Thank you to all who have posted reviews and comments - you're my life blood and I so appreciate your efforts. My beta remains in the completely awesome category - thank you, Mr. Bigg, for your incredible patience and editing.
A/N: All characters are the property of Stephenie Meyer. No disrespect or copyright infringement is intended.
Well
Bella's little hand was light and warm in mine as we climbed the stairs leading to Carlisle's study. The house was abuzz with my family's thoughts, all recognizing our arrival long before we parked the car. Esme worked the blueprint stretched out on her desk, her thoughts warm and sweet as caramel; Carlisle was in his study, contemplating some of the histories displayed in the artwork surrounding him. Rosalie and Emmett thoughts were on polar opposites of the scale, with Emmett's excitement to greet us, and Rosalie's complete lack thereof.
Jasper's thoughts were the biggest surprise. His mind was blank, all his focus on serenity and calm. It was curious, until Alice's thoughts intruded over his. I know they're here, she thought calmly as she continued servicing the placid Jasper. I turned my mind away, finally understanding Jasper's focused effort to keep Alice busy, focusing her ebulliency on him instead of on Bella.
"Is everyone home?" Bella was clearly nervous. She didn't like the spotlight, and coming here so soon after Canada definitely brought her center stage.
"Yes. I'm surprised they haven't all filed down to greet us, but they're aware we're here." Her palm was moist. "Don't worry. They're in their rooms."
Her heartbeat was steady while we walked through the house if not a bit rapid, but as we approached the door to Carlisle's office, its rhythm faltered and broke into dits and dashes.
"Bella, what's wrong?"
"It's just," she whispered leaning forward. "You know, he's your dad and everything. I know he's a doctor, but, it's just weird. I have to admit to your dad we're having, uh, sex?"
If her demeanor hadn't spoken her embarrassment, her emphasis on the last word did. I turned to her, cupping her face in my hands and looking into her eyes. "It's all right, love. He already knows, and as you said, he is a doctor. And we are marri–"
"He knows?"
The door upstairs flew open. "Christ, everybody knows, Bella," Emmett boomed as he bounced down the stairs. "I don't think we could put up with Edward if he weren't getting laid." He jumped down the last four steps, landing next to me and punching me in the arm. "And besides," he said, turning to Bella, "You're my sister now, and we pretty much expect that kind of stuff."
She opened her mouth to protest, but Emmett scooped her up in his arms and swung her around. "Congratulations, little sister!" His voice and mind sang in harmony with true affection. He set her back on her feet, steadying her before letting go. "You moving in soon or what?"
Bella stared at him with her mouth hanging open. "Emmett, it was a secret wedding," I reminded him. "Charlie doesn't know."
He whipped his cell phone from his pocket. "Well, let's bring him in on it! What's his number?" Though Emmett was clearly teasing, Bella paled at his words.
"Emmett," I cautioned him. His eyes flickered to my face, then turned to Bella who stood dumbstruck.
"Kidding… Geez!" He said with mock annoyance. He stooped down and looked into Bella's eyes. "Seriously, congratulations, Bella. Welcome to the family."
"Thank you," she said softly, the corners of her mouth lifting in a light smile.
Edward, if you think Bella's ready for this, bring her in. He didn't know why we were there, but our arrival was no secret. Carlisle was situated behind his desk, opening an old medical tome, trying to appear human and disinterested, posturing for Bella's comfort as I pulled her toward the door.
"Excuse us, Emmett," I said, reaching for the knob. "We need to speak to Carlisle."
"Sure, bro," he said, smirking at Bella. "A little advice from doctor love?" Bella's blush gave him all the ammunition he needed. "Whoo, Rosie, guess who's getting sexpert advice!" He ran back to his room, practically flying up the stairs, and disappearing behind the door.
"Have I mentioned how much I hate my brother?" I said sarcastically, as I pushed the door open and ushered Bella inside. She took in a deep and shuddering breath, before fixing her mouth in a tight line and walking up to Carlisle's desk. "Carlisle?"
As if on cue, Carlisle lifted his head and smiled. "Son," he said as he stood. He walked around the desk and pulled me into a brief hug, slapping me on the back. "Congratulations." He pulled away and turned to face Bella, his arms outstretched. "Daughter?" He asked, cocking his head to one side deferentially. Without hesitation, Bella dropped my hand and slid beneath his arms, returning his embrace. "You know, I've thought of you as my daughter for some time now." He pulled back, still holding her, but looking into her eyes. "I know this wedding was less than completely official, but I can't begin to describe how overjoyed we are."
"Thank you," she said softly, the blush beginning to paint her cheeks. He motioned us to sit, and Bella moved into the chair facing his desk.
Am I making her uncomfortable?
I gave a quick shake of my head. "We've come to see you as a doctor, again," I said, redirecting the conversation as I stood behind Bella. "It happened again when we were in the meadow."
"The red? You saw red?"
Bella's head snapped in my direction. "What do you mean you 'saw red', Edward?
"Yes, I –"
"What about the voices? What about -," she broke off as Carlisle's question joined the volley.
"Voices? You heard something this time?" Carlisle's eyebrows raised in question, as he spoke over Bella.
."Is this what happened in the car on the way home?" She raised her hand to her mouth, her eyes wide as saucers.
Their questions came out in a tumble, and I held up my hands to stop them, trying to find a place to start. They both fell silent, waiting for my explanations.
"I didn't know how to explain it before, as it had happened only once," I said to Carlisle. "And when we were driving home," I continued, turning to Bella, "I didn't want to frighten you, because I didn't know if it was just a one-time occurrence, or something more serious." I took a deep, unnecessary breath. "Perhaps it would be better if I described what happened, and the circumstances."
Carlisle walked behind his desk and sat, closing the huge book before him. He looked the picture of a professional, his physician persona shining out. I moved to the corner of his desk, situating myself to see them both. "In both cases, I was sexually aroused, and in both cases," Bella's cheeks flamed with embarrassment and she shielded her eyes from Carlisle. "In both cases, the pleasure was intense. I felt my restraint was weak, and wanted to…" Bella's humiliation rose and she slumped down into her seat. I hadn't been embarrassed in the slightest when I began talking, but somehow, my wife's discomfiture seemed to heighten the sensitivity of discussing the topic with my father.
Carlisle seemed to pick up on the reason for my hesitancy. "Edward, perhaps if we were to discuss this in private?"
"No." Bella's blush still burned brightly as she dropped her hand. She looked straight into Carlisle's eyes. "No, I'm his wife and I should be here. It affects me, too." She turned her gaze to me. "Go on, Edward."
"Both times, I felt my restraint was crumbling, giving into the need growing inside me. I felt… violent, enraged." Bella gulped. "On the way home, I was straining not to push myself into Bella," I said, turning my eyes to Carlisle. "I knew I'd hurt her, or break her neck. I stilled myself into immobility. Today, I wasn't as successful."
"You saw red."
"Yes. Just as when we were in the car, Bella's touch was overpowering today. I held myself still as long as I could, but it was as if a bond snapped, the binding that held me back from hurting her." I looked down to Bella, reaching across to stroke her worried brow. "Love, I tried to tell you, but in truth, I didn't want you to stop." Once again, the lovely brush of blood beneath her skin warmed my fingertips, and my body responded instinctually. As I swallowed the pooling venom, Carlisle cleared his throat.
Excuse me, Edward. "Why do you say you weren't successful today?" His brow was creased as mental images of Bella's possible injuries flew by.
"She wasn't injured, Carlisle, It's just that she so easily could have been," I said, my voice not much more than I whisper. "And –"
"And there were voices," Bella interjected.
"You heard voices?"
"Well, not so much heard, but felt," she said, her face a mask of concentration. "I thought I heard Alice, and you, but not heard. Like I said, I kind of just felt it. I don't know how to explain it right." She paused in thought for a moment, biting her thumbnail. "It was sort of like being in a dark room, when you can feel someone looking at you. I couldn't really hear them, but I felt like they – you and Alice – were there. There were others, too, but I didn't really recognize their voices or know what they said."
I was concentrating on what Bella had said so intensely, I didn't notice when she stopped talking. I had heard Carlisle and Alice also, as well as a hiker and some other, more alien mind that seemed oddly telepathic. It was as if it were speaking to someone, unaware that I had heard.
"Edward? Edward?" Carlisle touched my shoulder, and I raised my eyes to his worried expression.
"Forgive me. I was lost in thought."
"Did you experience these voices? Did you hear my voice? Did you hear Alice?"
"I heard your voices, but not your speech. What I heard sounded more like your mental voice, if you will. Alice was anticipating our return; you were reading a medical journal about seizures."
Carlisle's eyes widened in surprise. "I was reading that journal this afternoon." How would you have heard me when you were so far away?
"I don't know. This is all new to me as well," I said in response to his unspoken question. "I'm baffled by the fact that Bella heard you." She opened her mouth to speak. "Sorry love, felt you. How is that possible?"
"Clearly, we're entering into an area we haven't experienced before," Carlisle said thoughtfully. "We still don't understand all the characteristics of the venom; maybe this is something new. I'll need to get samples of your venom, Edward, for testing. How do you feel now?"
"I feel," I ran a quick inventory. "I feel fine. Anxious, I suppose, given the unknowns we're dealing with, but other than the tension that creates, I'm fit and healthy."
"I'm sure we'll get to the bottom of this," Carlisle said, his doctor persona in full effect. He smiled at Bella. "Try not to worry about it too much." And that goes for you, too, Edward. I know how you are, but try not to obsess about this. We'll figure it out.
I gave Bella my hand as she rose from the chair. "We'll do our best. Thank you, Carlisle." He walked with us as we slowly moved to the door.
"I'm glad I could help," he responded quietly.
Open the door, open the door! Let me talk to Bella! Alice's demands were as clear as if she'd screamed them aloud. I leaned into Bella's hair and whispered softly, "Beware of Alice." She turned to me with a question on her lips and in her eyes when the door opened to a maniacally bouncing pixie who sprung at her before she could catch her breath.
"Bella! Bella! Bella!" Alice bounded across the threshold, throwing her arms around Bella's neck. Bella's hand reflexively dropped mine, as she threw her arms around Alice to stabilize them both. Alice was not to be stilled; she continued to bob up and down, now taking Bella with her. "Finally! Tell me all about it! Did you love the roses? I saw the vows, wasn't the room beautiful?"
Bella looked somewhat overwhelmed, but happy. "Stop! Bouncing! Me! And I'll! Tell! You!" Alice stopped abruptly, her smile wide and infectious. Bella was breathless and flush as she smiled back at Alice. The little scene was every dream of family life I'd ever fostered come to life, and I found myself smiling, proudly, happy for their reunion.
Alice pulled Bella towards her room, and I turned to follow. Alice's hand shot out to my chest. "Edward, girl talk. Go talk to Jasper or Carlisle or something. Play the piano," she said, waiving me away dismissively. Bella glanced back at me over her shoulder as Alice squealed and pulled her away. I shrugged. I was useless against Alice's enthusiasm.
Slowly, I moved to the piano, watching Bella in Alice's thoughts. I'd grown used to seeing her through the eyes of others, and watching her now, I felt a rush of love for them both. Of course, Alice knew all this from my perspective and her vision, but she hung rapt on Bella's every tender and sweet word as she described details of our private little ceremony. I sat down on the bench, watching and listening to their conversation as my fingers brushed the keys.
I closed my eyes. I knew it was wrong to listen to their conversation, whether it came to me naturally or not. I let the melody in the back of my mind flow through my fingers to the keyboard, concentrating on the tune and releasing the dialog to the back of my mind. The ivory keys were soft and willing beneath my fingers, my accomplices in distraction. The little song unfurled against the twilight, a soft bed of longing in a sea of gray. I felt the minor chord work its way in, weaving and unraveling with the melody.
High above the melody, another thought entered, a soprano to the tenor of my song. Esme. Esme was singing in her head at her desk, her thoughts harmonious with the musical breeze of the piano. She rested her chin in her hand, closing her eyes and dreaming along with the music. It was mesmerizing and hypnotic, a dance of notes between her thoughts and my fingers. She imagined Carlisle, his beauty, strength and gentleness on their wedding night, remembering pictures of tone and song wrapped around their intertwined bodies. The reverie was captivating and seductive, and I was transported, sharing the dream with Esme, serenading the fantasy with the music flowing through me. As she dreamt, I found my fingers moving faster across the ivories as the thoughts progressed. The music grew, a crescendo working its way to the surface. Esme's eyes opened suddenly, realizing where she was and the origin of the music. She looked around her study, blinking, and I was returned to the keyboard before me.
The music nestled to an soft end, and I relaxed, my hands still on the keyboard. I opened my eyes slowly, at peace with the music. There were no thoughts in my head, nothing playing in the background. I raised my head to see Bella, Alice, and Carlisle standing awestruck on the stairs. I was immediately seized with embarrassment and weariness.
Bella moved down the stairs, followed by Alice and Carlisle. "Edward?" She walked to the bench and took my face in her hands. The heat emanating from her was soothing and welcome. I let my head bow forward in her embrace, my eyes drifting closed.
"Carlisle?" The alarm in Bella's voice made me jerk my head up, searching for the cause of her concern. Carlisle was immediately by her side. I couldn't understand what was going on; there was no one in the room who was a threat, though Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie had joined the others, and Esme's door flew open as she rushed the stairs. "Look at his hands."
I followed Bella's glance down to where my hands rested on the keyboard. My hands were gray and gnarled, the joints swollen and yellowed. I lifted them to my face, testing my ownership of the crooked, leathery fingers. As I watched, the skin smoothed and shrank, conforming back to the shape I'd known for a century. My mouth hung open in disbelief. My head turned slowly to Bella, only to see the same amazement on her face.
"Are you all right, son? How do you feel?" Carlisle leaned across Bella to place his hand on my shoulder.
"I'm…," I started, unable to work past the astonishment to find the words. I still held my hands before me, slowly turning them front to back and back again, searching to tell Carlisle what he asked. "I'm, I, uh… I feel – well. I'm well."
Carlisle's brow was creased with worry. "I think we've wasted enough time. We'd better get that sample right away, Edward."
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