Me: The best time to wear a striped sweater—
Zero: Is all of the time.
Me: I love you Zero. Well, I mainly love your voice. It's so sexy. Your seiyuu's laugh is like crack, and your singing is like hearing someone orgasm every few seconds. Just amazing.
Zero: Not interested.
Aidou: Ugh. Humans.
Me: Mamoru Miyano is hot. HAVE YOU GUYS HEARD HIM SING? OR LAUGH? OR TALK ABOUT SYMMETRY?
Aidou: Don't plan to. Ladies, thanks for the reviews. =D I'll show up in your dreams tonight.
Me: Shiki! You know what to do while Aidou lures the ladies!
Shiki: -_- Vampire Knight belongs to Matsuri Hino.
Chapter Four:
Behind The Mask
"Dude, why are you rolling across the floor?"
"Well my dear love, no pun intended because your name basically means love, I am trying to think. I tend to roll across the floor when I begin beating up my brain to start cooperating with me. Why? Because I am fucking awesome. Like a boss."
"Uhh…What?"
"I'm a poo-poo head."
"Okay!"
Miki continued manipulating her body muscles to roll, her face smacking against the ground whenever she didn't cover it. Her mind had been so blank the past week and she couldn't put a finger to it. It felt like she was missing something, ever since her encounter with Shiki. Aidou had been looking at her strangely after that day too. Normally, she would have told him to fuck off or ask him politely to get his head out of the gutter and stop staring at her junk if she sneaked out at night to eat with Yakama. But she hadn't done that once after the day she met Shiki. Sighing deeply, she laid on her back and stared upwards into the ceiling. From the camera she set around the school, the prefects had been specifically guarding the Sun Dorm than usual giving her no time to run to the school's building. Exasperated, Miki climbed up on her bed and started her computer. "Hey Ai," she began, dawdling.
"What?"
"I got a question."
"Then ask away dumbass."
Miki grinned and tilted her head, "How come you have a crush on Rima, but you accepted pictures of Ruka from me? I thought you hated her."
"...She's pretty."
"Oh. So who do you like best?"
"Rima-sama obviously! She's just so…" Yakama's body shook slightly, and she emitted a squeal. She pulled out a large pink photo album, flipping through the pages dedicated to Rima. "Isn't Rima-sama adorable? Her petite body! Her flawless skin! Her natural hair color! The perfect Lolita girl!" Yakama rubbed her face against a close-up shot of Rima's blank expression, drool leaving her mouth. "I wish Rima-sama knew I existed! I would be her servant; make her food, pour her drinks, wash her clothes, and maybe give her back rubs! AHHHH RIMA-SAMA!"
"What about Ruka?"
"Ruka-sama's great too! She's so mature and lovely. Her looks are delicate, and she's a very independent woman—!"
"Ew." Miki shivered in disgust. Whereas Yakama was going into detail over why Ruka was so good-looking, the younger girl set off to surfing through the documents in her computer again.
Porn.
Porn.
Porn.
Kiryuu Zero laughing hysterically/him singing his heart out. She paused. Oh wait, never mind. I computerized his voice to do that to sell to his crazy fan girls. Shrugging her shoulders, Miki continued.
Porn.
Yuuki and Sayori in their cute pajamas.
My tournaments.
Porn.
The Night Class Secrets.
Po—She back tracked to the last document. What the fuck is this piece of shit doing in here? I don't remember anything about recording them. Clicking on the video, her gray eyes reflected the entire scene of Aidou biting Yuuki, skipping to the discussion of Kaname being a pureblood, some random Night class students drinking "tablets" and complaining about it, and etc. etc. Abruptly, a palm instantly flew to her forehead and made contact. She grinded her teeth together at the sear of pain tearing through her; all missing memories came flooding back.
"Miki? Miki are you okay?" Yakama jumped out from her side of the bed and next to her, voice laced with concern.
Miki remained silent.
"Oi! OI! MIKI—"
"I'M GOING TO STRANGLE THAT FUCKING BASTARD SO HARD THAT HE TURNS INTO DUST! AND WHEN HE TURNS INTO DUST, I'M GONNA GATHER HIM UP, SHOVE HIM IN A VASE, AND THEN THROW IT UP AND HIT IT WITH A BAT SO HIS REMAINS CAN GO EVERYWHERE, AND HIS FAN GIRLS CAN DANCE AND CRY IN IT! THAT FILTHY ASSHOLE!" Miki roared, thrashing on the bed wildly in anger.
"…What the fuck are you talking about?"
"I'M TALKING ABOUT THAT BASTARD SHIKI!"
"Okay, first of all, CALM DOWN BITCH. Second of all, what did he do to you?"
The blonde sucked in a breath, and then exhaled. "Remember when I waltzed back into our room the night you made me and Aidou some burritos?"
"Yeah. You came back giggling like a fan girl, and I was questioning if Aidou-senpai screwed your brains out."
"The idea of losing my virginity to him is just revolting," Miki retorted, sticking her tongue out to express her feelings of disgust. Yakama rolled her eyes at the childish actions. "Back to the main topic! That day, my mind became a little bit hazy. Everytime I try to remember something, I couldn't."
"That happens to you all of the time when you take a test or work on an assignment."
"Honey please! It's only on school subjects! I promise you I'm really cool at remembering shit when it comes to good things."
"Suuuureee."
Miki's shoulders sagged dejectedly, "Right. Anyway, it turns out—"
"You had sex? You lost your virginity? You have a thing for ARMPITS! That's freaking gross."
"FACK! SCREW IT! I DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU ANYMORE. YOU RUINED A TOTALLY BREATHTAKING SCENE WHERE I WAS SUPPOSED TO EXPRESS MY ANGSTY ANGER! THEN I WOULD CRY ABOUT IT, AND YOU WOULD HOLD ME AND GIVE ME WORDS OF COMFORT!"
Yakama plucked out the two words standing out the most to her, "Angsty anger?"
She shrugged, "It's was the only good thing I could come up with."
"Figures."
"Fack. Fack. Fack. Fack. FACK. FACK. FACK. FACK!" Miki shrieked, scrambling off the green grass field.
Sayori and Yuuki lifted their heads. "What's wrong?"
"MY FAN GIRLS! THEY HAVE COME TO EAT ME!"
"You have fan girls?" Yuuki asked, genuinely curious.
"Certainly Yuuki. She's the face of this school for sports competitions. A lot of the older students appreciate her for bumping up the school's place to at least one of the top three since freshman year," Sayori said blandly, picking at her onigiri idly. "Naturally, with her charming personality she would gain a fan club too."
"Charming?" The prefect repeated, unintentionally rude.
"Y-Yuuki!" Miki sniffed, her eyes tearing up slightly. "I'd say words going along the lines of me not wanting to live anymore because we have been friends for a long time and you should have already known this, but FACK!" Tossing her bag to Sayori, Miki zipped through the courtyard and began running away from her enthusiastic fan club before they could catch her agile body in their nets. Eyes darting around frantically, she shoved a tall male aside and took a dive in the bush as soon as four girls popped out from the corner.
"Where did she go?"
"Damn it! I was supposed to give her my shoes so she could throw up in it!"
"Okay, we seriously need to schedule when we're going to kidnap her. It'd be much more efficient than what we're doing now."
"Probably. Ahh...What if I never get her autographed gum before I graduate?"
"That would suck."
"Ha! I did better than you! I collected all of the hair that she dropped and made a wig into it!"
"SHARE IT!" The girls began walking away, arguing. Miki was currently green in the face, stilling her breath to remain silent and not start bawling at the top of her lungs.
"They're gone."
She blinked owlishly. Poking her head out from the leafy bush, piercing lavender eyes struck her figure immediately. "HIIIIEEEEE!"
Zero scowled. "Get out the bush Watanabe. People are beginning to stare."
"Aye, aye captain Jack Sparrow!" Miki chirped, saluting him. As soon as she was about to step out, she was tugged backwards and sat there in the slightly thorny bush. Trying to move again, Miki found she couldn't. Her face paled to the exact shade of Zero's skin color. It looked out of place on the tan girl. "Hey umm...I don't want to freak you out, but….I'm stuck."
Zero cocked a brow. "You're stuck?"
"In a bush."
"You're stuck in a bush," Zero repeated incredulously.
"NO WAY."
Zero sighed and thrust his hands into his pocket. "I'll see you in class then Watanabe."
"WAIT ZERO! HELP MEEEEE! I DON'T WANT TO STAY HERE FOREVER! WHAT IF MY FANGIRLS CATCH ME?"
"You can rot along with them."
"Don't be like that Zero! I'll give you pictures of Yuuki in her pajamas!"
A light pink color dusted across his cheeks and he turned his head to the side. "I don't want it."
"You leave me no choice then. If you don't help me out, I'll release a video of you showering to the entire school."
"You wouldn't," Zero hissed. If there was anything the ex-human understood about Watanabe Miki like everyone else, it was that she knew how to get around things you couldn't have possibly imagine. Marihuana? You want it, you got it as long as you had the money. She could send you to the drug dealer personally. (Miki only handed the information out to people who had good reasons. Not the half-assed excuses, "I just want to try it." Normally, she denied everyone.) Pictures of your crush? Fork up the cash, and you could have the person in any pose you want. Zero had no doubts that her connections extended across the entire city. In short, she was a manipulative bitch willing to do anything for money besides sell herself.
Zero didn't necessarily get along with people like her; normally he would have just ignored Miki, but she wouldn't let him. Miki was too persistent and annoying; she tested his patience too much on purpose. At one time, her personality had been predictable to him. A single glance and he could decipher everything about her like the next stranger he saw. Unfortunately, her personality had been taking twists and turns when she began associating with the Night Class. Her mind had been getting sharper than she let off to her classmates. He probably wouldn't pick up on her intelligence had she not been interfering with his prefect duties, sneaking out to the school building with Yakama.
She beamed at him arrogantly, "I would."
He glared at her. "I'll help you out if you delete it. No more files of me showering, and no more selling it. Get rid of the entire video."
"Do I honestly have to?"
"Yes."
"Fine." Miki extended a hand out to him, hoping he would grasp it.
Zero recoiled. "How do I know you'll actually do it?"
"You don't," she said truthfully, eyes sparking with pure glee. "We grow up hearing lies all of the time Zero. I grew up with the mentality that adults are all liars. It's my choice whether or not I want to take after their habit or change. That's why it's my decision for me to tell the truth, or just not say anything at all. I may be a lot of things, but a liar I am not. Trust me."
The silver-haired grimaced. Trust me? Ha. Trust an idiot to say those words I longed to hear. Grunting, he coiled his fingers around her wrist and yanked her out of the bush.
"WHOOO! I'M FREE! I'M FREE! No sexual innuendo intended," Miki giggled, jumping up in joy.
"I expect you to keep to your end of the bargain."
"I will~." Doesn't mean I have to delete the other files I collected of you Zero. You only said video of you showering. "OH SHIT. COME ON BRUH! WE BEZ LATE TO CLASSES FIFTY!"
"It's Zero."
"Uh huh. So sixty-nine—"
"It's Zero," he repeated irritably.
"—What do you say to those pajama pictures of Yuuki? I can hook you up with it for free. You look like a pretty lonely guy."
Kiryuu Zero learned a lesson that Friday: Leave Watanabe Miki alone. Literally.
"Wow, it's so crowded today!" Miki hummed idly.
"Stop moving! I can't see them if I'm concentrating on something else dickhead!" Yakama snapped. The lesbian was perched on top of Miki's shoulders, holding onto her head to not fall off as Miki was swinging her body from side to side.
"HEY! At least I decided to help you!"
"Oh shut up! OW! FUCK! STOP HITTING YOUR HEAD AGAINST MY CROTCH!"
"THEN STOP ANNOYING ME YOU DUMB FUCK!"
"YOU'RE THE ONE ACTING LIKE A CUNT!"
"WEELLLL EXCCUUUUSEEEE ME, PRINCESS."
The two broke out into argument, bringing all of the attention to them. Aidou peered through the group of short girls crowding them and was not surprised to see the pair of idiots. "Should we be doing something?" he asked.
"They're providing a distraction. Let's go while we can escape," Kaname stated, walking away. After he said hello to a flustered Yuuki.
"Hanabusa, come on," Kain muttered, gripping onto his elbow.
"Just give me a minute."
When Miki had grabbed Yakama by the legs and threw her to the crowd, she screamed, "CATCH!" Yakama screeched at the top of her lungs and then crashed into them, knocking everyone down. "That took care of the problem…ssss!"
"Watanabe."
Her eyes landed on Aidou's tall frame. A smile tugged at her lips. "Yeeeesssssss?"
"You haven't..." He grunted. What was he supposed to say? "You haven't been showing up for the whole week."
"What about it?" Miki asked earnestly, curious. Aidou then appeared embarrassed. Smiling, she patted his shoulders. "Miss your entertainment huh? Don't worry, I missed you too."
Aidou scowled, "Who said I miss your arrogant face?"
"I do~."
"Narcissist."
"I know." She blew him an imaginary kiss that he swatted away. "I love you too honey~."
Aidou rolled his eyes. "I do too, sweetie."
"You're my favorite lollipop!"
"And you're my delicious cupcake!"
"You're like the sun to my moon!"
"Too bad the sun and the moon can't be together."
"You know what say about big feet: Have sex with me."
He blushed. "You're sick."
She got down dirty, "Baby, I love to suck you all day and all night."
"It's funny because I don't."
"But I do."
"I don't."
Miki stomped her feet, "BUT I DO!"
"BUT I DON'T!"
"Are you two done yet?" Zero interrupted.
They looked at his blank expression and Yuuki's scarlet face. Aidou coughed, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. "I'll go now before Kaname-sama yells at me." Or slaps me in the face.
"BYYYYEEEE BABY!"
"You really enjoy teasing him don't you?" Yuuki sighed, smiling softly.
"The more important subject is what to do with all of these knocked out species….HAVE FUN WITH THAT GUYS!" Miki lifted Yakama off the floor and giggled loudly, skipping away hurriedly.
"…Should we run after her?"
"….."
"Zero? Zero?" Yuuki almost cried when she discovered Zero had left her.
"Forget it. I'm sneaking out tonight. I've been losing too much weight from not eating at night," Miki growled, pissed off. "I don't care if I have to kill Zero or Yuuki. They will both die if they get in the way of my snack time! ARE YOU COMING WITH ME AI?"
"Nah. I don't feel like it."
"YOU'RE COMING WITH ME!"
Miki wrapped Yakama up in a blanket and threw her over her shoulder. "TO THE DAMN KITCHEN!"
"MMFFPH! MMMFFF!"
Twenty Minutes Later
"I really hate you."
"I want katsudon this time please!" Miki sang, playing with a pair of chopstick.
A seat was pulled up next to her and she smirked. "Make some for me too."
"Hey baby~."
"Yes cupcake?"
She snaked an arm around his waist playfully. "You want to…you know….Eat some chocolate frostings? Because I'm like, starving. Seriously."
Aidou didn't look amused. "So your response is to eat chocolate frostings?"
"Basically."
"Idiot." Aidou removed her arm, feeling uncomfortable from the intense gaze she sent him.
"YOU KNOW WHAT?"
"WHAT?"
"I'M GOING TO EAT YOUR SHARE OF THE KATSUDON!"
"AS IF."
"YEAH!"
Yakama face palmed. The price she paid over losing a simple bet.
"Bro."
"I am not your bro."
"Uh huh. So bro. Do you like, get turned on when you cut yourself?"
"What's that supposed to mean!"
"Well…you're a vampire!"
"No shit."
"Meaning if you cut yourself and see your blood, don't you get turned on? Or you start sucking your blood."
"….." Aidou turned red and casted his eyes downward to his lap. "It's none of your business. And wait...you remembered? How? Shiki erased your memories!"
"I watched a video and remembered everything. NOW TELL ME."
"Forget it!"
"COME ON! DON'T BE LIKE THAT ASSHAT!"
"YOU INSOLENT HUMAN—"
"Your food is done, fat asses."
They both dug into their meal immediately.
"You two are fucking fat."
"Rude!" Aidou exclaimed, holding a hand to his chest.
"I know! See man, this is what I have to deal with twenty-one-six!" It's twenty-four-seven, dumb ass.
"I feel for you."
"Ugh!" Yakama had her hands on her hips. "This is the thanks I get? People have no manners these days!"
"I don't respect humans."
"I don't respect lesbians."
Aidou cocked an eyebrow. "That joke's too harsh, don't you think so?"
"You're right. I don't respect people who won't rape me."
Aidou began choking on his katsudon violently.
"You guys are…Ugh. Whatever. I'm gonna leave before I get caught with a bunch of idiots. See ya around." Putting up the pots and pans she used, Yakama fixed her pajamas and exited the room briskly in a huffy manner.
"Are you…gay?"
Miki laughed, "No! I don't swing that way! It's only a joke to piss her off."
"Oh." Maybe it was just him, but Aidou felt discomfort by the mere fact that he sounded too relieved. Aidou stuffed his mouth with spoonful of rice, chewing intently. Why the hell was he so bothered by Miki? She was just a normal human. And he questioned his sanity for getting excited in the afternoon, wondering what she was scheming in her head. He stiffened when she took a strand of his hair, playing with the ends. "What do you think you're doing Watanabe?"
"Just looking," Miki hummed, running her hands through them. "Your hair's really pretty. What's awesome is that it's not fake too!"
"Of course! I'm Aidou Hanabusa. My looks are all natural, " he retorted haughtily, slapping her hand away.
"It's unfair!"
"How is it unfair?"
"You're a vampire! Vampires all have that "I'm fucking beautiful bitch, look at me!" aura around them. I'm human! I couldn't be pretty if I tried."
"That's not true."
"Really? You think I'm pretty?"
Aidou smirked, "Actually, I was going to say that some humans are pretty."
"You suck." Miki stood up and strode over to the other side, washing the bowl under the sink neatly. "Hey, if you're done, hand me your stuff. I'll wash it for you…What? I'm being serious here! Geeze bruh! You need to calm your wet panties down. We're friends. "
"Friends?" Aidou repeated, his eyes widening a fraction.
"I'm going to slap myself across the face if that word is not in your dictionary."
Aidou scowled, "That's not what I mean! Since when were we friends? You can barely remember my name!"
"That's not true! I remember your name perfectly!"
"What's my name then."
"Aidou."
"S—"
"Hannibal. Aidou Hannibal."
"…..Just go wash the dishes."
"Okay! Hey best friend, you want me to wash that for you or what?"
Aidou Hanabusa was going to kill himself one day because of Watanabe Miki.
Me: There's more of a dialogue than anything in this chapter because I just enjoy writing conversations between idiots...And because I hate writing deep meaningful paragraphs for simple insults. Like, seriously? You guys get the point. No need for me to shit out my brains trying to explain why their insults are so vulgar. Even a monkey could figure it out. RIGHT ZERO? LAUGH WITH ME!
Zero: No.
Me: LAUGH ZERO, LAUGH! YOUR LAUGH IS SO ADORABLE! MAMORU MIYANO VOICED YOU DAMMIT!
Zero: The answer is still no.
Me: Damn. TT^TT