Tabbie stirs out of her sleep and sits up slowly. She could feel a little small headache brewing, but luckily she didn't get smashed. With that thought, she sat up and looked at her cousin sprawled on the bed with one of her legs ripped out from underneath the comforter in the clothes she wore last night. Tabbie stretched and looked down at her phone. It was 10:13am. She grinned and hopped up out of bed and rushed to the bathroom to relieve her bladder. She got a good glimpse of herself in the mirror as she walked out and sighed. Her cousin obviously had sex last night, but she smelled… off. Tabbie exited the bathroom and just stared at her cousin. She felt weird for knowing the scent of sex, but it was just something you picked up. She swore she almost smelled like Sheldon… the hint of talcum powder and cleaning supplies… but, then again, she did see him help her and Jugg. She shrugged off the weird feeling… it wasn't any of her business anyway.

She moved to her bag and tried to unzip it quietly, but her bag didn't have the same thought. Tabbie grit her teeth and hoped… she heard her cousin's dramatic moan and turned to see her sitting up looking horrible. Her blonde hair was matted and jolting everywhere… her eyes were darkened underneath… her clothes were wrinkled and twisted. Tabbie had to chuckle a little… yeah, her cousin SO had sex last night. Tabbie turned and whispered softly, "Mornin' Pen… how's that hangover treating ya?"

Penny groaned loudly and her hand went straight to her face, "Oh GOD… what the hell happened last night?"

Tabbie crossed her arms and smiled, "You drank like a thirsty camel… danced with Jugg… and then left the party with your deranged neighbor and sexy ass boyfriend."

Penny moved her legs and swung them on the edge of the bed and pushed them together to ready herself for the descent onto the ground and she grunted, "Oh… Well… it looks like I had sex. My legs are so sore and… my thong is backwards… and a little wet." Penny grinned, "I feel like I rode a bucking bronco."

Tabbie laughed as her cousin slipped off the pink thong to show her what she meant. The string that usually slips into the buttcrack was placed in the front and it hung heavy against her cousin's finger. Tabbie shook her head, "Well… at least you had fun AND had a gentleman to TRY and dress you back somewhat decently."

Penny scoffed as her feet touched the floor, "I didn't throw up on anybody, did I?"

Tabbie shook her head, "Not that I'm aware of."

Penny took a couple of steps, "Good! Oh MAN… I must've ridden Jugg really really hard. My inner thighs are on fire."

Tabbie grinned at her cousin, "Bucking Bronco…huh? Maybe you should start calling Jugg, Sea biscuit." Penny laughed as she moved past Tabbie towards the bathroom and Tabbie grinned. Then… she smelled it… talcum powder and the musky scent of sex. Tabbie furrowed her brow. Jugg was more of a Stetson cologne kinda guy, but she didn't smell that on her cousin, at all… just the talcum powder. Only one person either of them knew that smelled like that… Tabbie gathered some clothes she was going to wear after a well needed shower and began to see scenarios she really didn't want to see; mostly of a threesome involving Sheldon, Jugg, and her cousin. She shook her head and talked loudly to the door, "You might want to take some pain killers before your hangover decides to throw some hammers into your brain."

Penny's voice took over the noise of her peeing, "I don't have any. Maybe Sheldon has some."

Tabbie rolled her eyes, "Great… I was hoping I'd get to see his bright and crazy face this morning."

Tabbie threw her clothes on top of her bag and moved to the living room and out the front door. She moved across the hall and froze at the overwhelming smell of ammonia and other chemicals just hit her right in the nostrils, "Holy SHIT!"

She cringed as her eyes watered and she covered her nose and knocked three times on Sheldon's door. The door lurched open and a hint of Pinesol and Leather Oil went into the mix to make Tabbie nearly gag. Tabbie's eyes went saucer disk wide at the appearance of the man before her. He had a deep five o'clock shadow and the bags underneath his eyes were dark. His hair looked disheveled, his eyes were wild, and his pajamas looked wrinkled and clung to his body. Tabbie looked past him to see buckets, bottles, and brushes all near the couch then looked at him with concern, "Ummm… Dr. Cooper… are you… are you alright?"

Sheldon looked at her and she swore she saw a twitch, "I am most assuredly just fine."

She narrowed her eyes, "Right! Well, Penny is in need…"

Sheldon's abrupt cut off made Tabbie jump back a little, "PENNY? I-is she doing ok? She drank FAR too much… FAR too much last night. She needs some aspirin and a bottle of water and a very very hot shower."

Tabbie watched the man's body language. He was… nervous… refused to keep eye contact… couldn't stand still for no more than a few seconds. What the hell happened last night? Did… Did Sheldon 'The Crazy Bastard' Cooper kill someone? Oh GOD… He killed someone and cleaned up the mess… Tabbie play it cool girl. She cleared her throat and spoke, "Yeah… luckily she went home with Jugg and he was kind enough to bring her back. You know… after a very good night of 'wrestling'."

Tabbie grinned but it faded as she watched the man tense up and twitch. Tabbie swallowed deeply and worried he was going to kill her, TOO. OH GOD! This man was a fucking genius. It didn't matter that he had no muscle… he had SCIENCE! WHAT THE HELL WAS SHE GONNA DO?! Tabbie was hyperventilating and trying not to breathe the chemicals in the room at the same time. She started coughing as he went into the kitchen to grab a vial of pills from one of his cabinets. His hands were shaky and he seemed to be a very pale shade. He snatched open the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water. As he walked back towards her, Tabbie could see that something was completely off about him. He was staring at the floor as he walked… almost counting his steps. Tabbie noticed that everything was pushed away from the couch. That must be where he killed the person, she thought. He walked until he was only a mere few inches away from Tabbie and he threw his occupied hands out in front of his chest towards Tabbie. She flinched dramatically, thinking he was going to stab her, then opened her eyes to see the vial and water bottle. She steadied her breathing and gave the psycho a smile before taking the two items. She took in a little breath from her nostrils and she smelled it… vanilla… V-VANILLA? Penny's nasty Vanilla bean body spray… on his pajamas?

Tabbie's stare got wider and more pronounced as her brain danced a new rhythm. OH MY FUCKING GOD… "OH… MY… GOD!"

Sheldon jumped back at the woman's exclamation and his whole body froze. Tabbie shook her head in disbelief but… she hoped to GOD what she was thinking right now was… was NOT the truth, "OH MY GOD… Please tell me that-that you murdered someone on this couch!"

Sheldon's brows furrowed, "Good LORD, woman… No! If I were to perform the act of mur…"

Tabbie flung her hand in the air and cut him off, "NO! NO… NO! Please… Please tell me that YOU MURDERED SOMEONE! DO IT! SAY IT!"

Sheldon looked flabbergasted, "I will not for it is false."

Tabbie ran to Sheldon's door and slammed it shut and it made him tense up. She moved back to where they were only inches apart. Sheldon looked severely uncomfortable, but what Tabbie had to say next didn't need to be said loudly, "Sheldon… did-DID you…" Tabbie closed her eyes and couldn't see any other way of asking this. She let out a very deep sigh and looked at her boss and just blurted it out, "Did you have sex with my cousin?"

Sheldon's dark-ringed eyes shot open wide and he stared down at the woman before him. He didn't move or speak. Tabbie read him like a large print book. Tabbie dropped the pills and water bottle on the table and sat on the end of the couch and cradled her head in her hands, "Oh My God… OH MY GOD! What have you DONE?" She hopped up and got (relatively close) in his face and just snarled at him, "How COULD YOU? Damn it, SHELDON! You had your chance 7 damn YEARS AGO! Then you wait till she's in a fantastic relationship with a great guy to HAVE SEX WITH HER! DAMMIT!"

Sheldon shook his head and finally snapped out of his mute coma, "That is not how it happened. She engaged the act of coitus with ME."

Tabbie sharply turned and looked at him with fire in her eyes, "That is NOT an excuse! She came onto YOU?… THAT DOESN'T GIVE YOU THE RIGHT TO STICK YOUR DICK INSIDE OF HER!"

Sheldon cringed and closed his eyes tightly, "This is NOT fair. I insisted many times but… but she refused to listen to any of my demands. She used her whimsical charms to influence my baser instincts…"

Tabbie growled, "Well… look at that? Mr. Homo Novus is one of the regular GUYS." She scoffs and shakes her head, "A woman grabs a hold of your penis… and you turn into a lower life form. What a BIG shocker! Oh my GOD… I can't believe you did this! Dammit man, I thought you were GAY! I mean… A guy that lives with my horny-ass cousin for 7 years and NEVER ONCE TRIES TO GET IN BETWEEN THE SHEETS WITH HER. SHIT SHELDON! Oh MAN… WAIT! OH… oh Boy! Penny doesn't know what happened! She thought she had sex with Jugg last night! OH SONOFABITCH! Sheldon… You have to tell her! You have to tell her RIGHT NOW!"

Sheldon looked horrified, "I… I can't! I… I wouldn't know how to tell her."

Tabbie shook her head, the anger only building, "Oh… I don't know… maybe start with… 'Hey, neighbor… I fucked you on my couch last night'… That should get the conversation going."

Sheldon cringed again, "Please… LANGUAGE Ms. Lockhart."

Tabbie looked at him with such rage that Sheldon actually cowered under her stare. She pushed the man all the way back into his spot on the couch and pointed her finger in the man's terrified face, "You have no right to judge ANYONE, Man! Look'it Here, Mr. Universe… I'm going across the hall, give my cousin these pain pills and water, and then take a shower. By the time I get out of said shower… YOU BETTER HAVE TOLD HER or… OR… I'm Gonna tell her! YOU GOT ME?"

Sheldon nodded his head and Tabbie stood up straight, grabbed the pills and water bottle, and yanked the front door wide open. She stomped across the hall. Tabbie's mind was burnt out. The man who barely even shook hands with strangers just porked her cousin. Tabbie knew that something was going on between Penny and Sheldon, but she didn't know it was THAT deep of an issue. Penny's letters were easy for Tabbie to read… subtext and all. Her cousin had been in love with that lanky bastard for over 4½ years but she never acted on it. Now, come to find out that the germaphobic loon that Penny thought would never fall for her just dropped every idiosyncrasy he had and engaged in intercourse with her… ON HIS COUCH… IN HIS SPOT? Tabbie shook her head all the way into 4B and found her cousin doing squats and stretches beside the bed close to the window.

Tabbie shook the vial of pills to get her cousin's attention. Penny grinned, "What took you so long? Did you ask Sheldon about the importance of Child Locks on pill bottles… worst 4 minutes of your life… trust me."

Tabbie just gave a rusty smile, "Oh… you have no idea! Hey… I'm gonna go take a shower… why don't you go talk to Sheldon." Tabbie grabbed her clothes she left and rushed into the bathroom before her cousin could question her.

Penny took three pills out and opened the bottle of water and swallowed. She closed the water bottle back and threw it on her bed. She popped the top back on and turned the top's arrow to the opposite side… she knew Sheldon would double check it, but she liked to be less of a nuisance so to have the privilege of it the next time she had a hangover. She sighed and wondered what her cousin thought her and Sheldon would have to talk about, but it drifted out of her head as she crossed over the hallway to 4A. The horrific smell of cleaners and leather oil hit her nose hard. She knocked on the door and tried to ignore the pungent smell. Sheldon yanked open the door and a furrowed brow but the moment his eyes hit hers… they were round and panicked.

Penny gave a little look of shock before putting on a smile, "Oh God… Sheldon… did Amy bring one of her monkeys over here again? I told you… If they don't have a diaper… then they aren't potty trained."

Sheldon didn't even scowl at her remark and that made her a bit nervous, "Oh, Sweetie… what's wrong?"

She watched his eyes fall to the ground and his hands flexed, "Penny… please come in… there is something I need to discuss."

He moved to the side to allow her access and she slid in, trying to read him as she did. He shut the door behind her and methodically checked to make sure the door was properly shut then he locked the deadbolt. Penny watched him seemingly 'pep talk' himself and Penny knew that this wasn't going to be good, "Sweetie… whatever it is… I'm sure you can figure it out. You're the smartest guy I know…"

Sheldon spun around with the speed of the Flash, himself, and he look positively disgusted, "No… Penny… I am a brilliant man… but, I have done something very illogical. Something vile and unforgivable. Please… sit down." He moved and motioned her to the chair adjacent to his spot. She obliged, if only because of her curiosity and fear.

He sat in his spot and stared straight out and Penny's brow folded down. He looked pale and tired. He looked as if he had been up all night cleaning, throwing up, and pacing. His pajamas were wrinkled. Penny's heart started to hammer in her chest. What the hell happened to him last night?

Sheldon cleared his throat and continued to stare forward, "Penny… I don't know how to go about this delicately… I mean, how can one put words delicately? Words are just that… they are not some kind of lip balm that you can place harshly upon your lips. They are an utterance… written… texted… they are only as harsh as their message. Why in the days…"

Penny rolled her eyes and cut him off, "SHELDON!"

Sheldon let out a nervous sigh, "Forgive me."

Penny shook her head, "Sheldon… this is nonsense… Look at me!"

He closed his eyes tight, but that only made the images of Penny on top of him in this very spot that much more prominent.

Penny spoke more harshly, "LOOK AT ME!"

Sheldon, his eyes tight, raised his head and took in an inhale through his nose and exhaled through his mouth and his blue, watery eyes connected with earthen concern. Penny nodded, "Alright… now… whatever you have to say… just say it. Whatever it is… we'll deal with it. You and I, we're friends. We've seen each other at our extreme worst… Still… we got through it. There's nothing either one of us can't handle. We'll handle this problem… together." She grinned and said, "It really can't be that bad anyways, right?"

Sheldon flexed his hands into tight fists in his lap. She's right… They were friends… They can handle it. Very well… here we go. Sheldon cleared his throat and spoke as casually as possible, "Penny… last night… you and I engaged in coitus."

Penny's lips turned up in a smile then she held her stomach and gave out a pretty good laugh. Sheldon's jaw loosened and he stared at the woman in disbelief. She was taking this as a JOKE? Penny slapped Sheldon's knee while in mid laugh. Sheldon was positively shocked at her reaction. He was for sure that the woman would have shoved her knuckles into his Adam's Apple.

After a few moments, her laugh died down and she looked up. She saw the un-humorous look on his face… the regret… the utter horror and everything came crashing down around her. She let out a puff of air from the aftershock of laughter and pursed her lips. She racked her brain as hard as she could… trying to remember… to remember anything to prove that Sheldon was a damn fine actor, but everything was blank. Her smile faded and anger began to build, "Oh… Oh my GOD! Sheldon… Please… please tell me this is some really well played out Bazinga?"

He looked down at his twitchy hands and shook his head. She turned away from him in the chair and stared at the blank TV screen. She was… she was so confused… angry… embarrassed… terrified… what was she supposed to do? What was she supposed to say to him? A man that didn't even high five her after killing Raj and Howard in Halo because he was afraid that he would contract MALARIA! It was far too much… the images she created of her writhing on top of him was just too much. She felt sick to her stomach and stood up right in front of the chair but didn't move from that spot. She just stared and began to pant a little.

His voice cut into her panic and it was so full of regret that it made the situation so much worse, "I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. You were crying… I tried to comfort you… and you… you just…" Penny turned her body and looked down at him. She could feel her emotions rising, but she nearly gasped at how human he looked. His head was bowed and his fingers dug into the short hairs on top of his head as his palms lay flat against his scalp. His elbows rested on top of his thighs as his eyes shut unhealthily tight. His voice kept cracking as he spoke without looking up at her, "I can't get it out of my head. I can't stop seeing you… hearing you… smelling you… You are all around me and no matter what I do… you're… you're always there." He lets out an abrupt growling sigh and he jumps out of his spot and begins to pace back and forth in front of the couch in his crazy fashion all while speaking fast and using wild hand gestures, "My mind replays it over and over and no matter how loud I scream for it to stop… it just gets more vivid. I am the only one. The only one that will ever remember that night. I have tried to sleep, but every time I close my eyes… it sends my body into convulsions and throbbing that even I cannot ignore. I've done everything I could think of to take my mind off it. I've cleaned the couch more than six times… rearranged my comic books… hand washed my clothes in the bathtub… went into Leonard's old bedroom and stripped it bare… tried to differentiate the finalized components on my white board… I've drank cleaned the coffee pot several times, jogged in place for fifteen minutes, and even performed yoga on our Kinect thus my wrinkled clothing… but no matter what I do… something reminds me of you and the images come back stronger… you drown my senses and I have no idea how to retract you from my mind! This shameful event… I have taken advantage of you… I have become a man no different from those muscle-bound cretins you used to fornicate with. I am just another man."

Penny watched the man stop at the other end of the couch with his back to her as we whispered the last of the sentence. His shoulders lurched up and down as he panted from rambling, panicking, and possibly crying. Despite the horror that was encircling her… Despite the sickness she was feeling deep in her guy… Despite the wanting to break down and cry right there… She could tell that this… this affected him so much more, but something inside of her was churning. A bubbling of regret… not from having sex with Sheldon… but the regret that she couldn't remember it. She finally got past that damn ironclad defense of Sheldon's and she wasn't even coherent. She gave a very low sigh and approached him. She hesitated on her next move, but… she felt like this was the best way. She snaked her arms underneath his and wrapped them around his abdomen and embraced him tightly. Her cheek rested against his spine and she could feel it quivering underneath its taut skin.

He stuttered a little as he tried to decipher what was going on, "P… P… P… Penny… Wha… What are you doing?"

She had to be honest with him right now. She couldn't lie and tell him that everything was going to be ok… She had to tell him everything she felt, but she needed him to understand that what they did was still unforgivable… "Sheldon." She stopped and could feel him tense at his name, "Sheldon… I… I have…" She sighed again, pulled away from him, and tried to ignore the burning of her cheeks. She stomped her metaphoric foot just as Sheldon turned around to face her, "I have been secretly in love with you for about 4 years now. It wasn't until Leonard and Alex… You and Amy breaking up… the whole wedding thing… it wasn't until then when I started thinking about… you. God… but then I met James… he was so… he was exactly what I needed, but still… in the back of my mind… there was you."

She didn't look at him… she was far too afraid of the face he was making, so she kept her eyes on his chest but closed her eyes and chanced to stare into his eyes. He was tense… his jaw was tight and his Adam's Apple bounced as he swallowed hard. Penny took a step closer and finished her speech, "I love you so much, Sheldon… I always will… but I have Jugg now… and I am in love with him. Oh My GOD… I… I just said I loved him!"

Both of their faces turned to wide eyes and wonderment. Sheldon felt the tension of the situation fall a little and he gave Penny a grateful smile, "It seems as if you have beaten your phobia of saying the word 'Love'… twice in one sentence."

Penny grinned up at him, took one single step, reached up on her tippy-toes, and gave the man a brief kiss on the lips. She took a step back and appreciated the look of shock on his face, "Sheldon… I don't regret anything that happened last night… even if I HAD remembered it. I want you to know that. I'm sorry that our first time was so one-sided, but it can never happen again. You understand, right?"

Sheldon's face went into a serious expression, "I believe I do understand… I am the only one to remember the night of coitus and it would be safe to assume that you would like me to never speak of it? You love me, but you are IN love with Jugg and nothing could or ever will happen between us, again."

Penny pursed her lips and nodded, "Right."

Sheldon nodded, "Very well… but to be truthful with you… your cousin knows of what happened last night."

Penny stopped breathing and her eyes got very very wide, "Whhh… What?"

Sheldon swallowed and knew this was not a good moment and he started to get nervous, "She-she found out... when she came over to get your pain pills."

Penny didn't wait to hear anymore… She bolted out of 4A and darted to her apartment; leaving the door to 4A wide open. Sheldon cringed when he heard the muffled yells in the room next door. Tabbie was not going to be too happy the next time he saw her.