This chapter isn't so long, but the last one was pretty long so... I'm busy writing the next chapter right now, so it might take a week before I upload it. Let me know what you think.
DEAN
I relaxed into my pillow, feeling Soph's naked body next to mine. Her legs were intertwined with mine, her arm around my torso as her head rested against my arm. I could feel her even breaths against my chest, my lips almost touching her forehead.
"Happy birthday," I heard her murmur and I chuckled. Yeah, this was definitely a happy birthday.
We had our little family moment this morning, Soph and Abby giving me a pretty perfect morning before Soph had to leave Abby at daycare. And then, before Soph could get back, they called from the garage. Told me they had a problem, when all it really was was a cake. But it was nice to know that they liked me as their boss. And then it had been just Soph and me. And it was great. After seven years, you'd expect that special feeling to disappear, but I still felt it when I was around her. And I was even more aware of it when we were alone. And then there was her birthday gift to me... The lingerie. I can't say she didn't warn me, because she did. And my heart sure did skip a few beats when I saw her in that blood red bra and those tiny panties. And then there was the pie Soph made me... It tasted amazing. I was going to finish that pie later tonight, because she didn't give me the chance to do it an hour ago.
"I sure do love birthday sex," I told her, and this time I heard her soft chuckle. I pressed my lips against her forehead, and I heard her sigh. It sounded happy, and I felt myself smiling.
"How is it possible that I still find you so attractive?" I mused, knowing the answer. But at the same time, I didn't. I mean, I had been attractive to her body since I was in my twenties. And now I was thirty-five, and she was still the most attractive woman in the room. Always. I don't get it. And I never will.
"Someone once told me that the guy who would end up with me would be the luckiest man in the universe," she answered and I felt a smile play on her lips.
"I'm good at predicting my own future," I told her, knowing I said that a long, long time ago. Probably fifteen years ago.
We were quiet for a moment before I spoke.
"Too bad I tore those lingerie apart, I would have loved to see you in it again."
I would have expected her to laugh, but I didn't get a response. None at all.
"Soph?" I asked after a moment, but she still didn't answer. "Soph? Sam's gay. He's just hiding it, with the marriage with Linds and everything... And I was born like a woman."
"Hm?" she asked, and I laughed. I knew she probably hadn't been listening to what I said at all, and she had just heard some random words come out of my mouth.
"What's on your mind, Soph?"
"I wasn't going to tell you today..."
"Soph?" I asked as I opened my eyes and looked at her. Her eyes were open, and she got up on her elbow, meeting my eyes for a moment before she said anything.
"I'm late."
"Wow," I breathed. She's late. That means she could be pregnant. I knew she hadn't done a test, because in that case she wouldn't have expressed herself like that. "How long?"
"Almost two weeks. I got a test today. Maybe it's too early to do it, I have no idea. I just know that I'm late, and I'm never late. The last time I was late was when I was pregnant with Abby. What if I'm pregnant? Or what if I'm not? What will happen-"
"First of all, calm down," I said and got up into her level. "You don't have to be nervous about this. If you're pregnant, you're pregnant. And if you're not, then it just didn't work this time."
"It hasn't worked any of the other times, so why would it now?" she asked as she flopped down on her back, her eyes staring up into the ceiling.
"Okay, you: come here," I said and pulled her out of bed. I handed her my t-shirt and I watched her as she pulled it over her head and I pulled on a pair of boxers and my jeans. "Now, where's the test?"
"In my bag," she whispered, and it was easy to see exactly how worried and anxious she was over this.
I found her bag and looked through it until I found the test, and I walked back to Soph with it.
"And now you're going to take the test, okay?"
She nodded slowly as she took the test from me, and I followed her into the bathroom.
"I can't do this if you're going to be in here," she said after a minute and I rolled my eyes.
"You've peed in front of me a thousand times."
"It's a little different this time, isn't it?"
"Fine," I said and walked out of the bathroom, grabbing the underwear on the floor. Man, it was even sexy when it was all torn apart. Did I have to ruin them? I made a promise to myself to find the store she bought these in and buy a new pair. A pair that I wouldn't tear apart. Hopefully.
I heard the bathroom door open then, and I turned in Soph's direction.
"Well?"
"We have to wait for two minutes," she said and walked over to the bed. She sat down on the edge, and I sat down next to her, taking her hand. And then we were pretty much quiet for two minutes.
"I think our two minutes are up," I said after a moment and she nodded. I saw that she was about to stand up and walk into the bathroom again, but she didn't.
"I don't think I can do it," she whispered and I squeezed her hand.
"I'll do it," I promised. "But you're probably going to have to translate."
"We want to see a plus," she said and I nodded to myself as I walked into the bathroom. I saw the test on the counter and I took a deep breath before I picked it up to look at it.
Negative.
Happy birthday to me.
Shit. Seriously? Two years, and still no baby? Was it really that hard? I mean, we payed a lot of money for the inseminations, and they still didn't work? They said it would work. But it was pretty much bullshit. We've gone there for a year, and there was still no baby. Was it really even worth it anymore? To go there, and get our hopes up, and then see a negative test? Okay, so this was the first actual test we did, but still... It was negative. Would it ever be positive?
God, Abby was more than enough. She was more than I ever thought I would have. Soph was more than I thought I would have, so having Abby was a huge plus. She was my baby, and apparently I wouldn't get another one.
I knew I could accept this, but could Soph? She wanted another baby so badly, and this was pretty much our only, and last, chance.
Well, there was only one way to find out.
I didn't have to say a single word to Soph, because she saw how I looked like, and a tear rolled down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away and got up.
"Soph..."
"Just leave it alone, okay? It's pretty obvious that this isn't working, right? Y'know, maybe I'm hitting menopause," she babbled as she walked into the closet.
I snorted to myself and followed her.
"You're not hitting menopause, okay? You're thirty-one years old, and you're not hitting menopause. Maybe you're late for some other reason? It might be stress, or..."
As I talked she had taken the t-shirt off, put some underwear on and now she was pulling on a pair of jeans.
"Is it even worth it? It's obviously not working. Maybe we should just stop? Let's face it – we're not going to have another baby. Not in this lifetime. We didn't have one in our last."
That comment hurt me, so I knew it was killing her to say it. I mean, to see things like that, it's not okay. Sure, I might have been dead when she found out about Abby, but I was very much alive when we made her. So both yes and no to not having a baby in our last life time.
"You're not okay," I said as I walked up to her and cupped her face.
"Right now, no. But I will be."
"Are you sure?"
"Dean, I have Abby. She's my life. And I have you, and you're my everything. So yeah, I'll be fine. Just not in the nearest couple of days."
I wiped away the tears that rolled down her face and I wrapped her close. I felt her arms come around me, and I rested my chin against the top of her head.
"I love you, Soph."
"I love you, too."
"That's all that matters. We have each other, and we always will."
"Soph, we don't have to do this," I said as she ringed the door bell.
"It's your birthday, and your brother invited us home for dinner. We said yes weeks ago. We're doing this."
"But we just-" discussed a lot of things, and decided to stop trying for a baby, I finished in my thoughts. Maybe we shouldn't do this.
"Hey," Sam opened the doors and interrupted my words.
"Hi," Soph answered with a smile and a hug, and Sam let us in.
"So, thirty-five, huh?"
"Shut up," I said as I walked passed him and heard him laugh. "So, what are we eating?"
"No idea," Sammy answered casually and I shook my head. Of course he had no idea. He probably hadn't even tasted it yet. Sometimes, I wondered if he wasn't adopted or something. With that brain, the height, and of course the fact that he has no love for food.
"Are we even related?"
"Funny," he stated and missed the slap in the back of my head as I ducked. I knew it was coming.
"Why do I get the feeling you're hiding something?"
"You haven't even asked me anything," he stated and I shook my head.
"I know. Just a feeling," I told him and glanced at him. I don't know, there was just something about that face. I had known that face for too long not to know that he had something he wanted to say. But what the hell was it?
The dinner was done about an hour later, and I sat down opposite to Sam as Soph sat down opposite to Lindsay.
There was a lot of talking, and just in time for dessert, I saw that face again. Sam was desperate to tell us something. And Lindsay looked almost the same. They glanced at each other, and then looked at us.
"So," Sam started, "we have something to say."
Oh no, bad feeling. I don't know why, but I had a feeling that told me that they could wait a few days to say this. Please, wait a few days.
Soph definitely felt the same way. I felt her hand on my knee, and I placed mine on hers.
Lindsay continued on Sam's words.
"I'm ten weeks pregnant."
Really? Did they have to say this today, of all the other days this year? This month? This week? Did they really have to say this now, when we just did a negative test? I mean, really? I felt like screaming. But of course I didn't. I couldn't loose it in front of Soph.
I saw her plastered smile, and I copied it. Half of it might have been real, because Sammy was having a baby, but the other half was fake. And Sam noticed. Lindsay didn't.
"When did you find out?"
"Last week," Linds answered Soph's question. "We weren't supposed to say anything yet, we decided to wait, but it's hard. I don't get how you managed to wait for so long before you told anyone."
"I had other things on my mind," Soph stated, her voice kind of flat. It was hard to hear it, and I knew Lindsay didn't because she kept on babbling. I didn't listen to a single word though. Instead I grabbed Soph's hand and I held it tight, and I pretended to listen to what was said.
A few minutes later Soph excused herself to go to the bathroom, but it was probably a lie. She just needed to get out of here. I waited until I heard the bathroom door close, and so did Sam.
"You had to tell us today?" I asked at the same time as Sam asked what the hell was going on.
"You can't even be a little happy for us?"
"Not today, no," I told him and got up from my seat. I couldn't sit still.
"What's going on?" Linds asked and Sam seemed to want to know the answer as well.
"Yeah, why can't you..." Sam started and I looked at him. "Oh, crap."
"Yeah, crap," I told him and sat down in my seat again. Crap wasn't the right word, but it would due.
"I'm... Shit, you couldn't have warned me?"
"We agreed on not telling anyone. We figured it would be easier."
"Seriously, what is going on?" Lindsay was still clueless.
"Your test was positive, ours wasn't," I said and saw her horrified expression.
"Shit," she said under her breath and got up from the table and left the room.
"When?" Sammy asked and I turned my gaze to him.
"A few hours ago."
"That sucks."
"Tell me 'bout it. And that's not all; we decided to stop trying. It's not working, so why spend all those money? And to change the subject: Don't get us wrong, it's great that you're having a baby, but today wasn't the best day to let us know."
"You don't have to fake. You didn't even have to come tonight."
"That's what I told Soph, but you know her. She's-"
"Stubborn," Sam finished for me.
"Exactly."
I could be having a fever, and we'd still be here. I heard footsteps then, and I looked up and saw Lindsay.
"I can't get her out of the bathroom."
"Give her five minutes," I commented, knowing she would need it. Hell, she needed more. And she deserved even more.
"Beer?" Sam asked and I nodded. Sammy was about to get up to get it, but Lindsay beat him to the fridge. She handed us the beers, and then I followed Sam into the living room.
"I can't believe you got a cat," I commented on the sleeping striped cat on the couch.
"I didn't," he answered me and I rolled my eyes. Sam sat down next to the cat, and he instantly moved to Sammy's lap. "I can't hate them though."
I laughed at Sam's answer and sat down in the easy chair, seeing how an entire white cat came around one corner.
I was just about to open my mouth and ask Sam a question about the baby when I saw Soph, and I stood up.
"Maybe we should go home," I offered and she shook her head.
"We don't have to."
"But I'm kicking you out," Sam said and I looked at him.
Thank you.
"Okay," Soph gave in with a sigh. "And congratulations."
"Thanks," Sam told her and gave her a hug. We said our good-byes, and then we walked back to the car.
"Could you drive by Tess?"
"Abby's probably asleep," I told her, knowing what she meant.
"Can you do it?"
I nodded and started the car, driving in another direction then home. Five minutes later I pulled over outside Tess' house, and Soph climbed out of the car as I left the engine on. I didn't take long before I saw the door open, and Soph came out with Abby sleeping against her shoulder.
We weren't supposed to pick Abby up until tomorrow, but I could understand Soph's want to have her home tonight. I wanted it too.
Soph managed to open the backdoor, and she gently slid inside and closed the door behind her and Abby.
We didn't say anything as I drove home, afraid to wake Abby up. I parked in the garage right away, and I opened the door for Soph before she had the time to. I took the bag with Abby's stuff and walked a few steps behind Soph on the way inside. She walked directly to the stairs and up to the second floor, but I stayed downstairs for a while. I made sure all the doors were locked, and I checked the devil traps underneath the carpets. It's what I did every night, and especially since Meg was here.
By the time I was done with everything, including putting some things in the dish washer, loading a washing machine, and turning all the lights off, Soph was asleep next to Abby in her bed.
I carefully lifted Soph, trying to wake none of them, and carried her into our bedroom. I turned the lights off on the way, and as I put her down on our bed I also pulled her jeans off. I managed to pull the covers over her, and then I walked into the bathroom to get ready for bed.