DISCLAIMER:

I own the Rights to my imagination if nothing else on this page I suppose.

(You know the rest so I ain't gonna paste the full disclaimer on again because you should know by now that nobody so far

is my own invention they all belong to well known authors.)

Susan's New LifePart Four: It was the House that Death built.

He had a lot to explain and Susan knew it could not wait.

As soon as she found her voice she began, "What is going on?" when he didn't answer she tried again, "You aren't really

Death, are you?" still no reply, "Where are we going?"

TO MY HOUSE OF COURSE.

"You Death aren't you?"

PEOPLE CALL ME MANY THINGS, BUT TECHNICALLY NO MATTER WHAT THEY CALL ME; YES, I AM DEATH.

"Why was I the only one who saw you properly?"

BECAUSE SUSAN ONLY WITCHES AND WIZARDS FROM MY DOMAINS CAN SEE ME AS I TRULY AM.

"That doesn't make sense, what domains? My step-parents are magic."

SUSAN, SUSAN, SUSAN, ALL OF THIS CAN WAIT.

"No I want answers know!"

CAN IT NOT WAIT UNTIL WE ARRIVE?

NO, NOW ANSWER ME NOW GRANDFATHER! Susan said angrily then she gasped at the words she'd said.

YOU REALLY ARE THE DAUGHTER OF MORT AND YSABELL. NOW REST YOUR THROAT AND I PROMISE I WILL EXPLAIN

EVERYTHING AT DINNER.

Susan was too confused to reply anyway.

They touched down in Death's domain with a jerk. Startled Susan looked around her.

Everything was black. A million different shades of Black. It made her eyes hurt just thinking about it. This was were Death

stayed. More memories flooded her head as they walked side by side up the long grey paved drive. The endless rooms, the

bad plumbing.

WELCOME TO MY HOUSE SUSAN. Death said as the door opened by it's self; FOLLOW ME WE HAVE A LOT TO TALK ABOUT

BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY FOR YOU A LOT TO ASK.

"Yes we do."

Death brought her into his office. SIT.

Susan sat on a black high back chair that was placed to the side of Death's table. Death sat on his chair behind the desk

and swivelled around to face her. ASK ME ANYTHING.

"OK, why am I here?"

BECAUSE I ASKED IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO STAY AND YOU ACCEPTED. SO WE ARE HERE.

"Where is here exactly?"

THE DISCWORLD.

"Where is it because I know my geography and it isn't in Europe or America?"

THE DISCWORLD IS NOT ON EARTH! IT IS A FLAT WORLD ON THE BACK OF 4 ELEPHANTS WHICH STAND ON THE BACK OF A

GIANT TURTLE WHICH HURTLES THROUGH SPACE.

"But that is impossible!"

NO IT IS QUITE POSSIBLE. BELIEVE ME I SHOULD KNOW.

"How is it that you are my grandfather? Who were my parents?"

YOUR PARENTS WERE THE DUKE AND DUCHESS OF STO HELIT. WHICH IS A SMALL CITY ON THE STO PLAINS.

"What do you mean? My dad and mum were a duke and a duchess. But how?"

SUSAN I WANT YOU TO LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY AND DO NOT INTERRUPT ME. Death said gravely.

WHEN YOUR MOTHER WAS SMALL HER PARENTS DIED LEAVING HER BEHIND. I TOOK HER AND UNOFFICALLY ADOPTED HER

AS MY OWN. I RAISED HER HERE. THEN I WENT SEARCHING FOR AN APPRENTICE AND FOUND MORT. THEY FELL IN LOVE AND

GOT MARRIED SO I LET THEM GO BACK INTO THE REAL WORLD. THEY HAD JUST SAVED THE LIFE OF THE QUEEN OF STO LAT

SO SHE MADE THEM THE NEW DUKE AND DUCHESS OF STO HELIT. (AS A THANK YOU I SUPPOSE.) HOWEVER WHEN YOU

WERE AROUND THE AGE OF 7 THEY BOTH DIED IN A CAR CRASH. YOU WERE TO BECOME THE NEW DUCHESS AND UNTIL YOU

CAME OF AGE THE CITY WAS TO BE RUN BY Q UEEN KELI BUT I TOOK YOU OUT OF TIME AND BACK TO MY HOUSE FOR A

WHLE. YOU WERE NOT AS HAPPY AS I WOULD HAVE LIKED YOU TO BE, SO I SET OUT TO FIND YOU ADOPTIVE PARENTS WHO

WOULD NOT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR STRANGE ANCESTRY BUT WHO COULD TEACH YOU ABOUT THE OCCULT AND

MAGIC. I FOUND THE BONES' AND A SCHOOL FOR WITCHCRAFT AND HOWEVER DIFFERENT IT WAS FROM MAGIC ON THE

DISC IT WAS BETTER THAN THE ALTERNATIVE BECAUSE YOUR PAENTS HAD PUT YOUR NAME DOWN TO ATTEND A GIRLS

COLLEGE IN QUIRM BUT I DID NOT LIKE ITS CURRICULUM. JUST BEFORE YOUR 8TH BIRTHDAY YOU MOVED IN WITH THE

BONES' AND THE REST IS HISTORY. (AS SUCH)

As Death finished Susan let his words sink in.

"So I am a Duchess," it was not a question but Death answered it anyway.

NOT YET, NOT UNTIL YOU REACH THE AGE OF 17 AND EVEN THEN YOU WON'T GET YOUR FULL INHERITANCE UNTIL THE AGE OF 21.

"That voice I did earlier I shouldn't have been able to do it but I did. How did I do it and why could I do it?" Susan asked

cautiously. genetics

AH, GENETICS ON THE DISC CAN BE PASSED ON VIA THE SOUL. I AM AFRAID IT IS ONE OF MANY TRAITS YOU WILL FIND YOU

HAVE INHERITED FROM ME AS YOU GROW OLDER.

Susan looked shocked. Death continue, FOR INSTANCE YOU CAN WALK AROUND AND OPEN DOORS SLIENTLY AND NO-ONE

NOTICES YOU UNLESS YOU WANT THEM TO. CORRECT?

"Yes, but..."

YOU ALSO LOOK AROUND THIS ROOM AND SEE IT AS IT REALLY IS; AN ENDLESS SPACE; WHEREAS ALBERT COMES IN HERE

AND ONLY SEES A SMALL CRAMPED ROOM. YOU MY DEAR SEE WHAT IS REALLY HERE WHICH IS A LOT HARDER THAN SEEING

WHAT IS NOT HERE BECAUSE EVERYONE CAN DO THAT.

"You said that witchcraft is different here from witchcraft back home. How?"

WITCHES HERE DO NOT WAVE A PIECE OF WOOD AROUND AND SAY FUNNY WORDS INSTEAD THEY WAVE THEIR HANDS AND

CURSE UNDER THEIR BREATH A LOT. A MAJOR PART OF BEING A WITCH ON THE DISC IS THE USE OF HEADOLOGY AND

BORROWING TOO. THEY USE HERBS DIFFERENTLY AND IF YOU WANT WE CAN GO AND SEE SOME OF THEM TOMORROW?

THEY MOSTLY LIVE IN LANCRE SO WE CAN STOP BY ON MY ROUNDS.

"But I have met lots of powerful witches before."

BUT NEVER WITCHES FROM THE DISC. Death stated.

"OK, tomorrow we can go and meet a real witch." Susan relented; "but I still have more questions."

LET US TALK OVER DINNER THEN. Death said standing up and walking towards the door.

"What is this Albert person making?"

I DO NOT KNOW BUT IF YOU WOULD PREFER A CURRY IT CAN BE ARRANGED. THERE IS A NICE PLACE BACK IN

ANKH-MORPORK.

"Ankh-Morpork?"

YES IT IS THE BIGGEST TWIN CITY ON THE DISC.

"I can't really remember the last time I had a good curry now that you mention it." Susan commented as they moved into

the dinning room.

They ended up going to The Curry Gardens because Albert's cooking was only for the extremely needy and Susan found

that she could not make herself eat the food on her plate. Death gave a very good description of curry she thought as she

ate her chicken curry, even though for the life of her she could not see how he could eat without a stomach or an

oesophagus. Still when they returned to the dreary country house, Susan was too tired to complain that her bed seemed a

bit hard. Ankh-Morpork had took it out of her.

Next time... Susan meets a Discworld witch. Has Granny Weatherwax meet her match...

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