It had been two days since Lelouch's almost depressing visit. Suzaku hadn't told a soul about him, despite the threats he'd made, and refused to talk to anyone else. They kept him fed and clean and 'entertained' by the 24-hour news and otherwise ignored him. There were no random Japanese guards stopping by to call him a traitor, no one mocking the fall of Britannia's Shinigami, not even another visit from Kaguya – although Suzaku saw her on the news sometimes. She seemed busy.

When Kallen walked in, Suzaku wanted to ignore her like he ignored the guards who brought him meals, but there was a look in her eyes…

"What are you to him?" She looked almost lost, confused… Suzaku had seen that expression on grieving people. "Why are you so important to him?"

Suzaku considered not saying anything, then shrugged. "We were friends. More than that even at one point." He took in her shocked expression and laughed. "Not like that. Almost a family…" He'd killed his father, at least in part, for Lelouch. Lelouch had vowed revenge against his own father, at least in part, for Suzaku. "He miscalculated." Suzaku snorted. "Again. And now he's stuck with me. Don't fool yourself Kallen, the reason I'm not dead isn't because Zero is keeping me alive, but because he can't kill me. He can imprison me or let me go, but that's it."

"I don't…" Kallen leaned forward, against the glass, barely breathing out the next word. "Geass?"

"Bingo." Suzaku laughed again, this time bitterly. "The Power of Kings." From Kallen's expression, she'd heard that phrase before. "I can't die Kallen. I can't let myself be killed or even kill myself." He couldn't stop laughing. "I tried, you know… after I brought him to Pendragon… It was a moment of weakness, but when I woke up the blade was imbedded in the wall and two hours had passed." It was so funny, tears were rolling down his cheeks. "He trapped me long before that damned chess match, in this body, in this life. And, you know what? It made me a better fighter. A better killer. Outmatched and outgunned and I still come out alive because of him!" Suzaku's voice cracked and he wondered when exactly he'd started crying.

It wasn't fair! His hard-won control had been the only thing he'd taken pride in since becoming the Knight of Seven. He'd never broken down, not even in private (that one moment on his bed, admiring his new dagger aside) and had never shown weakness to the other knights or nobles. Not until Lelouch came and scolded him, telling him that he didn't understand love and suddenly, Suzaku the crybaby was back. And in front of Kallen, whose lip was curling with disgust…

"You are weak," She snapped. "Needing to be protected from your own suicidal tendencies by your enemy? He protected you the moment he knew who you were, you know. And have you ever done anything for him? You betrayed him and abandoned him…"

"So did you." Suzaku wasn't normally this cruel, but it was worth it to hear Kallen's sharp intake of breath cutting off her words. "And yet you're still by his side. How does that feel?"

Kallen glared. "I'm not at his side right now, am I?"

Oh. That's why she… "Where is he?" Kallen scoffed and Suzaku had to admit she had a point – he wouldn't tell him either. "Why did he leave you behind?"

"He took Kinoshita's group and the new boy and some guy." Kallen huffed as if they hadn't been accusing each other of treason moments before. "I'm the Zero squad leader, I should be with him, not some new people and random knights."

Suzaku laughed. "Knights… he always did know how to communicate disdain without actually saying anything outright."

Kallen shrugged. "Can you blame him?"

"Not for that…" Suzaku trailed off. "Why didn't you just follow him?"

Of all possible reactions, Suzaku had not expected the blush. "I… I'm not some needy clingy follower," Kallen snapped.

"No…" Suzaku said carefully. "You're the captain of Zero's personal squad. No one's saying that you're not entitled to protect him."

"Good!" Kallen nodded viciously. "Because I am. And I will. If he lets me…"

Suzaku could relate to that. "That's always been a problem with him. Letting himself be protected, letting himself trust." He trusted Suzaku with Nunnally…

"I know," Kallen admitted. "He kept it from me… he's still keeping so much from Ougi and Toudou and the others…"

"Kallen." Suzaku walked towards the glass, keeping his hands visible and friendly. "I know you're loyal to him. But that doesn't mean unquestioning obedience. There has to be a reason he left you behind this time, maybe a reason he doesn't want you to know. He… he doesn't always make the right decisions, you know that. He needs someone to rein him in sometimes. And you're close to him… you could be that person."

Kallen shook her head. "You don't understand. It's not… I followed him after Narita, after Shirley's father…" She swallowed. "I followed him after the tanker exploded, I followed him after Kamine island, and I… I earned his trust. And then I lost it because you… because I couldn't adapt to the thought of him being a brat prince. I don't know why you two fell out. I don't know your past, and I don't know why you're willing to fight someone you lo-liked. But I can't do that. I can't let him go just because I learned something new about him. And I can't second guess him because if I'm wrong, it's like we're back there and I let him get taken again."

"He caused the genocide at the SAZ," Suzaku said and Kallen's eyes widened. "Euphy was… Euphy was a peaceful girl above all else. If she had thought the situation in Area 11 was fine, she wouldn't have done anything. She wanted the SAZ in good faith. And then she met with Le-Zero. And when she came out she was armed and she ordered the slaughter of innocent people." Suzaku pressed against the glass, as if proximity would make him more believable. "She would never have done that on her own, Kallen. You know what that means…"

"N-no… he wouldn't have…"

Suzaku felt the familiar cold rage. "He did. And it nearly worked – he managed to rally the Japanese people, mustered up enough forces to overthrow the military before the reinforcements could come and then… it would have been eight years ago all over again. Only Zero would have had the same stance as my father – that they would defend Japan to the last man standing. And he would have used the chaos to further his own goals."

"He…" It was believable. Credible. Lelouch wouldn't have hesitated to kill and demonize one person to achieve his ends. He talked so glibly about protecting his subordinates and his people, but anyone on the other side was fair game as far as he was concerned. And he hated the royal family, he probably hated Euphemia as well… "So what? Is that so much worse then what you've done? What I've done?"

Suzaku couldn't believe it. "Yes! Using Euphy like that, arranging for the slaughter of innocents…"

"We ran to the ghetto to get away from the military," Kallen interrupted. "We knew we were putting civilians at risk." She glared at him. "You target civilian facilities when you invade to demoralize and terrify the population." She shook her head. "He… he did what he had to do. And I'm sorry if someone you cared about was killed, but everyone you've killed had friends and lovers and family too."

"It's not the same," Suzaku insisted. "Lelouch… he cheats and lies and…"

Kallen laughed and it sounded a little broken. "And you've been completely honest and forthright with your motivations. And I've never lied or used dirty tactics. God, Suzaku, we're barely adults and we've probably killed more people than we've met."

"I know," Suzaku said. "I know that I don't deserve forgiveness for what I've done. But neither does he and you're just so quick to give it to him. To laud him for his sins."

"Hate the sin," Kallen said, with an ironic twist to her mouth that looked highly unflattering. "Love the sinner. Suzaku, do you really hate Lelouch? Or do you just hate what he's done?"

Suzaku couldn't answer that.

OoO-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-OoO

That night, Zero came to visit him.

"We're going to Ashford in the morning."

Before Suzaku could answer, Zero turned on his heel and marched out.

OoO-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-OoO

It wasn't just them. Rolo, and Kallen were coming too. Suzaku considered trying to escape, then decided it would be a better idea to try when they landed. For one thing, it would be a bad idea to jump out of the transport over the ocean. For another, he was chained to the wall by both wrists and ankles. Not insurmountable, but certainly not an ideal escape opportunity.

Lelouch, completely unselfconsciously, changed from his Zero costume to his Ashford uniform. Kallen looked away the whole time, flushed and clearly irritated. Rolo placed the Zero mask reverently in its carrying case, but let Lelouch fold his own clothes (anally, Suzaku thought).

"My father's dead," Lelouch said blandly. Suzaku managed not to react. "Or imprisoned eternally in purgatory, whatever." Lelouch shrugged. "Odysseus will take the throne in a month or so with Schneizel's support and negotiate a treaty with the U.F.N. that will involve the gradual liberation of all Areas who want to be liberated." He steepled his fingers. "China is willing to allow India to become its own country, the Geass Order is no more, and Nunnally is safe." Lelouch smirked. "I win, Suzaku. Even if you escape, there's nowhere to run to. Cornelia might have been a threat at one point, but we have her under guard and the rest of my siblings will follow Odysseus and Schneizel, and they follow me. Kaguya and Tianzi rule the rest of the world and I control their armies. You are neither needed nor a threat."

"I could kill you right now." Suzaku was never afraid to point out the obvious.

Lelouch didn't flinch. "Wouldn't matter. I've achieved everything I needed to achieve. Nunnally's peaceful world is a reality and Japan is free. I've kept my promises." Have you kept any of yours?

Kallen grabbed her gun as Suzaku shifted. "At what cost?"

"Thousands of lives," Lelouch answered blandly. "Millions, even. For the freedom of billions, though, and for the future. Are you going to tell me it's not worth the cost?"

"Nothing could be worth–" Suzaku cut himself off. Lelouch leaned forward.

"If you'd asked her… if you'd offered her this world in return for her sacrifice, Suzaku. What would she have said?"

"Shut up," Suzaku snarled. "You just… don't talk about her."

Lelouch glared back, eyes cold and resentful. "She was my sister. I'll talk about her if I wish."

"You killed her."

"So did you!" Lelouch snapped. "Do you really think she would have been there if it hadn't been for you? Do you think that things would have even gotten that far if it hadn't been for you and the Lancelot? Every time you tried to do what you thought was right, every time you stood against me, you set up the conditions for what happened."

"You didn't have to kill her!"

"I did!" Lelouch was breathing hard now. "That was the one thing… the only thing I could do to make up for…" He shook his head. "The least I could do was kill her, Suzaku. She wouldn't have wanted to live like that."

Suzaku, you're Japanese, aren't you?
No, I mustn't. I can't even think such a thing.

"I don't care." Suzaku closed his mind to that memory. "I could have kept her safe, kept her from hurting anyone…"

"She would have tried to kill you and your geass wouldn't have let her." Lelouch's voice was oddly gentle. "What would you be, Suzaku, with Euphy's blood on your hands?"

"What are you?" Suzaku asked quietly.

Lelouch leaned back. "I'm Zero."

"I hate you."

"…I know."

There wasn't much more to say after that. Rolo whispered something to Lelouch who just shook his head and drew the smaller boy in for a warm embrace. Kallen relaxed finally beside Suzaku and let him fume in silence. The transport landed about an hour later and their pilot came to retrieve them.

"One moment." Lelouch smiled. "Jeremiah, if you would please…"

"Of course, Your Highness." Suzaku felt a strange, almost nauseating feeling as the man focused on him, and then nothing except Lelouch watching him expectantly.

"…what?"

Lelouch smiled and drew his own gun. "Your geass is gone. You can die whenever you want now." His smiled hardened. "Or whenever other people want, depending on the circumstances. Kallen, if you would?"

Suzaku let Kallen uncuff him without a struggle as the gun in Lelouch's hand suddenly held more weight. A genuine threat or a… promise?

"I'm not gonna make you shoot me, Lelouch." Suzaku walked past him without giving him another look. "I want to see this through to the end."

Lelouch chuckled fondly, every inch in control now. "I think you'll be pleasantly surprised."

OoO-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-OoO

"Lulu, Suzaku!" Shirley jumped up from Milly's side the moment she saw them, waving enthusiastically. "And Rolo and… Kallen?"

"Kallen?" Milly and Rivalz chorused, scrambling up as well to see the small group approaching them.

Milly hummed. "A Knight of Rounds and a Black Knight side by side…"

Rivalz laughed nervously. "I bet Lelouch got them to make up. Although if Kallen's back…" He looked nervously at Shirley.

She wasn't there. She was already running up to them, throwing her arms around Kallen. "You're okay! We were all so worried when we hadn't heard from you and then the Black Knights came back and every time there was a fight I worried about you and Suzaku and Gino and Anya and… what's wrong?"

Kallen hadn't moved since Shirley hugged her, standing stiff and still and trembling a little. She blinked hard and tears leaked from the edges of her eyes. "Shirley… your father, I'm so… so sorry."

Shirley deflated a little. "That's okay. It wasn't you, Kallen. I'm just so glad you're safe."

By this time, Rivalz and Milly had caught up to them. "Where the hell have you been?" Rivalz demanded of Lelouch. Milly ignored them and joined Shirley in hugging Kallen.

Lelouch, honestly, preferred Rivalz's rather ruder greeting. "It's an incredibly long story and probably requires sitting down somewhere private."

"Okay," Rivalz said. "As soon as the girls are done their love-fest." It would be a while. "Who're you?"

Jeremiah bowed slightly. "Jeremiah Gottwald, at your service."

"Only not really, he's just being polite." Lelouch herded the teary girls and impatient Rivalz to the Student Council Room. Jeremiah and Suzaku followed, slightly bemused.

Once they were all seated, Lelouch cleared his throat. "So. Let's start at the beginning. Jeremiah?"

This time Suzaku felt nothing, but he could tell by the reactions from everyone else that they felt something similar to when Jeremiah had erased his geass. "Lelouch, what are you…"

"I don't… where's Nunnally?"

"Lulu is…"

"You… you're not Lelouch's brother."

Lelouch hit Rivalz lightly on the head with rolled up papers. "Don't tease Rolo because he's my half-sibling."

"Oh… right…" Suzaku could literally see the moment when that became the most reasonable explanation to everyone present. "And Nunnally?"

"She's in hiding since she relinquished control of Area 11," Lelouch said. "I have no idea where she is, but Odysseus has assured me that she's safe."

Milly sighed. "Let me tell you, the moment Nunna-chan took office, I was glad that secret was out. It was hard hiding royalty!"

"We appreciated it very much." Lelouch smiled. "Although I technically resigned any claim to the throne when I was exiled. And Rolo's not exactly acknowledged royalty."

"…Lulu is…"

"What did you just do?" Kallen hissed.

Lelouch raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean? Oh, right. I need to tell you where I was. Sorry for dashing off like that, but…"

"No, no," Milly said. "I assume that with everything that was happening, you'd be called back. But did they need Rolo as well?"

Rolo sat up straighter. "My place is by Lelouch's side."

Lelouch shot him an affectionate look. "Or by Nunnally's if Odysseus would let us in on the secret. But then again, I suppose I'm grateful for the level of security around her."

"What are you gonna do now that the Black Knights have won?" Rivalz asked. Kallen glowered at him and he grinned back cheekily.

"We're allies now," Lelouch pointed out. "Or we will be when the treaty's signed. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if there were closer connections formed between Japan and Britannia within the year."

"Japan, huh." Rivalz sighed. "That's gonna take some getting used to."

Lelouch smiled, leaning forwards, eyes glittering with pleasure and victory. "It'll be worth it, Rivalz. You'll see."

Suzaku was very nearly sick as they left the room, everyone's memories basically returned to normal with the slight addition of Rolo and Lelouch's and Nunnally's royal heritage. It was as if the geass had never existed. Still, the way Lelouch played them and manipulated them… his supposed friends…

"Lelouch can I talk to you?" Shirley had been very quiet up until now and Suzaku was surprised to hear the tremor and suppressed fear in her voice. "…in private?"

"Of course." Lelouch gently took Shirley's elbow and guided her back into the room. Suzaku swallowed his nausea and followed. "…Suzaku?"

"I'm not leaving you alone with her." Suzaku glared. Lelouch looked at him for a moment, then simply nodded and gestured for him to take a seat. Shirley cast a doubtful gaze at Suzaku and Lelouch smiled gently at her.

"It's okay, Shirley. Suzaku and I don't have any secrets between us." A beat. "Anymore."

Suzaku grunted in irritation but couldn't deny the truth of that. As far as he knew.

"So then he knows that you're…" Rolo was suddenly in the room and Suzaku was half out of his seat when Shirley lowered her voice and continued. "You're Zero?"

"Lelouch?" Rolo had drawn his blade and was looking coolly at Lelouch, awaiting orders. Suzaku judged the distance between him and Rolo and the distance between Rolo and Shirley and the fact of Rolo's geass and realized there was no way he would get there in time if Lelouch ordered it…

"Rolo, come here." Lelouch smiled and patted the seat beside him. "Yes, Shirley. Suzaku knows, as do Rolo and Kallen. And you." He leaned forward. "You won't be harmed for this knowledge, I assure you, nor for whatever you want to do about it."

Shirley nodded. "I want… I want to help you."

Suzaku had not been expecting that. From Lelouch's expression, neither had he. Only Rolo looked unsurprised.

"I want to make you and Nunnally and… and Rolo happy. I want to help protect you."

Lelouch recovered admirably quickly. "You… you can't Shirley," he said gently. "It's just not something you can do. I'm sorry. The best thing would be for you to forget–"

"No, please!" She looked terrified and Lelouch drew back. "Please don't take away my memories and my feelings again, Lulu. It was… it was so lonely being with you and knowing there was something missing and I… I love you."

Suzaku flushed and looked away. He shouldn't be here for this.

"I love you. I… even knowing how you caught my father in all this, I simply couldn't hate you. Even though you made me forget everything, I still fell in love with you. Even though I lost my memories, I kept falling in love with you all over again." Tears were running down her cheeks and landing on her clenched fists. "I suppose that it's simply fate."

Lelouch reached out and brushed the tears away. "There is no fate, Shirley," he said, coldly and Suzaku's head snapped up in disbelief. Lelouch looked completely untouched. "There are only personal choices. And just because you keep making the same ones, doesn't mean they're the correct ones."

"…but…"

"Don't worry." Lelouch's lips twisted into something like a smile. "First loves are supposed to end in heartbreak. You'll find someone better."

Shirley stared at him before bursting into tears and running out of the room. Lelouch sighed and sat back, looking tired.

Suzaku stood up. "You bastard!"

OoO-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-OoO

When Shirley ran past Kallen and Milly as they caught up, crying and clearly trying to hide it, they made quick eye contact and moved in separate directions; Milly rushing after Shirley and Kallen returning to the Student Council room.

She wasn't sure what she'd expected to see, but Lelouch spitting blood from a split lip and Suzaku pinned down by Rolo, the blade at his neck drawing blood it was pressed so closely, wasn't it.

"…not a human, feeling bone in your body!" Suzaku didn't even seem to notice that Rolo was on top of him, as he snarled angrily at Lelouch.

"And if I'd accepted?" Lelouch snapped back. "What would you have punched me for then? Entrapment?"

"You could have been less of an ass about it," Suzaku yelled back. "Maybe if you thought about other people's feelings for once, you wouldn't end up screwing up every relationship you've ever had!"

So. Lelouch had made Shirley cry by rejecting her harshly and Suzaku was acting like a sort of friend and punching some sense into him. This would have been less absurd if they hadn't hated each other. Or if Lelouch's little brother wasn't straddling Suzaku's supine form with a dagger to his neck.

"Quit it!" Everyone turned to Kallen. "Look, Shirley ran out here crying and that's… that sucks. But it's over and it hardly merits bloodshed and murder." She'd read Rolo's expression easily. God, that boy was cold. "Now if everyone could just put on their big boy pants and stop squabbling like children, maybe we can do something about this."

Unsurprisingly, it was Rolo who moved first, getting off Suzaku and not quite putting his dagger away, but not brandishing it at least. Suzaku got up and sulkily didn't face Lelouch, but at least there was no violence in his stance.

Lelouch just remained seated, accepting the tissue that Rolo handed him, but otherwise clearly caught up within his own mind. Kallen knew how hard he was to drag out, so she left him alone.

"Is she okay?" Suzaku asked softly. At least he seemed to really care, rather than just using it as an excuse to hit Lelouch.

"Milly's with her." Kallen looked around awkwardly. "Maybe, once things are calmed down…"

"We're leaving in one hour," Lelouch interrupted. "There are things that we need to do and they won't get done here."

"What?" Suzaku turned on him again and Rolo's grip tightened around the dagger and Kallen felt the beginning of a migraine developing. Probably. She'd never had a migraine before.

Lelouch stood. "Kallen and Rolo and Jeremiah and I are leaving in an hour." His enunciation was perfect. "Things are moving quickly for us and we need to be there." He turned to Suzaku, his expression part glare, part sneer. "You, of course, may do whatever you wish. There are numerous tall buildings in Tokyo, Suzaku. The fall should be painless and the landing, if you manage it right, only briefly painful."

…was he telling Suzaku to go kill himself? Kallen held her breath as Suzaku's eyes widened with shock and… hurt? Rolo looked quietly amused.

"That's it then?" Suzaku sounded incredibly subdued compared to the snarling boy moments before.

Lelouch shrugged. "Or you could return with us. Or go back to Britannia which, in a few weeks, will amount to the same thing."

Suzaku snorted. "You're really selling the suicide option, aren't you?" He rolled his eyes. "Is there any way to get the Lancelot back?"

"Lord Asplund has already been sent to rendezvous with the Ikaruga," Lelouch said. "I might have given it to Kallen, but she seems rather attached to her Guren."

"Damn right," Kallen growled. "I wouldn't touch that impractical frame with anything other than the Radiation Wave arm."

Suzaku shook his head. "Then I guess you'll need a devicer."

Lelouch met his gaze evenly. "I don't need anything."

Kallen sighed. Stupid boys… "Look, are you joining us or not, Suzaku?"

Suzaku looked at her gravely. "If only to be in a position to stop you from going too far." Even now, he was only speaking to Lelouch.

"Then be ready to leave in half an hour." Lelouch swept grandly out of the room.

Kallen looked at Suzaku. "Wanna lay odds that Milly will grab him by the ear and make him apologize to Shirley?"

Suzaku shrugged. "I don't gamble on sure things, Kallen."