Author notes:

To my nameless reviewer, I hear you man, I hear you.

Stupid FF's doc manager keeps swallowing words. If anyone finds a sentence that doesn't make much sense, please let me know and I'll fix it.

I hadn't foreseen how difficult it would be to choose soundtracks for each chapter, it's actually harder than the writing. I wanted a more mysterious tone to this chapter, and finding the perfect song took me foreveerrrr.

…

I do not own Twilight, any of its characters or plot.

Soundtrack of Chapter Four: Massive Attack – "Butterfly Caught"

Staring at the Sun

Chapter Four

"Acceptance"

Bella Swan stared at herself in front of the mirror, immersed in a contemplative mood. Three weeks had passed, her final tests were done and the last day of school was over. She had said goodbye to the friends she had made here, made her promises to stay in touch.

Tonight would be her last night in Phoenix, and though she was no stranger to moving around, she still found herself feeling a mixed sense of dread and nostalgia. Dread for she would tomorrow be moving in with her father, and worse, share a bathroom with him for now on. Nostalgia for Phoenix was a city she deeply adored, even though her stay had barely amounted to a year.

All of her life Bella had believed that her biggest fear was that people would find her boring. After facing the prospect of living indefinitely in Forks, she suddenly realized that being bored actually worried her more. And Forks was the definition of boring.

Bella liked predictability, of course, but that didn´t mean she enjoyed doing the same thing every single day. She had long ago realized that learning new things could keep her grounded, and give her something to focus her more… obsessive propensities on. Nobody knew this, but Bella had never once minded moving around so much; in fact, she all but loved riding the wave of Renee's flightiness, for that meant she could learn something new every day.

While Renee picked things, scrutinized them and nonsensically flicked them away, Bella would dissect them to their last fragment, study each crevice and catalogue it for future reference. It was fantastic. They had been everywhere, done everything from creative dancing and experimental cooking to camping and even firearm shooting (courtesy of Phil).

But now… Now she would be moving away. All alone.

Bella had never been alone before. She actually couldn't remember a time when she wasn't with Renee, Phil or both, filling her mind with new possibilities. Now she would be going away to her father and Bella was slightly worried that living with him would be close to living alone in an isolated village in Alaska. He would just be happy to leave her on her own and go on his merry way. And that could easily go from bad to worse.

All work and no play makes Bella a dull girl.

Bella honestly didn't understand Dr Godricke's reasoning for making her leave, and she had gone through several contemplative sulks over the weeks, trying to figure that out. In the end, after many sessions of meditation, lengthy discussions with Dr Godricke and some not so gentle pushing from her grandmother, Bella had settled somewhere between reluctant acceptance and thoughtful stoicism.

Fighting was futile, she had surmised. Her only consolation was that she would go to Forks over the summer, which would give her time to adapt to the colder seasons.

She sighed, reading herself for bed, meticulously combing her hair, counting each stroke until the glossy strands were shiny and curling at the tips. After that, she dressed in her favorite pajamas, an Evil Dead oversized T-shirt that was mid-thigh long and cotton panties. She then laid down in bed, and closed her eyes, intent on another meditation session.

An indefinite amount of time later Bella opened her eyes again, and instantly realized that she wasn't home. In fact she was nowhere near Phoenix.

She warily looked around, recognizing immediately where she was by the dated and slightly chipped wall painting alone. The chilly temperatures were also dead giveaway.

She was in Forks. More precisely, she was in her father's living room.

She noticed him sleeping in his favorite reclining chair, snoring lightly as some sports show on TV made discreet noises in the background.

Frowning deeply, seriously worrying that she might have somehow had some sort of memory lapse (If that, then for how long?), she slowly got up and covered her father with a blanket that adorned the couch, to ward off the chilly temperatures.

She silently made her way out of the living room, fully intending on going up the stairs and freaking out in private in her room, but as she passed the kitchen entrance, she she noticed a pile of newspapers at the table. The date on the paper was the same as she remembered it being today, she sighed in relief. Ok, so no memory lapses then. Maybe … she was sleeping? ?

That made sense, she thought as she sat down in one of the kitchen chairs.

Bella had been thinking about Forks before she went to bed, so it was only expected that she would dream about it. She hoped it wouldn't be a nightmare though, she wasn't exactly thinking good things about this tedious little town before she went to sleep.

She waited for a while and nothing happened, which made Bella wonder if this really was a nightmare, one in which she would walk around, for hours on end, utterly bored (her worst fear… dang, why had she given that information up again?). She seriously hoped it wasn't a nightmare, but fearing it might be so, she decided to get up and just get it over with.

She walked around the kitchen only to notice the kitchen door slightly ajar. She snorted, thinking how it really was a dream, for if there was something Charlie was obsessed with it definitely was locking the doors before going to slumber. She decided to go outside and just face the dream world shaped as the woods behind her father's house.

The first thing she noticed was that she was not alone outside. The second thing was that her companions were all lined along the tree line, eerily looking back at her. The third thing was that they were all dead.

Great, she was having an undead themed nightmare.

She silently waited for a Freddy Krueger like creature to appear and try to kill her, but again, nothing happened. People just kept staring back at her. She had recognized them instantly: Sarah Black and Quil Ateara IV, Granpa Geoff and Granma Helen, they all just kept staring at her, as if awed, unbelieving of her presence.

'What the heck', Bella thought. 'Might as well go with the flow', she thought as she decided it wouldn't hurt to maybe like…go to them and…talk?

'Hey, so what is it like on the other side? Eternal peace in a sandy beach? Anything else like… just maybe more fun than hijacking kids dreams?' she thought to herself mockingly, but was surprised as the four suddenly cracked similar amused smiles. Could they hear her mind?

Oh boy… Definitely starting to look like a nightmare.

She warily approached the tree line but suddenly forgot all about the deceased people as she became aware of intense heat blooming in her chest, suddenly feeling the searing blades of fire she had long became accustomed to.

Startled, she heaved a deep breath as she noticed the outline of a massive form just beyond the tree line. The sudden feeling of invisible claws gnawing at her heart pulled her forward, forcing her to step closer to the tree line. The dead people looked at her fondly as she dazedly approached them, Helen lightly caressing one curl of her granddaughter's hair, Sarah reaching out and softly running a ghostly hand along Bella's left arm. They all murmured words so soft that she could barely understand, but one phrase she heard:

"He is here."

Tears ran down Bella's eyes as she nodded.

She could feel the magnificent being opening his eyes, the smoldering yellow flames immediately locking onto her own gaze.

Everything else just faded away.

…

"Bella?"

She heard his voice before she became aware of herself.

"Sleep walking again, baby?"

She was still in her pajamas, barefoot, stepping on the grass at the backyard of her house, looking up at the moon, tear tracks still fresh on her cheeks.

"How did you get outside? I locked the doors myself. Is your sleep-walking side getting sneakier?" she sensed the humor in his voice, felt the touch of a hand at the small of her back.

"Come on, baby. Wake up. I have a surprise for you." The hand at her back gently steered her back inside the house.

"Go change clothes now. We can't be late." She obeyed him, dully, as he steered her upstairs.

"Phil?" She asked, still dazed.

"Hm?" It was still very dark, she could barely see his face. He rubbed gentle circles over her lower back as he helped her upstairs.

"Did I wake you up?" she murmured as she entered her room and sat on her bed, dazedly pulling on leggings per his request. He was leaning at the door, silent, watching her. She made to take of her shirt, torpidly thinking about changing into another one, but he stopped her by tenderly holding her arms down.

"You didn't. I just … always know when you are around." He murmured, letting go of her arms. In fact, he had known the exact second that she stepped out of the house. "Keep the shirt on, it looks comfortable." He murmured as he got down to one knee and silently strapped sandals unto her feet. After he got up and pulled Bella up and over to him, embracing her softly, again rubbing gentle circles on her back. He rested his chin on top of her head and sighed.

"Are you awake now?" he asked.

"Why are we leaving at three in the morning?" she asked as she chanced a look at her alarming clock, checking the time. "Does mom know we are leaving?"

"You are questioning me. Good! That means you are awake." Phil smiled his trademark crooked half smile as he let go of her head and looked into her eyes. "Your mom is asleep, and no, she doesn't know we are leaving. Do you trust me?"

"Of course I do." She murmured as he slipped a lock of her hair behind her right ear.

"Then let's go."

…

"Why are you doing this to me?"

A sigh.

"This is not about you. It has never been. You know that."

Phil Dwyer clenched his hands in agitation, staring at the placid man in front of him. His 5´6 frame, light brown hair cropped short, his outfit of blue jeans and a pale blue shirt, both frayed with wear. One would not immediately sense an ounce of threat coming from this man, unless one was to stare into his eyes. The same soulless eyes that stared back at Phil, unblinkingly.

The man smiled, something that always put Phil on edge.

"You were sent there to watch over, to supervise. Certainly not to care. Do you… care, Phillip? Have you finally found someone to protect ?"

Phil narrowed his eyes, sneering at him. He was wary, but decided to be humor him, for once. "Yes, I do. I…have."

The man's smiled widened considerably, contorting his face into a somewhat inhuman expression, his unblinking eyes focusing exclusively on him. Phil fervently wished the other one had shown up to talk to him; at least she pretended some humanity still.

"Wrong," the man spoke lowly, approaching him menacingly. "You care, yes, that you do, you love, I can feel that. But do not think you can fool me, boy. You have not found someone to protect, you have found someone who protects you."

Phil gave a step back, startled. His widened eyes sought the gaze of the man - monster - in front of him. So, they knew.

They knew about him.

They knew about her.

He clenched his fist, enraged. He'd been played from the start.

Unblinking eyes continued their unsettling stare. "Bring her to me," the man said. "I want to give her birthday gift, as I will not be able to see her again so soon."

A little over 24 hours later and Phil Dwyer found himself, at 3 in the morning, driving his precious cargo around town. She'd dozed off at the passenger seat, so fully trusting of him that it made his heart ache.

They arrived at their destination, the Desert Botanical Garden, an actual garden, full of neatly arranged cactuses, glass sculptures and thousands of butterflies. It was Bella´s most favorite place on the world, Phil knew and so did they.

Phil took Bella out of the car and carried her inside, in his arms, still asleep. He passed the already unconscious (hopefully not murdered) security guards and headed inside. As he found himself surrounded by artfully arranged glowing glass sculptures and spindly prickly flora, he allowed himself a moment of enjoying the blend of nature and human creativity, until he arrived at the Butterfly Pavillion.

He couldn't hide his surprise in seeing them, even after all these years. The man now smiled more sedately, eyeing his dear cargo and the woman, brilliant and seductive in her beauty, eyed too the girl fondly, and motioned for Phil to accommodate her in a comfortable booth.

He did as he was told, silent and gentle, lest he awakened Bella. The couple kneeled in front of her, as Phil walked away, torn, clenching his hands so hard that his fingernails dug into his palms, nearly drawing blood.

The couple murmured sweet nothings that Phil could not understand, sometimes they softly brushed her hair, others they lightly caressed her features. After an eternity, to him at least, the couple got up and approached Phil with an almost feline pace of perfect, lethal steps, all the while focusing their inhuman gazes at him.

The man held his hand out, showing Phil something he cradled in his hand: a tiny, tiny cactus plant, with a little blue flower yet to blossom on top of it. "The gift," the man said, not elaborating further. Phil held out his hands, taking the miniscule plant to himself, thinking it was actually a great gift to Bella. She would love it.

"Wake her when we are gone." The woman's soprano voice reverberated through him. "We will dispose of the guards, your way out will be clear. Nevertheless, do not linger here."

Phil again did as he was told, marveling at the little things like Bella's glowing smile when he gave her the tiny plant. She truly adored her new gift, and promised to care for it deeply. They trolled around for a while, Bella pleasantly surprised at being able to say goodbye to her favorite place in Phoenix.

Later when they were back home, Phil actually tucked her in. She thought it was the funniest thing and told him to tuck in the new cactus too, so he would feel welcome.

"He?" Phil questioned, amused.

Bella yawned deeply. "It feels like a he, don't you think?" she said as she made herself comfortable under the covers. Phil lifted one eyebrow, amused. "Sure, why not? Tomorrow we can pick his name", he said.

Bella smiled sleepily but held his hand as he tried to get up. He looked at her as he sat back down, and she cupped his left cheek with one hand.

"Are you gonna be okay when I leave?"

Phil swallowed thickly. No, he wouldn't, but there was nothing he could do about it. Not yet, at least. So, of course, he opted on lying.

"Don't be silly, of course I am", he huffed, dismissing her words.

"You're lying", she ousted him, still smiling, trying to hide a yawn. "But that's okay… I don't expect you to tell me all your secrets."

…

At the next morning Charlie Swan found himself frowning deeply, staring at the opened kitchen door right in front of him. The same door he most distinctly remembered locking the night before.