"Oh God."

Chloe slammed the front door, kicking off her shoes and falling onto the sofa. She tried to control her breathing but she couldn't. Holy shit. Holy shit.

"Wha- Chloe?" Aubrey mumbled, where she was lying on the other sofa.

"Oh my gosh."

"Explain or-" yawn - "Go 'way."

Chloe tried to stay calm, as she poured a big glass of wine, which was probably a bad idea, but she didn't know what to do. The realisation of what she had just done was hitting and it was hitting hard. Aubrey had obviously fallen asleep while marking papers because she was surrounded by essays and still fully dressed. Oh crap, Chloe thought repeatedly. Oh fucking crap.

"Aubrey...I just slept with my student," Chloe confessed feverishly.

"Who Beca?"

"No..."

"What?!"

Aubrey sat up where she had been slouched on the sofa, knocking over a pile of law papers and an empty wine glass.

"Shit..." she tried to pick up the papers but then shook her head violently. "No, okay, Chloe, so you realise you never had to prove anything to me...? Or to anyone?"

"I guess I really messed up..." Chloe admitted.

She ran a hand through her red hair. Her head was really pounding; it was about three in the morning and Chloe couldn't even begin to process the fact that she to work the next day.

"Yeah, I guess you did. Spill Jill."

"Okay...so this guy in my class, Nick. He's twenty four. He invited me to a party tonight at his apartment, he was being really nice, but I should never have gone, but I did and I was really drunk and it just happened. Oh gosh, I'm such an idiot..."

Chloe took a big sip of wine, trying to numb herself but failing.

"I'm gonna get fired, Aubrey," she said quietly.

"Look, just tell him not to tell anyone and don't let it get any further. Don't worry."

"I will. Gosh, I'm sorry."

Aubrey sighed and came over to sit next to Chloe.

"For what?"

Chloe shrugged. She could feel herself choking up.

"Look, Chlo' it'll be okay," Aubrey's tone was a lot gentler now. "You went through a lot with Tom, okay, this is totally understandable. Don't beat yourself up about it."

Aubrey realised that Chloe's eyes were full of tears.

"C'mere."

She wrapped an arm around Chloe's shoulders and Chloe rested her head on Aubrey's, trying to keep tears from escaping, but they'd already trickled down her cheek. A wave of fatigue suddenly hit her and Chloe realised just how tired she was.

"I'm gonna go to bed," Chloe said, wiping her eyes and getting up.

"Okay, me too. Promise me you won't worry about it Chloe?"

"Yeah," Chloe agreed meekly, feeling grateful for her friend.

Chloe fell through the door and onto her bed. She fell asleep almost instantaneously.

Beca sat down in English the next day. She was actually on time for once, but Chloe wasn't even there yet. Beca had been totally buzzing about seeing Chloe today, all of last night. She was kind of worried. But she really wanted to try and make it up to her. Maybe successfully this time.

"Hi everyone, sorry I'm late...so, let's get started."

Beca's stomach jumped when she heard Chloe's soft voice. She looked as gorgeous as usual, in her work clothes of a blue cardigan and light pink shirt and a skirt. But Beca also noticed that she seemed a little...vacant.

Chloe's eyes flicked to Beca's, then averted immediately. Beca felt a rush of butterflies.

"So, chapter five, this is where..."

Beca drifted off at this point. She noticed Chloe seemed really tired, and she kept getting kinda flustered. Beca hoped she wasn't too upset about everything. She wanted to make it up to her. She wanted Chloe to be her friend for crying out loud.

"Hi," Beca breathed, smiling.

Beca had hung about at her desk after the class ended, waiting for Chloe to stop hissing at an older student called Nick, but when they were done, Beca took her chance and headed over to where Chloe was stood at the front of the lecture hall.

"What could you possibly want?" she asked even more poisonously than usual. Beca was a little taken aback, but then she got her shit together.

"I really really did not mean to miss you yesterday," Beca explained, trying hard to express just how bad she felt. "I got arrested, it was really awful and I'm really sorry. I was in a jail cell all night."

"I don't care. You're never gonna change my opinion on you because you've already proven to me that you're a jerk and I want you nowhere near me."

Chloe looked at her for the briefest of seconds then crossed her arms tight.

"Okay, you're right," Beca agreed, kind of sadly.

Beca didn't say anything for a moment, then she just smiled incredulously.

"Yeah, I am a jerk," Beca admitted, shrugging. "I treat people like shit, usually. I shut people out. I punched a guy two days ago. But, there's something about you that makes me wanna be a better person, I'm not gonna pretend like there's not! I'm sorry. But you have to trust me."

"No. Cos there's something about you that makes me wanna punch you."

Okay, so this was much more hateful than usual, Beca thought. Maybe...maybe she had really messed it up. Maybe there was no way back.

"Are you okay Chloe? Seriously?" Beca eyes were filled with worry.

"No I'm not okay. Just go away, I can't deal with you right now."

Beca just looked at her. She realised that Chloe really did hate her.

"Fine."

And Beca slammed the door as she left.

So she was so stupid. Everything she said to Jesse...she was being a total hypocrite. Just because she liked Chloe and because she was nice to her it did not mean Chloe owed her anything. It certainly didn't mean that Chloe liked her back. In fact she'd been one hundred percent clear that she didn't like Beca. So Beca, as usual, was still being a total jerk. Beca realised that Chloe was not in her life for a reason. Fuck it. And fuck her.

"I'm an idiot," Beca said, flopping back on the grass next to where Jesse was watching Rocky on the quad.

"Why?"

"She does hate me."

"Who?"

"Chloe."

Jesse shut his laptop to look at her confusedly.

"Why?"

Beca sighed and shrugged, throwing her hands up exasperatedly.

"I'm a jerk! I couldn't just accept that she's not into me, and she's not. She doesn't even like me as a person. She made that clear but I was too selfish to listen. I'm a shit person. I give up on being nice cos it doesn't work. She doesn't want me."

Beca noticed that her fingernails were digging into her arms really hard, and she stopped before she drew blood. She sighed deeply again and stared up at the sky, wishing she was a different person.

"No Beca, you're wrong," Jesse said and Beca sat up to listen. "It's okay to like people. It's okay to want people and it's okay to go after what you want, alright? Otherwise, how will you ever get what you want? And yeah sure, sometimes you do have to stop going after people if they're really not into you, but you're not an idiot. She's an idiot. Because you're amazing. And you have nothing to feel bad about."

He was looking at her seriously, his brown eyes intense. Beca felt a rush of affection towards him suddenly; he was really a good person at heart.

"Thanks Jesse."

"Any time."

"I've gotta work at the radio station," Beca said.

"Kay. Good luck."

"So did you talk to Nick?" Aubrey asked.

They were in the same coffee shop again, Chloe was sat with an espresso.

"Yeah."

"And?"

"He said not to worry about it. It was just a one time thing, he's not gonna say anything."

"You see! It's fine."

"Yeah."

Chloe drank her coffee fast. She should've felt better now that she knew she wouldn't be fired for sleeping with Nick. But she didn't feel better. She really didn't feel better.

"I also talked to Beca," Chloe said quietly.

"Oh?" Aubrey said, attentively sitting up straighter in her seat.

"I think I really upset her..." Chloe admitted.

"Why?"

"She apologised and everything. And I was really horrible. I told her to go away. Aubrey, I don't like being mean. I tried being a slut and it didn't work. Now...I'm hurting someone that doesn't deserve it. It's all backfiring."

"It's cos you're a good person Chloe. You never had to prove anything. You never had to try and be someone that you're not."

"Hmm," Chloe agreed softly.

There was a moment of silence where Chloe just stared into her coffee cup and Aubrey looked at Chloe, like she was trying to figure her out.

"You like Beca?" Aubrey asked.

"No."

Aubrey raised her eyebrows.

"I mean yeah. She's cute. And she's actually really caring. And smart."

"So go for it, she clearly likes you."

"I barely know her though," Chloe said honestly. "And she's my student."

"You're both adults, I'm sure you can work it out."

Chloe sighed.

"Well, it's too late anyway. I messed it up."

Aubrey looked at her redhaired friend sadly.

"I'm never being a bitch again," Chloe said quietly.

"Maybe that's a good idea."

Author's note: hey thankyou for reading please review if you liked it or didn't like it or if you have any ideas idek anyway thankyou for reading :) xxx