Not Mine, Never Mine Usual Disclaimers.

This story is set during 'Puppy Instincts', mentioned in passing during the Epilogue.

It wasn't awkward, no really it wasn't, lying on his back, naked on the couch, propped up on his elbows with Spock doing the full Monty in front of him. It could have been sexy, had Spock been facing him, instead of the door, with his back to him. Getting caught naked, that was awkward; being caught having sex with Spock, that was embarrassing; getting caught by the cops, naked and having sex with Spock, that was mortifying. Having the cops break in because the neighbours had reported a robbery happening at "that nice Vulcan's place" after hearing the thumps, bumps, and bangs of the captain and first officer attempting to undress and find the couch all in the dark, while making out, was beyond description in words. Jim bet that his sneaky Vulcan could, he was a bastard like that; Illogical, that would be the word Spock would use. Jim snapped himself back to reality, deciding to keep his mouth shut and let Spock handle the decidedly dicey situation. When the door had opened, Spock had paused, stopped sucking on Jim's collarbone, before looking up and behind him before climbing off of Jim to face the three men standing in the doorway. The only illumination was that which filtered through the door, Jim on full display, both he and Spock fully illuminated against the dark background. Jim shifted uncomfortably, causing Spock to move slightly to better shield Jim from view, although it did nothing for Spock's modesty.

'Can I help you gentlemen?' Spock asked coolly as if this sort of thing happened all the time.

Spock's building manager was looking suitably horrified; he was undoubtedly the one who had unlocked the door for the two officers. The slightly shorter officer was shaking with silent laughter, while the taller looked as if he had never seen such a delightful sight on the job before.

The taller officer was able to keep his voice at a steady neutral tone as he answered, 'your neighbours reported a robbery at this address, it appears they were mistaken.'

'Why'd you break in if it was a robbery, wouldn't you assume that the door was already unlocked?' Jim asked, forgoing his resolution to let Spock handle it.

Spock turned and raised one eyebrow that Jim interpreted as: you are not helping the situation, please kindly shut up.

The officer decided to ignore Jim's question, 'since the two of you are clearly in no danger of being robbed, we should be on our way.'

'That assumes that virtue can't be stolen,' Jim said grinning.

Jim heard the shorter officer laugh, while Spock gave him a Vulcan not-glare that only made Jim's grin widen. Spock waited until the three men were halfway down the corridor before shutting the door on the enquiring neighbours who had witnessed the entire exchange.

'That was not appropriate Jim.'

Jim whined and spread his legs wider, 'please?'

Spock rejoined him on the couch, tending to Jim's every whim until Jim was hard, aching, and begging for more.

Spock pulled away abruptly, 'since you clearly can get satisfaction from teasing others, you don't need me.'

'Spock,' Jim choked out as the half-Vulcan walked away.

Jim scrambled up and stumbled in the dark following Spock into the bedroom where his first officer was preparing for bed. Jim scowled, hands on his hips, at Spock who pointedly ignored him as he climbed in under the covers.

'You may sleep at my feet if you wish,' Spock said.

Jim scowled harder and climbed into bed next to Spock, curling up against Spock, hoping that he might still get lucky.

'If you insist on misbehaving James,' Spock said pushing Jim away slightly, 'I will make you sleep on the floor.'

Jim whined and buried his face into Spock's chest, relaxing when he felt Spock wrap his arms around him and pull him in closer.

When Jim told Bones the story the next day at lunch, Bones had burst into laughter, while trying not to feel too horrified at the amount of detail Jim had included.

'It's not funny,' Jim commented with his mouth full, 'he left me to suffer blue balls all night and this morning.'

Bones only laughed harder, 'oh Jimmy, can't you see, he was training you.'

'I'm not a dog.'

'Yes, but you should know by now that Spock can be possessive, just look at how he reacted when you suggested sharing that one time? My guess is that he wanted to teach you a lesson.'

'What lesson, don't make cops laugh?'

'Jim,' said Bones turning serious, 'how do you feel about the cops looking at Spock while he was naked?'

'I dunno, I guess in hindsight I feel a little off about him being ok with it, but they were looking at me, not him, besides, I know that Spock isn't going to do anything anyway.'

'And how did you feel about them looking at you?'

Jim shrugged, 'a little uncomfortable, but not enough to really care.'

'Ok, now how do you think you would feel if they were looking at Spock and Spock had a reputation for sleeping around?'

'But Spock doesn't-'

'Just answer the question Jim.'

'Fine. I wouldn't like, and Spock does like me I would wonder if I was enough... oh.'

'If it makes you feel better, I would stare at you too, at least I've seen what's down there. Jim what are you doing?'

Jim had ducked under the table and was currently trying to peer in between Bones' legs, 'you see that guy over there? He's Spock's neighbour, the one who called the cops.'

Bones grinned, he had a feeling that he wasn't going to let Jim forget about this for a long time.