Well, seeing as the world decided not to end this weekend after all, I suppose I can go ahead and post the next chapter. And hopefully more 'Hiraishin...' chapters will be out before the next predicted Doomsday. Hopefully.
xxx
"...And that's pretty much how things are."
Kakashi nodded absently as Tazuna finished his tale, though most of his focus was set on removing the final few needles from Naruto's body. Fortunately, the boy was content to let him work, sitting quietly as he gazed out at the surface of the lake. The jounin still wasn't sure how the boy had survived so many seemingly-fatal wounds, though if he were to take a guess, he'd say the Kyubi was playing a role in it, since every time he pulled a senbon out, the hole would glow a crimson red before closing up almost instantly.
And wasn't that just perfect? The stoic, ever-relentless little stab-addict also had a healing factor. If the boy ever got to the point where he was moving at faster than below-average walking speed again Kakashi was packing up and moving to Kumo.
"I'll uh...I'll understand if you don't want anymore to do with me and decide to just head back home now," Tazuna went on. "Practically a stone's throw away from the village already, and seeing as you already took down Gato's mercs, maybe he'll be a little less eager to mess with us again..."
Kakashi considered his options. They'd been lied too, shortchanged, and led into a situation that...well, that most normal genin would find completely out of their leagues. With the village already in sight, they had all but achieved their goal of escorting Tazuna back to his home, not that they needed to complete it now anyway, and Tazuna himself had dismissed them from their mission.
There was really no need to continue onward.
"Tell me...about how many men does this Gato tyrant have working for him?"
Tazuna looked thrown by the unexpected question. "Er...gotta be at least two hundred of 'em, I suppose."
"Okay, we'll help you."
Tazuna blinked. "W-what?"
"Yep," the jounin said with a nod. "No additional charge."
"...But...why?"
"Let's just say I have my reasons," Kakashi answered vaguely.
"You're not just hoping to let those... kids of yours sate their insane bloodlust on Gato and all his men in the hope that they'll settle down and stop threatening physical violence on you and other innocent people for a while?"
"I have no idea what you're talking about. And now we will casually change the subject and not bring this up again."
"Right, sure," Tazuna nodded. He certainly wasn't going to hold the younger man's cowardice against him. Hell, he'd secretly been hoping that Kakashi would have taken him up on the offer to bail out and go back home just so he wouldn't have to deal with the demon children any longer, either.
"Well, on a slightly different note, did you really send those kids off to interrogate those mercenaries?"
Kakashi nodded. "They seemed so enthusiastic, I just didn't have it in me to break their little hearts."
"Of course. But what's the point? I mean, they're just hired swords after all. They probably couldn't tell you much more about the situation than I could."
Kakashi gave him a hard stare. "So?"
"...Gee, I never thought of it that way."
"Right?"
"Right."
The trio sat in relative silence for a while, listening to the sounds of birds chirping, fish splashing, insects buzzing, and not a whole lot else.
"The fact that there's no screaming actually fills my mind with even worse images of what might be happening than if there was any," Tazuna admitted.
Kakashi heaved a deep sigh and climbed to his feet. He supposed he'd have to go check on his little monsters and see if they'd left anything behind.
A quick Shunshin brought him to the Interrogation Room, which was just a much smaller clearing about twenty yards away from the larger one they'd just been in. He found Zabuza and the young masked ninja tied securely to adjacent trees. Zabuza looked like he'd been crying and Haku's neck seemed to have developed a twitch, as his head frequently jerked to the right. They didn't look nearly as beaten and broken as Kakashi had expected, which only worsened the mental images of what his demons might have been doing to them.
The demons in question looked rather pleased with themselves as they turned to address their teacher.
"It's no use, Sensei," Sakura informed him, not sounding at all disappointed about it. "We've tried everything and they're still not talking."
"Looks like we'll just have to kill 'em," Sasuke concurred, running his sharpened fingernails lightly across his own cheek and letting them catch the glint of the sunlight.
Zabuza and Haku instantly began shaking their heads and mumbling profusely, though it was impossible to make out what they were saying.
Slowly, Kakashi walked past his students, reached out toward their captives, and lowered Zabuza's facial bandages with one hand and lifted Haku's mask with the other. Over both of their mouths was a thick strip of tape.
Kakashi looked back over his shoulder, where Sakura was doing an unconvincing job of looking innocent. Sasuke wasn't even trying.
"I suppose you're going to suggest that we put that tape on their mouths to keep them from talking as an excuse to continue torturing them until they died a horribly long and drawn out death?"
Kakashi continued staring.
"You can't prove it," Sasuke stated.
Kakashi decided it was time to start ignoring his students, and ripped the tape from their captive's mouths.
"You...are a cruel and twisted man, Hatake Kakashi," Zabuza growled weakly as Haku twitched in agreement. "The lowest plane of Hell would spit you back out for allowing these demons to do half the things that they did. Have you no shame? No sense of decency? How do you sleep at night?"
"I'm not going to let them interrogate you anymore," Kakashi informed him.
"A saint among squalor is what you are. Far to good for this mortal coil full of sin and debauchery. Temples will be built in your honor, where millions will tell tales of your mercy and grace."
"Yes, yes, I know. Now tell me everything you know or I'll go get the other one."
Once the two former Mist nin finished singing like canaries, Kakashi cut their ropes, and they fled the scene at a speed that would have made Namikaze Minato envious.
"Aww," Sakura whined as their playthings vanished from sight. Now what were she and Sasuke-kun going to bond over?
Sasuke glared at Kakashi. "I am going to kill someone before this day is over, and with the way you keep pissing me off-"
"Sasuke, if you and Sakura could please reign in your genocidal tendencies for just a little while," Kakashi cut off, not in the mood for more threats to his person. "We're almost to the Village of Waves and I promise there are going to be plenty of people for you to kill or whatever else you feel up to doing to them very soon."
The children grinned in anticipation.
xxx
Later...
"Sasuke."
"Hn?"
"When I said there were people in the village for you to kill, I didn't mean the civilians!"
Sasuke blew the hair from his eyes, though it fell right back into place. "I guess you should have been more specific, then."
"Eh, don't worry about it," Tazuna told them, hoping to placate things before more people died. "Never really liked those three anyway. Lazy slackers, they were. And I always suspected that Shin might have been a wife-beater."
Sasuke gave Kakashi his most smug of smirks. "See sensei, I'm helping."
Kakashi turned to Tazuna. "Please don't encourage my sociopaths."
"Hey, survival trumps morality in my life, pal," the old man replied.
xxx
Elsewhere...
"What?" Gato roared, leaping from his chair and grabbing the messenger by the lapels. "What do you mean you saw Zabuza running like the hounds of Hell were after him in the opposite direction of the base?"
The messenger in question cleared his throat. "Uh...you did a pretty good job of summing it up right there, boss."
The tyrant shoved the messenger away and began to pace. "Well did he at least kill the bridge-builder before he abandoned us?"
"Our intel says 'no', boss. Tazuna was seen approaching the village not long after with a masked man and three children accompanying him. Three people were killed before they arrived at his house, and we assume that they're planning to launch an attack on our headquarters."
Gato growled. "So the bastard just decides to ditch me, does he? Well, that's fine; I don't need his help anyway. I have plenty more men who are perfectly capable of carrying out a simple assassination on one feeble old drunk." He paused for a moment. "What was that thing you said in the middle there?"
"That they arrived at Tazuna's house, boss?"
"...Ah, never mind then. Thought you said something else."
"Shall I send for someone, boss?"
Gato pushed up on the bridge of his glasses, a wicked smirk forming as he did. "All of them."
The messenger faltered. "Say what, boss?"
"Send for all of them," he elaborated. "It's about time we put an end to this foolish little rebellion once and for all."
Oh, he could hardly wait. Just imagine the look on old Tazuna's face when he showed up with his entire mafia in tow. That was sure to crush any lingering hope for a better tomorrow that he and the rest of the villagers might still be entertaining. And then, as nice big cherry on top, he'd have his men blow up that damnable bridge.
Hah! The resulting misery was going to be simply priceless!
xxx
From the edge of the staircase, Inari glared down at the shinobi that his grandpa had brought home.
The oldest one was off in a corner, his nose buried in an orange-covered book and ignoring everything else around him.
The boy with the belt connecting his pant legs together was pacing around the room like a caged animal, his mouth occasionally moving, though Inari couldn't make out what he was saying.
The other boy was sitting passively at the table, where his mom had directed him after he'd tried to help her with dinner. The boy had seen her chopping vegetables and, pulling out a small butcher knife of his own, had attempted to do the same. Except that the first little chop he made had cut through not only the vegetable in front of him, but the cutting board and the countertop itself. Tsunami had politely shooed him away after that.
The girl was sprawled on the floor, lying on her stomach with her chin propped up on her hands, kicking her feet up behind her as she tried to teach a little squirrel she'd befriended outside how to dance. Bizarre, but not half as bizarre as seeing the little critter actually listening to the girl, and performing a very competent pirouette, in his completely unprofessional opinion.
He still couldn't understand what his grandpa had been thinking. What were a bunch of kids going to do against someone like Gato? It made him angry to see just how desperate the old man had become. Why couldn't he just accept the fact that there was nothing they could do? He was just making a fool of himself and everyone knew it.
And worst of all, those idiot ninja, who weren't even that much older than him, actually sounded excited about fighting Gato. Well, two seemed excited, the other just kind of sat there...
"God, this is boring!" Sasuke announced loudly, startling Sakura's squirrel and causing it to run away. Sakura pouted; now she was bored, too.
"This village sucks!" Sasuke continued. "Let's go kill that tyrant and go home already."
Inari couldn't stand it anymore. "You guys are idiots!"
Tazuna's body went rigid in horror.
Kakashi's eye peeked up over the top of his book.
"Gato is way stronger than you are! Ignorant people like you wouldn't stand a chance against him!"
Tsunami shook her head, having heard the same thing from her son before, and continued cooking, completely ignorant to the danger her son was placing himself in.
"Why don't you just get out of here? You'll just get yourselves killed if you stick around!"
Slowly, the heads of the three demon children turned to face him, and Inari fought the sudden urge to go cower under his bed. Being subjected to that deceptively cheerful sociopathic grin, that twisted sneer that promised nightmarish pain to it's recipient, and those empty-eyes that bored deep into the very recesses of his soul, the little boy sudden realized that maybe Gato wasn't the scariest thing in the world after all.
Thankfully, before any of them had a chance to prove his supposition right, a group of men burst into the house.
"Tazuna! Gato's here!"
Tazuna's worry for his grandson was temporarily sidetracked. "Say what!"
"He and his men are headed to the bridge. They've got dynamite!"
"No! All of our hard work-!" He turned frantically to the Konohan team. "Please, stop them for us!"
Sasuke gave him a sideways glance. "Are you talking 'stop them' in a permanent sense?"
"Yes, fine, whatever! Kill the hell out of them! Go wild!"
The Uchiha's familiar smirk returned. "I knew there was a reason I kept you alive."
Sakura ran over and hugged the old man. "You're the best, grandpa-san! So much nicer than Sensei."
Kakashi muttered some unkind words from his corner before slipping his book into his pocket and moving to catch up with his enthused students, who had already charged headlong out of the house.
Behind him, Naruto calmly gathered his lantern and followed. Slowly.
And it wasn't until about two minutes later that Tazuna realized he'd forgotten something vitally important.
xxx
"Hurry it up!" Gato barked. "Break open those crates! Spread that dynamite around! I want everything in place when those fools show up!"
"Are we really going to need all of this, boss?" one of the mooks asked. "There's enough explosives here to send half the village up in smoke."
"Of course! We're making a point here that we won't be tolerating anymore resistance, and the quickest way to do that is by crushing their spirits completely."
"Yes boss, but what about those ninja that were seen escorting Tazuna here?"
Gato scoffed. "Please! The scout said there was only four of them, and that all but one of them were children. They'd have to be completely insane to try anything against all of us!"
Three loud shots rang out, and three mooks hit the floor, grey matter leaking from the new holes in their heads.
Gato and the approximately one hundred ninety-seven men he had left, stopped in their tracks and looked to the head of the bridge, where a young girl in a stood twirling a large hand-gun on her finger. A sudden wind picked up, catching the ends of her blood-red dress and blowing a few visible strands of pink hair out from beneath her hood, which had been pulled down to just above her eyes. Those who were close enough to see the grin on her face could tell that it was definitely not innocent. Not even deceptively so, for that matter.
With deliberate slowness, she reached into her picnic basket and pulled out a matching gun with her other hand.
"Shannaro," she whispered, the wind carrying her words just far enough for everyone on the bridge to hear.
The first mook turned back to Gato. "I know I never tell you this, boss...but I've always hated you."
"Well don't just stand there, you idiots!" Gato shouted to his men. "Kill her and get back to w-ulk?"
Gato cut himself off when he felt an arm drape itself over his shoulders. He was about to yell at the fool who distracted him when he noticed the vicious talon-like claws on the person's hand. Slowly, his gaze dragged up the hand to the white shirt-sleeve, then turned to the other side, where he came face to face with sharp eyes shadowed by black hair and a smirk that matched the girl's almost perfectly.
"Hi," the boy greeted lightly.
Gato stared, a bit befuddled as to what was happening. "Um...hi?"
"You know, I kind of like you," the boy informed him.
The tyrant still couldn't move. Neither could anyone else, it seemed. The situation was so surreal, it felt like it might not even be happening. "That's...good?"
"You know what I like best about you?" he continued.
"...No?"
"Your screams."
"...Wha-?" Gato spontaneously combusted.
And he screamed.
A lot.
And Sasuke liked the screams.
A lot.
Finally, Gato's blackened body stopped flailing about on the ground, and Sasuke turned to face the mob. "Next?"
That seemed to break the spell that everyone had fallen under, and things became really chaotic, really quickly.
xxx
From his vantage point, Kakashi watched as the little monsters tore through Gato's ranks with euphoric glee. It helped that the mob couldn't decide whether they would rather run away or avenge their boss, which led to a lot of stumbling and crashing into one another.
Normally, he'd be content to stay right where he was and let the kids work out their pent up aggressions, but as a jounin and a (reluctant) sensei, he also felt that he should probably be there to assist if it became necessary. He knew that they were perfectly capable of taking care of themselves, but they were still outnumbered a hundred to one and there was no telling when someone might get a lucky shot on one of them.
That decided, he leapt into the fray and began casually taking out opponents while keeping plenty of cannon fodder between himself and his students.
About a minute and seventy-something bodies later, he was distracted by the sight of Sasuke leaping over the edge of the bridge without warning. Turning his head the other way, he barely caught a glimpse of Sakura doing the same on the other side. He found this odd, since there were still people left to kill and he hadn't seen either of them get hit, so what could make...
And then he heard a noise that he hadn't noticed before due to all the screaming and mayhem. It sounded something akin to a nest of angry snakes. Gato's men obviously heard it to, as the remainders of them stopped their panicking long enough to track the sound to its source.
The source being the six large crates of dynamite strung about among them, all of who's fuses had been lit by a series of very accurately aimed trails of blue fire.
"Well," Kakashi said, defeat creeping into his voice. "Fu-"
xxx
From the shoreline, Sasuke and Sakura sat watching the results of Sasuke's handywork like it was some gruesome fireworks display. Sasuke wished the agonizing screams would have lasted a little longer, while Sakura wished that Sasuke would just push her down and take her right there in the rock and mud by the light of the burning debris.
A ways behind them, Naruto, who had finally arrived on the scene, shook his head. He wished his friends wouldn't be so eager to kill and destroy all the time. If they kept things up like this he wasn't sure how much longer he'd be able to ignore the call of the vengeful flames.
Even further back behind him, Tazuna and the rest of the village stood in awe and horror, as the dust settled to reveal a large portion of their bridge completely obliterated, and the parts still intact covered with the remains of their former oppressors . They weren't entirely sure if they should be happy or heartbroken.
And from the sea, a singed and slightly battered Kakashi waded toward shore, his eye never leaving the placated face of the youngest Uchiha. Stepping out of the water, he stalked over and glared down at him.
"Why?" he asked, his voice low and a little unhinged.
Sasuke gave him a bored look. "Hey, killing them one at a time was becoming a pain. Much longer and they would have started running away. This way I made sure to get all of them at once."
"And you couldn't have warned me that you were setting off hundreds of explosives in the general area?"
"And how was I supposed to warn you without warning all of them as well?"
"Duh, sensei," Sakura added.
"Besides, you don't look nearly as crispy as you did the last time we blew you up," Sasuke informed him.
"...I hate you both," he stated before walking off to find some gauze, and wondering if ol' Danzo still had any Root positions available.
xxx
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Next time: Back to Konoha, and a chapter where nobody dies or gets maimed. There might not even be any property damage. And yet, somehow, trauma still accumulates.
'Til then.
LL