Darkest Kiss

Chapter Four

I woke up with a splitting head ache. It pulsed rapidly behind my shut tightly lids and even the faint light creeping out from under the door was hurting my eyes. I groaned and shoved a pillow over my head, trying to block the light. My skull felt like it was splitting open and it was making sure to do it as slowly as possible. The light seemed to seep out from under my pillow. I growled again and rolled on to my stomach. My arms protested and shook violently but still complied. I tried to remember why I felt so weak but the headache seemed to press a heavy fog against my mind.

I rolled back to my back and glared at the ceiling. I pinched the bridge of my nose and sighed in annoyance (and in pain); because I knew I wasn't going to be getting back to sleep.

Suddenly there was water being shoved into my hand and a small round pill. Almost without thought I popped the pill and chugged a decent amount of water. I heard the light laughter across the room and it all came rushing back to me. I was with Robin and the fight last night…

I drank the rest of the water and rolled to sit up. I was surprised at how easily I could see in the dark. Since I had started taking the medicine my eyes were becoming less efficient in the darkness and my sleeping pattern had started to move back to a normal schedule. In the corner next to Robin's bed someone was sitting on a chair.

I could have recognized him by the way he was snoring. The soft green hair, and hunched frame was enough to alert me to who it was. I felt myself sigh in relief.

"He barged in here a few hours ago," Robin said softly. She was by my side, and I wondered how the dark woman could move so quietly to escape my notice. Even when I was more human like, my senses have always been sharper. She sat lightly on the end of my bed and I could practically feel her eyes boring into me searching for something.

"I thought he was out with Brook?" I whispered quietly back. Judging by her tone she was trying to figure something out, and I wasn't one to hide something from Robin. The older woman was like my sister, and if she wanted to know something it was simply for my benefit or welfare so she could help me.

She nodded once, her gaze not dropping from mine.

"Brook is following an Other. He seems to be the only one that can do so without detection," she told me.

It took me a second to process the information. I felt myself shake slightly in fear for my friend. I tried to calm myself but I knew without a doubt that there was something much more to this. This was tied directly to me.

"Who is it?"

I had whispered it without even thinking. I wanted to know who it was and why it is such a big deal, why I can feel it down in the pit of my stomach.

"WHO is it?" I said a bit louder when Robin still hadn't answered me.

"It's your sister," Zoro said gruffly from his corner. His deep voice cut through the darkness like one of his blades.

A thousand thoughts ran through my mind. Why her? What had happened that she got involved with that? Who had caught her? My stomach sank even lower with the realization that I might have been the one to cash in my sister to the government. I would have thrown up but my stomach was empty from the night before. The water I had drunk threatened to climb but I swallowed it down quickly. I had forgotten my friends to protect them but not my sister? What the hell was wrong with me? Where were my priorities?

"Arlong caught her after he found out that we managed to get you back," Robin said quietly.

There was that name again, and instead of the information calming me down that I hadn't been the one to turn my sister in I felt my blood starting to boil. Why was it that Arlong had come back into my life? What made him come into the picture? I had so many questions but I wasn't even sure where to begin.

"Where is Brook now?" I asked settling on one after a moment.

My voice shook with anger but I was surprised at how collected I sounded.

"Out," Zoro barked in a bored tone.

He seemed to shift in his seat and he was studying me as discreetly as he could with his chin still resting on his chest. I could see him clearly in the darkness and it wasn't discreet at all. His eye was trained and watching me with a weariness I hadn't seen in a long time and his arms were crossed, waiting. It was like he was waiting for me to blow up and I didn't feel like holding back anymore. I didn't feel like playing nice and trying to get their trust back. This wasn't about what I wanted them to think anymore. If I sat there and tried to pretend I was okay after all of this then I was just hiding behind a mask. I had no clue who I really was anymore, but I'd be damned if I didn't try to find out. And that meant just following my instincts.

"OUT? That's all you can say you big brute?" I hissed.

"You sound like Sanji. Is that the best insult you can come up with?"

For a moment I couldn't respond. I was on my feet shaking and standing over him and I was sure I had murder in my eyes. I couldn't come up with a response but I had to get him to see why I had to know.

"It's my sister! I want to help!"

"You can't," he said curtly glaring up at me.

"And why not?"

"Zoro," Robin said stiffly interrupting any response I might have gotten. He sighed and shifted slightly avoiding her gaze. I glanced between the two of them and for some unexplainable reason I felt hurt. Why was it that Zoro listened to her?

"Goth woman," he said evenly his gaze not leaving mine as he addressed Robin.

It seemed like an unspoken agreement was made or some type of understanding was reached before Robin sighed.

"I'm going to get breakfast. I'm sure you two would like some alone time," she started. She strode to the door and paused looking over her shoulder at me.

"Why would we want alone time?" I growled but I was ignored as Robin snapped the door shut behind her with a gentle click.

Zoro shrugged and suddenly he looked very uncomfortable. He shifted in his seat to sit up straighter and crossed his ankle over his knee. His hands shot nervously into his hair before crossing over his chest again.

"Look I know you don't trust me-"

"Damn straight I don't," he growled interrupting my attempt to start a conversation.

"Don't interrupt," I hissed hitting him upside the head. I was surprised at how violent I was becoming but it didn't feel like I was forcing this. It felt like an old habit that was starting to surface again. Zoro even smirked up at me like he remembered this. I had to close my eyes to restrain from hitting him again.

"Look I know-"

"Do you?" he asked interrupting me again. I glared at him. Maybe I didn't know but I sure as hell wasn't going to tell him any of that. My hand itched to raise and hit him again. I took a deep breath.

"Zoro… please."

My legs felt weak and I hated how dumb I sounded. I had to explain to him. I had to help Nojiko. He didn't say anything, just stared long and hard at me.

"Why did you barge in here earlier?" I asked once the silence seemed to consume us. I had to corner him in an awkward situation to get my way. I feel like I had done this several times before. Although all my feelings with Zoro seemed familiar I couldn't seem to grasp a memory between us that was solid, just a few hazy memories with him in the background with my other friends.

He shifted obviously uncomfortable.

"You weren't waiting with Luffy and the others," he said easily. He shrugged as if it was nothing but his cheeks started to turn pink ever so slightly.

"I was with Robin," I offered.

"I didn't know if you really remembered her or not."

"So you thought I'd panic?"

He didn't say anything just sort of nodded. His head dipped down slowly and deliberately but I couldn't be sure if it was an actual nod of acknowledgement or if he was starting to drift off to sleep.

"And you didn't get lost finding this room?" I snorted. His eye brow quirked and his smirk reappeared as his gaze shot up to meet mine.

"No. This is base," he said as if that explained everything.

It didn't really do much. I knew this was the rebel base but I hadn't really thought that Luffy and the others would be willing to live here or visit here much. That might have been because I was stuck with the bunker that felt so much like home with them for such a long time.

"And after you saw I was fine?" I pressed.

Zoro hated admitting that he emotions for people. If I could just get him embarrassed enough he would back down, and maybe I could drill him about my sister and get some answers out of him.

"I know what you are trying to do Nami," he growled. "It stopped working a while ago… sheesh. I guess being a witch is just ingrained into you," he mumbled the last part to himself.

I smacked him upside the head again.

"I should charge you for that," I growled.

"Put it on my tab," he replied cheekily.

His smile seemed to grow wider and I was starting to greatly dislike the bubble of anticipation that seemed to grow in my stomach with it. I scoffed and sat down roughly on the bed beside him, careful to keep my gaze locked at the opposing wall.

There was a loud bang in the hallway that seemed to ring out, followed by Luffy's loud laughter.

"We should probably go check on that…" I mumbled. Knowing Luffy who knew what kind of mischief he was causing. Even with allies it was best to keep an eye on him.

"Yup," Zoro agreed not moving.

Shouting was joined with our captain's laughter, and a couple of disgruntled curses.

I closed my eyes and leaned back against the wall. My head fell with an audible thump, and I pinched the bridge of my nose again as I sighed. I squeezed my eyes shut as another bang and loud laughter filled the air.

"What the hell is he doing?"

"Eating breakfast," Zoro answered.

Only Luffy could cause this much racket and chaos during a single meal. I growled and swung my legs over the bed to stand. I was just about to leave when a warm hand wrapped around my wrist. I whirled to face Zoro and I was honestly surprised when his gaze was locked on the floor.

"Do you remember anything?" he asked bluntly. His cheeks seemed to glow slightly brighter.

I was tempted to say of course. He had been there when I was starting to get back memories, but I knew he was asking something else. The way his cheeks were tinted pink I had a feeling it had to do with just that, feelings. I could just stand there dumbly as I tried to think of an answer. My mouth was slightly agape and I must've looked dazed because Zoro sighed and dropped my hand.

"I mean with Arlong," he said quickly. I knew it was an excuse to get out of whatever he had just tried to bring up. I numbly shook my head no.

"I don't want to remember that," I said quietly. "I have a feeling it was just like my past… and I don't want to live in my past. I want to get better and be with you guys."

I could feel my face burning with embarrassment but I refused to turn away from him. If anything Zoro was truly my friend even if he didn't handle emotions really well, I didn't either. So if we both suffered it wasn't nearly as bad. I grinned weakly at him.

"Just keep leaving it to us," he said standing and stretching dramatically. As he yawned his hands wrapped around my back and pulled me to his chest.

I wanted to cry again. A memory came back and I knew it was back from when I was being controlled as an Other and I knew Zoro had said something similar to me. I could feel it there and I wanted to grasp it and pull it up to inspect but just like that it was gone again and I was filled with a sense of loss that I so desperately wanted to go away. I wanted to be complete again; I want to be part of my friends. And Zoro was offering me just that. A memory from when they first rescued me from Arlong Park came back, and I strangled a sob. I remembered being terrified for them, and not being able to believe that they could save me… well that was then and this was now. If anyone could take care of it they could, but I wasn't about to let them do all the work this time. I was stronger now too. Still the comfort of Zoro's strong arms was something I felt like I desperately craved. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held him closer. He smelled a lot like sweat, smoke (not the cigarettes kind but the fire kind), and something that was almost metallic.

I don't know how long we stayed like that. It could have been hours, it could have been a couple of minutes, but all too soon the reality of the situation we were in came crashing in around us.

There was almost a deafening boom as the door flew open. Out of instinct I jumped but Zoro seemed to squeeze me tighter to his chest for a moment before he sighed and let me go. Standing in the door way Sanji was panting and doubled over. His hand shook as he pointed at Zoro with a glare that would have killed anyone else.

"How dare you sneak around to get alone time with Nami?! You shitty ass caveman!" he hissed.

"Sorry Nami. He kept asking if you were awake and if you were hungry," Robin said leaning around from behind the angry cook and giving me an apologetic smile.

"It's umm okay. We were just about to get breakfast," I offered quickly looking back at Zoro. He was glaring at Sanji and I was pretty sure he didn't even hear me give him a perfectly good excuse to get out of this situation.

"I was worried about her," he said addressing the cook.

I think I gasped, or Robin did. Sanji just stood there stupidly, his mouth slightly agape. He recovered quickly though and his jaw snapped shut with an audible thud.

"I've been in a sick bed worried sick about our angel for two days you worthless dickhead."

"At least I didn't see an Other and run straight into her arms, twirling around like a ballerina," Zoro hissed.

"What did you just say?"

"I'll speak slower. You. Ballerina," Zoro barked. His hands shot to his swords and rested there. His jaw was clenched tightly. I swear Sanji's head was about to blow up.

"I'll feed you in a minute my sweet angel," Sanji said striding into the room and walking around me. I've never in my entire life been blown off by Sanji for a fight with Zoro, but it wasn't like I had asked for food yet and he was just addressing me like the gentleman he was before he put Zoro in his place.

"You let her go once-"

"She told me she would be back by sunset-"

"Don't make excuses. I'll never forgive you-"

"And I'll never forgive myself. Now stop being a stupid shit and feed her. She told you she was about to get breakfast, and I'm sure she hasn't eaten since the day before yesterday," Zoro snapped.

I swear my mouth dropped to the point where it was hanging on the floor. Sanji seemed phased by Zoro too. They stared at each other for a second before Sanji turned to me smiling tightly.

"Come on Nami my sweet," he said offering his arm for me to take. I stared at it for a second wondering if a pair of teeth would sprout out and bite me.

"You should still be resting Sanji," Robin said stepping around him to offer her arm to me. I gladly accepted it.

"Don't strain yourself Sanji," I said quietly patting his arm lightly and smiling. He smiled sweetly.

"Of course Nami, but you're more important than –"

"Alright Lover boy we get that you're a queer. Let her go get some breakfast," Zoro growled quickly striding out the door with a flap of his arm in dismissal.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" Sanji shouted after him storming out the door to catch up. I could barely hear Zoro's faint reply of 'sleep'. I couldn't hold in the smile that seemed to spread across my face.

"Sanji seems better," I noted out loud. Robin chuckled and led me out the door.

I had never actually been inside a school before. I wouldn't know how to recognize one on the inside. But when we walked past dozens of doors with abandoned desks and half-filled chalk boards I knew where we were. I guess the school was used as a base for the rebels. We walked down a row of lockers before Robin held me up for a second.

"I know this is silly but we're all assigned lockers to use to stash personal belongings," Robin started.

She pointed one near the corner of the hall. They all looked the same; they all had the same peeling red paint, and all looked ready to fall off their hinges. I wasn't sure about the security of any items that could be stashed away. I was about to ask why Robin was pointing at this locker when a dull memory surfaced. This was already my locker. I had stashed away some things thinking that it would be a short trip and I'd be right back. Excitement lunged at me as I quickly ran to the locker and turned the dial impatiently 11 11 11. Seemed easy enough to remember which is probably why I remembered it.

The door stuck fast as I pulled impatiently at it but gave way with another swift tug. Three letters fell to the floor as I did so and I knew that I hadn't been the one to put them in there. They obviously weren't secured enough… but that isn't what caught my attention.

In the back of the locker on a single hook hung a plain necklace. It wasn't lavish or anything I had expected when I saw the glint of gold, it had a single small Ruby clasped to a thin gold chain. I timidly reached out to it sort of expecting a flood of memories when I touched it. I held my hand out for a moment debating on if I should touch it before I sighed and quickly pulled it off the hook. I was greatly disappointed when nothing came back to me. I pocketed the necklace, making a mental note to study it later, and rummaged around the small locker space. I had several maps tucked neatly away in one corner. Some I had obviously not finished yet and a few others had notes scrawled neatly along the side. There was a random black hat on the bottom taking up a lot of room and when I moved it there was a pile of money folded neatly underneath it with the words 'Luffy's food budget' scrawled across the top. I chuckled as I pocketed that and made a mental note to give it to Sanji later for food… but then remembered that food wasn't really paid for at the moment and that money was practically useless.

I think half the reason I felt so vulnerable was that I couldn't hide behind money and tangerines in a world that had no use for such superficial things. I had no clue how my trees were doing but I couldn't exactly check on them when we were so far from the ocean. I couldn't excuse myself from an awkward situation and blame the need to check on my trees. No, I was left out in the open, bare and exposed. To be honest it scared me. Did my friend's hate the person they were seeing now? The scared little girl without her memory of them who was running around doing nothing but being a burden, did they hate her? I shivered and noticed that Robin was waiting patiently for me to look through my things.

There was a small black bag shoved to the side and it seemed to carry a small amount of toiletries and a spare change of clothes. I grabbed it, slung it over my shoulder, bent down and scooped up the scattered letters, then turned my attention back to Robin.

"I remembered the code to get in…" I said lamely as I looked at her expectant gaze. Her brows furrowed for a moment before she shrugged.

"It was worth a try. When you were still an Other you had a few relapses when I was around," she told me.

That was why she had been absent since I had been 'awakened'. It didn't explain what sort of relapse I had experienced.

"Relapses?" I questioned timidly when it became clear that she wasn't going to continue explaining unless prompted.

"You seemed to remember me when you were under Arlong's control. We couldn't have that when you were so close to danger."

I strained to remember remembering Robin but nothing came to me. I don't remember a single thing from when I was an actual Other. Just things right before and a few while memories of me being tortured… that was all I had to go off. I felt guilty all of a sudden because I knew I had blocked out all of my friends to protect them and things with Robin seemed to all be there. I remembered nearly everything about her without a single hitch. It was like it flowed back to me more naturally than anything else had so far.

"Chopper has a theory that it is because I am one of your few female friends and the only other girl on the crew."

It hit me then. I had reached out to Robin because I had been scared of guys. I knew it was stupid to be worried about my friend's touches, hell I had even been freaked out when Luffy gave me a hug and the thought of giving Usopp a hug had sent me into a cold sweat. I had reversed back to the Nami before the Straw Hats. I was the Nami that didn't know how to trust and was terrified for the people who had come into my life and so unselfishly gave me everything without asking for anything in return.

"Oh," was all I managed to say back as we rounded another corner.

"Nami," Robin said calmly as we got closer to the sounds of Luffy's loud laughter. "I'm truly sorry we took so long in getting you back."

"All that matters is that you guys did," I told her with a smile.

I would be okay. I wasn't okay now. I still had no clue what the hell happened to me and I still was struggling to remember them but I know I love them. I know they are my family and that I trust them. They would help me get through this.

With that being the last word between us, Robin pushed open the door.

Several people were eating in corners to help them defend their food from Luffy's long reach. In the center of the room Luffy was at the main table stuffing as much food as he could down his throat. Usopp was beside him laughing with Chopper about something. Franky was chugging cola like it was no one's business, and I noticed with great glee that Brook was there as well. I rushed up to the group tugging Robin with me and sat down eagerly next to Luffy.

"Nami!" he greeted with a giant smile. A piece of ham stuck out of his lips.

"Swallow your food first before you greet people," I growled smacking him lightly upside the head. His grin seemed to triple in size.

"You're not scary yet," he told me.

"Yo ho ho. Can I see your p-"

"Is that how you greet someone you pervert?!" I yelled interrupting Brook and kicking him hard upside the head.

"Pervert?" Franky asked looking at me.

Luffy's laughter seemed to dance around me and suddenly I was smiling and laughing too. This was all so familiar. I had missed it so much. Robin pushed a plate of food to me as she sat down between Brook and Franky across from me. I smiled at her gratefully and tucked in. I really wanted to hound Brook to hell and back with questions of my sister but in front of all the strangers that surrounded us it didn't feel like the place.

Before I even had a chance to finish my breakfast, Brook was stretching and bidding everyone his goodbyes and that he would be back hopefully for dinner to eat because he would be starving- although he was already bones. I yelled after him but I was ignored as he quickly sprinted away.

I rubbed my eyes tiredly.

"He'll be okay," Chopper told me.

As if that was what I was worried about, I snorted to myself. No I had faith in Brook. Zombies were weak and if he was just trailing one Other than he would be fine. What I wanted to know was everything from how the hell Arlong was involved in this and how he got my sister. It seemed to be a touchy subject and for some reason it felt like I couldn't ask flat-out what was going on. Again it might have been the strangers that crowded the cafeteria but I felt odd.

It was a few more minutes before I realized why.

Everyone was staring at me. It wasn't like the discreet stare for a split second and look away stare but hardcore stare downs in every direction. I shifted in my seat uncomfortably and grabbed my arm self-consciously.

"Maybe bringing her back to headquarters was a bad idea…" Usopp said out loud for us to hear as he glanced nervously over his shoulder.

"She does still have a few alarming features," Robin agreed.

"She's fine," Chopper snapped and stabbed a piece of his food with a little more force than necessary. I felt a flash of irritation for being talked about like I wasn't here but I knew that they have grown used to addressing me like this. Half the time I had barely been able to focus on them long enough to know I was in the conversation. I think the vast improvement was really only noticed by Chopper and Zoro.

"Nami."

Luffy was addressing me in what seemed like a stern voice. I turned my attention back to my captain. He had one had covering his nose as he continued to shovel food down his throat like a grave-digger. The rate and pace of it was ridiculous as always and as I looked down I noticed that most of breakfast was missing. I scoffed and hurriedly wolfed down the rest of my food before Luffy's stretchy hands could find it.

"Nami," Luffy said again.

"What?"

I rolled my eyes expecting him to ask if he could lick the crumbs off my plate.

"You really stink. You need a bath," he told me.

"That's rude!" I hissed and hit him hard upside the head.

"OW!" he hissed rubbing his head. He had fallen back slightly in his chair but he was still managing to eat the food that was in front of him. "How's that rude Nami? You do stink… when's the last time you had a ba-"

I punched him upside the head again and roughly stood up from my seat. I was slightly embarrassed since my captain has no sense of volume control and I really hadn't had the chance to bathe in a while. I did stink. I could smell myself but the allure of food was more prominent than the need to clean up some. Still the color that rose to my cheeks didn't go unnoticed as Robin chuckled.

"I'll show you the bath house once you finish eating," she told me. I nodded and sat back down. Carefully I leaned over Luffy to grab a choice looking piece of meat.

"Here Nami," Chopper said shoving a bowl of fruit into my arms before I could take a bite. I raised my eye brow but shrugged it off. I popped a few grapes into my mouth and sighed with content. It felt good to eat with my friends.

A/N: Well here's another chapter. I was pretty worried about the Sanji/Zoro interactions... I can never quiet get it right, but I think I wrote a passable part for this chapter. I was going to wait a bit before posting but then I realized I won't have time to at all for the next week or the week after that. I mean I could manage to squeeze in time for it but... yeah... So here's your chapter. Updated because future me is feeling lazy. Oh and if you guys don't get an update on Halloween someone has the right to leave me a very hatefilled message. :p. Until next time~