here's a HUGE thank you to both sockstar and lovelyMESS for reviewing faithfully! it truly means the world to me, and your words of encouragement mean everything to me. :)

THANKS!

and now, on with the next chapter!

Reality

She was living with him. They weren't together, but she needed a place to stay… which meant she was in the loft 24/7—eating his food, stealing his shirts, and leaving his towels on the floor in his bathroom. But it wasn't like living with his sister, who was meticulous to a fault. There was now a purple razor next to his in the shower, a circlet of pills in his medicine cabinet, and all of the collars of his shirts now smelled like cinnamon.

Alive

She drives him crazy in ways he never knew were possible (and he's dated some pretty crazy chicks). It doesn't matter that she's gone all day and night—no note, no call, no clue to where she's run off to. And when she does finally return, he should be pissed, should be furious with her, but she waltzes in, throws him a smirk and a "Hey handsome, what goes on?" and he can't feel anything but alive.

Fight

He gets it now, why she's always picking fights with people. He never actually fought with her before (because he was Carly's brother and she was Carly's friend) but now they're Spencer&Sam and she's really making him livid. But her rosy face and vibrant eyes are making it difficult for him to concentrate on his argument, and she notices as well because she settles herself onto his lap and roughly slants her mouth over his. He didn't understand it before, but he does now and the fighting makes the very air between them thrum.

Naked

They've each had sex before—just not with each other. He shouldn't be nervous (because he's not a sixteen year old virgin, for Christ's sake) but he is nervous and he really hopes that his apprehension isn't apparent on his face. It's one thing to merely say naked or think naked, but then to realize that it's real (she's real), that he can see the slight indentations her bra has left across her back and the smattering of freckles on her arms (Jesus, he's seen her arms before, why is his heart racing?)… it's enough to make him hope that she's just as staggered as he is.

Space

She's found a way to sneak into every aspect of his life that when she finally leaves, he feels so hollow that it aches. He never expected anyone to fit as well as she did with him (who would've expected it'd be his sister's best friend) and he certainly took her for granted. All that he's left with now is a loft that echoes and a bed that's too big.

I Know

There are words that Sam wishes she could say, but she's been conditioned all her life not to say what's truly in her heart. While she's had close friends who mean the world to her, she's never felt that she has deserved their devotion. She's been trained (through the negligence of her parents) that she's done nothing to earn love. So when the words are finally on the tip of her tongue, and her eyes are watering and she hates herself for it, Spencer threads his fingers through her hair and rests his forehead against hers, whispering, "I know, Sam, I know".

Devious

It borders on ridiculous; how the mere curve of her mouth and defiant raise of her chin can make him think the most devious, traitorous thoughts.

Murmur

The loft is usually noisy—neither of them are quiet people. He shouts everything in his perpetual excitement and she's a professional at turning every disagreement into a screaming match. But when she lies with him in the dark, tangling limbs together and whispering against his skin (to which he replies just as softly), he finds that this is just as in character for the both of them.

Garden

He loves her, but he worries. She doesn't realize that there are so many guys out there who are better for her than he is—guys her age with steady jobs and ten year plans and picket fences. All he has is a loft and a motorcycle and a penchant for sculpting. So she assures him that she doesn't want the garden and the golden retriever and the Dutch colonial—she wants him and the loft and the motorcycle and all of the sculptures.

Push

The moment things get difficult, her instinct is to push him aside and to run as far as she can, as fast as she can. But he's also an old pro at avoiding issues, so he pushes her right back. She's taken by surprise (he loves it when he one-ups her and can see the proof on her face) and her instinct to flee turns to a desire to fight. Fighting he can handle—it's the running away he can't.

and that's chapter four! what did you think? drop me a line and share your thoughts :)

-fandrastic