Don't Cry For Pain

Chapter Four: "Perspectives."

Hey,

Sorry it took so long to post. What do you think?

Special thanks to reviewers: Swizzle4, Alex, and Cynnamon Spyce, as well as two anonymous reviewers. I thank you.

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Thanks for reading,

~ Jane McB.

What in Heaven's name…!? Hermione thought, as Pansy Parkinson silently took a seat next to her. Hermione stared in open-mouthed shock at the dark-haired girl.

Pansy Parkinson is sitting next to me at the Gryffindor table!? But that's… that's just not possible! Hermione thought in panicked disbelief.

Hermione looked over at Ron and Harry. Harry was staring at Parkinson in wide-eyed confusion, while Ronald looked as though he might faint at any moment – and who could blame him? After all, this is the same girl who hung on Malfoy's every syllable, and although she had never directly insulted any of the Golden Trio, she had laughed at every joke, every barb aimed at them. And now here she was, sitting next to Gryffindor's resident know-it-all – committing social suicide.

A student of one House sitting at an opposing House's table in the Great Hall was absolutely unheard of, maybe even forbidden. As it had never happened before, due to House rivalry, Hermione had never had cause to know, but now that it had, she had every intention of finding out as soon as dinner was over. She'd been planning on going to the Library after dinner anyway, to get a head start on her O.W.L.s. As it was, it was going to drive her crazy to go through dinner, not knowing.

As Hermione watched Parkinson pick nonexistent lint from her robes, she couldn't help but wonder if Parkinson's sudden, but apparent lack of regard to social standing was due to her parents' violent murders. The Parkinson murder it seemed was all anyone was talking about these days. It had been when Hermione had gone to Diagon Alley with the Weasleys to purchase school supplies that she had first heard of it. As there were currently no suspects in the case, a good deal of speculation was taking place. Some said it was an old enemy of Mr. Parkinson's that had done it. Some said that Pansy Parkinson had killed her parents, and that was why she wasn't very broken up about it, although Hermione highly doubted it. There seemed very little reason for Parkinson to want to kill her parents, and although she may not be Mother Theresa, she certainly didn't seem the type to go around hacking her parents to pieces. After all, she wasn't Lizzy Borden.

Hermione had read the Daily Prophet article on the Parkinson murder, and although to the untrained eye the feelings expressed in it might appear genuine, Hermione knew better than to trust anything written by Rita Skeeter. But even so, to see Parkinson so calm, so at ease, as though nothing in the world had happened...

She seemed almost… indifferent.

And was that a… a smile? Is she actually smiling!? Hermione thought horrified. She had been expecting composure, as Parkinson didn't seem the type to break down and cry for all the world to see, but this… this indifference? She seemed almost… happy.

The likelihood of Parkinson killing her parents wasn't beginning to seem all that unlikely after all.

Hermione nearly jumped out of her robes when she was actually addressed by the girl in question.

"So, are you pretty worried about O.W.L.s?"

Hermione didn't get a chance to answer before Dumbledore stood and began his welcoming speech.

For the first time in years, Albus Dumbledore was good and truly speechless. Never had a student, or anyone for that matter, so shocked him as Pansy Parkinson had when she had sat, not at her own House's table, but at the table of Slytherin's sworn enemy, Gryffindor. For a man like Albus Dumbldore to be so shocked that he could not speak was itself unspeakable. The man who always had something to say, the man who (almost) always had the answer, the man who knew everything about everybody, except, perhaps Voldemort, was never ever speechless.

Albus had always hoped to eventually dissolve the Houses into one House so that the constant feuds might cease, but he knew that such an event would very likely not take place in his lifetime as the parents of the students would certainly oppose such an occurrence. To see someone like Miss Parkinson do something so in opposition to the expectations of others, for her to defy custom at the cost of her social life, for a Slytherin student to sit at the Gryffindor table was something that had never in the history of Hogwart's ever happened before.

He had to wonder if this was not some part of the aftershock of her parents' deaths, and yet she seemed… so calm, so relaxed, as though everything was just as it had been before. Actually, now that Albus was really looking at Miss Parkinson, it seemed rather obvious that she was more carefree and relaxed than she had ever seemed at her own table, or at any time in the past that he could recall.

She seemed completely unaffected by her parents' demise. Albus suddenly realized that perhaps he didn't know everything about everyone after all.

Severus Snape had never been so outraged in the entirety of his life. What betrayal was this? One of his own students from his own House was making nice with that insufferable Gryffindor know-it-all? And Miss Parkinson, at that? Had the girl gone mad? Besides, wasn't it against the rules for a student to sit at the table of a House, not their own?

Severus looked over at the Headmaster with a withering look that demanded some sort of action from him. The Headmaster's eyes twinkled merrily and he winked at Severus just before rising to make the Welcoming Speech. He wasn't going to do a thing.

Severus wanted nothing more than to hex him.

For the second time that day, Pansy Parkinson had shocked Draco Malfoy speechless. To sit at the Gryffindor table was bad enough, but did she have to sit next to her? Never in his entire life had Draco felt so envious of another human being.

For years Draco had longed for the attention of one, Hermione Granger. Unfortunately, her muggle heritage made his feelings for her dangerous to both of them. If ever his father found out… well, to say the least, Hermione and Draco would both be in serious mortal danger.

Hermione. What wouldn't he do for his Hermione? Having been raised by a father like his, Draco had never really understood what love was until he met Hermione. How it killed him to see her cry when he called her dirty names he didn't even mean. How he longed to tell her how he really felt. Draco knew that he sounded somewhat like a bad romance novel, but he didn't care. If the danger were only to himself, he would have told her long ago. Society be damned! Pride be damned! He didn't care if he looked like a fool. All he wanted was for her to say she'd even consider loving him.

Seeing her everyday and not being able to touch her, hold her, tell her he loved everything about her from her frizzy hair and freckled nose, to her bossy know-it-all attitude, was absolute torment. To see Pansy take the place he'd so longed for by her side, talking to her, smiling at her, perhaps even becoming friends with her, made him want to jump up out of his seat and throw himself off the Astronomy Tower. It was too much for anyone to bear.

He'd never hated clingy, snarky, former Slytherin Queen, Pansy Parkinson more than when he jumped out of his seat to head to his room, not caring about the requirement that students remain in the Great Hall during the Welcoming Speech, which was taking place that very moment.

Tell me what you think! I love to hear from you.

~ Jane McB.