Chapter Four
Over the course of the next few days, Lily didn't see Severus much. She always seemed to wake up after he went down to the lab and went to bed before he came out of the lab at night. She managed to make sure he ate at least, making soup and levitating it to him in order to avoid the fumes from the potion which might be harmful to her baby. Still she hadn't really seen him leave the lab at all and it was beginning to worry her.
She sat in an armchair facing the door to the potions lab, reading from one of Severus' potion manuals. She watched as the door opened and Severus came through it, holding a glass full of a potion. He looked terrible and Lily went over to him at once. "Are you okay Sev?"
"I'm fine Lily, I'm more then fine! I finished it, here." He said and handed her the glass, she looked at it for a moment, before downing it wincing at the taste.
"It tastes horrid." Lily said and stared at her stomach as is started to glow. The glowing only lasted a moment before fading. Harry then started to kick her a few times, she set her hand on her belly and stroked it gently. "Its alright Harry love, Mummy and Daddy are here." She said and gave Severus a brilliant smile. "Thank you Sev, because of you my Harry is safe." She said and wrapped her arms around him, before giving him a kiss on the cheek. "I want you to be a part of Harry's life."
"I wouldn't know how to raise a child Lily, I did this to ensure that Potter could never touch you again."
"You are not your father Severus, you are a good man. I am not asking you to raise our son, mearly to be a part of his life." Lily said and Severus nodded stiffly.
"I suppose I could do that, it would not be hard to be a better fath- role model to him then my own father was to me."
"You are Harry's father now, you have every right to claim him as your son." Lily said and Severus smiled slightly, he had always wanted a child with Lily growing up. Now however he felt daunted at the thought of another being being so dependent upon him. "It will be fine Sev, you will see...Now come and sit down, you look like you could do with a cuppa."
"I really should get started on the potion that will make you go into labor early."
"Just have a cuppa with me first, then you can get back to your potions alright?"
"Alright." He said and sat in one of the armchairs, she smiled at him, before going into the kitchen. She had been worried about Sev and so had stopped by an apothecary to get a sweet sleep potion. She knew Sev would work himself into exhaustion, if he had his way. So she had decided to help him in the only way she could. She heated the water with a spell and put the tea bags in the pot.
"Sev, I like my tea with milk and honey, would that be alright with you?"
"That sounds fine Lily, thank you." Severus replied and she added some of the sleeping potion to one of the cups along with a spoon filled part way with honey. She then took another spoon out for her own tea. She took out the teabags and poured the tea, before stirring it. She then cast a spill proof charm over Severus' cup and headed into the living room, she handed the cup to Severus and sat down across from him. She sipped at her own tea as Severus yawned and his eyes drooped.
"I must be more tired then I thought." He said and yawned again.
"You aren't in any shape to be brewing like that, come and lie down for a bit Sev." Lily said gently. "You will feel better after a bit of sleep." She smiled at him.
"I should drink this and get back to the potion." He said and Lily sighed.
"I can't change your mind?" She asked and he shook his head, she sighed and went back to drinking her tea. Severus took another few sips, before his eyes closed and he started to snore. Lily gently took the cup from his hands and levitated him onto the couch, knowing that he would sleep for several hours. She sat with his head in her lap and gently stroked back his hair. He clearly had applied enough potion protecter to it, as it hung limply. She cast a spell to remove the potion from his hair and gently stroked it, he sighed contentedly and she smiled. She summoned one of Severus' books to her and started to read it. An hour later, she felt a wave of tiredness, her eyes closed and she fell asleep. The book fell onto Severus' chest, when she dropped it.
Severus didn't stir for four hours, he opened his eyes and stared up at a mane of red hair and Lily fast asleep. He smiled ruefully, tasting the sleeping serum in his mouth and chuckling slightly at the thought that his sweet Lily had thought to drug him. Had it been anyone else, he would have been furious, but Lily never did anything duplicitus and he knew that it had been concern for him that had motivated her to do so. He had to admit that he did in fact feel much better then he had, before his impromptu nap. He got up slowly, as not to wake her and gently laid her down on the couch in his place. He then walked back into the lab and started to brew his next project.
Lily found him there when she woke up. "Sev you have got to stop being so single minded, its not that I don't appreciate it...But you are hurting yourself."
"Lily leave me to brew, you need this potion and I will insure that you get it. It is not necessary, nor is it needed for you to drug me. I assure you that I will endeavor to sleep more in the future." He said and Lily glared back at him.
"It was necessary, its obvious that you didn't sleep for long enough and that you have not been sleeping these past few days."
"I am a grown man and you are not my mother Lily."
"I may not be your mother, but I am your friend and I care that you are hurting yourself." Lily said. "If I have to spike your tea to insure that you catch more then a few moments sleep, I will. I assure you that I will do whatever necessary to insure that you are taking care of yourself. Sev, why can't you seem to understand that I care about you?"
"Why? Because as of a few days ago, you did not talk to me for over five years." Severus said.
"That was not because I stopped caring Severus, but rather because I thought that you would not me to talk to you."
"Why would you think that Lily, when you were my only friends."
"Friends do not call their friends horrible names."
"Well maybe if you can not forgive me for something done in anger five years ago, perhaps we are not friends." He said and Lily moved towards him. "NO! Do not come closer, the fumes might harm the child." He said.
"I am sorry Severus, I am sorry that I doubted you. I thought that you had found other friends in your own house and did not need me anymore." Lily said and Severus sneered.
"Oh really, or perhaps you didn't care. After all when has anyone genuinely cared for me?"
"I do care Severus..."
"Ah yes, but is that true feeling for me that you have, or is it how I might serve you?" Severus demanded.
"Severus how could you ask that? I have never asked anything of you..."
"You have not needed to, you need merely bat those green eyes of yours and I come running for more punishment." Severus said and Lily stared at him.
"You think of me as a punishment? Well then Mr. Snape, I will not be bothering you anymore." Lily said and started to storm away.
"Lily wait, Lily please come back, don't leave me alone again." It was not the voice that had come out in their fight, nor the demeanor he had shown towards her for these past days. Instead it was the voice of a child, plaintive and heart rending. Lily turned around and saw Severus standing over his cauldron. He was not crying, Severus never cried, yet to Lily who had known him well for years, it was obvious that he was distressed.
"I do not see why you want me to stay, but I will. After all, where else would I go? I am sorry that I argued with you Severus...You have been nothing but kind to me for the last few days and I repaid you by drugging you. I only did it out of worry for you, but I understand now that it was wrong of me. You know too well that once I get an idea in my head, I don't tend to let go of it easily." Lily said and Severus snorted, before adding an ingredient to the potion.
"That's one way of putting it." Severus said and sighed, before tapping his fingers against the stirring stick. "I know you were worried about me Lily, I am afraid that my temper gets rather short when I don't sleep well. I shall attempt to insure that I will allow myself to sleep, when the potion needs to brew for a while."
"Thank you Severus, I don't want you to harm yourself on my account." She said and he nodded stiffly.
"I will take better care of myself, if you do the same. You haven't been getting enough sleep either Lily. Not nearly enough to replenish yourself, from helping your son to build his own magical core."
"I will sleep more." Lily agreed. "If we are done with this conversation for now, what would you like to eat?"
"Whatever you prepare is fine, I should be able to help with more of the meals after the potion finishes brewing." He said and Lily nodded.
"I will see you in a little while then Severus." Lily said and went into the kitchen, she saw that she didn't really have any of the necessary ingredients for making any kind of soup and she didn't want to go to the store either. She wound up looking through the cupboards and found a can of tomato soup. She opened it and put it into a pot, stirring it gently until it started to bubble. She turned it off of the heat and poured some of the soup into a cup. She carried it to Severus' lab and levitated it to him.
"Thank you Lily." Severus said and Lily nodded.
"I will have to go to the grocery store soon, we are almost out of food." Lily said and he nodded in return.
"I will busy with the potion for the next week or two, depending upon how easy it is to brew." Severus said. "I can not accompany you to the store and you will have to go by yourself. You will find some pounds in the jar in the living room."
"Thank you Severus." Lily said before leaving, neither one of them got over a fight easily. They both were the type to pretend things were fairly normal. Until they could no longer avoid their anger, or that anger passed for a while. However that same anger increased in the interim.
Lily walked back to the kitchen, sat down and ate her soup. She cleaned up the pot and the bowl before going back to the library and sitting down with a book. She read for a time, before she saw the door to the potion lab open and Severus stepped out.
"I need to get some ingredients, I will be back soon." Severus assured her and she nodded, before returning to her book, thinking nothing of the conversation until several hours had passed and Severus had not returned. She began to worry for him, before Severus apparated into the living room shaking slightly. She rushed over to him and helped him to a chair.
"I have B-been away t-ta-too long. I na-need to ga-get back ta-to the pa-potion." Severus shuddered.
"Its only been a few hours Severus, your health comes first." Lily told him and summoned several potions to her, she forced them down Severus' throat. "He used the cruciatus curse on you, didn't he?" Lily asked. "Don't speak Severus, just nod if he did." Severus nodded and Lily's eyes welled up with tears, she continued to force feed him potions and handed him a glass of water, which he took shakily and drank.
"Thank you Lily, I feel much better now." Severus said and tried to stand, before shakily sitting back down. "I will be up in a minute."
"Sev, you need to rest, you were just tortured, it is alright you can work on the potion later."
"No I can't, it requires a certain phase of the moon." Severus said and took a deep breath before standing once more and walking back to the potions lab.
"That stupid stubborn man!" Lily said and glared at the door. "Severus whatever you may think, you are not invincible." She sighed, she couldn't read and she didn't have anything else to do currently. She wished that she had thought to bring something to distract her, Molly Weasley had taught her how to knit a year before, as she prepared for her own baby. Lily had seen a picture of the infant Ron Weasley and had been hoping to meet him soon, before everything had happened. She decided that it would be better to go shopping then to drive herself crazy by sitting and reading for too long. She loved reading, but she preferred to read spell books rather then potions manuals and Severus' collection consisted of mostly potion manuals.
She stood up and walked to the potion laboratory door. "Severus, I was wondering if I could buy some knitting supplies, while I am at the grocery store."
"You are welcome to do so Lily." Severus said.
"Thank you." Lily said and walked over to the jar Severus said held pounds. She was surprised at how much money Severus had actually stuffed into the jar. She hesitated a moment, before deciding to take it all and bring back the change. She went to the car, got in and drove to the grocery store. She got the food that she needed and asked about finding a knitting store. She was given directions to the next town over and drove to it. She picked out soft yarn in baby blue and black, she liked the way the two colors looked together and the baby she carried now was Severus' son. She picked out a book of knitting patterns and found some black alpaca wool. She decided to buy enough to make a sweater for Severus and was surprised at how much it cost. She paid for it and several pairs of knitting needles, glad that there was quite a bit of money left over. On impulse she bought some more wool to make a hat and scarf for Severus in black and green.
She smiled and left the store, she then drove back to Severus' house. She sat down in the chair and started to knit Severus' sweater. She hesitated a moment, before weaving in small spells for energy and clarity. She had decided to make it like a potion master's robe, complete with the high color that offered some protection against spilled potions. She added another spell, which would cause liquid to slide off the sweater, when it was spilled onto it. After that she had to add yet another spell to the sweater to insure it could be washed. She then started to work on the sweater, she didn't want to bother with all the buttons needed in a true potion master's robe. She was a quarter of the way through several hours later when Severus emerged from the lab.
"I have set my alarm clock, but could you wake me in a hour if I don't get up."
"Of course." Lily replied, Severus looked dead on his feet, she wished that she could brew the potion in his place, but knew she couldn't. He turned into his bedroom and she went back to her knitting, casting her own charm to alert her of the time. When fifty nine minutes had passed, she put down her knitting and waited. After Severus failed to arrive for five minutes, she went into his rooms. She smiled at the sight of him, he had clearly flopped onto his bed, without even bothering to take off his shoes. He lay face down and snored loudly. She gently shook him, before shaking him harder and then finally flipping him over onto his back and giggled when she saw that his mouth was wide open. However the potion needed his attention. "SEVERUS!" She bellowed at the top of her lungs and Severus' eyes snapped open, they appeared briefly panicked, before he saw Lily. "I'm sorry Severus, I forgot."
"It is alright Lily, thank you for waking me." Severus said and got to his feet. "It couldn't have been easy."
"It wasn't, I'll sleep now and you can wake me the next time you can take a break." She told him gently. "You are clearly exhausted and you better had wake me, otherwise I'd feel even more guilty."
"Alright." Severus agreed and Lily left his room going to lie down in her own. She fell asleep soon after getting into bed.