the end of their table, one hand holding a pot of coffee and the other drumming agitatedly against her hip.
"Is everything alright over here?" she asked in that whiny voice every female waitress, secretary and phone operator seemed to possess.
"Right as rain Sugar pops", Stan reassured her with a million-dollar smile. He wrung the six-fingered hand from his shirt and pushed Ford back in his seat.
"It is just my Uncle here, he has one heck of a temper in the mornings, but it ain't nuthing I can't handle" he winked at the waitress who didn't seem especially impressed, "Sorry if he scared ya Hun".
Like a cliché he ran his hand through his hair before standing the knocked-over cup up and pushing it towards the female, "you wouldn't mind giving him a refill would ya?" the waitress let out an annoyed sigh and refilled the cup, before walking away.
Stanford, still irritated and embarrassed, glared at the younger man who just flashed him a grin and took a smug sip from the newly poured cup. Immediately regretting the decision and quickly stuffed his mouth full of syrup drenched pancakes.
"That tastes horrible!" he cried, "why would ya drink that?" shoving yet another piece of pancake in his mouth to get rid of the bitter taste.
It was Ford's turn to look smug, as he effortlessly took a long sip of the bitter brew.
God, he had missed coffee!
The multiverse had much to offer, but none of the places the interdimensional traveller had visited so far had had anything even close to blessing that was bitter black coffee. So, he was going to enjoy each and every cup he had the opportunity to drink before leaving this dimension.
On the other side of the table Stan forced the mouthful of pancakes down and beat himself theatrically over the chest, marking his victory.
"So, Uncle", the younger wiggled his eyebrows, "how about that formal introduction?" he held out a meaty hand towards Ford, index- and middle-finger visibly sticky with syrup. Ford shook his head and threw a napkin at the outstretched hand, not wanting to draw more attention to his abnormal extremity than necessary. Feeling that doing so would expose his true identity to the boy in front of him.
"Axol", he said, as his oblivious brother was in the process of getting more of the napkin stuck to his sticky fingers than getting the syrup transferred to the napkin, "Axol… Lutz".
"You German or something?" the question was polite rather than curious, as Stan was still preoccupied with battling the stubborn syrup.
"Austrian actually", the boy's head shot up, an amazed look in his wide eyes.
"So you have seen like kangaroos and killer sharks and stuff! You're some kind of monster/crocodile/bounty hunter then? That would explain a lot", Ford groaned at his brother's lack of general knowledge.
"Not Australia, Austria, birthplace of Mozart and Freud", Stan's face fell just a little, making it fairly obvious that he didn't clock the examples his breakfast companion was giving him.
"Right…" he said, tossing the shredded remains of the napkin onto the far end of the table.
"Not that I have ever been", the liar continued, "my parents moved to America before the war". He hoped his hasty calculations of Earth's timeline wasn't too far off. A lot had happened – and quite a few new cultures and otherworldly historical events had occurred - since he last studied WWII and the holocaust.
"They were Jewish", he added, something that caught the younger's attention.
"You're Jewish?" a smile Ford had never seen his brother wear in a religious context before decorated his face, "me too!" he exclaimed cheerfully and lifted his imaginary Kippah "Mazel tov!" he grinned and put his chin in his palm, elbow against the table.
"Well, my family is… well, just my ma really", the grin faded a bit, "she came here because of the war as well", he trailed off, not wanting to go into detail. Ford understood, it wasn't a pleasant story. But the boy soon regained his mood and continued.
"But both me and my brother have had our Bar Mitzvah and fair share of Saturdays ruined because of the Shabbat", he laughed and put his hand forward once again, "Shalom, my fellow Jew!"
The boy looked so happy to have met a potential friend that Ford couldn't deny him a second time. He remembered how all they had had as kids and teenagers were each other. No one wanted to be friends with the freak and his dumb brother, so they had become an inseparable duo - well, what they believed to be inseparable.
The freak took the dumb one's hand.
"Shalom Aleichem"
"Stan Pines" Stanley replied and smiled, shaking the other's hand eagerly. Not once giving away to have noticed the extra digit.
They finished their meal, and as the 'Uncle' was about to empty his third cup of coffee he leaned closer to his 'nephew' and asked in a hushed voice:
"So, exactly how does this 'dine and dash' business work?" he was met with the mischievous trademark grin and the boy leaned closer as well.
"Well, it depends… How good are you at climbing out bathroom windows?"
There you have it folks! Some stancest bonding. Thank you for reading, and review are as always very welcome. (Ford's name is based on Axolotl, will probably give his train of thought a thorough explanation in future chapters.)
If you guys have any suggestions or wishes for what our precious twins should get up to next, don't hesitate to tell me! Stay awesome dudez 3