Chapter 4

Bustman: Hello, and thank you for your wonderful reviews! We are now in double digits!

(Confetti falls down from a party ball; Yoshi, who had lifted up the party ball from a balcony above Bustman, loses his balance and falls over the balcony next to him.)

Bustman: Hiya, Yoshi. While you're here and in great pain I imagine, why don't you do the disclaimer?

Yoshi: (Spits out two teeth and his ribs.)

Bustman: Stop messing around, Yoshi, we have business to take care of.

Yoshi: (Groggily, after swallowing back down his ribs) Bustman does not own anything except the fic itself.

Bustman: Thank you, Yoshi.

Yoshi: Are you giving us health insurance?

Bustman: (Bursts out laughing and wipes a tear away from his eye) Ah, Yoshi, m'boy, I hurt you smashers so often to keep the readers entertained that I'd have to be the Queen of England to give you health insurance. However, you do have a dental plan. Make good use of it. Anyways, enjoy the story.

Master Hand read Star magazine uneasily, not able to concentrate. He finally slapped it shut in frustration.

"Ooh, it's their thousandth edition. Ought to have pretty good dirt in there." Crazy whistled, looking at the cover. He turned to a flight attendant that was passing. "Excuse me, my crab-apple juice has a hair in it."

"I'm sorry, sir. May I get you another?" she said tiredly.

"No, I've lost my appetite for it now. Get me some rotten tomato juice."

The flight attendant raised her eyebrows. "Sir, ordering crab-apple juice is one thing, but I don't believe we have rotten tomato juice."

"I thought this was supposed to be first class! I'm never flying this airline again!"

The flight attendant sighed. "I'll see what I can do, sir."

"Ask the pilot if I can ride in the cockpit!" Crazy called after her. He turned to Master Hand. "You reading that?" he asked, pointing to the thousandth edition special.

"No," Master Hand said as Crazy greedily grabbed it. "But Crazy, do you think it was a bad idea to leave the smashers in the back of the plane while we ride first class?"

"What? Um, no…" Crazy said, absorbed in the magazine. Master Hand sighed and stared out the window.

I have a bad feeling about this…

Captain Falcon was reading Star magazine in the back. "Hey K.K., want to read some? It's the one thousandth edition."

K.K. plucked a string on his guitar. "Nah, I'm not into those types of magazines that intrude on star's lives. They're people just like us." Captain Falcon stared at him. K.K. sighed. "People, dog, whatever."

Captain Falcon stared back down at the magazine. "Man, I'd like to go out with so many of these stars. If only I could meet them…"

Leon Powalski snorted from across the aisle. "Like they'd go out with you if you'd ask."

"Hey, dawg, I'm a woman magnet." He secretly pushed the 'Help' button on his arm hold. A young, female flight attendant ran over to him.

"See?" Captain Falcon said, smirking.

"What's the problem, sir?" The flight attendant asked anxiously.

"The problem is, madam, that I'm irresistibly attracted to you." Captain Falcon said, putting one of his muscular arms on his armrest. The flight attendant rolled her eyes.

"Is there any real problem, sir? Are you thirsty? Are you hot?"

"No, but you are." Captain Falcon said, putting his arm around her. She slapped it.

"Are you flirting with me?"

"Depends. Is it working?"

KAPOW!

"Is that a satisfactory answer?" the flight attendant asked sweetly, having just given Captain Falcon a black eye. "Yes? Great. Call me if you need anything else." She walked away.

"She loves me. I can see it in her eyes." Captain Falcon whispered over to Leon, who rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, I bet she loves you as much as us smashers love your dancing, Falcon."

All of the smashers that had heard Captain Falcon and dancing in the same sentence screamed and pushed the 'Help' button frantically.

"Well," said Bowser, from two rows behind Captain Falcon. "It looks like our bad luck is rubbing off on Captain Falcon."

"Oh, dear, knock on wood." Lyndis muttered across the row from them.

"Attention, passangers." said someone in the cockpit from the intercom. "Some bad turbulance is coming up, so bad that we need two passangers picked at random to sacrifice their lives and get off the plane so it will be light enough to make it through. And it looks as if those two random passengers are… Bowser and Meta Knight! Toodles!"

The floor opened from beneath Meta Knight and Bowser and they fell out of the plane, screaming.

Meanwhile, in the cockpit…

"Er, you know, Crazy, we didn't need to sacrifice two living beings lives to make it through the storm…" The pilot said to Crazy Hand, scratching his head.

"You said I could do any one thing I wanted on the dashboard as long as it didn't involve crashing the plane." Crazy Hand said stubbornly. "And besides, there's no use crying over spilled milk."

Back in the back…

"Ouch, they have a long way to fall." Luigi said, looking out the window into the grand canyon below the plane. "Ah, well. Got any sevens?"

Kirby shook his head. From behind them, Lucario said "Yes, he does. And Ganondorf, I acknowledge your favorite movie is High School Musical."

"Shut up!" said Ganondorf behind them. Luigi rolled his eyes and held his hand out in front of Kirby. Kirby sighed and spit up a seven.

"Hmmm…" Red said, rubbing his chin and staring at Kirby. "Eats anything, very round…must be a Munchlax!"

Kirby's eyes widened, and he ducked just as Red threw a pokeball at him It hit Luigi in the head, and he fell unconscious.

"Hmm. I must need to weaken it first." Red though aloud, grabbing the second pokeball on his belt. "Go, Ivysaur!"

Ivysaur jumped out of his pokeball, right on Pikachu's lap. The air was knocked out of him, and his Star magazine fell out the window.

"Nooooo!" Pikachu cried. "That was the thousandth edition!"

Meanwhile, below the plane…

"Well, Bowser, I'm glad we were able to hang from the plane's wheels." Meta Knight said happily, hanging onto the bar that connected the wheels of the plane.

"Me too." Bowser said. "It seems like our luck isn't that bad after all."

A magazine then hit Bowser in the hand, and he let go in surprise. He grabbed Meta Knight's cape.

"Bowser, let go! Or else I'll fall to my death too!"

"I don't wanna! I'm scared!" said Bowser, weeping.

"Bowser-ahhhhh!" Meta Knight screamed, losing his grip. They both plummeted down.

"And I'd never gotten to read the thousandth edition of Star!" Bowser sobbed as he plummeted through the air.

Meta Knight rolled his eyes. "This is going to be a looooong death."

"Ivysaur, use Bullet Seed!"

Ivysaur used Bullet Seed across the aisle. Kirby ducked again, and the seeds fell out the window. Kirby pressed the 'Help' button. A young flight attendant appeared. "Yes, what can I do to- oh my!" She screamed as Ivysaur's string of seeds hit her. She lost her balance and fell out the window.

"Don't worry, young lady! I'll help you!" Captain Falcon shouted, jumping out the window. K.K. rolled his eyes and grabbed his hand.

"Falcon, are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"No, just trying to get a hot date. Ah, well." Captain Falcon sighed as K.K. hoisted him back in.

Meanwhile, Kirby had swung his hammer across the aisle out towards Ivysaur. He collapsed and did not get up.

"Ivysaur, return!" Red shouted, not at all traumatized that his pokemon had just killed a woman. "I'll use my new pokemon! Go, Yoshimon!"

Yoshi sighed, slammed his book down, and walked over to Red from two aisles behind him. "Yoshi, yosh." He said flatly.

"Yoshimon, use egg attack!"

"Which one?"

"Silly Yoshimon! Pokemon don't talk!" Red said. "Now, use egg attack or you'll go the same way as that flight attendant."

Yoshi quickly got out an egg and threw it at Kirby, who sucked it up and turned into… Yoshi Kirby!

"Yoshi!" Kirby cried, as he extended his long, red tongue. Yoshi quickly sidestepped, and the tongue slapped Pikachu in the face.

Yoshi quickly used his Yoshi Bomb, but Kirby was ready. He extended his hammer and hit Yoshi full in the face. Yoshi skidded away, holding his nose.

"Oh, boy! Is it Beat Up People For No Particular Reason Day?" Samus asked, charging her arm cannon. She blasted out a missle; both Kirby and Yoshi jumped out of the way. The missle hit the floor and exploded, creating a huge hole in the center of the aisle. All smashers nearby had to hold onto their chairs not be sucked into it. Samus did a rapid fire, and all the windows nearby were cracked open.

Meanwhile, back in the cockpit…

Crazy and the pilot felt a violent jerk on the plane, and then the sound of windows cracking. The plane, now unstable, started to lower down.

"Oh, butter biscuits!" The pilot shouted. "The plane's going to crash!" He blushed as Crazy, puzzled, stared at him. "What? We aren't allowed to curse on the plane. Bad example for the little tots who ask to come to the cockpit. Anyways, will you go check what's going on?"

Crazy floated out of the cockpit. When he passed by Master Hand, he whispered, "Some people get so worked up over nothing. He says the plane's about to crash."

"WHAT!!" shouted Master Hand. "Crazy, you do realize we're all about to die?"

"What? Oh," said Crazy Hand, who had just picked back up Star. "I thought he meant crash a party or something. Oh, well, nice knowing you. Toodles!"

Crazy Hand floated through the curtains that separated first class from the rest of the plane. He saw Yoshi and Kirby sparring with each other, Samus shooting missles at Captain Falcon, K.K. playing dramatic music, the hole in the middle of the aisle, the empty seats where Meta Knight and Bowser had once been, the cracked windows, Pikachu frantically asking passengers if they had an edition of Star magazine to spare, and all the smashers hanging on for dear life. He floated back to the cockpit.

"Sir, everything seems fine to me back there," Crazy reported seriously.

"Ugh, very well. We'll have to make an emergency landing." said the pilot. He veered the wheels upwards suddenly. Many of the passengers that were standing up slid to the back of the plane.

"Whee!" Crazy yelled, as he collided with the wall of the cockpit. "Hey, what are you doing?"

"Trying to even out the plane!" The pilot yelled. "But the controls are now hard to, well, control!"

"I've got it!" Crazy Hand said suddenly, snapping his fingers. "We all turn into unicorns and fly away!" The pilot stared at him. He shrugged. "Or we could get half of the passengers to come here, to the front, and get half of them to go to the back. That way the plane will even out."

The pilot grinned. "Crazy, that's genius!" He spoke into the intercom. "Passengers, I have an urgent request. In order to land safely, I need half of you to come here, to the cockpit. The other half needs to go all the way to the back. If you don't, your lives will be gruesomely taken away from you."

"And why should we?!" yelled Ganondorf. Everybody turned to look at him. "Oh, our lives, right."

The smashers, along with the other passengers of the plane, gathered in the first class section. They were trying to even themselves out.

"I'll go to the back, and Kirby can go to the front." Luigi said. "I'm skinny and he's a bit round, but he's so small I doubt he weighs more then me."

"Agreed." said Marth quickly. "King Dedede and King K. Rool, you take opposite sides; you both weigh about the same. Captain Falcon and Ganondorf, Mario and Pit, and me and Link will follow suit. Now let's get moving!"

A cheer erupted from the smashers. Half of them ran front, and half ran back. The pilot was finding it easier to control, but still couldn't get the plane straightened out. "I don't know why…the passengers seemed to be evened out…"

Crazy Hand spoke up. "Maybe the invisible people are favoring one side!" The pilot stared at him. He shrugged. "Or maybe it's the luggage."

"That's it!" the pilot said, snapping his fingers. He spoke into the intercom again. "Passengers, I am sorry to have to request this, but please rid the plane of all your belongings." He could hear shouts of outrage and refusal outside the cockpit. "It's your lives or belongings. You choose."

"And why should we?" cried out Ganondorf. Everybody on his side looked at him. "Oh, right."

"No worries! I have a way to save our lives, the plane, and our luggage too." Snake called out. He brought out his codec. "Otacon, bring in my helicopter. We've got some bags to keep safe."

Fox and Falco whipped out walkie talkies. "Slippy, we need two arwings, fast." They said together, typing in their coordinates.

Samus, Olimar, Wolf and Leon, on the other side, whipped out walkie talkies, calling their own ships. The ships were there within minutes.

"Heave!" shouted Snake, throwing one of the bags down to Otacon, who caught them and threw them into the helicopter. Tons of bags were being thrown down and caught; Pit had called his Paultena's servants, Balloon Fighter had brought in his allies, and Captain Falcon had brought in his ship. The pilot tried again, assisted by Crazy.

"Still can't straighten out!" he shouted. Suddenly it was much easier; Crazy looked out the window; all of Paultena's servants and Balloon Fighter's allies had started to lift the plane. K.K. continued to play dramatic music. The plane, with the help of the servants and allies, was gently lifted in the ocean while the pilot inflated the plane's tube from beneath. And suddenly they were there; in the ocean, safely back on Earth. A rubber slide unrolled from the exits. The smashers, who had been sweating and holding their breath, breathed again. They slid down the slide, taking life jacket's from the seats. A few rafts had emerged from the plane with the tube, and the passengers piled on. Last to emerge were Crazy and the pilot. Everybody erupted in applause. Crazy and the pilot bowed, and high fived each other. The pilot almost lost his balance and fell over. Suddenly they heard a voice. "Make room for Meta Knight!"

"And Bowser!" Bowser chimed in. Bowser was holding onto Meta Knight, and Meta Knight was gliding through the air. He let his cape drop, and they fell onto the raft. "What did we miss?" they asked together. The smashers clapped and greeted the smiling puffball and monster, patting them on the back and laughing. Master Hand went up to pat his brother on the back. He looked at the smashers. They had worked together; they had accepted each other; and they were treating each other like old friends. They were a team again. At least for now.