A/N: Thanks to JadeDarko , LilShorty0594, halodoll89, HermioneandMarcus, abbynormal420 and AyeDixon for reviewing. Also thank you too all the new readers stefaniewilliams32, wolfie witch, scarletcantley, .Devil, kelizabeth13, halodoll89, softaswinterrain92, kankuroizawesome, AyeDixon, CalaisForever, Pok3monTrain3erBlu3, LunaraWolf, abbynormal420, The Wind Whispers To Me, HermioneandMarcus and Dreamer'Megan ! If I left someone off I'm sorry! This doesn't mean I don't appreciate your support! Welcome to the party my fellow zombie lovers! I am terribly sorry for this very late chapter update. I had drill last weekend for the Army ( I'm starting to wish I stayed on Active Duty instead of switching to the Reserves) and we did weapons qualifications so I had to stay overnight. I qualified Saturday but they didn't check my target sheet right so I had to shoot on Sunday and it just turned into this whole tiring fiasco. Plus I got sunburn on my lips! I'm mixed and I've never had sunburn in my life. I will never make fun of you white people again! lol But it was fun to pretend the silhouettes on the target sheet were zombies and I was taking them down with my M16. It was awesome! So I'm fully qualified! When the zombie apocalypse happens and you live near the San Antonio, Texas area hit me up when the shit hits the fan! :)
JadeDarko: Oh my gosh I'm blushing so hard right now! I'm glad you like it. I have to stay true to Daryl's character or else he'll just seem like a sad parody of himself plus I absolutely HATE when characters are so bad their hardly recognizable. I'm glad you love the flash backs. I wasn't going to stick with it originally but I think it gives more insight into their relationship and also the things Rebecca has gone through. I have no idea where this plot is going so far! This story is practically writing itself. So I may or may not! Stick around long enough and you'll find out. I thought I was the only one paranoid lol and I love that you think this story is kickass. :)
LilShorty0594: Haha thanks. I wasn't really happy with that chapter and I revised it like 8 times but I'm glad you loved it. Oh I love the drama too! What would have been the fun in having them make up immediately? Heck yeah Daryl is pissed. He feels like he wasted a year of his life thinking she didn't love him when he could have been making up with her. Lol I'm glad you readers still love me and I love all of you 3. Without readers all this hard work would be for nothing! I'm excited to see where this goes too.
halodoll89: I'm asuming this means you like the chapter? Lol I hope so since you are following the story. Thanks for the short review anyways. :)
AyeDixon: I'm glad you love it! I'm updating now and I hope your happy with it. It's mostly a filler but still lol. I appreciate the review you are so awesome! Enjoy!
abbynormal420: It's here now! Don't kill me please! lol
HermioneandMarcus: *Blushing* Thanks sweetie! I hope you love this one. :)
*TRIGGER WARNING* THERE IS DRUG USE IN SOME PARTS OF THIS STORY.
Chapter 4 – How High?
-Twenty Four Years Before the Outbreak, North Georgia, Rosewood Trailer Park -
Rebecca ran through the trailer park dodging cars and people as she went, brown hair flying like a cape behind her. She could hardly contain her excitement. Her Aunt April, her father's sister, always called the house once a week concerned about her living situation. She had talked to Becca on the phone minutes ago and told her she could come to live with her. It seemed Aunt April always offered her that chance each phone call yet never followed through. But this time it was different. She promised and to Becca that small promise seemed true. Now she was running to her best friend Daryl's house to share in the good news. Her black converse made a dull thud along the front steps of Daryl's trailer and she yanked open the door, stumbling inside.
"Daryl you'll never guess-."
She paused in the doorway at the sight of Daryl's father, Norman, sprawled out on the couch watching a slightly out of focus show that she instantly recognized as Cops.The oldest Dixon cast her a wary look before letting out an unsettling belch and went back to sipping his beer.
"Whada ya want girl?"
She swallowed nervously fumbling with the hem of her gray shirt in between her nimble fingers. Norman Dixon was much like her own father without a disgusting attraction to young girls. Still she didn't trust him.
"I just want to know where Daryl is sir."
Norman snorted at her proper language before he draining his beer and tossed the can onto the already cluttered coffee table. He stood suddenly scaring Becca half to death and he stumbled to her and grabbed his car keys off a rack by the door. Stopping only to eye her up and down he shoved past her sending her into the door frame painfully.
"Tell those little fuckers not to wait up."He growled out ignoring her question and heading straight to a beat up pick up truck parked out front. She sighed watching him drive away drunk, almost hitting a few residents and she headed into the home. The inside of the Dixon home smelled stale as though no one had cleaned in some time and it was obvious the home missed a womans touch since Daryl's mother had died. Trash littered the living room and dishes piled up in the kitchen sink half hazardly making her skin crawl. Her home wasn't much better since her mother was too sick to do anything more than lay in bed. After her father nearly beat her black and blue when she had let the dishes sit out one night she took on all of the household chores and made sure to keep it clean.
Slowly Becca made her way down the hallway to the bedrooms. She cracked the door to Daryl's room and a wave of disappointment moved through her at the sight of its emptiness Still she lumbered on cracking the door to Merle's room. Merle was sitting on his bed digging through an old shoe box and muttering to himself. Curiosity compelled her and she pushed the door wider only to have it creak loudly alerting him to her presence. Merle jumped off the bed sending the plastic bottles and baggies out of the box and flying all around them.
"Jesus fuckin' Christ you stupid shit! I thought you were someone else!" He frowned collecting the items around the room quickly.
Becca moved to help him as the word 'sorry' slipped through her lips at a whisper. She picked up one of the plastic bottles from the floor eyeing it curiously. She recognized it as one of the many identical bottles her mother needed that littered the night stand of her bedroom. It was a bottle of prescription pills. Before she even had a chance to read what was left of the shredded label, Merle snatched it from her and tossed it into the shoe box.
"Don't touch shit you can't handle lil' girl."
Becca frowned. She hated the way Merle never failed to make her feel like a kid. She scoffed and stepping further into his room she took a seat on his unmade bed.
"Screw you Merle! Just 'cause I'm thirteen doesn't mean I'm a baby!"
"You don't know the first thing 'bout no drugs. You are a damn baby and you don't need 'em."
He sat down next to her and Becca leaned over him examining the box closely. She could identify a baggie of weed almost immediately and another baggie of white powder she could only guess about. The rest of the shoe box consisted of rolling paper, a lighter, a small straw, a square cosmetic mirror and a few prescription bottles with little to no labels.
"Why do you need all that?" Becca asked confused.
Merle shrugged as he dug through the worn out shoe box for a few seconds and he tossed her a bottle which she almost embarrassingly missed.
"'Cause it's an escape."
He watched her closely as she examined the little white pills that moved as she shook the unlabeled prescription bottle.
"If you can tell me what those are you can have 'em. Free of charge."
She unscrewed the cap and let the round pills roll along the palm of her hand. She recognized them instantly as the pain medication her mother took for her terminal cancer. Trying to keep the smug grin off her face she popped the top back on still palming the two pills.
"It's oxycodone."
Merle barked out a loud laugh slapping his knee as though she had made a joke.
"Holy shit kid I thought you were all innocent n' shit. What the hell you know about Oxy? I bet you never even done any drugs."
The truth in Merle's harsh statement hit her hard. She had never considered drugs as her way out of her home situation. She had seen plenty of drug addicts in the neighborhood. Her neighbor's grand-daughter Marie, for example , was a complete meth head. It was obvious by the stringy oily hair that fell short to the middle of her bony back, her sunken in green eyes and of course the needles that lay strewn about the ground just outside of their trailer. Seeing her made Becca sick and had turned her completely off drugs. The most she had ever done was have the occasional beer with Daryl. With a sudden urge to prove herself she glanced back down at the pills before dumping them into her mouth dry swallowing them with ease. Merle laughed as he watched her lean back on the bed.
"I didn't mean for you to take 'em now kid. Sheesh! What did ya want anyway?"
"Just wanted to share in some good news." Becca shrugged staring straight ahead and letting herself relax. She watched through narrowed eyelids as Merle rolled a joint and dug around the box for a lighter.
"Oh yeah and what's that?"
"My Aunt April said I could live with her." The excitement was still buzzing inside of her despite the pills moving through her blood stream that began to slowly relax her body. The bed shook as Merle laughed and the smell of marijuana filled the air.
"That sounds like bullshit. Nobody leaves Rosewood. This place is a fuckin' black hole. How many time's has she promised that crap anyways?"
He passed her the joint and she took a small inexperienced puff. The white smoke-filled her lungs and she coughed as she exhaled feeling the burn deep down in her throat. Merle rolled his eyes and snatched the joint from her taking a puff of his own. How many times had Aunt April made that promise? Three times? Ten times? Fifteen? She had lost count with each phone call always distracted with the happy feeling of knowing someone seemed to care. Becca sighed laying back fully on the bed staring out at the blurry ceiling above her. The combination of the two drugs made her feel so relaxed and free she almost didn't care about her Aunt's empty promise.
"I don't know."She trailed off closing her eyes in an effort to keep the room from spinning.
"Seems like your here to stay sugar tits."
If Becca had been lucid she would have been struck with agony and anger at the realization she would never leaving the trailer park. She would live and die here just like all the rest. Stuck with a dying mother, a father who used and abused her and a future that seemed to lead nowhere but heartache and a below minimum wage income. With the weed and codine coursing through her blood stream thoughts of a bleak future disappeared and she let herself fall into haziness.
She never did get to tell Daryl about her good news.
- North Georgia Countryside, Present Day -
Adjusting to a new life was hard. Becca had no problem with the forest given that half her childhood was spent running around the trees and learning how to hunt. But what made it hard was that she had to interact with the other survivors. Most of them stayed away from her put off by her lack of people skills and connection to the redneck brothers so she stuck to both Merle, Jacqui and Amy like glue. Surprisingly Merle didn't seem to mind her company only stating once that she better not annoy him. Actually his correct wording was 'Better not get in my goddamn way blondie'. Still she didn't take offence. That's just how Merle was. The youngest Dixon on the other hand avoided Becca like she was a leper. Daryl didn't seem to be quite as willing to let go of the past as she was and did everything in his power to distance himself. All the death Becca had seen in her escape from Atlanta and the life she made on the run had changed her entire outlook. Death surrounded her in the stumbling bodies of the dead she fought and lingered in the tired eyes of the survivors. There was no escape. So Becca tried to surround herself with things that distracted from it all. She washed clothes in the river and cooked with the other women. She went on solo hunting trips, when Shane allowed, gathering extra meat. Still something was missing. The need to make up with Daryl overwhelmed her senses and was beginning to drive her crazy.
"Still thinking about him?"
Amy grinned sitting across from Becca's tired form as she fixed the lines of her fishing pole. If there was one thing Becca was glad of it was Amy. Amy seemed to be the only survivor, besides Jacqui, that held actual conversations with her. It had surprised her in the beginning but slowly she was getting used to the teenager's presence.
"Only a little." She lied poking at the makeshift fire pit with a long stick.
Amy let out a very unladylike snort as she set the pole down and dug through a grey tackle box for more wire. Although Becca hadn't told her the complete story behind the tension between herself and Daryl, Amy was a smart kid and came to her own conclusion which was surprisingly accurate in most aspects.
"You are such a freakin' liar! I've read enough Nicholas Spark's to know heart-break when I see it. "
"The Notebook isn't a manual on all relationships." Becca grinned and both girls fell into a laughing fit until Amy's sister Andrea made her way towards them. Unlike Amy, Andrea was hostile and incredibly mouthy. She never failed to voice her opinion with loudness like another survivor Lori. The only thing that separated her from Lori besides physical features was the fact that Andrea had a deceitfulness in her. Becca couldn't tell how shady she seemed but it was enough to keep her on her toes around the blonde.
"You ready Amy? " Armed with her own fishing pole she propped it over her squared shoulders in a threatening manner, obviously hating the budding friendship between Amy and Becca. Amy nodded rolling up the wire oblivious to the glare Becca was receiving.
"Getting settled ok?" Andrea asked as she pierced Becca's figure with judgment in her blue eyes.
Rebecca shrugged tossing the stick into the fire and dusted her hands ignoring the real meaning of Andrea's tone. She knew Andrea didn't like her especially after discovering her ties to the Dixon brothers and she never failed to let her know it.
"Just fine." She shot back letting a smug grin cross her face. She wasn't going anywhere. Not if she could help it.
Andrea nodded and pulled on her sister's arm egar to get away from Becca's company. With a small wave and a smile Amy followed after her sister towards the quarry hoping to finally reel in some fish. Despite having decent fishing skills both sisters weren't having much luck catching anything besides the random piece of trash.
Boredom filled Becca as she stared out into the camp watching the others go about their business. The feeling of eyes boring into her skull hit her and she looked around only to spot Shane staring her down as though he was trying to kill her with a Jedi mind trick. It made her hair stand on end and she looked away only to see Daryl stride past her, a string of squirrels dangled from his belt as he walked. It looked as though he was still ignoring her and she was tired of it. She watched as he dumped his kill by a log and walked into his tent.
Becca was tired of being ignored. She could handle it in the past when others did it but having Daryl be mad at her hurt worse than everything her father had done to her. It shook her to her very core. So deep in thought she hadn't noticed she had gotten up and walked across camp to Daryl's tent. Becca rolled her shoulders and neck taking a deep breath to prepare herself for the argument that would no doubt come. She tossing the tent flap aside she stormed inside ready to give him a piece of her mind when she froze. Daryl stood with his back to her and had taken his shirt off. The muscles of his back and arm's rippled with each movement and she could swear she was drooling.
"Close yer mouth or ya gonna catch flies."
She was caught off guard hearing his voice and she could have cried. Instead she reluctantly pulled her eyes away from his very attractive body and folded her arms to stop herself from fondling him.
"This whole ignoring me thing has to stop."
"So you just want me to pretend nothing happened?"
He was stonewalling her by answering her question with another question, something he had discovered years ago that pissed her off, and Daryl dug through his bag for a clean shirt. She frowned crossing the small space of the tent until she was an arm's length away.
"Daryl it wasn't my fault! If you want to get mad and throw a bitch fit do it for your brother! He's the real reason this whole goddamn mess wasn't resolved!"
Daryl's movements froze and he turned to her green eyes hard and accusing as his hand twitched, aching to grab her up into his arms and run his hands along that familiar flesh but his stubborn nature wouldn't allow him to budge. He had been hurt to many times to let it go and as much as he hated to admit to himself he was afraid.
Afraid to take down the walls he worked so hard to build and let her back in.
Afraid to love her all over again and deal with the difficulty of building a stable relationship especially during the end of the world.
Afraid that once he loved her and gave her his heart again she would die at the hands of the dead.
Daryl's trademark Dixon strength and hard facade could only be kept up for so long before he was whittled down to nothing. He frowned, gesturing towards his open tent flap.
"You should leave."
No apology no regretfully words nothing. Becca flinched at his harshness staring him in the eyes as she made her way out and flashed him a sad smile.
"Just because you won't let me in doesn't mean I won't try. I love you Daryl and I don't care how hard you try to push me away. You forget that I know you better than you know yourself and I'm not giving up on you, on us."
Then she was gone leaving her desperate words and Daryl's mixed emotions to linger in his head.
Rebecca felt desperate. She had hoped- no wanted Daryl to chase after her in some surprising act of romance but he hadn't. In fact he hadn't spoken to her let alone come out of his tent all day and she was beginning to feel the pressure of 'what if'. What if Daryl decided that he hated her? What if he stopped loving her?
It was beginning to drive Becca crazy and she needed something, anything to take the edge off. It wasn't often she felt the need to do drugs but she figured one hit or anything couldn't hurt. That's how she found herself standing outside Merle's tent bouncing on the balls of her feet as she waited for him to notice her. Usually she would have barged right in without a word but now she wasn't to eager to get into another fight, especially with another Dixon.
"Stop standin' there like a goddamn stalker and bring ya skinny ass in here!"
She bit the inside of her cheek to keep from grinning and stepped inside his messy tent stepping over Merle's sprawled out form a porno magazine in his hand. Becca cringed taking in the crude cover.
Asian Busty Beauties.
Ugh.
"The fuck you want?"
"I need a favor. I know your holding."
Now it was Merle's turn to grin and he laughed wiggling his eyebrows in a suggestive manner.
"Well what do I get then?"
Becca frowned and kicked his leg in growing annoyance.
"How about you get the heel of my boot crushing your balls."
"Goddamn,"Merle cringed sitting up and grabbing his backpack, "try it bitch and I'll skin ya ass instead a the squirrels!"
Merle ripped open his backpack revealing multiple plastic baggies full of everything ranging from pills to heroin. He tossed her a baggie only half full of weed only for her to toss it back at him.
"I'm gonna need something stronger."
With a short laugh Merle grinned and dug down deep tossing her a baggie of white powder.
"That's the best coke money can buy so don't fuckin' take it all."
Becca rolled her eyes before placing a small amount of powder on the tip of her index finger and sniffed it through one nostril. A rushed feeling of euphoria ran through her and she shivered. It had been a while since she had done coke this good and she took a little more, making sure to rub it on her gums. Merle snatched it back taking some for himself and zipping the bag back up.
"Scoot over dick." Becca nudged Merle off his messy sleeping bag. He moved willingly but not before mumbling under his breath in irritation and she flopped onto her back. They lapsed into a comfortable silence until Becca began to fidget.
"If you're lookin' for girlie pillow talk you ain't getting it here." Merle sighed.
"I'm just pissed off about Daryl and how you fucked him over. Now he won't even speak to me."
Merle frowned running a tired hand over his face and reached inside another duffel bag tossing a small stuffed bear at her face before laying back down, arm over his eyes.
"Go take that to that pussy n' he'll tell ya what ya wanna know. Now get the fuck out you're killin' my high."
And with that he rolled over as she stepped out examining the tiny brown bear wearing a leather vest, embroidered with a set of angelic wings, and fake cigarette dangling from its mouth. Becca smirked kissing the bear's soft fur against her chapped lips. Only Daryl could find a stuffed animal as bad ass as himself. She hugged the bear to her chest and stumbled to Daryl's pausing only to flip off Shane who was cleaning his gun outside the RV, the cocaine in her system giving her a boost of bravery.
She walked into Daryl's tent spotting him cleaning off his arrows in the corner, a pouty look on his face.
"Didn't I tell you to git?" He frowned not bothering to look up. He was still angry at their earlier conversation and couldn't even begin to sort through the mess in his head so he distracted himself with skinning squirrels and cleaning his arrows, which was pretty stupid once he thought about it, but anything to get his mind off Rebecca was worth doing and it worked. Until she walked into his tent.
"What's this?"
Daryl looked up only to spot the one thing he didn't want to see besides his estranged wife. That damn stuffed bear he couldn't bear to get rid of no matter how much he wanted to. She was never meant to see it. Daryl tossed his arrows aside and stood. He had a lot of explaining to do.
A/N: I don't know how many times I can apologize before the word sorry loses it's meaning but if it matters any I'm sorry for posting this so freakin' late but my life really sucks right now. I don't want to get into it. All I'll say is if any of you are religious just pray for me to make it through this difficult time. I'll try to update soon and I'm already writing chapter five so that should make y'all happy. I'm annoyed with this chapter because it's so short but I promise the next one will be so long your minds will be freakin' blown! The next chapter is where Rick is introduced so don't get too disappointed. Don't lose faith in me please! Please review! They make me happy! :)