Title: The Male Equivalent Of A Cameltoe Is A Moose Knuckle
Prompt: Write something based on these pictures: sheepskeleton.(tu)(mblr).com(/)post/183004539605
Rating: K+?
Pairing: None (Gintoki&Hijikata, but could be read as shippy)
Length: 323 words
"Oi, Hijikata-kun, how long do we have to hold these poses? My legs are killing me, and my balls are chafing. They're gonna shrivel up and die."
"Don't ask me, stupid perm-head, I'm not the photographer! And it's your fault I got dragged off the street with you to this weird photo shoot in the first place!"
"Shut up! Don't complain when you got the easier pose! Owww, my arm! Oi! Can I swap with him?!"
"It's almost perfect, Sakata-san, just give me a more natural expression! This photo shoot's theme is the duality of man. Dark and light. The constraints on the soul. Try to reflect that on your face."
"It's reflecting the constraints on my balls! Just take the picture already!"
Snap!
"Boss, I think that perm-haired guy is gonna have to sit the next shoot out. I think he's passed out. Some part of him has passed out."
"Tch... Alright. Well, the other guy was better at this, anyway. Much more expressive, a true natural who becomes one with his craft."
"No, I think his leg's asleep. His leg is definitely asleep. He was just trying to hide his discomfort."
"It's fine, it's fine. He'll find a way to make it work. Oh! Very good, Hijikata-san! Such an elegant pose, draped over the stairs! You have the makings of a model!"
"He just fell over. His arms were asleep too."
"Can I... Go home now? Ow! Yorozuya! Where did you come fr-"
"Hiiiijikata-kuuun... I'm only getting paid for this if both of us stay and do this whole photo shoot. That's what they said from the beginning, right? You remember, right? Putting dinner on the table takes priority over either of our k*ntama going numb in these tight-ass leggings right now. You're not going anywhere, bastard."
"Oh! Such an expressive and natural scene of conflict! I can feel the passion of the human soul. Carry it into your next picture, too!"