AN: I have almost a 100 reviews for only 3 chapters, that's insanely kind of you all. Your words of enjoyment and excitement at the previous and coming chapters of this story are touching. I can't thank you all enough for you support. I am truly touched and I hope this story lives up to all your expectations.

So finally its Bella's POV, for those who cry easily, I recommend tissues (I am one of those people).

Oh I should also mention I don't own anything, unfortunately.

Anyway, enjoy...

A Drop in the Ocean

Chapter Four- He's Gone

Bella POV

He's gone...he's gone...he's gone

I opened my eyes.

Always alone

I took in a breath.

Never wanted

The air was knocked right out of me.

Never good enough

I wanted to breathe but I didn't seem to be able to.

He's gone

The suffocating black hole in my heart was back.

He wasn't there to repair it either because it was himthat had made it. Or maybe he hadn't, maybe he'd just torn out the stitches that he used to hold my heart together!

No, he had healed my broken heart and then I had given it to him willingly because I realised that while repairing my heart he had taken it from me. It wasn't mine, it was his for the taking and he had taken it happily.

Then he let it go, and it broke along with everything else within me.

When you drop a glass or a plate to the ground it makes a loud crashing sound. When a window shatters, a table leg breaks, or when a picture falls off the wall it makes a noise. But as for a heart, when that breaks, it's completely silent. You would think as it's so important it would make the loudest noise in the whole world, or even have some sort of ceremonious sound like the gong of a cymbal or the ringing of a bell. But it's silent and you almost wish there was a noise to distract you from the pain.

With my arms wrapped around my waist I sat up.

Hold it together

I wrapped the blanket someone had given me tightly around my shoulders.

You'll be ok

I looked around, I was alone but I was home.

Alone, always alone

I heard voices, angry voices. I walked to the door which was slightly ajar, for a moment I consider running back to the sofa, curling up and letting the pain take me but something made me open the door, something made me step onto the porch.

He was there; his face bloody but still beautiful, so so beautiful.

Not yours

"Jacob," I whispered before I could stop myself but as his name fell from my lips I felt the hole in my heart grow. I was whimpering mess before I knew it, I wanted to look away, I wanted him to go away but I couldn't help but stare and wish he would step closer.

It'll always be you he had once told me. He lied.

Her, it's her

She was forever sketched into my memory, the girl who stole my future. She would have his children, she would be the one wrapped in his warm arms at night. It would be her he would love forever.

"Bella, please-" I didn't hear the rest because the full force of everything hit me at once.

My emotions were running wild, I didn't know what to do or say. I didn't know whether to look at him or through him. I didn't know anything.

So I took a pitiful road, I begged.

"Please don't let her take you from me" I stepped down the porch steps towards him and the Pack who I'd only just realised were there.

He shook his head his eyes pleading for me to understand. "No. I don't want to..."

"Stay with me!" I begged only a foot away from him but I couldn't get any closer, the pack was blocking me.

Move

Silence followed. My heart pounded, I could hear my blood pumping through my veins. I watched as Jacob stood staring, not at me but through me, he looked like he was fighting with himself.

Then he looked at me and I saw it, the same cool none caring look that had broken my heart for the very first time. The same look Edward had given me in the woods before he left me.

"I can't."

He walked away.

He doesn't want me

My breathing picked up.

He's not even going to try

My knees gave out just as a half scream half sob escaped my chest, bubbled in my throat then slipped past my lips.

I was caught by large, hot hands.

Not his

I was picked up. People whispered around me, or maybe they were just too far away for me to hear. It didn't matter though; I didn't want to hear anything else.

He's gone

A Drop in the Ocean

We all get lost once in a while, sometimes by choice, sometimes due to forces beyond our control. When we learn what it is our soul needs to learn, the path presents itself. Sometimes we see the way out but wander further and deeper despite ourselves; the fear, the anger or the sadness preventing us returning.

Sometimes we prefer to be lost and wandering, sometimes it's easier.

Sometimes we find our own way out.

But regardless, always, we are found.

I was lost, it was so much easier wandering further and deeper into myself and blocking out all life around me, I took that over pain. I was aware but I didn't care about what was happening. I spent my time wondering if I'd done things differently would my life have been better. But if I'd done it differently I would have never had the time I had with him, and with everything that had happened in my life, I couldn't even imagine loosing the way I felt about him. Not ever. He was my sun, the ray's of light that broke through even on the cloudiest of days. He was the light at the end of the tunnel.

I always thought that he and I would be together for life, for me it was a done deal and it had seemed he had felt the same but sometimes things and people just go. Just like that.

My sun wouldn't shine, not for me at least, never again. There would be no light at the end of the tunnel, he had switched it off; taken it when he had left.

He had gone.

But people can appear just as quickly as they can disappear.

Paul found me. Paul found a way through to me when no one else could. He held my hand and led me out of the darkness and despair; he brought me back.

Paul's voice broke through the walls I'd built; his tone was rough and wild just like his personality. It sparked interest deep inside of me, a fragment of a memory of a time when I smiled.

"You need to do this, okay Bella. Breathe, eat, sleep, wake up, and then do it all over again until one day it's just not as hard anymore. I promise it'll get easier but I need you to try." He whispered to me and with those few words I let the darkness recede completely.

I met his eyes with mine.

I was blinded with a beautiful smile.

"Welcome back Bella,"...

AN: So Bella's POV, do we like it? The next one or two chapters will be in other peoples POV's because I want to get a perspective of time and the pack's lives and emotions while Bella was in her 'zombie' stage. Do you want any particular POV's? let me know if you do.