It wasn't until 2 hours later that Malia stirred, a jingle filling her ears. She mumbled as she opened her eyes, looking for the source of the noise; after just a moment she saw a glowing object on the desk- a phone. As she leaned forward to grab it, she felt some resistance, her eyes opening all the way; but it was just Stiles's arm and she calmed down. Instead of trying to dislodge herself, besides she told herself it wasn't her phone so she shouldn't be looking at it anyways, she rolled over and started nudging her friend.
"Hmm?"
"Phone Stiles, is ringing."
Stiles did a one armed stretch and rubbed his eyes, "Why people be calling me? Don't they know it's nap time?"
Malia laughed as he untangled his arm and climbed off the bed to look at his phone, "Oh, it was just a text, Dad wants to come and check on us. Well what he said he'd wanted to come have lunch with us but that really means he wants to check on us. Is that okay?"
"Lunch with Sheriff? Is okay… Just Sheriff?"
"Yea, it will just be my dad, he'd warn me if anyone else was coming. What do you want to eat, he said he'd be willing to stop by somewhere on his way back. Oh, I see what you're doing Dad, think you're sneaky!"
"Sneaky, why?" Malia asked, wondering why the Sheriff had to be sneaky. Usually sneaky meant being very careful, or you were up to something bad.
"Well, I'm trying to make sure he eats healthy, so normally I try and cook dinner, so I can keep an eye on what he eats. I also have the deputies keeping an eye out for him too, they tell me how often he eats bad food as lunch when I'm not there to see him. So now, if he's offering to stop somewhere to pick up lunch, that means he'll try to order something bad for him."
"What place has not bad for Sheriff food?"
Stiles sank onto the edge of the bed while he thought, any typical fast food was out of the question, which meant no curly fries and burgers for them. Chinese food was probably not any better at this point, definitely not for lunch, sometimes for dinner that was fine, but Stiles wasn't going to encourage his dad to eat the salty foods for a midday meal.
"The only place I can think of offhand would be Sally's, it's a sandwich place, is that okay with you?"
"Sally's? I don't know Sally."
Stiles tilted his head, "You don't know… oh no, you wouldn't. Sally's is new, well, not to us, but it's new to you. It was built like 5 years ago. They make all kinds of sandwiches, all on the long rolls. It's great. What do you think you might want?"
"Sandwich, what comes on it?"
"Anything you want, or anything you don't want on it," he explained, stretching again.
Malia smiled, "No stuff?"
"No stuff," Stiles agreed, "All that's left is to decide what kind meat you want and what kind of bread."
"Bacon? Like from breakfast, was very yummy."
"Yea, they can do that, and it should be fresh, they make the bacon as it's demanded. Now, let's head down the hall and see what kind of bread you like better."
Malia yipped and jumped off the bed, leading the way back into kitchen. Stiles directed her to breadbox on the counter.
"We have white bread and then some 12 grain bread that Dad actually likes, I tend to avoid it. Don't like that much crunchy stuff in my bread." Stiles pulled out a slice of each one and handed it her. He waited as she carefully chewed on each piece and thought it over.
"White bread," she finally decided, "Too much taste in other."
"Alright, I'll text Dad and let him know, he'll probably be here in an hour or so, what do you want to do until then?"
Malia shrugged, she was here to spend time with Stiles, so anything was okay. She looked at Stiles and waited, he'd know what to do next.
Stiles put his phone in his pocket after he messaged his dad, and walked to the garage, Malia right behind him. He went over to one of the old boxes of his kid stuff- Dad hadn't been too keen on getting rid of anything. Carefully he pulled down one of the boxes, the dust flying in the air and making the two teens sneeze.
"What in box?" Malia asked, eyes bright with curiosity.
"I have a lot of stuff from when I was a youngster, I figure this might have some fun learning stuff in it. Want to give it a shot?"
"Learning? Learn what?"
Stiles shrugged rummaging through the box, "Well, we have some alphabet stuff in here, you can learn to read, write, and there is math stuff too."
"Read, I liked reading before, maybe like still?" Malia offered.
Stiles smiled and tucked the box under his arm and they went back into the living room. Stiles carefully dusted the box with a rag, to ensure that dust didn't go flying everywhere; after that he pulled out some old kid books.
"Here you go, pick the one that looks the most interesting and we'll read it. I figure listening to a story would be more fun than studying the alphabet. Afterwards we can brush up on our letters and sounds so you have a better understanding of it all. I'm thinking it will come back to you fairly fast, just like speaking did."
Malia smiled at his confidence and looked through the different books, finally deciding on The Very Hungry Caterpillar, She handed the book to Stiles and curled up next to him on the couch, ready to listen.
"Oh man, this book brings back so many memories, ok, here we go- 'In the light of the moon a little egg lay on a leaf.'"
Malia smiled as she followed Stiles fingers on the pages, then at the end of every page, she looked at the artwork. She laughed when he ate through the chocolate cake, the cheese, and so many other things.
"And he's still hungry?" she asked.
"Yup, still hungry," Stiles laughed.
Once they finished the book, Malia looked at her companion, "Is really where butterflies come from? I used to chase butterflies when I was furry."
"Yup, the caterpillars get nice and fat then they make those cocoons and after awhile they come out as butterflies. It's a pretty interesting process really."
"Very cool. This one next?" Malia asked, holding up another book already.
"Oh I forgot all about this one! If You Give a Mouse a Cookie, this is a good one too," Stiles said.
He cleared his throat and opened the book, letting Malia look at all small details of the illustrations before he started reading. They were still reading the book when Mr. Stilinski opened the door and announced himself, bag of food in his hand. Malia stiffened when he came in, still feeling nervous about seeing other people, but she managed to smile at him.
"Hey Dad, guess what we found in the garage," Stiles called out.
"Oh God, you mean besides dust?" John laughed, walking into the kitchen.
"Yea, we did find some of that. But we found a box of my old learning stuff. I've been reading to Malia, just to kinda reintroduce her to the written word."
John nodded, "Oh, and how is that going Malia?"
"Good, I like looking at the pictures while Stiles reads. But I follow along and look at letters too."
"That's nice, is it all coming back to you?"
Malia shrugged, "Little bit."
"I bet you're ready for a break, I brought lunch," the Sheriff bribed, pulling the sandwiches out of the bag.
"Oh boy!" Mali yipped and climbed into a chair eagerly.
"So Stiles, while we're eating, tell me what else you've been up to so far today."
Malia turned her head to look at Stiles when she heard the sped up heart beats, wondering what he was nervous about. But Stiles just smiled at his dad and began to explain, thankful that at least his dad didn't have superhearing.
"Well, I had just made breakfast when Malia and Mr. Tate showed up, and apparently Malia hadn't eaten breakfast-"
"Too excited!" Malia cut in, big smile on her face.
"Yea, and she liked the pancakes, and since I had some leftover batter, we made some more. Malia even flipped a pancake all by herself."
"It was wrong… but still yummy. Eat anyways," Malia informed him, not ashamed of her botched first attempt.
"She flipped it a little too slow, so it folded over," Stiles explained. "After that we actually took a nap-"
"Stiles, really? She's here to get better," John chided, keeping his tone light though, so Malia didn't worry.
"Oh but Dad, she'd been up since the crack of dawn, literally! I didn't make her take a nap. Besides it was only for like 2 hours, and now we're learning stuff."
"Yea, learning stuff!" Malia repeated, hearing that Stiles's hearbeat was slowing down again.
"Okay, okay, I suppose a nap must have been nice. What time is Mr. Tate coming back to pick her up?"
"Around 6 or so, and since we're having a late lunch, I doubt we'll have dinner before she leaves. What time do you get off work today?"
"I should be heading home by seven, are you going to make dinner for us tonight?"
Stiles nodded, "I saw that we have some frozen fish, so I'll probably make that and some kind of vegetable for us. And I see that you were actually responsible and got a turkey sandwich for lunch, go Dad."
"Yea, although I was a little bad and got the works," John admitted, although it wasn't like the sandwich didn't speak for itself.
"Works?"
"Yea, it means all the stuff, ketchup, mustard, pickles, olives, tomatoes, cheese, lettuce," Stiles explained. "Most of that stuff isn't bad, like the tomatoes and lettuce, but the mayo and cheese probably could have been left off. But Dad told me that if he couldn't get cheese on his sandwiches, neither could I, so I caved. I cannot have a sandwich with no cheese."
"I had to draw the line somewhere," John said, pointing at his son. "I can only do so much healthy before I go crazy."
Malia sat back and watch the two men talk back and forth, catching most of what they were saying but at some points, the conversation was just too fast for her. But she didn't mind, it was nice to see these two interact, it reminded her of all the time she had spent with Kaya growing up. Those memories made her happy and sad at the same time, but at least she didn't bolt from the table. But something must have shown on her face because Stiles reached out and touched her arm.
"What's going on in your head Malia?"
"Memories of Kaya, am happy and sad."
"Was that your sister?"
Malia nodded and let out a deep sigh, "Before Kaya thoughts used to make me just sad, now happy and sad is better?"
John spoke up before Stiles could, "Yea, that's better. The hurt takes a long time to go away. Actually… the hurt never goes away, it just sleeps for awhile. But it will come back from time to time, and it's okay to just be sad and cry. You just have to remember all the good stuff too, it's okay to smile too."
"I still get sad when I think of Mom, she died 8 years ago… at first I was always sad, I missed her so much. Then sometimes I would think of her and laugh, because I'd remember something happy. And I'd also cry, usually while I was laughing. Even now, some days I get sad and I miss her, but most of the time, I can smile when I think of her," Stiles added.
Malia sniffled, "So I get better too?"
"Yea, you'll get better too, you just have to let it all go. These emotions are normal, so you don't have to hide them. Hiding them is bad, it makes you sick sometimes too. If you don't hide from them, they'll heal and you can start smiling more when you remember them."
"Like what you said before?"
Stiles nodded, glad that she had made the connection; he had done his best to explain how he had felt all those years ago, and if Malia could remember what he'd said the other day about talking about things, and not keeping her emotions inside, he was sure that she'd get past this.
"Well, I'm glad that you listen to my son Malia, he's a good kid. He's been in some rough spots before, so I'm sure he'll be able to explain what you're feeling. Just don't be afraid to ask questions okay? Remember, we all want you to feel better," the Sheriff said. "I have to get back to the station now, but it was nice to see you Malia, I'm glad that you trust us to help, I know this transition can't be easy for you."
"Have nice day Sheriff, thank you for food."
"Yea, thanks Dad, it was nice to see you for lunch. At least now I know you didn't sit at your desk all day and forget to feed yourself."
John laughed and helped them clean the table before he hugged his son and then waved to Malia. He promised to be home on time for dinner, and Stiles pretended to believe him. After he left, Stiles and Malia went back into the living room and sat on the couch.
"Did you want to talk about your memories, or read more? Up to you," Stiles offered.
"Memories make me cry though, I want to be happy."
"Well, we don't have to talk about it right now, you know that. But the sooner you do talk about them, and think about them, the better you will feel. Crying isn't fun, but it really makes you feel better afterwards, on the inside."
Malia thought about what he was saying, wondering how that could be true. The last few times she'd cried, she felt exhausted afterwards and didn't want to think about anything sad. But maybe,,, maybe by really remembering, and not trying to forget will be different. Stiles was a friend, that meant he wouldn't trick her, so maybe she should try. With a heavy sigh, she started talking.
"Kaya, Kaya loved dolls, she had very many at house. Sometimes I was mean and I'd take them and hide them, just because I think funny. But Mom would get mad at me, and I'd give back. Other times, Kaya and I would play together with dolls, was fun. Mom would play too, dress up in nice clothes and all play together, I miss that."
As Malia continued to talk about some of her early memories of her sister, she felt the sadness well up in her chest. But Stiles scooted closer and wrapped an arm around her, so Malia kept talking even after the tears were streaming down her face. After awhile she couldn't talk anymore, the pain was just too much. So Stiles held her close and told her to just feel everything, kept telling her not to run away from it… and so she just kept crying.
"All that blood Stiles, was from me… I did that to them, me!"
"Not you Malia, not human you, that was the coyote part, the part you didn't know how to control."
"Coyote is me!" Malia cried out, not understanding the difference.
"It's complicated, I know when Scott first transformed, he tried to eat me a few times. And he's like my brother. It was really scary you know, I won't lie about that. It was like… he didn't know who I was at first. But that was because he didn't have control over the wolf part of him. Now he does, now he'd never hurt me."
"You think same for me?" Malia asked, hiccupping.
"Yea, I do. Was this the first time you had ever changed?" he asked. When she nodded against his shoulder, he continued, "When you first change, you aren't yourself. Part of your brain is like an animal, your human part goes to sleep kinda. It takes practice to have both parts be awake at the same time, but Scott finally learned. You didn't have time to learn, and then after the accident, you got stuck like a coyote. You never got to learn how to do both, and now you're a person again and you hate it. Because it feels wrong to you, but you can learn to be both, not one or the other."
"Like Ms. Morrell said?"
"Yup, like she said, look at Scott and Derek, they know how to be both. Isaac is still learning, sometimes he gets mad or scared and his wolf side takes over. But he hasn't hurt anyone yet and we keep practicing with him."
"What if I hurt someone? Like I hurt Mommy and Kaya?"
"That's what we're here for. I know you don't really trust Scott and the others just yet, and that's okay. But if something were to happen and you got confused, we would stop you from hurting people. I helped Scott control his wolf, I'm sure we'll figure out a way to help you too. But first, you have to get better on the inside, okay?"
"Get better first, then learn to be both?"
Stiles nodded again and felt the girl relax. They sat like that for awhile, both happy to just sit for now after the emotional moment.
"Stiles right, I feel better now on inside. Face feels not better though," Malia stated, wiping her face.
"Yea, that's the not fun part of crying, Let's go wash your face, that helps a lot."
Malia followed her friend to the bathroom and watched as he cupped his hands to collect water and then splashed his face. Then while he dried off, Malia repeated the action, loving the cold water on her face, just like Stiles had said- it felt better. Afterwards, Stiles let her sit back down on the couch and continued to read to her, figuring she had done enough progress for one day. They were still reading when Mr. Tate rang the doorbell later that evening and Malia said a sad goodbye to Stiles. But Stiles promised that they'd learn more the next day as she climbed into the car. After she was buckled in, Mr. Tate asked Stiles how the day went; Stiles paused but figured he could at least tell him most of what had happened.
"Most of the day was fairly uneventful, she helped me make more pancakes, then she said she was kinda sleepy, so we napped. We had lunch with my dad and I read some old kids books to her. But she also opened up to me, Malia knows that talking about everything will help her feel better, but it's hard to just finally let go you know? But we talked about Kaya today for a little bit. It made her really sad, and she cried for awhile, but then she said she felt better on the inside."
"Really, she spoke about Kaya? That's wonderful; I really wasn't sure how much she might remember from, before. I know Ms. Morrell told me about letting her talk to people her own age, and to not push anything, so I won't ask about it. But please, tell me the next time she brings them up?"
"I will Mr. Tate, and she knows she can talk to you too, but I think it harder with you since you are family too you know? I talked about my feelings with Scott way before I talked to my Dad after Mom died. She will open up to you too, just let it happen naturally, like Ms. Morrell said."
Mr. Tate nodded, "I will, thank you again Stiles. Have a good night."
As Mr. Tate climbed into the car, Stiles waved at Malia; he knew she had heard everything just now, so hopefully she wouldn't feel stressed about her dad asking too many questions. Judging by the calm smile on her face, she'd followed the conversation well enough. Slowly he walked back inside and messaged Scott. Now that Malia had gone home, Scott got to come bring him the homework from the day, and they could talk about practice while Stiles made dinner.