Title: Life Among the Ashes
Author: taramidala
Rating: PG-13
Time Frame: Immediately post "Revenge of the Sith." Inter-trilogy AU.
Acknowledgements: Thanks to ginchy, salanderjade, lotusflower85, and SerendipityAEY for the beta reading.
Disclaimer: All belongs to Lucasfilm and the Disney Corporation, except for two original characters briefly mentioned.
Note: I'm the fanfiction equivalent of George Lucas. I can't leave well enough alone. Sabé demanded some attention, so she got it. Here's her version of the story.
Part 2: Sabé. Chapter 4.
Four Years Later (14 BBY)
There had been an incident with the children, so now she stands in wait for a transport that carries him back to her.
This wasn't the way she wanted to meet him again. But the Princess, and 'Ryah…the Queen and Senator had begged her to ask for his help. He was the only one. Olin had long disappeared and any others, if there were any others still, remained rightly hidden from view.
So now, it'd be up to 'Ryah's father to ensure that she and Sabé's charge remained safely anonymous.
The throng of refugees that disembark passes by her shadowed hiding place, and there's no sign of him. Her fists grasp and twist in her skirts until, at last, he is there, cloaked and hooded in the crowd. Darting into the swarm, she seizes him in silence and whisks him away to the palace. There's no official greeting from the royal family, no formal audience to be held. A secret visitor in a public space.
The door to her quarters slides closed and they are alone. His presence hangs heavily behind her, his uncertainty bleeding into her heart as if her own. In the silence she almost hears him whisper her name, just as he's done in her dreams.
"'béa…"
His eyes shine with that familiar twinkle as she enters his arms, and when he kisses her all her fears wash away. His visit wasn't prompted by danger with the children, but by his need to be with her and 'Ryah.
The sad truth brings them back to reality as they fall together to divan, but neither says a word. For the moment, all she wants is to rest in his arms a moment. Let the troubles outside her door wait a while longer.
It's not trouble that interrupts the soothing silence but the cheerful cry of "Mamai!" from 'Ryah who bounds into Sabé's lap. Sabé eyes Obi-Wan as he observes the scene, pouring over every inch of the girl he left behind. His eyes widen in wonder and his face blossoms to complete openness and love. And when 'Ryah greets him in Sabé's native tongue, "Hello, Ah'da," Sabé's heart clenches with pride.
Later, when she takes him to bed beside her, they speak in hushed tones of the Force, the children, and the reason for his visit. Between lingering reintroductions of hands, lips, and bodies, Sabé details the terrifying moment 'Ryah and the Princess joined minds and toppled a totem in a palace courtyard. 'Ryah believed they'd done it together, for she'd 'felt' the princess 'in her mind.' Queen and Consort covered for both girls, thankfully, dismissing the incident on faulty fixtures, however it had set fear deeper into their hearts for Leia, who had no apparent knowledge of what she'd done. Since then, they'd had the children separated and monitored constantly, but even that was not a deterrent. The Princess and 'Ryah were unconsciously connecting in ways they couldn't control. In another lifetime they could dismiss the mischief as typical childhood behavior, but now…
Obi-Wan sighs heavily at the news. He'll have to reinforce the Princess' natural shields, he says, and explain to Taryah her "little games" are not for sharing. Sabé wonders how he'll manage that to a child of four; he kisses her fears away for the moment, and his trademark calm and care wash over her as they drift off into sleep. Their worries can wait until tomorrow.
Four Years Later (10 BBY)
Sabé looks down at the child draped head-to-toe in lightweight wraps, who whines softly, "Mamai, I'm too hot." She tells herself - again - that this is a bad idea, that they shouldn't be here. Yet her heart, which breaks every time 'Ryah cries for her father in the dead of night, compels her to find him.
She prays he's where she left him. If only they can get there.
"Soon, dearest," she says, as much to her daughter as to herself. "Come."
They make their way from the docking bay where they've left the ship through the crowded port streets. It's as seedy as Sabé remembered, and she clutches 'Ryah's hand a little tighter as she tries to find the dealer from whom Ben had purchased their speeder years ago. She doesn't have much to barter with this time 'round, all her money being Imperial credits which won't go far on this barren removed world.
After three stops, she resigns herself to the fact that the first dealer has disappeared, and offers what she can to the next one she sees. The creature snickers and rakes its eyes over her, filling her gut with revulsion at the slobbering and slithering. She's about to open her mouth to protest its indecisiveness, when –
"Where you come from, girl?" it asks.
When she lies and says "Mos Espa," she's quickly caught, for her stated destination – Bestine – lie halfway between the two ports. The menace circles them, sniffing. Sabé yanks a shaking 'Ryah against her, hugging the little one to her chest.
There's an offer – a speeder for 'Ryah – that sends her into a rage as hot as the desert sun itself.
"Never," she spits.
"Mamai?" 'Ryah whimpers.
The creature slinks close once more, wrapping it's claws around 'Ryah's arm. On instinct, Sabe begins to pull away, but the dealer also holds firm. Her heart's in her throat now; her mind racing to fashion an escape. Panic sets in, and there's no one who would help them, not in this place, and –
"You will let them go," a soft, firm voice resonates from behind her. "You will walk away, and you will never speak of this to anyone."
He doesn't wait for her to exhale, but spirits them both away to a nearby alley. His anger is palpable through his silence, yet his visible disbelief at her reason – that Taryah simply wanted to see him – only strengthens her resolve.
"She dreams of the desert and she calls for you at night. Am I to ignore that?" she asks.
She's waiting for his answer when 'Ryah interrupts their argument. "Ah'da…" the girl trails off softly. They both track the girl's eyes to the distant figure she's spotted: a child, a boy, stone-still and resisting the tugs of his guardian. Even from where she stands, his bright blue eyes blaze at them, at 'Ryah, whose face widens in wonder.
"Mamai, who's that?" 'Ryah asks.
He stifles a gasp and her eyes flick over to his. Oh,no… "No one, dearest," she says. "Why?"
The girl rubs her head the way she first did when the Princess unknowingly discovered her power. "He feels like me. Up here."
Obi-Wan drops to his knees and takes 'Ryah's hands between his. All the distress and ire wash away the moment he meets the girl's eyes, so like his own. "Taryah, I need you to listen to me. This is very important. Do you remember what I said to you about your brain games?"
She nods.
"You mustn't play them, not ever. Do you understand?"
She nods again.
"It is dangerous. You could be hurt, and your mother and I would be very sad. Do you understand?"
Another nod.
"Good. Now focus on me and clear your mind. Release your thoughts and think them no more. We should go."
"Where, Ah'da?" 'Ryah asks.
"Home."
Sabe smiles at that, and takes her daughter's hand while Obi-Wan takes the other. As he leads them to the outskirts of the city, where he's parked the same speeder they'd bought so many years earlier, she watches 'Ryah take in the sight of her birthworld. Its golden dunes match her hair, some of which has escaped her headwrap. As they settle 'Ryah into the seat between them, Sabé reaches out to brush back a stray blonde curl.
'Ryah's face seems to turn reflective as her father starts up the vehicle. "Ah'da, does anything grow here?" she asks.
"Of course, but it's very difficult," Obi-Wan says.
"Why?"
"Because it requires a great deal of patience. Time. And hope."
"I hope something grows here soon," 'Ryah says. "It's awfully yellow."
Something did, Sabé thinks.
Six Years Later (4 BBY)
"Sabé," he sighs. She flinches at the word, so unfamiliar now on his lips. Its use signals his intent, to invoke her duty. Their duty. The duty to which they'd agreed so many years ago, that when the time arrived…
"We need her to be ready," he says. "You always knew it would come to this."
A swirl of rage bubbles in her stomach, whirling around like a scorching breeze. They've been avoiding this conversation for days, dancing around each other and their daughter like this was just another visit.
"You want to take my child, strip her of all that remains of her childhood, to live Force knows where, by herself, just because –"
"Taryah was never part of the plan."
"Then leave her out of it!" she shouts. The hurt and regret and anger within her crests over her heart, and she prays he can feel it. "I don't care what 'instructions' you've been given. Why should I do what the revered Master says? Why should I, when I can't forget what happened the last time he took a child away from his family and tried to strip him of all that made him human? You shouldn't forget that, either. She's your daughter, too."
"Sabé, it's too late. We need her."
"It isn't," she tries again, pounding at his chest
He coaxes her into his arms and buries his face into her hair as she weeps. Everything pours forth from her now: the years of pain she's endured because of what they've been asked to give up for the safety of others. Because of the destruction of a family that never really had the chance to be.
After a long moment she subsides, her shuddering shoulders stilling under his hands. When she looks up to his eyes, she sees the same gaze he gave her fourteen years ago when their child represented all their hopes and fears and dreams. There's sadness there, regret aplenty, and also determination that she knows she can't fight and win.
Still, she has to try, just one last tactic. "If she must be trained, then train them all."
"We can't. Not yet. It's not the right time. Please don't ask me to explain."
She opens her mouth to reply when a subdued voice echoes from the entry to her suite. "It's all right, Mother. I'll go," 'Ryah says, although Sabé hears doubt and apprehension in her tone. "If Father says it's important, then it must be."
Sabé looks at her daughter, then to the man who co-created her. The stricken look his gray-blue eyes tells her all she needs to know. That this man, too, had lost something along their journey together, and he knows it now. He's thinking of it, too – of that time when everything was broken-but-beautiful. Of when the young woman before them represented hope in a dark place. Perhaps she still did. And with time, and training, she'll give that hope to others, and save some for herself.
Sabe opens her arms to 'Ryah and accepts the girl into an embrace. 'Ryah dips her head into her mother's neck and sighs. Sabé doesn't need the Force to know this child is scared.
She spears Obi-Wan with another look. "You bring her back to me," she says. "When this is over, you send her back."
"He will. I promise."
It's not perfect, but like much of their lives, together and apart, it will have to be enough.
Four Years Later (0 BY)
'Ryah collapses under the weight of a million deaths. All Sabé can do is take the girl in her arms.
She's a crumpled pile of tears, overwhelmed by something she doesn't understand, until her body freezes and she stands. They must fight on.
When Taryah takes her hand, she feels it, too. The tender, calm light of his presence.
His voice will echo in her memory forever. We have our destinies. I'm sorry. I will always be with you.