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This chapter is dedicated to Sir Edward...a kind and patient friend. I'm sorry I haven't been in touch lately...I hope this makes up for it!
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Chapter 4.
I had just gotten out of the shower when I heard the hammering at my door. I wrapped one of the standard, army issue towels around my hips and, still dripping wet, dashed to see who it was. Commander Zack stood there, an incredulous look appearing on his face as he looked me up and down. Oh shit, I'd forgotten to salute him! Now I'd be in trouble.
Instantly, my hand left its tight hold upon the towel covering me, as I tried desperately to placate him. To my horror, I felt the towel slipping down. Now, I had a dilemma. Did I stand there, still holding my salute, naked?….Or did I disrespect my commanding officer by forgoing the salute to rescue my dignity? Blushing madly, I kept my stance, and let the towel drop to the floor, falling around my ankles. I really wanted to go on this mission with the General, and pissing off my commander could put an end to that dream. I heard him chuckle at my embarrassment and nudity. Great, at least I hadn't angered him.
"Sir?….Please Sir….May I have permission to retrieve my towel?" I asked, a little afraid he'd deny me. He hadn't stopped looking at me, and it un-nerved me a little. What could be so fascinating about looking at my naked body?
"Permission granted Cadet," he laughed, entering my room and closing the door. I quickly bent and picked up the towel, re-wrapping it more securely around my waist, and turning to see Commander Zack still watching me, his eyebrows arched.
"I can see why Sephiroth would want you," he said, softly. I looked back at him, puzzled. My physique wasn't that exceptional. I was quite scrawny compared to most of the other recruits. In fact, I was worried that my skinny frame would go against me. I had been working out really hard lately, even exercising in my free time, trying my hardest to pump my muscles up. I knew that some of the weapons I would be expected to wield later in my training were really heavy, and if I didn't have the arm power to hold them……….I must admit, even I had been surprised that the General had allowed me to join him on this mission. After all, I was hardly what you'd call an 'A-One Soldier'….. not yet, anyways.
"Strife? Are you sure you want to go? If you'd rather stay, I can always make excuses for you." The commander stared at me, and I stared back. Not want to go? How could he say that? Of course I wanted to go. Who wouldn't?
"You do know why he wants you to go, don't you?" he asked. Well…..No. Frankly, I didn't. And I didn't really understand the question. And I was more than a little piqued by the tone of voice the commander had just used. He sounded angry. But why the hell would he be angry? Was it because he hadn't been asked to go? Perhaps he felt, as the better person, he should be going in my place.
Now I felt awkward. I had two years left to serve under this man, and he could make my life a living hell. Perhaps this conversation was his way of saying I didn't deserve to go…… that I wasn't going. I couldn't hide the disappointment from my face, dropping my head down so he wouldn't see the tears that sprang suddenly to my eyes. Why leave it until now, until the very last minute, to tell me that I couldn't go?
"Strife, you still want to go? Even knowing what he has planned for you?"
I raised my head up and looked at him, perplexed. "I….I don't understand Sir," I said. "I thought that my name had been forwarded to him, that I'd been recommended for the mission, Sir," I answered.
The commander grinned. "Oh, so that's how he explained it to you, is it?" He sighed, running a hand through his thick black hair, before questioning me again. "How many lovers have you had, Strife?"
"Sir?" What the hell sort of question was that?
"Lovers, Strife….Male or female. How many have you had?" I just stared at him, my mouth open and eyes wide. No way…..my commander could not have just asked me such a thing! He came toward me, and with one finger pushed my jaw closed, laughing at me. His hand trailed down my bare arm.
"How many people have touched you Cloud…. intimately?" I backed away from him, as if his contact burned. "As I thought….you're untouched, aren't you boy?" he said, confidently. Okay, so he was right. But…so what if I was a virgin? What difference did it make to the mission I was supposed to go on? I couldn't see the problem. "You really are beautifully naïve, Strife. Oh yes, Sephiroth is going to enjoy having your…..company, very much."
My face brightened. "You….You mean….I'm still allowed to go?" I asked, barely able to contain the excitement in my voice.
Commander Zack gave a deep sigh. "Only if…….you put some clothes on first," he laughed. Relief flooded me, and I couldn't help it, I laughed too. Then I caught sight of him looking at the timepiece he wore, and smiling to himself. Glancing instinctively at my digital wall clock, my heart froze in horror. I had barely five minutes to get myself dressed and present myself at the parade ground. And I hadn't even packed my backpack!….
"Excuse me Sir…." I said, hurrying into the bedroom, and tossing everything I needed into the backpack. I didn't care how it went in, just so long as it went in. Then I pulled my clothes on, cussing because I somehow managed to don odd socks, one black and one dark brown. Ah, what the heck. No-one was going to see them anyway. I flicked a comb through my damp hair, giving a quick glance in the mirror. That'll do. Then I dashed back into the room, where Commander Zack was still waiting, to find my boots.
Only, I couldn't find them. Anywhere! Nooooo. I glanced up at the clock again. I was now five minutes late. Commander Zack began chuckling to himself. I looked at him. He was leaning against the wall, his arms folded. And he looked, happy.
"You know…..General Sephiroth hates to be kept waiting. In fact…." he said, looking at me, "I don't think I can recall a single occasion where he has ever waited." Ignoring him, I began frantically searching the room for my boots again. I knew I'd left them by the door last night. I just knew I did. So where the fuck were they? "So it'll be interesting….." he continued, "to see if he's still waiting, when I let you get there." Now I stopped searching, and I looked at him. What the hell did he mean by that……. 'When…I ….let you get there'?
"Sir?….Do you know where my boots are?" I asked, anxiously. He pushed himself away from the wall, and waved an arm dismissively towards the door.
"They stunk….You'll find them outside," he answered nonchalantly. With a gasp of joy, I raced and opened the door. Sure enough, chucked as far as he could throw them down the corridor, were my boots. I ran and brought them back in, sitting on the edge of the bed to put them on, tying up the laces with fumbling fingers. My eyes kept watching the clock. Almost ten minutes late.
"He'll definitely not let you accompany him if he sees the state of this backpack," Commander Zack said, as he up-ended the bag, and tipped all the contents out over the bed. I almost swore, only just managing to refrain from using the F word on my superior officer. Why was he being such a bastard?
"Instead of glaring, don't you think you'd better start repacking?…..Properly Cadet," he cautioned, as I began to lob it all back in haphazardly. I forced myself to slow down, biting my lip to stop myself from throwing an angry retort back at him.
Finally finished, I looked at the clock. I was over fifteen minutes late. There was no way the General would still be waiting for me. But I had to go and see. I had to hope for a miracle. With my heart pounding in my ears, I grabbed the stuffed backpack and headed out the door.
I ran as hard as I could. I was just one corner away from the parade ground, when I heard Commander Zack calling out to me.
"Strife! Cadet Strife…..Haven't you forgotten something?"
Wary of him, I stopped and turned back. He was standing there, holding my jacket in his hands, that damn smile of his still playing about his stupid face. I was torn. Did I go to him and retrieve my clothing from him, or did I just leave it, and present myself onto the parade ground inappropriately dressed. Fuck, I didn't even know if anyone would still be there. But if they were, if General Sephiroth had waited……..I hurried back to the commander, taking my jacket gratefully from his outstretched hands.
"Come here, let me hold onto your backpack while you put it on," he offered, as I fought with the jacket, becoming entangled within the multiple straps and buckles and belts. "You can do the buttons up as we go along," he advised, rumpling and messing up my combed hair with one hand.
Although I knew it was all his fault that I was late, and that I had probably missed out on the chance of a lifetime, I was thankful for his offer of help, and relinquished my hold on the backpack. Finally managing to get my arms into the sleeves of the jacket, I started doing up all the numerous buttons……just as we reached the parade ground.
To my joy of joys, General Sephiroth and his entourage were still there. Someone else must have been late too. But then I felt myself blush. I still wasn't properly dressed yet, I still had a few buttons to fasten. What the hell would he think of me, not only turning up late, but in a state of undress as well?…..I looked down at the few remaining undone buttons, and hastily secured them.
I all but ran the last few steps to him when I was finished. What if he wouldn't let me accompany him now, because of my tardiness and bad presentation?……There was only one way to find out.
"Sir?….I'm sorry for being late Sir….Is it still alright for me to fall in, Sir?"
I looked up at him, my heart thumping in my chest. The General stared back down at me. His face was unreadable, but I could sense there was anger within the man. Someone must have pissed him off before my arrival. Great, now I must have just pushed him over the edge. I waited, holding my breath, dreading to hear the words of rejection I felt were coming.
"Sephiroth….A word." My commanding officer Zack called the General over, and spoke to him. I don't know what was said, but suddenly the General turned to me, throwing my backpack at me.
"You'll be needing this," he said. I couldn't believe it. My commander must have stood up for me. Before I had a chance to thank him, I heard someone calling to me from the ranks of soldiers that were lined up, waiting to leave.
"Strife?…Hey Strife! Over here! I've saved a space for you." I turned, looking at all the faces before me. I didn't know anybody there. Then I saw him, standing amongst the older, taller men, waving his arm and smiling. The boy that liked to play with my buttons.
I didn't know his name, but at least his was a face I recognized. I smiled back, and quickly went to join him. At least I would have a friend while I was on this mission.
The General took his place at the head of the procession….and we were off.