Chapter 3: Our Heroes

Walking along the great broad branch that linked the oak tree with the spruce tree came that valiant team of heroes, the Rescue Rangers. Many had been the time when this stalwart band had stood alone against the forces of Evil and time and again emerged triumphant. The group was suddenly brought to a halt by the pronouncement of their wise and unflappable leader:

"We are doomed!"

Chip - for once - was not at the head of the procession. Instead he was at the rear, and was nearly invisible under a pile of paperwork and notebooks that would be tiny by human standards but enormous by a chipmunk's. The papers had all been neatly typewritten by Gadget, who was leading the procession.

"What is it now?" she asked testily. She was dressed in a white lab coat, her hair in a tight bun at the back of her head. In one arm she carried a clipboard with several abstract printouts attached, printouts that appeared to use more colors than should rightfully exist. She was trying her best to block out a rather annoying buzzing at the back of her skull.

Chip felt a little sheepish under her sharp gaze. "I just realized we're heading towards a party full of Tammies."

Dale grinned. "Correction, Chip. You are doomed." Dale was also dressed uncharacteristically, in a full black tuxedo adorned with sequins. In one hand he carried a large black suitcase across which was printed the legend "The Great Dale-Dini".

"If I didn't know better, Chip, I'd swear you didn't like her," added Gadget.

The other Rangers laughed, which did nothing to improve Chip's mood. Now he began to feel a headache building.

"I'm not the only one walking into a potential trap, here," he said. "For instance, I've seen the way those squirrel boys follow you around when they think you're not looking, Gadget." He immediately regretted saying this.

Gadget looked at him with a bewildered expression in her eyes. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Never mind."

Dale laughed. "It's almost as if I'm the only one not getting stalked by potential lovers."

Walking beside him, Foxglove, a "close personal friend" of Dale, rolled her eyes. She was wearing a long red dress with slits for her wings, sequined similarly to Dale's outfit. Her hair was up in a beehive. She kept fidgeting with the bottom of the dress and occasionally looked down to see how it trailed behind her, as if she thought it had a mind of its own. "I hope nobody minds that I'm tagging along," she said. "After all, the invitation was for the Rescue Rangers, not 'Rescue Rangers and guest'."

"Don't be silly, Foxglove," Dale said. "You can't have a magic show without the pretty assistant, and I couldn't ask for a prettier assistant than you." Foxglove blushed at this compliment.

"Besides, you've been staying with us so long that you're practically family." This remark was made by Monterey Jack and was shortly followed by Zipper's non-vocal agreement. The two of them were the only ones wearing their normal workday clothes. They also appeared to be rather tired out.

Foxglove blushed again, but for a different reason. "Gosh, I'm sorry to be inconveniencing you so much. I promise I'll start another house hunt tonight." She had been staying with the Rangers off and on for the past year while the human church she usually lived in was having its dome repainted, a process run by an enthusiastic artist that looked like it would never end. The longest she had been away from the Ranger Tree had been three weeks in February. Feeling that her over-long stay was unfair on her hosts, the bat had attempted to "pay her way" by helping the group with their cases. Chip had initially resisted, but she had eventually proved herself. Nevertheless, the insecure bat feared she had overstayed her welcome.

The Rescue Rangers shared a significant look at the bat's remark. "Golly, Foxglove," said Gadget, speaking for all of them, "what use is a guest room if you don't have a guest staying there? We'd like you to stay as long as you'd like, but if you really think you need a place of your own, we'll all help you look for a place tomorrow. No...wait, I'm afraid I'll be busy tomorrow with the demonstration. But I promise we'll help you look the day after tomorrow, if you haven't changed your mind."

Chip refused to ignore his nagging intuition. "Well, whatever it is, I just have this feeling of impending doom. Is today Fat Cat's birthday or something?"

Gadget shook her head, impatient to get the group moving again. "That was two months ago, Chip."

Chip tried and failed to scratch his head in frustration. "Right. Why didn't I remember that? Monty, what did you find on your little mission?"

It took a moment for Monty to realize he had been addressed, as he was busy trying to rub the sudden headache out of his temples. "Huh? Oh, uh, yes." He looked over at Zipper, who whispered in his ear. "Oh, yes. Professor Nimnul is still locked up, and he shows no sign of ever wanting to leave. There was something else, butno, I think that might have been cheese-related." A familiar far-off look came into Monty's eyes as he pronounced his favorite word.

"OK, so that's not it." mused Chip.

Foxglove suddenly shot up her right wing into the air, hopping up and down on one foot. "Oo! Oo! I know!"

"Yes, Foxglove?"

"Tomorrow will be the one-year anniversary of the day, in an alternate timeline, when the Rangers broke up!"

Chip gave Foxglove a long, hard look as he tried to parse what she just said. The effort made his headache worse. "Foxglove," he concluded, "the more I get to know you, the more I become convinced that you and Dale are made for each other."

Foxglove grinned from ear to ear. "Why thank you, Chip! That's so thoughtful!"

Chip gave Foxglove another strange look, then shrugged and set out to catch up with Gadget, who had resumed walking. As he walked, the pile of paperwork started dangerously leaning, first one way and then another.

Alerted by some sixth sense, Gadget whirled and rushed up to Chip. "Be careful with those papers you fool! Think of the damage you could do to my reputation!" She exclaimed this in a rather odd tone.

Chip raised one eyebrow as he slowed down. "Gadget!" he exclaimed. "Are you feeling alright?"

Gadget gasped and put her free hand over her mouth. "I am so sorry, Chip! I don't know what came over me."

"I do," said Chip. "That wasn't you speaking just now."

Gadget nodded sadly. "Who knew that phone lines could be so noisy?" she said, half to herself. "I'm still not sure if that paper was my work, or actually his work."

"Oh, it's definitely yours," Dale said confidently. "Nimnul was never able to get his ideas down on paper so anybody else could understand them. That's why he never succeeded as a scientist."

Chip turned wearily to face the other chipmunk, asking, "And how did you know that, Dale?"

"I...I don't know."

"It's because we all got a bit of him, Dale."

Monty sighed. "Even when we think we are rid of him, he still manages to haunt us."

"There are some things you just can't change," Chip concluded.

Foxglove looked on silently, somewhat confused, as she had never been informed about this subject. Nevertheless, she felt like she ought to say something. "Well, you're the Rescue Rangers, right? You'll get through this like every other challenge you've ever faced. In the meantime, we're going to a party..." (this cheered up Dale) "...that's been catered..." (this cheered up Monty and Zipper) "...where Gadget will be honored for her scientific achievements..." (Gadget brightened a little at this) "...and the Rangers and their achievements will be a strong center of attention." This last bit was aimed at Chip but missed its mark. He decided to smile anyway, for the sake of morale.

"And don't forget the demonstration," Chip added. "Just imagine the look on Professor Hoppernickel's face when he sees...Oh, that's right, Sparky's machine won't be here until tomorrow, right? (Why am I having so much trouble remembering things today?)"

Just then, a voice cried out from the opening of the great squirrel and dove hall. "Look, everybody, it's the Rescue Rangers!"

Dale strode ahead of the group. "And so it begins," he proclaimed, leading them to the hall.