Hello everyone. A new chapter, this time taking a look at Chris and Meg at Spica, as well as several other characters. A major role in this chapter is for our resident Miss Awesome, aka Chikaru. I know I said in the introduction of 'pining for the fjords' that the ChikaruxShion pairing was a oneshot, but I liked the pairing so much I decided to give them a second go. :) I hope you'll like it.

Also, due to popular request, the Evil Monkey will be having a bit part as well. :)

Everybody Loves Yaya

Chapter 4 : Meanwhile, in an abandoned warehouse at Spica...

-"Ahum,"- Shion, the perpetually scowling Spica student council president opened the meeting. Of course, the entire council consisted only of herself, Kaname and Momomi, both of whom were quite pissed at having been disturbed during a rather private moment to attend this meeting. -"I've called you all to this emergency student council meeting to discuss an urgent matter. As you all know, we have two foreign guests staying with us and, as all of us has found out, they are far below Spica standards. Due to their efforts, or rather lack thereof, Spica's grade averages have plummeted, and due to their actions, Spica has had to endure many embarrassments. The bird-bath incident shall never be wiped from our minds."-

The whole council, again consisting only of Kaname and Momomi, collectively shuddered at the mention of the word 'bird-bath'.

-"Yes, well,"- Momomi spoke up. -"I still don't understand why we've allowed a boy to enter a girl's school. It's completely unprecedented in the history of Astraea Hill!"-

Shion sighed heavily, rose from her seat to dramatically stare out the window in Alfred Hitchcock style. -"I've told you, remember? And if you had bothered to keep attendance and actually read the minutes of our meetings you'd know too."-

Momomi gritted her teeth at the accusation while Shion continued. -"Once more, just for you, then. A mix-up at the principal's office is to blame. The secretary thought 'Chris' was a girl's name, and when they finally caught on, he was already here. The Sister decided we couldn't let him pay the price for our principal's incompetence and leave him to fend for himself in a strange country for six months. I very reluctantly agreed at the time, but if I had known what would happen, I'd have kicked his fat useless ass out in the street without remorse myself and kicked his sister out too for good measure."-

Kaname scraped her throat. -"So what do you expect us to do about it? The Griffins are our responsibility now. The Sister made that quite clear."-

-"Miator is nipping at our heels!"- Shion slammed her fist on the table. -"And Spica will not bear any more embarrassments, I will not allow it! I shall speak with Chris Griffin to point out his duties to the school and warn him that he shall face the consequences if he does not comply. Kaname, I want you to use your 'special talent' to break Meg Griffin. To bring her in line. Redirect her attention to you and manipulate her to excel, Kaname. If the sister excels, the brother shall follow."-

-"But... it's Meg-san."-

-"Do it! For honor! For SPICA!"-

-"But... it's MEG!"- Kaname shuddered.

Momomi was quick to comfort her love. -"It'll be okay. I'll be waiting for you with a hot bath standing by. We'll get through this. "

-"It's Meg... I don't want to."- Kaname sighed. -"They don't make water hot enough to scrub off MEG! "

As Meg entered her room, she was surprised to hear whiny Violin solo's floating through the air. It was odd, because she was sure she'd turned off the radio. She was alone in her room, because for some strange reason, the girl she dormed with had inexplicably jumped off a nearby cliff five minutes after meeting her and the principal was reluctant to dorm another girl with her after reading the dead girl's as-of-yet undisclosed suicide note. Something about suddenly having lost all will to live...

She found a stately, gorgeous girl with short black hair staring intently at her. She recognized her as an elder student called Kaname.

"Yes?" Meg asked. "Hey! Oh... My... God... You're Kaname!"

"Meg-san," said Kaname as she took a step closer. "You shouldn't leave your door unlocked. Such is dangerous. As my love is dangerous. As I am dangerous." She grinned and flipped her hair in a semi-evil yet incredibly sexy fashion.

Meg found herself transfixed under Kaname's piercing gaze. "Meg-san," Kaname narrowed her eyes as she pressed Meg against the wall with both arms and her face hovered so close to Meg's that their noses all but touched. "Let me tell you the story of Abraham Lincoln. Now, Abraham Lincoln was faced with a difficult decision. He was voted into office as a representative to all Americans, but the abolishionist course he was supporting was quickly tearing the nation apart. But he did the only thing he could do despite..."

Suddenly there was an acute change in Kaname's mood. Revulsion was evident on her features as she turned away from Meg and supported herself against the wall. -"Oh, god, I can't do this. I can't do this. Not even for Spica."-

"I was wondering when it was my turn," Meg husked. "I've been hearing the stories from the other girls, and if even half of those are true... Rrrrowllll..."

Kaname gulped when Meg locked the door behind her. "Come and molest me, Kaname-bear!"

Her incredible sense of dignity finally shattering, Kaname screamed like a little girl and, without any hesitation at all, ran to the window and jumped out. She landed with a thud and a spash one floor below. Her body ached but at least she was safe.

-'Figures'-, Kaname thought as she regarded her soiled uniform. -'One mud puddle on the entire compound and I happen to land it in. Great...'-

She sat down near a rosebed and let out a deep breath. She'd certainly be stiff and sore in the morning, but at least she was away from that... Meg.

Or was she?

Kaname gulped when she heard something land in the mud-puddle behind her. Remembering a scene from an old Arnold Schwarzenegger movie called 'Predator' which she'd watched with Momomi this summer holiday, she pressed her back into the dirt of the rosebed and kept completely still, letting her unwanted mud camouflage do the rest.

"Kaname?" Meg-san spoke as she looked around. "Where are you? Here, Kaname, Kaname, kaname..."

Kaname almost let out a whimper when Meg looked in her general direction. -'Momomi,'- Kaname was overcome with a sense of deep regret. -'I never told you that I love you.'-

Meg seemed disappointed and slowly stomped off, apparently looking for her. As soon as Meg was out of earshot, Kaname finally dared to breathe again. -'Oh, god, that was awful. So awful. Momomi... I gotta find Momomi... Gotta get cleaned up and get the hell away from...'-

"Oh, there you are!"

"Tonzura koite!" Kaname screamed, cursing inwardly for making out with Momomi during most of the movie. If she had paid more attention at the time, she'd know what to do now to get rid of Meg. Instead, she just ran for dear life.

Chikaru made her way to the cafetaria of the Strawberry Dorms. Today was strawberry cake night, and she was sure to run into Nagisa-chan and Tamao-chan. They had a lot to discuss, as Nagisa was preparing a surprise birthday party for Shizuma at the summer home. And because Shizuma no longer lived in the Strawberry Dorms, they wouldn't have to worry about Shizuma accidentally finding out, so they could discuss the details in public.

Just as she rounded about the corner, she saw Chris Griffin standing in the hallway, looking dopey as he usually did. Chikaru shook her head. When Chris and Meg had come to the Strawberry Dorms two months ago, everybody was shocked to learn that Chris was actually a boy. This was completely unprecedented, but considering 99.99 of the student body wasn't interested in boys, he was considered harmless. Still, he was a social pariah. Almost all of Spica loathed him, almost all of Miator avoided him like the plague and even Lulim students were generally stand-offish.

Chikaru shook her head. This was usually how Astraea Hill dealt with problems: they were swept under the rug and ignored until the problem had grown so large in size they were forced to deal with it. It was like putting a lot of girls in a tent with an elephant, while all the girls blissfully ignored the elephant right up until the moment it would start to stampede all over them.

Shion had been very negligent, in Chikaru's opinion, in doing her duty as school council president to take care of Chris. As a result Chikaru had taken it upon herself to take Chris under her wing to help him in this strange land, often explaining things, helping him with homework and translating for him when needed. She also kept involving him with Lulim's club life so that he wouldn't get lonely. In fact, she had even founded the 'Cheer Up Chris'-club at Lulim, and even though Kizuna, Remon and Kagome had been quite wary about allowing him into their social circle, they found out he was silly enough to fit right into their quirky little group.

"Good day, Chris-kun," Chikaru greeted. "Are you having a good time today?"

"Oh hi, Chicky," Chris greeted the person who might be his only true friend at the Strawberry Dorms. "Yeah, I think I'm okay. I was just thinking about stuff."

"What's that, Chris-kun?"

"We're in Japan-land, right? And people here all speak Japanese, right? And this textbook is about French, right?"

"Uh, right," Chikaru said. "I follow you."

"So, if all these people speak Japanese. And this book is in French, then why's the word 'French' printed on it in English?"

Chikaru took the book. Indeed, the French book had an English title even though the only languages within it were French and Japanese. "Hm," she said. "You know, that is weird. I shall submit this to the Secrets Club and find out all about it!"

"Maybe it was evil English aliens, like that guy Scorpius. Or Dr. Doom!"

Chikaru smiled. Even though she didn't quite understand what made Chris tick, he was quite endearing. One of his more fun habit was to Americanise the names of many of the Japanese girls here. Tamao-chan was 'Tammy', Nagisa-chan was 'Natalie', Kizuna-chan was 'Kelly', Kagome-chan was 'Kathy', Remon-chan was 'Remona' and Shion had been renamed 'Sharon'.

Chikaru shook her head. It was ridiculous that Shion made Chris follow tradition and made him wear the Spica school uniform. At least, it would have been nice for all parties involved if pants could have been added to the uniform.

"Oh," Chris said. "Yeah, it's still a bit windy around the legs. But I don't mind."

"Far away from home, strange environment, only boy at a girl's school and loathed by Shion-sama," Chikaru shook her head. "I don't know how you cope, Chris-kun."

Chris shrugged. "Oh, it's okay, Chicky. At least I'm away from the Evil Monkey that lives in my closet."

Chikaru frowned as the two of them started to walk to the dining hall. "Excuse me, Chris-kun? Forgive me, I think something was lost in translation."

At that moment, a mud-covered Kaname came running down the hallway, screaming bloody murder. In close pursuit was Chris' sister Meg. "You coward!" Meg shouted after Kaname. "Come back and finish what you started! Can't handle a real woman, can you?!"

Chikaru and Chris looked on for a moment, shrugged and then walked on. "Chris-kun," Chikaru started. "Maybe you can help us plan Nagisa's party for Shizuma."

"Oh, I know!" Chris exclaimed. "Natalie could jump out of a giant cake! Cause Natalie likes cake and Shitzu likes Natalie. So if Natalie jumped out of the cake, they'd have something they both like."

Chikaru nodded. "That's a fun idea, Chris-kun. You should tell Nagisa when we meet with her. Oh, but, if you want to come to the party, you really should stop calling Shizuma-sama 'Shitzu'."

Back in Quahog, two tired girls were ready to go to sleep. Tsubomi was in her bed with a small nightlight on, sitting up and reading her book. Yaya was standing in front of the mirror brushing her hair, dressed in pajama's. When she finished brushing, she walked towards the bed while briefly singing a tune:

"Fighting evil by moonlight

Winning love by daylight

Never running from a real fight

She is the one named Sailor Moon..."

-"That dub is so stupid,"- Tsubomi shook her head. -"Mind if I read a bit more, Yaya-chan? I'll keep the light on for a little bit."-

-"Okay. Kiss,"- Yaya smiled. The two girls brushed lips for a moment. -"Good night, Tsubomi-chan."-

-"Good night,"- Tsubomi said while Yaya crawled into bed and rolled on her side so she wouldn't be bothered by Tsubomi's reading light.

Two pages later, Tsubomi heard some stumbling from the closet. She sighed and put away her book. Soon enough, the closet door flew open, and out came the Evil Monkey, a snarl already etched on his primate features.

Tsubomi gritted her teeth and pointed directly at him, sheer intensity in her eyes. Severely beaten to the punch, the Evil Monkey pouted heavily and withdrew back into the closet.

-"Yeah, I thought so too,"- Tsubomi scowled and turned off her reading light before lying down and passing into peaceful slumber.

Amane and Hikari stepped into the cafetaria, hoping to find some of the strawberry cakes had been left over. The two of them had spent more time in the greenhouse than expected and taking care of flowers was hungry work. When they had finally managed to tear themselves away from the greenhouse to go to the cafetaria, they found only one piece left, which they decided to share.

-"Nagisa-kun seems animated today,"- Amane said as she regarded Nagisa, Chikaru, Tamao, Chiyo and Chris Griffin sitting in a booth talking.

-"Oh, haven't you heard?"- Hikari asked. -"Nagisa-chan's planning a surprise birthday party for Shizuma-sama. I think they're brainstorming for ideas."-

-"Hm,"- Amane said as she heard Chris Griffin suggesting hiring Motorhead as the band. -"Isn't Shizuma-sama's birthday in another month?"-

Hikari took a sip from her tea. -"Yes, but Nagisa-chan wants to prepare it well in advance. I understand that. She doesn't want anything to go wrong. But, uhm, knowing Nagisa-chan, everything will go wrong anyway."-

Hikari's thoughts drifted to the big blown up photograph hanging on the bulletin board. On the photograph, Tsubomi and Yaya posed with their guest family. Yaya was smiling broadly and was giving the peace-sign. She looked to be very laid-back, with her cap back to front and wearing baggy trousers and a red tank-top. Behind her and smiling just as broadly was an overweight man with glasses, who had also placed his hands on Yaya's shoulders. Tsubomi stood to his right, scowling (as usual) at the man, but despite of this, she seemed content. Oddly enough, a white dog standing on two legs had his paw on Tsubomi's shoulder. A friendly red-haired woman holding a rather dangerous looking baby finished the scene.

-"Thinking about Yaya-san?"- Amane asked.

Hikari smiled back. -"Look at her, Amane. Yaya-chan looks so happy. I miss her terribly, yes, but I'm so glad for her too. I never meant to, but we were making her unhappy."-

-"I know,"- Amane sighed. -"Is that why you recommended her to represent Spica in the foreign exchange program? It wasn't hard to figure out."-

Hikari seemed startled for a moment. -"Please, never tell Yaya-chan! I... I just thought it would be good for her to get some distance and... I feel guilty for making Yaya-chan so unhappy. And it also gives a chance for love between Yaya-chan and Tsubomi-chan to blossom."-

-"Hm, yes. Those two. Nobody fights as much as those two do without ulterior motives,"- Amane shook her head. -"I hope everything works out for them. Hm..."-

-"Something wrong, Amane?"-

-"Maybe it's just me, but if you look closely at the tree in the background, you can see a man with a strangely deformed chin looking in at Yaya-chan and Tsubomi-chan with a pair of binoculars."-

-"Really? I don't see it,"- Hikari replied.

Amane turned to the photograph. -"You sorta have to squint your eyes and look past the picture, like with those colored pictures in which you can see a spaceship if you look carefully."-

-"You know, I never do see the spaceship in those pictures. Anyway, I'm more concerned about the revolver that the baby is pointing at his mother's chest."-

-"Hm. Is Quahog in Texas by any chance?"-

Later that day, Shion walked into the cathedral, eager to give Chris Griffin a piece of her mind about his below average grades at school. Though he was a Gaijin, surely he had to understand that with his lack of performance he shamed not only himself but the entirety of Spica as well. And if he wouldn't understand, she would MAKE him understand.

Shion stomped across the isle, where she already saw the ridiculous display of Chris Griffin trying to sing with the choir. He stuck out like a sore thumb between the elegant girls of the choir, and his voice was akin to a cheese-grater rasping over the surface of a zinc bucket.

Oh, who was she trying to kid, the guy was a blithering idiot. It was incomprehensible to Shion. He'd been in Japan for two months straight and the only Japanese he'd picked up was 'Goku Dragonball', one of which wasn't even a japanese word to begin with.

Already, the angelic voices of St. Spica choir could be heard echoing through the cathedral. Shion was loathe to think that Chris Griffin had taken Yaya's place in the choir for all of six months. His voice was certainly jarring enough to break glass.

"Kedakaki yuri no shiro no gotoku

Fushigi bara no rei ni gotoku

Aoba no nobe no midori no gotoku

ten no kisaki wa uruwashiki emu"

Just as Shion approached, Chris Griffin got into the singing mood and jumped out of formation for an impromptu metal solo:

"Evil monkey holds the key.

Evil monkey's gonna get me!

I'm hiding underneath my sheets,

For fear he'll point and shout at me!

Evil, Evil Monkey!"

Chris finished his solo and, much to the consternation of the already confused choir, decided to make a stage-dive.

Shion barely had time to whisper 'mommy' when the tiny girl was faced with the bulk of Chris Griffin barreling towards her.

Chikaru lay in bed, hugging her beloved girlfriend from behind. She was quite grateful that council presidents were offered private rooms, because it meant that the two lovers could meet often in the privacy of their own bedrooms.

The raven-haired girl decided to have a little fun. She fished a red ribbon from her hair and gently tied to in the hair of her drowsy girlfriend.

-"Nh, whacha doin'?"- Shion mumbled in her state of near-sleep. Chikaru giggled when she saw the end result of her cheeky prank. Shion's blonde hair was now decorated with a red ribbon, tied to the side of her head.

Shion stretched slightly and yawned briefly. Chikaru pulled up the duvet and neatly covered the both of them, while Shion took the opportunity to curl up against her beloved as she was about to drift off to dreamland.

Earlier today, the unconscious Shion had been rushed to the nurse's office after Chris-kun had 'accidentally' landed on top of her. Thankfully, the Spican president had come out of the ordeal with only a few angry bruises and a sprained ankle. Though Chikaru felt very sorry for her beloved Shion, the bruises did put her in an excellent position to 'kiss it and make it better' during their lovemaking.

-"Feel better?"- Chikaru asked in between kissing a trail along the other girl's neck.

-"Much,"- Shion's face was beautified by a blissful smile.

-"There's something I wanted to talk to you about, Shion-koi,"- Chikaru asked carefully.

-"Hm?"-

-"About Chris Griffin."-

Shion stiffened for a moment. And then she was wide awake. -"You want to talk about him, NOW?! Nice timing, Chikaru!"-

-"I had to catch you in a good mood,"- Chikaru chuckled. Stupendously good lovemaking usually put Shion in a good mood. -"I want you to transfer him to Lulim."-

-"What? Why?!"-

-"I feel Spica isn't really his kind of school. I think he'll be happier in the laid-back environment of Lulim. He might not be the smartest person in the world, but he certainly does not deserve to become involved in the rivalry between Spica and Miator."-

Shion sighed and shook her head. She rolled to her other side to look Chikaru in the eyes as both girls lay their heads down on the pillow.

-"You keep sticking your neck out for students in trouble. You know what your problem is?"- she smirked. -"Your heart is just too damn big."-

-"Hey, there's room for you in there, after all, Shion-koi,"- Chikaru kissed the tip of Shion's nose.

-"You want him? You got him,"- Shion sighed. -"We will keep his sister Meg in Spica, though. We will lose face if both our transfer students leave us for another school. Seriously, Sweetness, you're always looking out for a stray."-

-"Chris-kun is harmless."-

-"Harmless?!"- Shion blinked. -"Will you look at me?! He was like a low IQ torpedo slamming into my fragile frame!"-

-"He didn't mean to do that. Admit it. And he carried you to the nurse's office all by himself."-

Shion sighed heavily. -"Alright. He's your responsibility now. May Lulim survive Chris Griffin."-

Chikaru traced Shion's lips with her fingertips before leaning in for a kiss. Though Chikaru had indeed been looking out for Chris, she had to admit to an ulterior motive behind this transfer. Shion had been so stressed out lately that Chikaru had been getting most worried about her. More than anything, Shion loathed losing. And if Spica was losing ground to Miator, Shion'd do anything in her power to turn the tide, even at the cost of her own peace of mind and health. Hopefully, Spica's grade averages would rise again and Chikaru could stop worrying... both about her friend Chris and her beloved Shion.

The two girls held each other for a moment, before both drifted off to blissful sleep.

Two days later, Kaname was on the prowl.

She carefully looked about the corner of the dorms and found the hallway empty. Her many sources had informed her that Meg was in PE-class at the moment and thus away from her bedroom.

After her fateful escape, she had found out that she had lost the bowtie of her school uniform. She and Momomi had been looking everywhere for it, but came to the conclusion that she might have lost it while jumping out of the window and that it might still be in Meg's room.

She had already been scolded once by the Sister about her missing bowtie and she had decided she'd be buggered before she'd allow Meg to have anything that was hers, and had decided to take it back.

Kaname crept to the door with a carefully crafted skeleton key. She had made it herself in her second year after lifting the key from the groundskeeper and pressing it into a bar of soap. Some experimentation in arts class had fielded her with the key that could unlock every single door at Astraea Hill. She'd go in, look for her bowtie, get out and re-lock the door before anyone would notice she was even here.

Not surprisingly, she found Meg's door locked, but the lock quickly fell to Kaname's cunning. She entered the room... only to wish that she hadn't mere seconds later. Some things were best left to blissful ignorance, as Kaname found out.

Kaname let the key fall from her hands as she started with open mouth. There was a good reason that the door had been locked: all around her hung pictures taken of her. Kaname at the tennis court, in class, in the locker room, in the forest, at the Kendo club, at the library, at the lake... everywhere. There were also pictures of her with Momomi, but apparently Meg had snipped her own head from photos and crudely pasted them over Momomi's head.

Perhaps the most disturbing was when she had found her bow-tie: right on top of a makeshift shrine, complete with burning candles and a radio which played the 'William Tell Overture'. Most disturbing was a large blown-up picture of herself and Kaname. Meg had written the word 'love' several times all over the image of Kaname, and the word 'Die' many more times over the image of Momomi. Furthermore, the image of Momomi seemed to have been done over with an icepick.

-"Oh, shit,"- Kaname whispered with a tiny voice. -"I'm in trouble..."-

Next time, we head back to Quahog for more of Peter's shenanigans, now with a new partner in crime called Yaya. :)