Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi, nor do I own Adam, Eli, Clare, or any of the other canon characters featured in this story. I do own Chase, however.

A/N: Oh my readers, how I love you ;)

Thank you all so much for the positive feedback. I'm falling more in love with writing this story by the day! I have some interesting plans for Chase and Eli.

(I actually came up with a couple name...Elase.)

Well, loves, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Chapter 4

I wiped the fresh tears from my eyes, hugging the pillow next to me. A sigh escaped my lips; partially of contempt, a hint of pain. Eli slid his arms around my waist, kissing my cheek tenderly. "Are you alright?" he whispered, stroking my hair. I nodded, smiling softly to myself. He muttered something inaudible, tracing circles on my hipbones with his index fingers. This was incredibly perfect, just us lying here like this.

I had just given my virginity to Elijah Goldsworthy.

Eli spun me around, our eyes meeting once more. He cupped my cheek, slowly running his thumb back and forth. "You're beautiful." he said softly; a small blush crept across my cheeks, and I averted my eyes from his gaze. He pulled me close to him, our bodies pressed together in a sweet embrace. His head fell to the crook of my neck, his lips placing soft kisses along my collarbone. I closed my eyes, taking what had just happened in. A 'hn' escaped my lips, my own undefined comment partially bringing me back into reality. "Eli...what time is it?" I asked quietly. He brought his face to mine, looking past me to the digital clock on his nightstand. "Around eleven-thirty. My parent said they'd be home around 12. We still have half an hour left, you know." he smirked, wiggling his eyebrows.

I rolled my eyes playfully, wrapping his sheet around me as I stood up. "I should probably get dressed, maybe get some sleep." I muttered, running a hand through my hair. "So I don't get a companion tonight?" he said sarcastically, leaning on his hand. "We'll see." I replied, turning the knob of his door. He smiled at me genuinely before I walked out, my heart skipping a beat. I took in a deep breath, walking into my bedroom.

The sheet fell from my body, and I quickly slipped on a T-shirt as I looked for something to wear. I found a pair of shorts, grabbing some underwear before heading outside to the bathroom. The front door downstairs closed, followed by excited conversation; Cece and Bullfrog were back. I blushed, running into the bathroom and locking the door. I turned on the shower, letting the room fill with steam; it was somewhat comforting, the sound of the water along with the smoky atmosphere. The warm water flowed over my body, rinsing me of the layer of sweat that had formed over the last hour.

Another door shut, I presumed to Eli's parent's room, and I sighed, rinsing the soap from my body and hair. I turned the water off, stepping out of the shower, and slipped on my clothes. There was a small, somewhat timid knock at the door; I raised an eyebrow before opening it, the small clouds of steam escaping into the somewhat cool hallway. Eli stood in front of me, smiling faintly as he glanced at me. "Um, are you coming to bed?" he asked sheepishly, switching his gaze between me and the floor.

The sarcastic attitude he'd played beforehand was gone; he was slightly nervous, and wanted me to sleep with him. Not anything like before, but actual sleep, just us lying in silence holding each other. I smiled, kissing his cheek softly. "I'll be there in a second." He nodded, looking back at me before disappearing into his room.

...

The ride to school was silent, a slightly guilty haze hanging over the both of us. Eli parked in the back of the parking lot, as far away from the school as possible. I got out of the car, while Eli remained in his place, his gaze focused on the street ahead of him. I pressed my lips to a line, walking back to the car. "Eli, are you coming?" I questioned softly, becoming slightly worried. He shrugged his shoulders, scoffing lightly. "I don't know what to do." he admitted, looking at me. I pushed my hair behind my ear, "You don't have to tell her. We could just go back to the way things were before all of this." I said calmly.

I wasn't exactly calm; I was scared out of my mind. The same questions that probably plagued Eli at the moment were running through my mind. Of course, it'd be a thousand times worse for me than it would for him, seeing as Clare would think all of it was my fault. It was both of our decisions, but no one ever believes the girl. Eli shook his head, finally getting out of Morty. "I don't want to." he said smoothly, wrapping his arms around my waist. A blush cascaded across my cheeks, "R-really?" He nodded, a smirk playing on his lips. I smiled in contempt, but it was half-hearted. "Then what do we do?"

He stared blankly, taking in a deep breath. "We'll keep it a secret. No one has to know." he suggested. My eyes widened slightly at his proposal; I'd be the infamous other woman. Something in the back of my mind told me that I was the second-best, but somewhere, I knew it'd be worth it. Eli was everything to me, and after last night, I couldn't go back to the way things were before. He told me he loved me, and I loved him.

I nodded slowly, kissing him chastely before drifting away from his grip. "Okay. I'll do it." I whispered, pulling my bag higher on my shoulder. Eli smiled, hugging me again before taking off to find Clare. I sighed, waiting a few minutes before following in his wake. There was a strange sensation running through my body; a mix of nervousness and excitement. I blinked slowly, hiding away the feelings I had during my last conversation, and began looking around the massive crowd for Adam.

Classes that day were short-lived, nothing of incredible interest arose until my lunch period. I sat with Adam to my left, Eli to my right, and Clare across from me. Eli's arm was wrapped protectively around Clare's waist, holding her dangerously close to him. A wave of jealousy crossed over me; I understood what we were doing was complicated, but he told me he was in love with me, and I felt it should be me in Eli's embrace. Clare shifted in her seat, but it was limited due to Eli's grip. We sat in silence; there wasn't much to talk about, seeing as what was most interesting was off the table for discussion. Adam cleared his throat, "Um, Fiona and I are going out after school." I smiled, "That sounds great, Adam." He blushed, looking down at his lap. "She's the first girl I've liked at Degrassi." he said sheepishly, looking to Eli and Clare.

Clare smiled warmly, "Awe, Adam, that sounds sweet." Eli nodded in approval, kissing Clare's forehead softly. She looked up at him, flashing him a small smile. "So, Eli," I started, smiling sarcastically, "your mom told me about this concert tonight. She happened to mention something about extra tickets, but you're probably busy tonight." His eyes widened slightly, but ended up in a semi-cold stare. A small sense of dread spread throughout my body, his gaze worrying me. I stood up abruptly, walking away from the table down the hallway.

My locker came into view, and I collapsed against the metal door full-force. I cringed at the impact, but took it as a small punishment; I'd gotten myself into all of this, and it was my own fault that Eli was treating me like an emotional ping-pong ball. I stood up, opening my locker to look through my backpack. The blade of the razor brushed against my hand, and I sighed, picking it up and slipping it into my pocket. I looked around, making sure no one saw me; if I was caught with a razor, I'd probably get expelled or something. I made my way into the bathroom, locking myself into a stall. I lifted up my sleeve, exposing my partially scabbed and somewhat scarred wrists.

The blade dug into my skin; I flinched, holding back tears as the blood fell in rose-colored drops on the floor. I removed the razor, slipping it into my pocket as I blotted the cut with toilet paper. I rolled my sleeve down again, making an unspoken promise to cover it with a bandage when I got back from school. I made my way back into the hallway, avoiding the lunchroom. I couldn't go back in there; I couldn't face Eli after what I did in the bathroom. He could read me like an open book.

It wasn't worth the risk.

A/N: Well, well, well...another secret of Chase revealed ;) I hope you enjoyed this chapter. You guys make my days.

Review, my gorgeous readers!

Muchlove.