Not Mixed with Nepeta's this time because I thought you guys would appreciate a little cliff hanger 3 Sides, this hit three pages on the last line. Isn't this a treat? You all get two posts in one day! Quick question, does this seem like a self insert? I tried writing in third person but it didn't sound right. So I put it in the style that Homestuck is actually written in. It's not a self insert, not in any way. I hate those stories and if this seems like one that is totally unintentional. Anyway, enjoy the chapter!
xXxXx
Things were not going as you planned. You needed to end this thing with Nepeta, now, before things got out of hand. Waking up from dreams of her with a particular ache between your legs was NOT good thing. That was only supposed to happen for Fef! It couldn't happen for her too!
As you're just about to call her your phone rings. Speak of the devil. You answer, surprised at the sobs on the other line.
"I can't do this anymore Eridan." Her voice sounds weak and full of total sadness. "I'm lying to you and to myself. You're a great guy but I can't lie to you anymore. And I know you were doing the same to me."
You're shocked. You didn't have to do the breaking up, she did it for you. So you agree. And there's a familiar pang in your chest but it's for the wrong person! You can't be sad about your breakup with her. She was using you and you were doing the same to her.
So why are you so sad?
God damn it hurts. You can't stop yourself from curling up in a ball on the couch, trying to sort through your feelings. Okay, so you probably liked her a lot more than you gave yourself credit for. She was just…She was amazing and she actually gave you the time of day. She was interesting and a lot deeper than you had imagined and you couldn't help yourself. It wasn't like you were desperate, you tried your best not to fall in love but it happened.
And now you two had ended your fake relationship. And GOD did it hurt. It hurt worse than with Fef. Speaking of which…
You go on your computer, desperate for someone to talk to. Oh good, Fef is online. You bring up a chat box, immediately spilling all of your feelings and what happened and god is she pissed with you but she also…She understands. You get a message to not go anywhere and a few minutes later she's at our door.
"You're a total idiot Eridan, trying to make me jealous. Frankly you deserve this." She snapped at you at first, then noticed how upset you looked. You were trying your best to hide it, really, but you were ashamed and coming to terms with feelings and this just sucked!
"Eridan…Have you tried to talk to her?" she asked gently, leading you to the couch to sit.
You shake your head no and sigh heavily. "She likes Karkat, I knew that when I got involved with her. Maybe she got asked out by him or somethin'." He said glumly.
Feferi looked shocked. "Eridan, no. Karkat is seeing Terezi now." She said softly.
You blink. That explains it. "Oh gosh…She's heartbroken and decided it was a waste of time bein' with a douche like me now that there was no point…" you say, feeling even worse.
Fef shakes her head and slaps you upside the back of yours. "Talk to her moron. Tell her how you feel. You might be surprised." She said firmly.
You shake your head, disgusted. "No! If I tell her she might feel like she has to settle for me an' I don' do that to her. I'd rather have a broken heart than be with someone that doesn' like me back, wait..." You said, looking shocked. Oh shit.
Fef laughs. "I think we just had a breakthrough for our complicated relationship!" she said, cheery as ever.
You sigh, disgusted with yourself. "I'm such a douchebag." You groan, angry and upset. This fuckin' sucked!
Fef shook her head and stood up. "Eat some glubbing ice cream and have your little pity party and in a few hours try to man up and decide what to do." She said firmly, walking out before you can get a word in edgewise.
So here you are, sitting on the couch and watching some romcoms Karkat recommended to you. You didn't tell him why you wanted to watch them and he didn't ask. It was better that way.
You were in sweats, void of your usual classy style of dress, your hair a mess and a melting bucket of ice cream on your chest. You were going to make yourself feel better damnit! Maybe you'd see if Karkat wanted to get sushi and talk about feelings. Actually, Kanaya was probably a better option at this rate. She wouldn't judge you too harshly and set you straight faster than anyone.
Yeah. That was a great idea! So you call her and in an hour you're dressed (Not well dressed but dressed none the less) and sitting with her in a booth at a sushi bar.
"So, tell me what the problem is." Kanaya asks, looking like a therapist.
You sigh heavily and begin to explain, looking sadder and sadder and ending with: "I know, I'm a fuckin' douche. I used her to get Fef's attention and it didn't work and I tried to reject my feelings for her and I totally deserve this. But she did use me too so I'm not the only one at fault." You say, glad to have gotten all of that off of your chest.
She stares at you for a moment, trying to think of what to say. "Talk to her. I'm not saying ask her out, just tell her how you feel and explain that you understand is she doesn't feel the same but you're there for her none the less, as a friend of course." She said firmly. "And Eridan, you're not as big of a douche as you think. She used you too and you're at the mercy of your emotions." She said softly, trying to reassure you.
You nod and you two eat in silence. Not bad silence though, the good kind where you can be comfortable and not have to try to fill the void with words. Like friends. A tiny ray of hope begins to shine in your chest as you start to think of what you'll do and say to Nepeta.
Suddenly things don't seem so bad.
After your meal you walk back home and go up to your apartment, not noticing the person leaning against the door as you search for your keys.
You look up, your own grey eyes meeting emerald.