DTI: RELOADED Chapter 2: Rescue Mission, a digimon fanfic

Digimon Tamers International: RELOADED

Written by Greg Palmer

Chapter 2: Rescue Mission

Greg

We were walking through the canyons. The spiky-haired girl- by the way, her name's Rika, and if you rearrange the letters, you get Kari- thought she saw some satellites, but it was just a bunch of rock sculptures. They looked really convincing, though. It got dark all of a sudden, so we stopped where we were. Suddenly, Rika spotted something. "We have company," she said. She pointed up, and there was this thing made of fire. "Whoa- the Human Torch," I noted with awe.

Henry pulled out his Digivice and pointed it at the beast, and his profile came up. "That's no Human Torch, that's Meramon! Champion level... his special attack is Magma Blast!" He sounded afraid. I didn't think about it at the moment. "Hey, how'd you do that?" I asked. Before I got an answer, the Digimon attacked. "MAGMA BLAST!" the monster shouted, and he fired magma rocks down at us.

Renamon just shouted, "RUN!" so we did. We got down, and fast! Just then, Leomon jumped up and punched Meramon into a crater, cooling him off. "I hope you're happy," Meramon said, "Go ahead and absorb me now!" Leomon just shook his head as Takato got up and looked down. "We wouldn't have attacked you if you didn't attack us. Did the Devas send you?" he asked.

"Devas? What are those?" I asked Rika. She just rolled her eyes and ignored me. I kept asking around. Finally, I got the answer from Henry. They're twelve Ultimate-level Holy Beast Digimon the group had been fighting for some time.

Later on, we had a meeting with him. Turns out Leomon's punch knocked him to his senses, and he was an all right guy. Takato did some sketches of this small Digimon, Calumon, and one of those Devas. This particular one, Makuramon, looked like a monkey to me. Meramon had no leads, but he mentioned something about going to the real world. I wanted to tell him it wasn't that much, but I decided against it. After all, why smash the dreams of a Digimon made of fire?

We set up camp and tried to catch some Zs. Takato ended up looking at the night "sky". "A shooting star! Oh...this place never ceases to amaze me. And all Meramon dreams of is fighting and getting strong enough to go to the Real World. I wonder why," he said. "Probably because it's different than here," I guessed. "He just can't help it," Henry added.

The two got into a conversation. "Hey, couldn't sleep either?" "No way, not a wink, too wired. How bout you?" Henry asked. "Same thing."

"Well, who wouldn't be wired after coming here?" I asked.

I couldn't help but wonder what was going on back at home, or whether I would even go home again. It was a depressing moment. Of course, I also had something to prove to these people, being outsiders. Turns out they were all from Shinjuku, Tokyo. They were also big Digimon fans, so we kept ourselves busy discussing the adventures of our heroes. It turns out there was a lot Saban cut out of the original series, like Ken actually kicking a puppy and TK actually having a name. His real name's Takeru. It makes sense when you think about it. I told Veemon all about this and about his fictional counterpart, and he just smiled and went on.

Something came that night. There was a rumbling sound. Renamon (the fox-type lady Digimon) was the first to notice, and she went out on the prowl. Actually, she jumped out on a high bluff and looked out over the terrain. I was amazed she could jump that high. I also wondered if Veemon could do the same thing. Rika pulled out her D-Arc and pulled up a profile. "Jagamon, ultimate level plant Digimon that travel in herds." she reported breathlessly. There was just something about her voice at that moment. My gosh...

Renamon started getting desperate. "They're coming right at us. Let's go!" she called as jumped down. Leomon picked up Jeri and Rika in his arms. Renamon picked up Kazu and his pal Kenta with her hands, and I shook Veemon awake. "Huh? Who turned on the vibrator?" he asked, half asleep. "We're in the middle of a stampede, come on!" I shouted. We ran out of the way, but Takato and Guilmon stood there like a deer in front of the headlights of a Plymouth Voyager. Takato got out of the way himself, but he nearly didn't make it. Henry and Guilmon had to pull him in. Meramon fired his Magma Blast, trying to save us, but a group diverted and hit him straight on. He died, and we were blown away.

The next morning, if you could call it that, we built a rock shrine to him. Takato even drew a sketch. He's quite the artist. That day, Kazu tried pulling up some breakfast. It was just a Jagamon. In fact, it was a whole herd of Jagamon. They like burying themselves in the ground like potatoes. It was weird. They also pointed us toward where they thought Makuramon had went. So, we continued walking. That is... until Renamon noticed a data stream... just behind Kazu and Kenta. Who knows where it would've sent us. So, we ran one way and those two went another. Rika and Renamon went right after them. Unfortunately, they didn't make it.

Kazu

The data stream picked us up and threw us into a pit. "A bottomless pit, no fair!" Kenta whined as we started freefalling. "Man, when you say bottomless you really mean bottomless!" I added. Even in zero gravity, Rika was a grouch. "If we're going to die, the last thing I wanna hear is either one of you," she griped.

Good news was, there was a bottom. Rika tried to get up. "Oh, my back," she groaned. She'd landed on my head. "Your back, my head!" I shot back. Kenta ended up flat on his back. "Do you guys mind? Some people are trying to pass out over here," he said. I couldn't help but agree. "Good idea." "Ugh..."

We laid there for a while, listening to the wind. Suddenly, the wind stopped. I could hear Rika's Digimon. "Uh. Huh? Rika." "Five more minutes. Huh? Renamon."

Rika

Rika here, and don't you forget it. I looked around, trying to figure out just where we were. "Uh, Renamon, where are we?" I asked. Then, as it always does, it came to me. "Oh wait, I remember, the Digital World." Ended up answering my own question. I spotted something, some kind of a sphere. "Huh! Is that what I think it is?"

Renamon nodded. "Yes, planet Earth."

"But it's so far away. What if we can't ever get back?" I asked. Renamon changed the subject, "The world has changed since I left. Look at how barren it's become." She was right. Nothing but rocks and dirt as far as the eye could see. It looked like a real wasteland.

"Yeah, this is kind of how I pictured the inside of Kazu's head," I commented. Then, I spotted something in the distance. "Wait, are those houses?"

"I believe so," Renamon answered. I couldn't figure them out. "What's on top of them? They look like giant dish towels. I wonder what they're for." "Yes, and I wonder why all the branches on the trees are pointing in one direction," my partner added. I looked, and sure enough, they were.

"I don't know. I've got a really bad feeling about this, Renamon. We've gotta get back to the others, if we can," I said.

Suddenly, I heard this really annoying, loud sound. Renamon had to cover her ears. "What is that horrible sound?" she wondered. "It's like a rusty freight train hauling bagpipes," I added.

We kept walking until we found where the sound was coming from. Sure enough, it was Kazu and Kenta snoring. Should've known. "Are you kidding me? This is exactly why I didn't want them tagging along in the first place. Amateurs! Hey wake up! They both want to be called Digimon Tamers and then, they fall asleep. If they ever do get a Digimon, they might as well just go and order them to jump off a bridge."

Greg

"That decides it," Henry said with conviction, "We'll just have to work with what we have." He turned to me. "Greg?" "Uh, yeah?" I asked. "You're new here so I'll train you myself," he decided. Veemon and I fist-bumped.

Henry started teaching me how to use the D-Arc in some sort of sparring practice. He started off by taking out his Digivice and pointing it to Veemon. He pushed a button on the side. Looking over his shoulder, I could see a hologram of my partner and his stats. "So it's like a Pokédex?" I asked him. He was speechless. "Uh... yeah," he finally said, "You can discover the other features as you go, but Digi-Modification is really important."

He took out a card from his deck holster and let me look at it. It had a bunch of Japanese writing, but it had some English as well. Next, he grinned and stood back. "Watch this," he said.

He took the card, did a few quick arm movements, then scanned the card through the side of his D-Arc. "Digi-Modify!" he shouted. Then, he finished scanning the card and held it up. "Defense Activate!" Terriermon glowed for a second or two, but that was it.

"That's it?" I asked, "You mean that's actually it?" Henry just had this grin on his face. "Try attacking Terriermon," he hinted. "Oh, right. Veemon, you heard the man!" I shouted. He looked around. "What man? Where?"

He then looked to me, and I facepalmed. "Just attack the bunny, Veemon," I said. Veemon gave a short nod then started running toward Terriermon. "Vee Headbutt!" he called as he tackled into him, but the bunny didn't move! He didn't even feel the hit, but Veemon sure did! In fact, he ended up on his stomach holding his head. I calmly walked over to my fallen friend. "Nice," I commented, "I've got a question, though. Do you have to copy the arm movements?"

Henry shook his head. "Heh, maybe I was showing off," he answered, "All you have to do is scan the card through the side of the D-Arc, call out 'Digi-Modify', the name of the card, and then 'Activate'."

Henry

Hi there, this is Henry. Wanted to bring you a status report on the newest Tamer, Greg. I've taken him under my wing, so to speak, but there are times I've regretted it. There was the time I taught him the Card Slash technique (which is used to Digi-Modify). I think he gets easily distracted by my movements, because they're so complex. Every time he tried to copy them, he completely missed the scanner and looked sloppy. "You don't have to copy the movements," I said, "Just scan the card." I moved my focus to scanning the card. He did that, but scanned the card just a bit too fast. Then, he scanned it too slowly. Then, he scanned it at just the right speed, but backwards.

"OK, so do you remember how you got Veemon?" I asked him. "Yeah, I scanned the blue card through this," he said. "Great. Just scan the card like you did then." After about an hour of practice just scanning a card, he got it. That's about twice as long as Takato took when I trained him, and he didn't get it that much either at first. At least, he was eager and willing.

Greg

After a few hours of training, Henry gave me the duty of going hunting. There had to be some food somewhere, so Veemon and I would look for it. When Digimon die, they get deleted (as we learned tragically from Meramon's death). I'd be looking around for communities and sources of food. Plus, if I found the others, I'd bring them back with me.

Takato gave me his backpack to bring back any plants or anything like that. "Ready, Veemon?" I asked my partner. Veemon gave me a thumbs-up. "Ready when you are, Greg," he replied. I pulled out my D-Arc and the DigiEgg of Friendship card. I tried spinning the card around, like I had seen Henry and Takato do, but I dropped it. I looked back, and Takato facepalmed. I picked up the card and decided not to spin it, but scanned it anyway, remembering to shout "Digi-Modify!" I finished scanning the card and held it up to the sky. "DigiEgg of Friendship Activate!" There was about a 3-second delay before the card kicked in. Throwing back to Adventure 02, I quickly added, "DigiArmor Energize!" A beam of light shot out of my Digivice and hit Veemon.

ARMOR DIGIVOLUTION_

Suddenly, a ball of orange light formed around Veemon. "Veemon Armor Digivolve to..." He shouted as his skin peeled off, revealing a navy blue network. The ball he was in transformed into the DigiEgg of Friendship as elements from the egg implanted themselves into the network. What seemed like a few seconds later (it's much faster in reality than it is on TV), Raidramon appeared, along with his name in both Roman letters and katana. "Raidramon, the Storm of Friendship!"

"Very impressive," I said, "However... how'd you get those letters behind you?" Raidramon just glanced at me. "Are you sure you should be asking me that question, Greg?" he asked. His voice sounded different, but I could still tell it was Veemon. There was a much more important question, and that was how to even mount him. I tried jumping on him, but that didn't work. Finally, Raidramon kneeled down and I boarded him. Then, he stood up. I didn't have any spurs, so I gently nudged his side with my shoe. He went off like a space shuttle. My entire upper section was going back and forth trying to keep up.

What seemed like minutes later, I could see a few bushes in the distance. "Hey Raidramon, there's some bushes in the distance," I said. "So?" he inquired. "Well, don't you think we should stop?" I shot back. No sooner after I said that than he stopped, and I landed on my stomach. Luckily, I landed in the bushes. Nothing. I made sure I wasn't hurt, and thankfully I wasn't. So, I got up. "Raidramon, I know this is my first time, but really." He just lowered his head.

We got it worked out, but it took a while. I found some berries and some apples, put them in the backpack, and we rode back. The ride was much smoother once I figured out a system. I just wrapped my legs around my Digimon, used the spike behind me for back support, and held on.

"Man, I wonder how Kazu, Kenta, and Rika are making out," I wondered to myself.

Rika

We ended up inside the house of these two Digimon. One looked like a short, old man with a long, white beard who wore rags. He carried a staff with a lion's paw at the end. The other was an old, midget woman who wore a robe and carried a robe. I looked them up on my Digivice. "Jijimon, Mega level. Special attack: Claw of Doom. Babamon, Mega level, special attack: Empress Haze. Hey, wow. What do ya know? They're married," I said. "That's right, happily married for forty years, and not so happily for ten after that," Jijimon agreed. Kenta and Kazu laughed nervously.

Babamon finished her sweeping. "Don't listen to this coot, he just likes to hear himself talk. Lock the door already!" she barked. The two of them picked up a nearby piece of wood and talked through it. Jijimon did most of the talking. "That's it, that's it, pick that up. That's good. Put it here, then slide it down and oh that's good." They put it in the holders on the door. Then, they quickly grabbed their sticks and started walking in a circle around each other. "They know what they're doing!" Babamon shouted.

"Don't talk back to me, you evil little shrew! Let me get at cha!" Jijimon shot back. They hit their broom ends against each other. "Everyday the same," Jijimon added. They each put the ends to each other and tried to force the other away. The male Digimon went on, "I love you so much!". Then, the two struck each other. The strikes went back and forth, with both of them swinging and missing. Babamon almost hit Kazu and Kenta, who jumped into Kazu's arms. "Dude, maybe you should lay off my gummy fleas," Kazu grunted, trying to keep him up. Kenta managed to get down.

Jijimon and Babamon chased each other across the room and up the stairs. "Why are they fighting, anyway?" I asked Renamon. "Maybe this is how you'll be when you're old, Rika," she answered. "Heh, very funny, Renamon."

Jijimon chased Babamon down the stairs, shouting, "Come back so I can wallop you already!" Babamon shot back, "Ha! You don't even know what that word means!" They went to sparring again. "I love you so much!" Jijimon called.

I thought about breaking it up, but they had to catch their breaths. Well, that made it a lot easier. "Why are you fighting? Are you having a lovers' spat or something?" I asked. Jijimon put down his broom. "It passes the time," he said. I scratched my head. "Passes the time?"

Babamon explained, "What, like you have something better to do when the wind is blowing? Fighting's the best part of entertainment." "Oh, what do you know from best and worst? Well, worst you know, I've had your cooking," Jijimon shot back. Uh-oh, round 3. "You want another swat? Cause I'll swat you so good." "You couldn't swat the broad side of a board!"

I tried to cut in again, "I don't get it. You're happily married, but you fight each other for entertainment?" "My guess is you've never been married," Jijimon answered.

Babamon quickly swept up a spot. "We don't have to fight anymore," she said. "Why, you're leaving me?" Jijimon asked. "We can fight them, fool." "That might be the best idea you've had in years." "You're right."

They turned to us and got in battle position. "Okay Mr. And Mrs. Interlopers, have we got a proposition for you!" Jijimon started. "You get to keep us from being bored while the wind blows," Babamon added.

I got in a battle pose while Kazu and Kenta looked like they were about to wet their pants. "Can't we all just watch TV?" the two asked together. Meanwhile, Renamon jumped in front of me. "You'll have to fight me first," she boldly stated.

Our two would-be opponents decided to drop the whole thing. "The yellow one's got spunk, maybe we should just eat," Jijimon decided. "Eh, whatever," Babamon agreed. Then, the two hit their brooms together and skipped away, singing, "We're gonna make some food now, we're gonna make some food now."

That got those two birdbrains interested. "Now these are my kind of Digimon!"

Greg

Raidramon and I stopped for a minute so we could get this control thing sorted out. I looked over my partner and noticed hole compartments on his sides. "Hmmm..." I mounted him, and put my hand in the compartment. It fit the two sections of my fingers furthest out. I smiled. "Perfect!" I said, "Raidramon, why didn't you tell me about this before?" "I don't know, nobody's ever ridden me before," he said. Suddenly, his stomach rumbled and he powered back down to Veemon. "Whoa!" I ended up landing on my face. I just rested my head in my palm and tapped the ground with the fingers in my other hand. "Are you OK?" Veemon asked. "You know... you could've just told me you power down when you get hungry," I replied.

Well, we found some more berries and stuff, but we needed protein. I checked my Boy Scout handbook. "Hmmm... let's see... finding nuts and berries. ….Doesn't say anything about the Digital World." I put it back. "I could find a couple of wild Digimon and kill them. We could get an In-Training, each," Veemon offered. "Wait, you Digimon hunt other Digimon for food?" "I don't know. Just trying to be helpful, Greg." I patted him on the head. "Right, I don't think we're that desperate, yet," I said.

Rika

"Well, what are ya waitin' for, the food won't eat itself. Don't get excited, it's nothing special," Jijimon said, bringing us to the table. When he and Babamon finished making dinner, they laid out quite a spread. I was floored. "Holy cow! Nothing special?" I asked in disbelief. "Eh, I told ya we should've made holy cow," Jijimon grumbled.

We dug in. "Yum!" Kenta said as he grabbed a sandwich. Kazu grabbed a longer sub sandwich and added, "Yeah! I'll say!" "Wow, everything looks great," I went on. Renamon bowed her head in appreciation. "Thank you."

Jijimon and Babamon tapped their wine glasses against each other. "Hey!" Then, Jijimon stood up and delivered a toast. "And now, a grape juice toast to the meeting of new friends and now all that other junk." I raised my wine glass. "To new friends," Renamon and I repeated, clinking our glasses. Kazu and Kenta continued to stuff their faces, the animals.

It didn't end there. Babamon continued to make us feel at home. "Later, if you want, you can take a bath," she offered. Jijimon cut in, "They get to take a bath and I don't?" "They won't leave a ring around the tub!" "Hah! You should talk with the leaving of the crumbs in the bed and the couch and just about everywhere else!" "I can't even look at you right now."

I knew that those two lunkheads wouldn't offer to let me go first, so I made it easier on them and gave them first choice. They went in together.

Kazu

Now in Japan, most people don't have central heating. The only way to heat up and relax is to take a bath. Only catch is, we don't use soap or bubbles in ours. We get all cleaned up before we get in the tub because everybody else has to get a turn using the same water! Kinda weird, huh? Anyway, most people go to hot springs to soak in the water. That's what Kenta and I did, and it was awesome! We even started singing in the bath, with an American country song Kenta and I co-wrote.

["Soakin' In the Bath"

Music by Paul Gordon & Deddy Tzur

English Lyrics by Seth Walther

Performed by Kazu Shioda (Brad McDonald) & Kenta Kitagawa (Steven Jay Blum)]

As Jijimon continues to stoke the fire, we look inside the hot spring room and find Kazu and Kenta up to their necks in water, singing.

Kenta:

Getting' all pruny!

Kazu:

Like a raisin in Juney!

Kenta/Kazu:

Soakin' in the bath!

Kazu:

Soakin' (Kenta: Soakin' in the bath!) in the baaaaaaaath!

Kenta:

Actin' loony!

Kazu:

Hopin' you stop singin' sooney!

"Hey!" Kenta shouts. The two get into a water fight. We move for a minute to the living room, where Renamon and Rika are standing in front of the fire, each relaxing with a good cup of after-dinner tea. "Good thing we can't hear them singing in here. I thought my ear drums would bleed," Renamon comments.

Babamon refills her cup. "By the way, the beds are all made so I won't hear any word about leaving before the morning." "Thank you, that'd be great," Rika says.

Babamon goes back to her knitting. "It's so nice to have guests that don't beat each other up, for a change, ya know?" Rika laughs in agreement, smiling. Then, she takes another sip of her tea.

Meanwhile, back in the hot springs... the boys have managed to roll their head towels up into makeshift microphones. They're dreadfully off-key.

Kazu/Kenta:

Bath, bath, bath, bath, bath, baaaaaaaaaath!

"It's been really neat," Kazu starts. "But you lost the beat," Kenta adds. "I can still smell your feet!" "My feet don't smell!"

Kazu/Kenta:

BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATHHHHHHHHHH!

Jijimon has been listening in. We find him clapping his hands and trying to whistle. "Shoot, I never could whistle. Babamon, where's my plastic whistle?" he asks. "Why do you want that?" Babamon calls back. "Listen! Don't talk back to me!"

Rika

As soon as those bozos Kazu and Kenta got out, Renamon and I went in. The water felt so warm, so inviting, so... feminine. I hate that word. I really hate that word.

As I sat in the spring, I thought about my life. I thought about who I was. It's so nice to be alone, just Renamon and me. I thought about my mom. Heh, she always wanted me to get into a dress. It didn't help that she was one of the world's most famous models. She tried so hard to be my friend, had this whole "You and Me Against the World" mentality. So, I tested her limits. She's a complete pushover. I don't think she ever got it, and she still doesn't. She even tried to get me involved in the family business. No way! Nobody, and I mean nobody, gets a cheap shot at Rika Nonaka.

I spent a good part of my life trying to be the best at whatever I could get my hands on. Soccer, baseball, tennis, rock-paper-scissors, anything. I'm what you might call a perfectionist. I just tried harder. Of course, I didn't completely switch mentally. I knew who I was, and I made it work. I wanted to create my own unique beauty. Yeah, I've been called a lot of things, but a girly girl isn't one of them.

I picked the Digimon Official Trading Card Game 2 years ago, and became a master at it. I even won a few tournaments. They were calling me the "Digimon Queen". I got my D-Arc about 6 months later, and everyone wanted to be my partner. I picked Renamon because we had the same mission. We wanted to get stronger, so we did. Up until I met Takato and the others, we killed Digimon just to gain their strength. Now, things are different.

A lot of things have happened since then, and I've grown a lot closer to Renamon. I've grown a lot closer to Jeri as well. I wondered if she'd be OK, but then I snapped out of it. After all, the only person you can trust in the end is you and you alone.

"Weird place," I commented. "Better than outside," Renamon said. We listened as the wind blew. From somewhere else, we could hear our hosts fight. "Don't you yell at me!" Babamon shouted. Renamon shook her head. "Well, maybe..."

Babamon even offered me a knit nightgown, but I passed. I kicked off my shoes and fell back into their bed. "Oh yeah. This is the life, lying on a big comfy bed," I said. Then, I yawned. Renamon just sat there on the rug in our room, determined to keep watch. "Rika?" I woke up. "Hm. Yeah?" "I've been thinking." "Uh-oh."

"Very funny." She laid back on the rug and continued, "When the wind dies, we should look for Calumon." I settled back to sleep and tried to reassure her. "I'm sure he's fine."

Greg

We ended up eating the last of my snacks, but it wasn't enough. So, we got by eating grass and shrubs. "Man, this could use some ketchup," I groaned as I took a bite of a branch. "Greg?" Veemon asked. "Yeah?" "What's ketchup?"

Rika

The two dead weights acted even weirder than usual the next morning. I could hear them arguing. "You can't be thankful for the food, I'm thankful for the food," Kazu started. "Well why can't we be thankful for the same thing?" Kenta asked. "Cause it makes the bath and all the other stuff feel bad." Suddenly, the wind stopped. "Hey, the wind stopped," Kenta noted.

I decided to get up early so I could search for Calumon. We'd have to strike out and find him or the others soon, or else who knows what would happen? I was stranded with these two... losers who didn't have any Digimon with them. They were dead weight. I didn't even know why Takato invited them along in the first place. Anyway, I was standing outside when I saw something blue, gray, and black coming in the distance. I looked it up on my D-Arc, and Raidramon came up. "Raidramon, an Armor Champion Digimon. The Armor Digivolved form of... Veemon using the DigiEgg of Friendship," I sighed. Why was I not surprised?

Greg

I figured I would find the others while I was out, so I used the D-Arc's Radar function to track Rika down. This might give me a chance at some friendship with her. After all, you can't help but make friends with the person who saves your life. I found her in front of these mushroom-like huts.

As we were getting closer to Rika, I slowed my Digimon down, like a Cadillac pulling up to a drive-thru. I just flashed one of those cool, somewhat reserved smiles, the smile that says, "Hey babe, what's up?" Rika got one of these giant sweatdrops on her head, I could see it. "Hi there," I greeted her. She didn't give me a chance. "...Haaaaaah. Let me guess, you're Prince Charming and you're here to rescue me," she assumed. I thought about it, and nodded. "Yeah, pretty much," I answered. I carefully got off Raidramon as he powered down. Rika opened the door and shouted, "Renamon! Kazu! Kenta! LET'S GO!" Just then, this short gnome-type Digimon came out. "Now now wait a minute, don't go just yet now," she said, "We haven't had breakfast yet." Veemon's and my ears perked up. "Breakfast?!" we asked at the same time. She invited us in, and started cooking.

Minutes later, there was a whole feast on the table. It wasn't like any breakfast I'd seen. Steamed rice, this weird sticky substance that looked like beans, broiled fish, and this thing called "rolled omelet". It was weird, but delicious.

We stopped to thank our hosts. "Thank you both for all your hospitality," Rika said. "What, so soon you're leaving?" the bearded Digimon (Jijimon, "jiji" being Japanese for "old man") asked. "But you can't go yet, you just got here," the female gnome (Babamon) added. "Yes, we just got here, but now we must go. Our friends are waiting for us. Isn't that right, Rika?" I asked. Rika just nodded. "Domo arigato," I added. Rika, our Digimon, and I started up the stairs, but then turned back. Kazu and Kenta were frozen.

"Are you coming?" Rika asked. Kazu shook his head. "Actually, no. We've gotta ask Jijimon and Babamon something." "Like what?" "You know, like a question," Kenta added.

Rika shook her head. "Ugh! Fine, I don't have time to play twenty questions with you guys. Catch up with us when you can. Greg! I'm putting you in charge of these two bozos. I can take care of myself."

I gave the Scout salute. "Yes, ma'am!" I said. Veemon gave his salute, too. "Ditto!" Rika rolled her eyes and left with Renamon.

Finally, those two "bozos" dropped to their knees and popped the question. "Jijimon, Babamon, will you be our partners?" I looked up their data. Jijimon and Babamon were Mega-levels! I had to step in.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait just a hot second here!" I said, "Kazu, Kenta, do you realize what level these two are at?" I showed them my Digivice. "We know, dude, they're Mega-level. That's why we gotta get them!" Kazu said. Something was not working.

"No, you don't understand. I've watched the show," I said. "What show?" Babamon asked. "It's a cartoon that's getting more and more real by the second. Now, usually, you start off with a Rookie. He or she stays with you for the entire season, possibly life. Then, it Digivolves to Champion, most of the time Ultimate, and if you're Davis, Mega."

"Who's this Davis kid, and why does a Mega-level he get?" Jijimon griped.

Kazu and Kenta just started doing their own thing, pretending to Digi-Modify. "Digi-Modify!" "Digi-Modify!"

Jijimon and Babamon looked to each other. "This is getting better and better. With these kids, we could Digivolve," Jijimon said.

"Is there a level after Mega?" I asked Veemon. He shrugged. "I don't think so."

Kenta tried to close the sale. "So what do ya say, guys? Are we Digimon and Digimon Tamers or what?" "Ooh, Digi-Modify," Jijimon muttered excitedly, doing the action. Suddenly, that gave Kazu an idea. "If I could digivolve you know what I'd be?" he asked. He spent some time thinking about it. "What? Are you gonna tell us or should we start with the guessing?" Jijimon quipped.

All of a sudden, Kazu turned around, put on a cape, and turned his visor backwards. "I'm BlackWarKazumon!" he announced.

I decided to go along with it. "Ooh, do you see that, Veemon? Kazu just Digivolved. Let me look him up." I pulled out my Digivice and pretended to look at it. "Hmmm... 'BlackWarKazumon, Dope level. Special attack: Fartknocker.'" "I wonder what that attack does," Veemon added.

Kenta was next. "Digivolve me now!" So, Babamon "swiped" a card. "Digi-Modify!" "Alright, Kenta digivolve to..." Kenta paused to imagine what he'd look like, then he put on red gloves and wrapped some cloth around his mouth and forehead. "MegaMightyKentamon!"

Again, I went along with the gag. "Well I'll be! There's another one. 'MegaMightyKentamon, level off the chain! His special attack is... 'This sucks, Uh-huh-huh.''" "Never heard of that attack before," Veemon said.

The two "Digimon" growled at each other. "Okay, you both make a lot of noise, but can ya fight?" Jijimon wondered. "Yeah, go to it, MegaMightyKentamon," Babamon cheered. "Maga!" "Maga!" Kazu and Kenta backed up and started to punch and hit the air. They got closer and really started fighting.

Then, the two "Tamers" tossed the "Digimon" their sticks, and they really went at it. "Hold everything!" I shouted, as I thrust my hand forward. They stopped. "Babamon, Jijimon, I challenge you two to a Digimon battle. Two on one!" "OK, bring it on!" Babamon agreed. "Prepare your Digimon, I'll see you in five minutes," I said.

I took Veemon to another room and we talked "strategics". "Greg, what are you thinking!? I can't fight them," Veemon grumbled. "Sure, you can. If Beavis and Butt-Head want to pretend like they're Digimon, we'll give them the battle of their lives. Besides, I need the Digi-Modify practice." "Hmmm... OK, but I'm gonna go easy on them. I mean, they're just humans." "Would you rather fight the two Mega-levels?" "No." "Good."

Five minutes later, the battle began. Our game plan was simple: jab and tackle them, then run around until they got tired. "Go for it!" the two old Digimon cheered. Kazu and Kenta- er, BlackWarKazumon and MegaMightyKentamon- started charging towards Veemon. "Playtime's over, boys," I said coolly. I pulled out my D-Arc and drew a card. I spun the card around and dropped it. "Uh huh huh..." I nervously laughed as I picked it up. I decided to try a much simpler approach and just scanned the card, calling out, "Digi-Modify! Hyperspeed Activate!"

With that, Veemon sped up and started running circles around the two. Every now and then, he'd stop and shout, "U can't touch this!" At one point, I called out, "Break it down!" While I went on with the "Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh oh-oh", Kenta used his special attack. He swept with the broom quickly to spread dust. Still, Veemon managed to grab a hammer and raise it, chanting, "And stop! Hammer time!"

Jijimon and Babamon tried to Digi-Modify their Digimon. Babamon was first. "Digi-Modify! Step on his neck!" Then, it was Jijimon. "Digi-Modify. BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!" Of course, they did nothing. "Step aside, and watch how an expert does it!" I called as I took out another card and scanned it. I didn't drop it this time. "Digi-Modify! Targeting Activate!" Veemon's eyes shined for a second and he became more accurate with his hammer attack. Luckily, nobody did any real damage.

I'll admit, it was starting to get fun until Little Miss Killjoy walked in with Renamon. Then, everything stopped, while Kenta and Kazu ran to the sides of their "partners". "What's going on in here?" Renamon demanded to know.

I pointed to the two "Digimon", asking, "You wanted me to take care of Dumb and Dumber, right?" "Hey!" Kazu shot back.

Rika facepalmed. "You don't mean-" I nodded. "I was letting them practice with Veemon." "That's right, you're lookin' at MegaMightyKentamon's new Tamer," Babamon added.

The two took off their costumes while they explained. Kazu went first. "Well there was a little mix up. We were supposed to be the Tamers." "Yeah, but we ended up being the Digimon," Kenta chimed in.

Rika was not having it. "Have you gone totally cuckoo? What about getting home?!" "Oh yeah."

She then turned to me. "As for you, Scarecrow, why don't you go get yourself a brain? Siccing Veemon on two humans." Veemon nervously chuckled and dropped his hammer.

Naturally, I had to go on the defense. "Aww come on, Rika. Don't do me like that. I needed the practice." She wasn't having it. "Well, go practice on somebody else. Now come on, let's get outta here." With that, she, her partner, and Kazu and Kenta started to leave.

However, our hosts wouldn't have it. "Wait! You can't just run off with our partners!" Babamon shouted. Jijimon added, "And anyone who tries to stop our fun gets a noggin knockin'." They ran over with their brooms, but Renamon caught them and moved them back. The two broke the brooms free. Renamon jumped onto the stairs, and Jijimon and Babamon followed. The fox-like Digimon then jumped up and our hosts ended up tumbling down the stairs.

"Thanks again," I called down the stairs. I then turned to Veemon. "Come on, buddy. We better get going." "Uh huh!"

We caught up with the four. "So, you don't want us to take you back?" I asked Rika, who was gathering some sort of cloth. "Nope. I don't know about you, but the four of us are headed back to Japan. You go ahead and do what you want." "But what do I tell Henry?" "He's probably thinking the same thing, too. Hmmm... Has Veemon reached Champion yet?"

"No," Veemon answered. Rika dug through her deck and threw me a card. "Use this. It's a Digivolution card. Go back to Henry when you've gotten stronger. He'll understand." I nodded. "Right." I put the card away, Armor Digivolved Veemon to Raidramon, and left. The last I could see of the two gnome-like Digimon were them chasing Kazu and Kenta.