Story: Making Arrangments

Rating: M

Author: CrownsofLaurels

Beta: Eurwen de Vrill

Chapter Three: Frienemies

Summary: Naruto breaks her nose, drinks twenty seven different kinds of alcohol, and gets Kyūbi's blessing…sort of.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, I write this for fun and receive no profit.

Chapter Three: Frienemies

THWACK.

Naruto groaned and stumbled backward, tripping over some dropped weaponry and falling roughly on her butt in the mud. Her hands instinctively flew to her face as she gingerly touched her nose. Tears of pain gathered in the corners of her eyes as she confirmed that it was broken.

"Naruto!" A voice called out in concern and Naruto focused just long enough to make out the blurry image of a pink-haired female leaning over her. "How many fingers am I holding up?"

Naruto closed her eyes. "Twelve."

"She'll be fine," huffed Sakura, leaning forward with glowing green hands to assess the damage.

Naruto clenched her hand around a discarded kunai and dug it into the ground as Sakura, without warning, set her nose. At least I didn't cry. Naruto blinked rapidly, trying to make good on that thought as Sakura began to heal the broken blood vessels in her face and soothe out the blood that would normally cause bruising.

When her vision cleared and the several hazy versions of Sakura solidified into one, Naruto relocated her attacker standing a dozen feet away, arms crossed and scowling, katana stuck in the ground by his side. The grim young man didn't look the least bit sorry that his roundhouse kick had almost shattered his teammate's face.

"What's wrong with you, Loser?" Sasuke eyed the sprawled blonde with contempt, sounding personally offended. "You've been off all day."

"Good as new." Sakura announced, rocking back on her heels. "With Kurama's help, by suppertime you won't even feel sore." She sighed. "So unfair."

Naruto forlornly tore at the forest floor with her kunai. "I just have a lot on my mind today. Sorry, I probably should have passed on sparring."

"Moron." Sasuke sheathed his katana and turned away. "Come find me when your brain is working again…or, rather, since I've never actually known it to work in the first place, come find me when you can put one foot in front of another without eating dirt." He stalked off, clearly dismissing the situation as beneath his concern.

"Jackass!" Naruto yelled at his retreating back, watching him disappear, presumably heading for another training ground and partners capable of combating basic taijutsu. Naruto collapsed flat onto her back with a sigh, looking for glimpses of the sunset through the dense green canopy overhead.

Sakura watched their teammate leave with a stony expression. It had been a long time since she'd rushed to Sasuke's defense at Naruto's name-calling. At the moment, she was still struggling with the urge to chase after the boy, but now the urge was to chase after him and scold him for his poor treatment of a friend rather than an attempt to capture his affection. She pushed thoughts of Sasuke away with practiced determination and sat down cross-legged next to the sprawling blonde.

"Must really be something to distract you mid-spar." The medic-nin watched her companion's unusually pensive face carefully for anything that might shed light on the girl's troubles.

Naruto just shrugged slightly, as best she could when lying flat against the ground. "I've just got a lot on my mind. I'll deal with it, I just need some time to wrap my head around it all."

Naruto normally enjoyed the afternoon sparring sessions with her teammates. Tsunade had been right when she had noted that the trio tried to spend every afternoon possible training together. It was more of an unspoken tradition that whenever anyone was free for an afternoon they headed to Training Ground Three and sparred with whoever they met. These days, when Naruto came, it was more likely than not that the forest and field would be empty. It made it all the more special when the three of them actually were able to meet, which was why Naruto hadn't begged off sparring for the afternoon.

Sakura relaxed in the quiet for a few moments, listening to the birds beginning to chirp again now that the ninja had halted their unpredictable and violent movements. "Did you get a mission?"

Naruto grimaced, pulling herself up so that she was sitting next to the girl. "I can't talk about it," she answered honestly. Naruto knew herself well enough to acknowledge that she wasn't a good liar and it would be better to let Sakura know that the information was classified than to arouse the girl's curiosity with lies or pathetic attempts to change the subject. Sakura could respect "classified," but if she thought that Naruto was lying to her then any investigation into the cause was fair game, including raiding Tsunade's desk in a moment of distraction. They were ninja after all, information meant power and survival.

Sakura sighed, slightly disappointed. "Anything I can do to help?" She didn't truly expect an answer. When her teammate got into a funk like this, typically the only thing that could solve it was Naruto personally working through her feelings on the issue. A few days of gloominess, which would put all the girl's friends on edge, and Naruto would pop back to her bright, buoyant self.

Surprisingly, Naruto stopped herself in the midst of shaking her head. "Actually," said the blonde seriously, "I think I should try to get drunk."

Sakura's green eyes widened. Then she stood and held out her hands to pull her companion to her feet. "I think I can manage that," she laughed.

"You're like a camel," Sakura ground out, eyeing the blonde next to her with an envious look at odds with her previous comment. "Where does it all go? How do you not have to pee like crazy?"

Naruto finished off her twenty-third glass of the evening, dismayed to discover that Kurama either wasn't as attentive as he had been earlier that morning, or was purposefully being contrary and vindictive. Although, come to think about it, perhaps she hadn't been feeling tipsy this morning so much as an unbalancing mix of incredulous and horrified.

Ino laughed loudly, an odd flush to her cheeks as she sat across from the pair, sitting casually next to a visibly uncomfortable Hinata. "I think she's my new hero," she crowed, "just think of how much money we could make if we got people to challenge her to a drinking contest."

"Ummm….maybe we should stop," the dark haired heiress mumbled as Ino called out for another round of drinks.

"No way." The ringleader tossed her blonde ponytail over her shoulder. "We haven't even figured out what's wrong with the girl yet."

"The girl is right here, Ino, and nothing is wrong." Naruto's exasperated response slid off Ino's shoulders like oil meeting water.

"Pfffshhh," scoffed Ino. "If nothing was wrong, we wouldn't be here. Girls' Nights aren't successful unless you come away with at least some juicy tidbit and my experienced gossip-sniffing nose says that you, my dear, are more valuable than dirt on the Daimyo tonight."

"Ino," scolded Sakura, "If she doesn't want to talk—"

The Yamanaka leaned across the table and locked eyes with Naruto. "It's a boy, isn't it?"

Naruto's blush and subsequent stuttering denial did nothing to deter the determined girl.

"I knew I was right!" Ino slumped back to her chair victoriously and Hinata regarded the jinchūriki curiously.

Sakura stopped mid eye-roll and turned to face her teammate. "There's a boy?" Sakura frowned. "Why didn't you tell me there was a boy?"

"There is no boy!"

"Liar!" cried Ino. "You're redder than Hinata when Kiba flirts with her in public!"

"Am not," retorted Naruto, face burning. "There's not a boy!" She turned to Sakura pleadingly, "There's not a boy, Sakura-chan."

Sakura hmmed thoughtfully, but didn't look like she believed her teammate's refutations.

"Oh," Ino chuckled darkly, "there is definitely a boy. Now who is he? Come, come now, 'fess up. Auntie Ino will tell you exactly what to do to satisfy your crush."

Naruto blushed even more and Hinata, sympathetic to Ino's newest prey, began to encourage the others to cease the inquisition, but to no avail.

Sakura drummed her fingers anxiously on the table top. "It's not Sasuke is it?" The girl's tone was filled with dread.

"No!" exclaimed Naruto, struggling to refrain from choking on her drink. "It is definitely, definitely, not the Bastard."

Sakura's shoulders relaxed in relief. "Good. I mean, not that I still like him that way, but I don't think that you'd be good for one another."

"Right," drawled Ino.

"No, really," Sakura said defensively, "I just don't think he's in a good place right now…he needs some more time to get his head on his shoulders right before he tries to be emotionally involved with someone."

"Hmm….since Daddy is violently opposed to the idea of me canoodling with Village traitors, I'll have to trust your word on that one." The haughty blonde fixed her gaze on Naruto. "But adorable pet names aside, Miss Unpredictable Kunoichi here isn't lying when she says her crush isn't the guy with, indisputably, the nicest abs in the Konoha." Ino tapped a manicured fingernail against her chin and eyed her target with an intelligent, speculative gaze. "So then, let's play a game."

Naruto braced herself. Shikamaru might be the smartest of her peers in strategy, but no one their age could best Ino's abilities in psychology. Ino would know the source of Naruto's anxiety regardless of the newest chūnin's verbal response. She was like a living lie detector. Maybe this wasn't the best idea, thought Naruto nervously. Hinata bit her lip but was apparently curious enough not to protest the turn of events and Sakura, satisfied that Sasuke was out of the running, seemed content to lean back and watch Ino work.

"Sai?" asked the intelligence specialist.

Naruto's face wrinkled in distaste.

"Kiba?"

Hinata shrunk a little, but relaxed when Ino rapidly continued, "No, it's not him."

Ino began to count on her fingers as she listed names. "Shino? Chouji? Oh, please not Shikamaru…no, good? Lee? You're not cradle-robbing are you, I know he's vocal but Konohamaru is still a bit too young for you for at least two more years."

"No!" sputtered Naruto indignantly. Sakura directed a flat look at her best friend/rival/thing.

"What?" shrugged Ino. "He shows promise, give him two more years and you'll be reconsidering that opinion when he grows into Asuma-sensei's shoulders." Hinata's blush was ignored by Ino, who bit her lip in concentration until an odd look crossed her face.

"It's not Iruka-sensei, it it?"

"Ino!"

"No, not him then." Ino defended herself, "Had to check, sometimes sibling relationships evolve into other things if there is no biological connection."

Naruto downed another drink and desperately wished Kurama would stop intervening with her biological processes.

"Someone outside the village then? You know as much as the Kazekage adores you, long distance relationships like that are a pill…" Ino trailed off, intently studying Naruto's face for hints.

"No," she finally said with finality. "It's definitely someone in the village and it's someone we know or you wouldn't be so guarded about it all."

Sakura finally decided to give the pig-tailed blonde a break. "There are people in this village that you don't know Ino. And there are plenty of ninja our own age who we don't regularly interact with, she could just be nervous about the possibility of us knowing the guy."

Ino's pout temporarily fled as an idea hit her. "Is it a girl?" She settled back down into a sulk at Naruto's subsequent flail of arms. "No, it's a guy, I knew I couldn't have read you wrong on that one…" Ino trailed off, wracking her brain for ideas about the identity of Naruto's supposed love interest.

Sakura stood with a sigh. "I'm going home. I'll be in surgery in the morning and I need to be well-rested."

Hinata rose. "I, too, need to return to my house at a reasonable hour." She bowed slightly to the group. "Thank you for a pleasant evening." She blushed slightly as she rose. "It is nice to be able to spend time with friends." She headed for the door, where an unfamiliar Hyūga rose from his stool to accompany her out into the night.

"That girl…" Ino shook her head as she rose, pulling some money out of her purse and contributing to the pile in the center of the table already started by the other three girls.

Sakura gave a grunt of agreement. "Come on Naruto, I'll walk you home." She grabbed Naruto's hand and tugged her sharply out of the booth. She ignored the girl's protests and pulled her outside. "See you tomorrow, Ino-pig!"

Once they'd left the restaurant, Sakura released her teammate and they walked companionably down the relatively empty, moon-lit roads of the village.

Naruto rubbed her wrist. "I can walk home by myself, you know."

Sakura snorted. "Forgive me if I don't test that theory after watching you imbibe twenty-seven glasses of different alcoholic beverages over the past two hours."

"I was testing a hypothesis," Naruto said with a grin.

"And the results?"

"Classified."

"Right." Sakura shook her head and playfully pushed her companion. "Next time you feel like testing the same hypothesis, let me know. Ino was right about one thing, we can make a killing if we play our cards right in a bar and start a drinking contest."

Sakura stopped as they reached Naruto's apartment. It wasn't that far from Sakura's residence and only required that she go a few blocks out of her way. Sakura didn't mind at all, especially considering the mood that Naruto had been in that day. "Will you be alright?"

"Yeah." Naruto flashed her friend a reassuring smile. "Really, Sakura-chan, don't worry about me, I'll be right as rain in a day or so."

"You know you can talk to me—"

"I do," said Naruto soberly. "And I will when I can, promise of a lifetime."

Sakura's lips twitched at the familiar phrase. "Fine, then. Sleep well, Naru-chan."

Naruto spent all night staring at the ceiling of her apartment, stomach churning with unresolved fear and tension. What have I gotten myself into?

She looked at the clock: 2 A.M. She rolled over and fluffed her pillow. "It's too hot," she mumbled, kicking off her blankets and stumbling over to crack open the window. She pushed her head against the cool window pane, looking out at the dark, sleepy houses. Stretching her senses, she could feel the light glow of chakra as a few ninja patrolled the village from the rooftops; she knew every single one and found their attention reassuring, but it didn't offer her enough comfort to get some sleep tonight.

She took a deep breath and returned to bed, but instead of climbing under the covers she sat atop them. She settled herself down to meditate and closed her eyes. Forcing herself to relax, she measured her breathing and reached for the familiar presence of her bijū.

What do you think of this whole mess, Kurama?

She didn't receive an answer at first, but she felt movement within her, almost like a large cat unfurling itself after a long nap in its favorite patch of sunshine.

I was sleeping, Brat. The voice was deeper than any sound that a human could produce and she felt it echo in her bones despite the fact that it existed only in her mind.

I thought that if I couldn't sleep I could at least share the gift of my insomnia.

Kurama took his time responding. Naruto imagined him licking his claws. (Not that she would ever admit that to him, he hated being compared to a cat…those inferior upstarts).

The only reason you won't be waking up feeling like the drums of war are sounding in your head tomorrow is because of my intervention. I would be more grateful, if I were you.

I'm groveling at your feet, Oh Great One.

As well you should, it's only right. Kyūbi sniffed and settled himself as if he was a king lounging on his throne, hearing the mundane complaints of his subjects.

Naruto barely stopped herself from laughing, but sobered quickly when she remembered why she had reached out to her old companion.

I care not, said the fox, unprompted, for your ordinary, boring affairs. Mate with the male, spread your legs and have so many kits that they eat you out of den and forest. It matters not to me.

Gee, that was polite. Sarcasm bled into her thoughts but did little to rile the Kyūbi. Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the cage today.

May all your spawn have nine tails from birth.

Naruto was fairly certain that was some type of curse in fox-speech, but as she didn't understand it she shrugged it off and prodded the reluctant creature to participate in the conversation.

I know you pay more attention to my surroundings than you let on, she began carefully, and I know that you have more experience observing human relationships than any human can claim to have themselves. A little bit of flattery never hurt when dealing with an ornery bijū. Can I…will this work?

For a long time, there was silence and Naruto resigned herself to the fact that Kurama wouldn't be weighing in anymore on this issue. Technically, he'd given her his blessing to go forth and multiply, as it were. She was just going to have to be content with the comments that he'd shared.

That particular talking monkey is better than he believes himself to be, Kurama's words rang forth reluctantly. He will be a fine mate. He will give you strong kits, and he will ensure that they are protected and provided for until they leave your den.

It was comments like these that reminded Naruto just how different Kurama's perspective on life was from her own. The bijū was a chakra monster, but had been given the form of a fox and still tended to approach life as a fox might on most occasions. Naruto restructured her question. Yes, but will he even want to be my mate?

The response was given with a mixture of surprise and arrogance. Why would he refuse? There is no talking monkey stronger than you and the pair of you are young and healthy. Your kits will be powerful. He should be honored that I would consider allowing you to invite him to your den. His choice of company leaves much to be desired (Naruto could only assume that he was referring to Kakashi's dogs), but no talking monkey can be perfect.

Naruto could feel the Kyūbi pondering the issue a bit more, trying to understand the source of Naruto's anxiety. Eventually, the fox settled for offering, If he refuses, I can eat him.

You can't eat him, Kurama. Naruto could feel the Kyūbi's disagreement with her words, but the chakra creature held his tongue rather than restart an old and frequent argument. I suppose I should thank you for your blessing—

Blessing? You have my reluctantly won tolerance for the situation, don't fool yourself, mortal. Kyūbi began to curl himself up within the seal, settling in for a deep sleep. And mind you, one of those kits better be taught to treat me properly, I won't give up my current way of living just because my next jailer is a bit skittish with my company.

Naruto half-heartedly listened to the fox's irritated mumblings about preparing the next jinchūrikki. She didn't really want to deal with that at the moment. She dropped back to the bed with a groan and resolved to count ceiling cracks until dawn.

At a reasonable hour the next morning, Naruto donned some rarely used civilian attire (orange shirt, loose pants and sandals). She wasn't sure who she was going to see and she didn't want to come across as too intimidating. Running a barely bristled brush that had seen better days through her hair, she tied the messy locks up with familiar movements and strapped a small shuriken pouch to her thigh. She bounced out the door, whistling cheerfully as she headed for a more upscale part of the village.

She had memorized the address, as well as the sparse contents of the scroll (which really boiled down to seduce Hatake, have his kid, we'll pay you well) and then promptly destroyed both as instructed.

She knew of the apartment complex she was headed for but had never been there personally. It was a nicer area of the village that ninja didn't tend to occupy. It had quaint civilian homes and apartments with balconies that held carefully tended potted plants. Everything about the area was non-threatening and friendly with civilians loudly holding market stalls in the streets and bustling about in dense shopping crowds. Shinobi tended to like living in more secluded areas with fewer civilians in which they could set up personal protections. Apartments in sections of the village like this tended to frown on such practices. Naruto's landlord, on the other hand, just rolled his eyes and told her that when she moved out she'd be paying for every hole she put in the wall and every kunai gouge in the floor.

Naruto arrived at the complex and ignored the curious glances of the civilians, feeling a bit self-conscious and out-of-place as she walked up the stairs, carefully tiled with bright colors and complex pretty patterns. At least nobody looks at me like they hate me anymore.

On the fourth and top floor, she veered down a hallway and stopped in front of the unassuming door of the last corner unit. Taking a deep breath, she pushed her shoulders back and knocked, two quick, three slow, a pattern only used by the ninja of Konoha when knocking on the doors of someone who might not recognize their chakra signature. It was an act of courtesy and really didn't do anything for safety, as it would be simple enough for a spy to pick up, but Sakura had told her that it was a polite tradition and to just shut up and do the knock because, really, did it cost Naruto anything to just follow custom for five seconds?

A light voice called for her to wait a moment and Naruto fidgeted nervously on the doorstep. She was rocking back and forth on her heels and contemplating coming back later when she heard some latches click and she stepped back in shock as the green wooden door opened, revealing a pretty woman with dark hair and striking eyes.

"Kurenai-sensei?" Naruto squeaked.