R: Hello! Well here it is! The 4th chapter! I'm sorry it took so long but well...I ran out of ideas, but fear not! My 'Mojo' has returned. Well enough prattiling please enjoy!

Snake was greeted with a small narrow corridor and the slight hum of the engines

Snake was greeted with a small narrow corridor and the slight hum of the engines. He carefully sneaked along, his M9 drawn when he noticed something.

"Raven?"

The silhouette of the former FOXHOUND member (a local pizza delivery company) was lit eerily against the wall.

Snake raised his gun ready to fire. He'd had a few...unfortunate run-in's with this guy that usually led to half of the city being destroyed as Snake tried to 'borrow'

a pizza.

Snake jumped round the corner with blinding speed and fired off just over 80 billion rounds.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...oh...erm...whoops!" Screamed Snake.

The person who was actually present was in fact well...no one, some sad-o had left a plastic figurine of the mighty pizza deliveryman...thing in front of a torch.

The wall that had so far with stood Snake's mighty attack had promptly crumbled to nothing. It had however revealed a secret compartment that contained a large amount of drugs.

Snake crouched stylishly and cupped his ear.

"Otacon what the hell are marine/clowns doing with about...5000 pounds of multi-vitamins?"

"I don't have the foggiest!" Replied Otacon.

"Whatever! I am seriously low on my vitamin c!"

Otacon sighed as Snake turned off the codec and promptly nicked half of the 'drugs'.

"Ahhhhh! Healthiness in a bottle." Said Snake whilst swallowing 18 tubs in one go.

After Snake had decided he'd topped up his vitamin c. He continued through the next automatic door and saw the colossal engine and the noise was immense.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!"

Snake's voice was drowned out by the sheer roar of the engines. This was a good thing because his eardrums had just exploded and didn't stop screaming for several hours.

"Ow! Damn it I left the freaking surround sound on!"

Snake turned off a conveniently placed 'Dolby Digital' surround sound system and was about to continue when the codec went off again.

"Snake you know the guards won't be able to hear your USP!" Hinted Otacon.

"Reeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaalllllllllyyyyyyyy?"

"Erm yup!"

"So I can do what I want huh?"

"Yeah go nuts!"

"Will do!"

A guard was walking up the stairs and had long ago gone deaf. He approached the top of the stairs and saw a strange man.

Snake had in fact literally gone 'nuts' and was jumping up and down on one leg with his tongue hanging out, frothing at the mouth, waving his arms above his head and was imitating the 'crazy frog' (I'm so sorry I mentioned that!).

But this was however just part of Snake's ingenious plan to…erm…lure a guard? He suddenly reverted back to his original state and shot the guard. Snake had even added his own 'pow' sounds with each gunshot.

Snake continued on regardless down another set of stairs. He was now on a gangway, which had nothing other than, a wait for it…another set of stairs! They were going downwards.

Snake groaned he'd had enough of stairs in the 'Shadow Moses' incident. Two huge communication towers with enough stairs in them that he managed to reach the stratosphere.

Snake was now on the bottom floor of the engine room the sight ahead was well lit. The end of a gun barrel could be seen.

Snake using his almighty 8 millio…well only 8 brain cells realized that there must be a guard on the other end of the rifle.

He very carefully leaned against the wall and popped just enough of his head round so that he could see but that the guard couldn't see him. Snake was surprised at what he saw.

It appeared to be a manikin carefully positioned to look like a guard holding a gun. Out of blind curiosity Snake stepped out in front of it. With a raised eyebrow Snake examined it.

"AH HA!" Shouted a voice from behind.

Snake turned round gun-raised ready to fire. To end some ones life to save his own. Ready to fire at the slightest movement.

"You fell for my trap!" Said the guard.

"Erm…okay where's your gun?" Questioned Snake.

"What oh! Errrrrrr……crap. I hadn't thought that far ahead!" Said the guard.

"Ha." Commented Snake.

The guard seemed to be in an incredibly deep state of thought he was even massaging his chin. Snake allowed this to continue for some time until he got board waiting for the guard to do something.

'BANG'

'BANG…BANG'

'BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG……BANG'

'………BANG.'

Snake continued across the small bridge like crossing. It was only at that moment he realized that he was in fact walking over a large bottomless pit. He glanced down and tried to hear over the roar of the engines…he could have sworn he

heard something.

"Help! I can't stop falling!"

He couldn't quite make it out though so he continued on. There was a small set of steps leading to yet more stairs on his left and a bit more of a walk way on his right. He decided to go up the stairs.

As Snake proceeded up them he noticed a guard looking at the wall with a pair of binoculars. Snake approached him and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Ahem! Excuse me!"

"WHAT?!" Replied the guard.

"WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?" Shouted back Snake.

"Alright alright! No need to shout!"

"Oh sorry! Well what are you looking at?"

"A poster."

"What of?"

"Check it out!"

The guard handed Snake the binoculars and pointed at the direction he was facing. Snake looked through the powerful lenses and found it the poster.

"SWEET!!"

It was of course an 'adult' image of a scantily clad Japanese woman. After a few moments of staring his brain kicked in.

"Erm…just how on earth did you get a poster there? I mean it's at least what…20 feet away from the nearest ledge?" Questioned Snake.

The guard seemed puzzled. He didn't know either in fact no one knew just how that had gotten there.

"Erm…well lets see…Errr…Ummm…hold on a sec!"

The guard got a hold of his radio and flicked on the switch. And turned away from Snake. He then spoke into it.

"Hey erm…how'd that poster get on the wall in the engine room?" Questioned the guard.

"What?! How the hell would I know? Just stop staring and deal with any intruders!" The radio spluttered.

The guard seemed to acknowledge this and turned off the radio. He turned round to see nothing, there was no one there.

Although this didn't actually bother the guard. He re-equipped himself with a pair of binoculars and stared out at the poster. What he saw next scared him a little.

Snake was currently attached to the wall hugging the poster and kissing it. The guard rubbed his eyes and looked back at the poster. There was no one there not even a trace of existence.

The surprised guard thinking that he was going crazy turned around to head to the infirmary. But Snake standing there interrupted him.

"Hey can I have a look?"

"Wait…what…you were…but…how…" Said the confused guard.

With the strenuous amounts of thinking, confusion, turning between Snake and the wall and pointing at each of them. The guard's head imploded with a slight 'plop' sound.

"Brilliant! It worked!" Exclaimed Snake.

At this point the codec sounded and Otacon was also baffled as to what had just happened.

"Snake how did you do that?" Questioned Otacon.

"Do what?"

"Well how you'd jump on to the poster and get back that quickly!"

"What poster? There is no poster! I'm in an engine room for god's sake!"

"Wha…? Whatever just keep going!"

Snake continued forward…and fell over the railing. He luckily landed on solid ground he got back up on his feet and went along the walkway this time.

In the distance a bright light could be seen. It was a guard patrolling the lower section of that side. Snake very carefully walked along, his gun already aimed at the guard slowly moving closer and closer and closer…

The guard turned round only to see Solid Snake an inch away from his face with the world's largest grin.

"Helllllloooooo!"

The guard panicked and attempted to flee. He unfortunately failed as Snake was already on the other side of him with the same huge grin. The guard turned around again and Snake was there waiting for him.

The guard gave up and jumped backwards over the railing. A constant "AAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaa." Could be heard. Snake continued down the walkway where the guard would have been walking. Snake's humongous grin was now just a mere 'oh yeah! I did that!' Kind of smile.

Snake was presented with another option now he could…well okay it wasn't much of an option but he could co up the set of stairs or well stay where he was. He decided that he would go up the stairs.

He was now on the middle floor of this section he could continue on forward back to where the poster staring guard…was. Or he could go up even more stairs. Which he did.

Snake crept very carefully making sure that his foot didn't stick out round the corner or that his shadow revealed his position. He leaned against the wall and peeked round. The guard was right next to the door his hand ready on the radio.

Snake realized that there wouldn't be much of a chance of getting through the door and not getting seen. He thought very carefully about what his next move should be. He could of used the cardboard box trick…if he had one. The other way was to make a noise and lure out the guard.

But that would be impossible here so Snake decided on a different tactic. One that he'd never used but had seen in work. It was nigh on perfect worked 9 times out of 10.

He stepped round the corner and lowered his head, with his hands clenched in 'prayer' close to his face as he was 'blending'.

He slowly walked out in front of the guard making sure that he didn't increase or decrease his speed. The guard acknowledged Snake's presence only as a civilian. He managed to get through the door and locked it himself.

"A job well done I must say!" Said a triumphant Snake.

He examined the room and noted that the correct way to go was to the right past the watertight door and that's the entrance to the holds. To his left was the back to the crew quarters (you could tell this because there was a butler waiting to serve any guests).

Snake proceeded in the correct direction. He was about to walk into the trap when he heard a whirring noise. He decided to investigate. He walked over to the door and told the butler to shut up.

Snake leaned against the wall next to the door waiting for something to happen. The door slid open and a guard stepped out he took out his radio and spoke into it.

"Entry to the engine room now finished to the door works!"

"That's good but I didn't ask you to do that."

"Oh well no love lost huh?"

"You're not getting paid for it!"

"WHAT! HOW DARE YOU I SLAVED OVER THAT DOOR FOR HOURS ON END AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME? YOU SON OF A-"

His rant was cut off as Snake emptied an entire clip in to the guard's chest. Snake looked up from the corpse to the butler.

"Well take care of it Jeeves!"

"Yes Sir Immediately." Replied the butler.

Snake complimented the butler by tipping him for clearing up the body. At which point he continued back to the watertight door when with unnatural talent predicted the future and contacted Otacon.

"Otacon I know that there's a trap don't bother phoning me or when I get back I WILL kill you!"

"Erm…okay all I was going to say was that you can shoot out the control boxes."

"Right will do! Now time for those boxes to die!"

"WAIT!"

"What?" Snake sighed.

"The control boxes are the ones with the with flashing green lights!"

"Oh so not the ones marked 'Semtex'?"

"Now shoot the flashing lights!"

Snake turned off the codec and raised his USP. He aimed lined up the sights and fired. The control boxes exploded into sparks and one set of the three sensors deactivated. Snake looked around for the next one.

But instead he spotted three lockers with a poster on two of them. One poster was a woman smiling and the other was a man smiling. Snake decided randomly to take a photo of them. After he'd finished doing that he continued looking for the other control boxes.

After several hours he'd managed to disarm the sensors. They were in very strange places. One of them was on the ceiling the other one was in fact in Snake's equipment pouch.

Snake very gingerly walked trough the passage moving very carefully and cautiously. He knew this wouldn't make a difference if the thing did in fact blow up but he didn't care.

It worked! The Semtex didn't detonate and Snake was very much still alive. He twisted the handle of the door and walked through.

"This is almost it! I'm on my way to the holds entrance!" Snake said to himself.

Snake took a few steps in the dark almost pitch black corridor when the tannoy spluttered to life.

"Verrazano bridge check point past…"

"FUCK!" Exclaimed Snake.

"All marines…er…I mean clowns are to report to the holds for the commandants speech."

"Damn! I'll have to hurry!"

R: Heh Heh! Well what do you think? I thought it was a bit short myself! And perhaps not as funny as i could have made but please let me know what you think in a review! (nudge nudge wink wink!)

Oh and do try to wait as it may be a while befor the next one! Don't forget to review!

Till next time this has been the R!