Again thank you to chocolate scones, dutchluv, caramelchan and Langfieldl. I'm so please that you take time out to review. This story is moving slowly but it's got lots of steam behind it I promise... Enjoy x

Chapter 4

After the codeine and after the prying lights of the camera had illuminated Nikki's bruising she was helped to scoot further down the bed by the nurses. Harry helped her lay back then sat down beside her holding her hand in both of his. Her dress and dressing gown had been removed and placed in clear plastic evidence bags and were waiting to be taken for testing. The doctor spoke but all Harry heard was "swabs" and "biological evidence" he held his breath and Nikki's grip tightened around his hand; he saw that her knuckles had turned white and tears rolled down her cheeks as she stared into nothing. Harry's hand hurt like hell but it was nothing like the pain he felt in his heart. She was his best friend, the closest friend he'd ever had and as he sat there feeling helpless and angry he realised that the feelings he'd kept hidden for so long were so much more than lust; he loved her, he was in love with her. He was going to get her through this, he made a vow to himself there and then that he was going to protect her forever no matter what the cost and if that meant not breaking down and crying in front of her now that's what he would do. He petted her hair gently,

"Nikki… …Nikki, please look at me…" she slowly rolled her head onto the side to face him; he kissed her hand "try not to think about it, think of something else, try-" she quietly groaned,

"It hurts, Harry it's hurting," Harry head snapped round to the nurse taking the swabs from Nikki

"HEY! What the hell are you doing to her?! You're hurting her!" he gritted back his anger he didn't want to frighten Nikki but his frustration was getting more difficult to control.

"I'm sorry but Miss Alexander needs several sutures, there's a significant amount of damage to-" Panicking about what he was about to hear Harry interrupted-

"I see, just… quickly, she's been through enough," he turned back to Nikki; her eyes were squeezed shut and she bit her bottom lip.

As Nikki lay there feeling vulnerable and exposed she held her eyes shut hoping to block out the searing pain that burned through her middle. She knew Harry's eyes were on her and if it had been different circumstances she would have attempted to make some quip remark but it wasn't and she was grateful that he'd agreed to stay with her throughout the physical exam. She attempted to do as Harry had suggested and think of something other than what was happing to her now: her mother, her gran, being happy in South Africa and Harry, always back to Harry but the distraction of Harry brought her back to the reality that she was trying to escape. How would she ever be able to admit her true feelings for Harry after this? Those emotions that she was sure he felt for her would certainly vanish. She knew no-one would want her now… now she was disgusting, filthy, repulsive. More so since she couldn't even remember what had happened to her; for all she knew she'd probably brought it on herself or at least that's what people would think. Tart, slut echoed through her mind. Yet she knew she wasn't; she thought to herself I'm not like that, I don't sleep around, I don't offer myself to just anyone, I'm picky, really I am… aren't I? I didn't want it, I mustn't have, I must have struggled, I must have? They hit me and the bruises and the blood and pain, and the bite… I wouldn't have wanted that… surely I said no or stop? I didn't want him to hurt me?

"I didn't want him to hurt me" it was barely audible but Harry heard, bent to her ear and whispered softly,

"I know, we know, you don't need to explain that to anyone-" The wheels of the trolley squealed as it was pushed to one side and both nurses left, one carrying the clothes in the evidence bags the other pulling the trolley. The doctor asked Harry to help her sit Nikki up and then handed over a small plastic cup containing 3 pills,

"Levonorgestrel, Diazepam and Azithromycin; I've written you a 2 week prescription for the Diazepam and Azithromycin. I think the police want to take your statement and then you can go home. I will get in touch with you as soon as we have your results back and I'll book you in for a consultation for 2 weeks time. I'll pop back in as soon as the police have finished, ok Miss Alexander?" Harry nodded on Nikki's behalf. The doctor left the room and silence embraced them as they searched each other's eyes. Harry wanted to punch something, anything but instead he held Nikki in his arms while she cried quietly into his chest. He felt her whole body tense then he realised that two uniformed officers had entered the examination room.

*

"Okay Leo… yes… right… I'll tell her. Yes, she's going to stay here tonight; she didn't want to go home, not that I'm surprised. That would be good, yes thanks. They said they'd be in touch… sleeping pills, antibiotics… 2 weeks. Will do, speak later, bye." Harry placed his telephone back in its charger and walked over to Nikki who was sat awkwardly on his sofa still wearing the hospital gown and Harry's jacket. Her head in her hands she merely said,

"What did Leo find?" Harry sat on the coffee table opposite her and sighed

"He spoke to Charlie; apparently you went to the toilet and the next thing you text her saying you'd had enough and was getting a cab home-"

"I don't remember that" her voice broke,

"Well Leo seems to think that the text message was not text by someone who'd had a few drinks or been drugged and it was sent at 2am, but you text me at 1-ish and it was clear that you were pretty hammered, I-" Nikki looked at him

"Wh-what did it say?"

"That you'd had enough and was getting a cab-" She shook her head,

"No, what had I text you?" she appeared panic stricken but Harry smiled.

"Gobbledygook… it was nothing… really, what matters is that you text me at around 1am and it was complete nonsense- not even spelled coherently yet an hour later you managed to text Charlie a completely comprehendible message? No. I think whoever… was with you text Charlie from your mobile so that you wouldn't be missed." Harry's voice had risen as he'd explained this to Nikki and his fists clasped the sides of the coffee table. He stood and stalked the empty space between his lounge and his kitchen.

"Ha-Harry… do you think it's my own stupid fault? Maybe I got blind drunk and … and took someone home? Told them to text Charlie?" she was holding her stomach and crying. He stomped over to her with fury on his face, he grabed her by both arms and shouted at her,

"Nikki you were drugged, you were drugged, you were not drunk! Christ, I've seen you plastered a thousand times before and you've always remembered every single intricate detailed of what people said or did! Some bastard spiked your drink, waited for it to take effect before carting you home-" he was stood and marching around his kitchen now "-had sex with you, raped you and beat you in the process-" Harry's fists smashed into his fridge. He pounded and kicked and yelled "-I'll KILL him, I'll KILL him. I swear to God- he'd wish he'd never laid eyes on-" he didn't stop his tirade until he had bust a hole into the surface of the plastic and realised that Nikki was stood next to him, he opened his arms out and Nikki stepped into them resting her head on his chest and he stroked her hair.

"Isn't that my job?" She managed through her tears; Harry kissed her on the top of her head. She stepped back and looked down to the floor, shaking her head slowly from side to side. "I'm disgusting, I can taste him, smell him on me, I need to clean. I want to bath, shower-" Harry reached out and held her hand,

"Let's run you a bath."

please review, i'd really appriciated it guys thanks x