Chapter 4: Fiendship

When they arrived at Hogwarts, Harry could not help but feel giddy. He sensed the collective excitement of his fellow first years as he stepped off the train. He was surrounded by strangers, but they all shared the same dreams. He forgot all of his problems and enjoyed the moment. When the castle first came into view, he could almost hear John William's score playing in the soundtrack of his life.

"Wow," James said, absolutely amazed. He wished that he could have experienced his first sight of Hogwarts with Jessie and Meowth, but he hadn't been able to find them after getting off the train. They probably wouldn't appreciate it like he did anyway. It was good to share the memory of his boat ride to Hogwarts with his new friend Harry.

When they entered the castle, Maggie Smith explained to them how they would be sorted into houses based on whether they were brave, ambitious, intelligent, or kind. The segregation of personalities would ensure that they did not question their values. The school founders apparently had a problem with diversity, and none of the following headmasters had the sense to alter the house system.

The current headmaster Albus Dumbledore did support cooperation between the houses, promoting events like a "Slytherclaw winter dance" or a "Gryffinpuff bake-off," but he enjoyed the different house colors and their cute scarves too much to do away with the system entirely.

As they waited in the hall before the sorting ceremony, Harry spotted Ash and Draco. They had apparently gotten to know each other better on the train ride, because they were holding hands. As if that wasn't enough, their Pokémon were snuggling with each other. If Caterpie had hands he certainly would have been holding hands with Pikachu.

"Why did you want to steal that kid's Pokémon?" Harry asked James, noticing how his new friend was staring at the mouse with lust.

James could not simply reveal his plan to be the world's greatest dark wizard to someone he just met. He would wait until he was officially Harry's best friend before he exchanged secrets with him. Maybe he could even get Harry to join Team Rocket, if they ended up being sorted into Slytherin together.

"Well, I don't really like my Pokémon, so I wanted another one," James lied. He could not have known that Harry felt the same way about his own Pokémon. Harry, who believed that James had the same problem that he had, suddenly felt much closer to him.

Harry looked around at his new classmates, trying to find someone with a Clefairy. He noticed a red headed boy with a Rattata, flirting with a red headed girl with a Goldeen. Harry's greatest fear was of ghosts, and his second greatest fear was of gingers. There was no alternate universe where he could have been best friends with a creepy ginger kid, especially not a ginger who came from a whole family of evil gingers. He hated gingers almost as much as he hated blondes.

While Harry passed judgement on his classmates' hair, James scanned the crowd for his friends. He thought that Jessie would stand out, due to her hair being so huge and bright, but he could not find her. He did notice a girl with frizzy brown hair who was trying to escape from a tan guy who had his eyes closed. This boy was aggressively hitting on the geeky girl, but she was clearly not interested. James wondered how the creep could find the girl worth pursuing, she was not very attractive but then considered that he must have bad vision since he refused to open his eyes.

Luckily, they were called into the great hall before any of the couples could take their feelings further. The frizzy haired girl, Hermione Granger, was the first to be sorted. She was put in Gryffindor. Harry liked the Gryffindor colors, so he hoped he could be sorted into that house.

Next, Jessie was called up. James tried to wave to her, but she didn't see him. Harry was very impressed by her hair. He wished that his hair could be just like hers. He would need to ask her about her hair later, so they could become friends and he could steal her hairstyle. She was sorted into Slytherin.

Draco followed. He was immediately put into Slytherin. Then it was his boyfriend's turn. The hat paused for a moment after being placed on Ash's head, unsure of where to place the boy.

"You are a loudmouth, which makes me want to put you in Gryffindor," the hat speculated. "Yet, you want to be the very best? Like no one ever was?"

The hat seemed impressed by the boy's ambition, and Ash clearly wanted to be with Draco. They stared into each other's eyes as they waited for the hat's decision.

"Slytherin!" the hat declared. Ash grinned and ran to join his blondie bear.

After that, the two ginger kids, Ron and Misty, were both sorted into Gryffindor. Brock, the creepy tan guy, was put in Hufflepuff. He cried, disappointed that he wasn't in the same house as Hermione.

Then it was Harry's turn. He stepped up and put the hat on, so nervous he almost peed his pants. He wanted to be in the same house as his new friend, but he didn't want to be stuck with Draco and Ash. He didn't know what he wanted. All he knew was that he wanted a Clefairy, and a donut. He could really go for a maple donut.

"Gryffindor!" the hat cried. Harry ran to his table, full of joy. He would get to wear the snazzy red and gold scarf.

James was the last to be sorted. He made eye contact with Jessie, who had her fingers crossed. He needed to be in Slytherin, how else could he be a dark wizard? But he also wanted to be with Harry. He was so confused. How could he choose between Slytherin and Gryffindor? Snakes and lions were both so cool.

"Hufflepuff!" the hat declared. James was horrified. Jessie laughed at the situation, but inside she was upset that she was separated from her partner. Harry was sad that James couldn't be in Gryffindor with him, but then again, yellow did seem like a better color for him.

James went to the Hufflepuff table and took a seat beside Brock. Brock mistook James for a girl and tried flirting with him, but James revealed his maleness by shouting that he wanted to be left alone.

The feast began. Harry began chatting with Hermione and Ron, trying to ignore their awful hair. James stared at his plate, too sad to eat anything. Suddenly, he felt something mushy hit him in the back of the head. It was a ball of cheese that Ash had thrown at him from the Slytherin table. Ash laughed, pleased to get revenge for the attempted theft on the train. Draco was inspired by Ash's delinquent behavior, throwing a potato at Harry.

Harry turned around and glared at Draco and Ash. He had intended to ignore those two for the rest of their time at school together, but now he had no choice but to go to war with them. He had to prove to them that courage was better than cunning, that red was prettier than green, and that Clefairy were better than stupid bug and mice Pokémon.