To The Toph
You can now rent this line for your own messages! Please call 555-NOTREAL and we'll discuss charges!
The Abysswalker: What kind of customer would you be? I'd guess you'd belong to a clique of teenagers. Or maybe a beached whale? I jest of course!
Karts Of Sugar Rush: This time, I think it was more the vehicle Topher drove (:D).
Applause2014: Why thank you!
For those who still remember this story: I'm way too late with updating this I know, but this chapter was just so incredibly hard to write!
Yadayada, you know the drill, rated T for minor cussing.
And that's all already! Go reading!
Chapter 4: First Gig
On a morning less than a week after my encounter with Samey, I sat on my sleeper couch, waiting for my laptop to turn on. When it was on, I wanted to check my mail, but to my surprise, I had to insert Max's internet password again! I sighed as I put the laptop beside me and headed to Max's apartment. Max changes his password every few days. Luckily, I've discovered a trick how to get it.
''Yo Max, are you there?'' I shouted while knocking on his door.
''What do you want, underling?'' Max 'evilly' replied from the other side of the door.
''What are you thinking of right now?'' I asked.
''Uhm, Brussels sprouts.'' He calmly answered before I wrote it down on a noteblock. That's his password, now let's see if he added any numbers.
''And any number by any chance?''
''99. But why do you-'' He said. Max is like an open book that you don't even have to read to know what the ending is.
''Thank you.'' I half-heartedly thanked him before I left before Max could fully ask his question.
I headed back to my apartment (Where thankfully my laptop still stood, as I forgot to lock the door) and inserted the password. After a few tries alternating with caps, I cracked Max's internet and checked my mail. Between the numerous spam mails advertising enhancement drugs (Which, for the record, I absolutely don't need), I got a response from mommy.
'Dear Topher, it's good to hear that my boy is getting by in the 'real world'. Here in Osoyoos, not everything is well. I was getting by on a small budget, but our car isn't what it once was and it broke down. Now I can't get to work and can't pay for the car repair either. But don't let this news bother you, you need everything you can get yourself right now. I'll borrow something from Derrick. Lots of love, mom.' She wrote.
This is bad. I want to help mommy, I owe it to her. But I'm broker than broke myself at the moment! I stand up and pace around the room for a moment with my hands in my hair. If Samey doesn't get me hooked up with that commercial guy, I'm screwed.
Then someone knocked on my door, so I opened it. revealing a smiling Samey to be standing at the other side. Speaking of the devil.
''Hi!'' She chirped.
''Hey.'' I numbly replied.
''I have good news!'' She calmly announced.
''Cool.'' I sighed with a fake, weary smile.
''You don't seem to be awfully happy for someone who hears that.'' Samey noted with a raised eyebrow.
''I got a lot going on right now. Don't worry, that's not because of you.'' I assured Samey before I let her into my home and shut the door. ''Make yourself at home. It's not much, but...'' I tried to make my home sound a little better than it is. ''Who am I kidding, it's not much.'' I admitted rather downcast while I sat down on my couch while Samey took a chair and sat opposite of me. This place can hardly be made better by words only.
''Don't say that. At least you're living in a safe neighborhood. You don't want to live in The Jungle, it can be outright dangerous there!''
''I beg to differ.'' I mumbled.
''Anyway, I talked to the guy from the commercial firm, and I managed to talk him into getting you a sort of internship at the TV studios where the commercials are shot in exchange for a free therapy session. And if he thinks you're good, he'll consider hiring you!'' She explained.
''That's...Very nice!'' I humbly responded, yet inside, I was jumping up and down out of happiness! This came at the right time.
''I do hope that you don't have any other appointments at the moment, because he'd like to meet you later today!''
''Do I look like I have anything to do?'' I vividly asked her before I ran into my bathroom. ''I'll gussy myself up a little and I'm on the go!'' I told her while I covered up my spots, did my hair a little and strutted out of the bathroom to get a coat.
''I can bring you if you want.'' Samey offered while we walked out of my apartment.
''You've done enough, I'll be fine!'' I assured her as I locked the door and walked towards the stairwell.
''Please, I insist!'' She insisted with a confidant grin, firmly tugging the sleeve of my coat which caused me to stop walking. I raised my eyebrows out of surprise. Is this the same Samey as back on the island?
''Okay then.'' I agreed before we both walked down the stairs. When we were about to go from the 2nd to the 1st floor, I spotted the landlord out of the corner of my eye down below. Snap, I forgot to pay my rent, and I don't have any money on me either! What to do now?
As I pondered for a solution to the inevitable eviction, I leant a little too hard on the banister and it broke off, sending me tumbling down the entire remaining staircase! This isn't made better by the fact that it made several sharp turns, I pay rent for this dump? I just hope I'm not bruised too bad...
''...Ouch...'' I groaned as I laid on the floor, looking like I was unconscious as I could hear the landlord approach.
''Hey Fontaine, your rent's due motherfucker! And don't be pulling that 'falling down the stairs shit' on me, you hear?! Yeah, you're conscious!'' He yelled at me while Samey stormed down as well. I remember that if you pretend to be dead, predators leave you to be, maybe it works with landlords as well, they're very much alike.[1]
''Slow down a bit!?'' Samey scolded the landlord. ''He just fell down the stairs and you expect him to pay right away?''
''He's late with the rent so I have all right to expect that.'' The landlord grumbled. There's no need to stop acting like I'm unconscious yet.
''What do you owe him?'' Samey sternly asked before I peeked on the 2 and saw that Samey was getting a chequebook out of her coat.
''About 500 dollars.'' The landlord explained. There was a silence between the 2 as the only noise I could hear was that of a pen. It was then that I slowly got up, pretending to awake from being unconscious, and rubbed my head. I could see Samey writing a cheque and handing it to the landlord.
''There.'' Samey snarled. The landlord muttered something inaudible to me as he disappeared back into his own quarters.
''Did you just pay him?'' I asked a little surprised as I tried to get up from the floor. She hummed and nodded her head in reply while she pulled me on my feet.
''It's never wrong to help others, right? Especially if they're pretending to be unconscious.'' She told me, shooting me a dark, knowing gleam. Oh yes, Samey's a psychologist now, she isn't as naive anymore.
''I swear, that was a fear reflex!'' I assured her, which she obviously didn't buy as she kept shooting me that smile while lightly shaking her head. ''But why would you pay my rent?'' I asked her a little bewildered.
''I have money, and you need money. For other people who are dear to you.'' She answered as we walked outside towards her car, a pinkish red sedan. Did she read my email when I was doing my hair? That's rude.
Why is she helping me so much? I don't want her to help me! If she helps me with so many big things that means that I have to return the favors someday too! I look at my reflection in Samey's rear-view mirror and I had to gasp of the way my hair looked, probably from that tumble down the stairs.
''Tell me, do I look bruised?'' I asked Samey a bit worried while I looked at her before I desperately tried to fix it.
''You look fine! No one cares if a guy has a bruise or 2, that's what makes them look manly!'' Samey tried to ensure me while she was driving.
''I care! I don't want to arrive there looking like I came straight out of a cage fight! I have more class than that!'' I almost hysterically responded, which made Samey giggle a little. ''What are you laughing at?'' I barked at her, which forced another fit of giggles out of her. I sighed, I'll never understand her.
Samey pulled up in front of the TV studios a short while later. Thank any god that I managed to fix my head on the way.
''Go to the reception and ask for Mr. Cho, he's our man- ehrm, I mean your man!'' Samey explained.
I sighed deeply. ''Thank you for all of this, and then I mean everything! The opportunity, the rent...Samey, If there's anything I can do in return, then-'' I suavely told her.
''Well, there is 1 thing.'' She humbly interrupted me. I groaned under my breath. I hoped that she'd decline any other favors in return as I said that out of politeness and hoping that she'd think that making use of said favors was impolite.
''Could you call me Sammy, or Samantha? Samey is my name from another period of my life.'' She requested. I blankly stared at her for a second. Is that all? She just wants me to call her by her 'real' name as a reward? Fine, if it makes her sleep at night.
''Of course, no biggie.'' I agreed as I unbuckled my seatbelt and opened the door. ''Thanks again, Sam!'' I thanked her (Hopefully for the last time), putting an emphasis on her name, which made her quietly giggle a bit again as I shut the door and walked towards the administration building while Samey drove away. I breathed in deeply and smiled confidently, this may very well be the beginning of everything!
I approached the reception desk and leaned onto it as I charmingly smiled at the receptionist. ''Could you tell me where I can find Mr. Cho, beautiful? Because I have an appointment with him. The name's Topher Fontaine.'' I suavely told her. The receptionist just blankly frowned at me and adjusted her glasses a little before looking it up on her computer.
''Mr. Cho's office is on the 4th floor, office 45. He's expecting you...'' She informed me. ''...Beautiful.'' She cynically added before I left. I glared back at her for a second as I walked towards the elevator, what's her damage?
I turned my head just in time to see the elevator doors shutting in front of me. I instead take the staircase, maybe that'll be good for my physique as well. I reached the 4th floor rather fatigued. I never really sported (Except for PE class, which I almost failed) and I know I'm not very athletic (I instead just carefully watched my diet), but this is really ridiculous! I can't even climb a few stairs anymore without breaking out in wheezes! I really need to get rid of that fast-food in my veins!
I found Mr. Cho's office and calmly knocked on the door a few times.
''Come in.'' He replied. I entered the small but well decorated office and saw Mr. Cho sitting behind the desk. Mr. Cho wasn't exactly physically appealing (But right now, I can't boast about that either.). He had a Asian look and was mostly bald, but he compensates what isn't on his head by having a short beard. No, it's clear to me that this man works here to produce commercials and not to act in them.
''Hello, I came for the internship.'' I explained a bit meekly, as I was pretty nervous now I stood in front of the man that could really start my career.
''Ah!'' He replied a little eagerly as he stretched his arm out to offer me a handshake. I got a bit startled when I saw that his hands were wrapped in bandages. I managed to contain my shock and shook it.
''Topher Fontaine.'' I introduced myself.
''William Cho. Sit down.'' He told me before we both sat down in our seats. ''Alright, the internship consists of doing chores and helping me out while I have my hands wrapped up!'' Mr. Cho began explaining, finishing with a short chuckle while holding his hands up to me, to which my nervous smile dropped. Instead of directly getting to star in commercials, I have to wipe this guy's behind all day! Well, at least I'm in the right industry now, and it's a paid internship, so I might as well try.. ''Part of a therapy.'' He quickly pointed out before he hid them under the table again. I wonder what he's being treated for then.
''And eventually I may gradually teach you the art of television making.'' He began explaining. ''But tell me about yourself. Our mutual contact told me a few things, but she didn't seem to know you fully and I want to get a good view of you.''
''We've met each other again after a few years, so it's indeed not like she's been my girlfriend for the past few years or something.'' I shrugged off, trying to sound formal. I mentally prepared to tell my life story. ''But about me, I come from Osoyoos, a small town in British Columbia. And ever since I understood what a TV was, I adored it, the people on it and wished to star in my own TV show!'' I explained, leaning back in my chair and laying my arms in my neck.
''Why would you want to work here and not, say, at the movie studios? Why Television so badly?''
''I find acting incredibly overrated! It's right there in the word, you act. If it goes wrong, then everything stops and you can just retry! TV, or at least the kind I'd like to reach someday, is live and you can't permit any errors that way! Any spilled drink on your crotch or booger hanging out of your nose is recorded and put on the internet! That's the challenge!'' I lively explained, standing up and pacing around the office for a bit. I find actors highly overrated indeed. Mr. Cho nodded his head and looked fairly impressed. 1-0 for me!
''Okay, what do you consider to be your good traits?'' Mr. Cho asked.
''I'm charismatic, focused, have great improvisation skills, I dare to take risks and even though I don't look like it, I always try to look as representative as possible! Plus, I do have a lot of experience in commercial acting, but there's a lot of it that I'd rather not talk about.'' I answered slightly dismissive. ''My first television appearance was in Total Drama Pahkitew Island, when the show still had a respectable margin of popularity.''
''Ah yes, I remember you now!'' Mr. Cho replied, a small smile forming. Wow, someone recognized me! This is going good, but I need to make it a little better.
''Cool! And I lasted 8 whole episodes. I got a few good TV tips from my absolute idol Chris McLean while I was at it.'' I continued, perhaps sounding a bit too boastful. And I know I was lying when I said I got tips from Chris. He did give me one, but I was not happy with it!
''I remember that you tried to replace him as the host.'' He remarked, I'd swear that I heard a cynical undertone.
''Hey hey! He was my idol, but I had ambitions too!'' I defended myself.
''Trying to take people's jobs isn't the way to grow in this business.'' Mr. Cho declared.
''Yeah, well I learned my lesson, because afterwards, I did get on TV again, but that was a regional channel called OCRBC. I worked there for 10 years and mostly carried cables around, help build up the set up the and eventually, I got to host a talk show called Grain Of Truth until I quit to seek better opportunities in the TV world, which I hope you can give me.'' I continued, suavely pleading.
''Why did you quit?'' Mr. Cho asked me.
''An artistic disagreement.'' I responded laconically.
''I see.'' He mumbled before he typed something into his computer, which gave me an opportunity to wipe the sweat off of my brow and adjust my hair a little. Is it so hot in here or am I so nervous? I need some distraction, I see a letter laying about and I lean forward in my chair to read it. it turned out to be a letter from a insurance company requesting a commercial for funeral insurances. I felt an idea coming up for a commercial.
''Say, have you already produced the commercial for this one?'' I asked Mr. Cho as I showed him the letter, quietly gulping as I realized it may've come over as incredibly rude just nosing around his papers.
''No, we're still in the planning phase with that one.'' He replied before he resumed typing onto his keyboard.
''Well I got a sweet idea for a commercial!'' I eagerly told him before I shot up and stood right in front of his desk, catching his attention. ''Imagine a church where a funeral is being held, the reverend is giving the last sacrament and the visitors are mourning the recently passed when suddenly an insurance agent storms into the church and runs up to the altar. The agent interrupts the reverend and tells him that the deceased hasn't had his funeral insurance in order, to which the reverend responds by knocking on the coffin, calling it out to the deceased man, and to which that guy opens the coffin and is all like 'What?!' before the tagline turns up 'Hatfield funeral insurances, don't be caught sleeping.', or something!'' I lively formulated, making a lot of gestures with my hands during the example. Mr. Cho replied by laughing heartily. I got quite nervous, was he laughing at me or with me?
''That's pretty funny stuff!'' Mr. Cho complimented me soon after. ''I mean we can't record a commercial like that because it's way too offensive.'' He quietly added. ''But it's great nonetheless!'' He continued. I suddenly felt really great about myself.
''That's what I learnt from my time at the regional channel. Improvising!'' I explained as I sat back in my chair. It's better for me that I don't tell that I gradually taught myself that by insulting the guests on Grain Of Truth.
''Alright, in the end, I've got a pretty good feeling about you, so you're hired.'' He suddenly concluded, stretching his hand out to me again, which of course, I shook with a bright gleam on my face.
''I'm pretty sure you won't regret it!''I assured him before I let go.
''But let me warn you kid, don't attempt to steal someone else's spot in here! Try to do it all yourself!'' Mr. Cho sternly advised me like I didn't know yet.
''I'll try!'' I promised.
''You better be.'' He replied. ''Meet me back here at Monday and I'll show you the ropes.'' Mr. Cho told me as I put my coat on. I'm finally into the business!
A little more than a month had passed. Like I predicted, I didn't get to do much besides fetching coffee and occasionally noting something down. But I am in the industry now and I get paid pretty well for an internship (And I could give mommy the money she needed), so I can't complain that much. The only thing that still bothers me is that I look like a slob. Losing weight has become incredibly hard lately, maybe Max can think of a solution, as he's into medicines and all.
I was bringing a coffee pot to Mr. Cho, who was at a meeting with a company. So I headed to the conference hall they were in and I opened the door as Mr. Cho, a few people who I thought were the production crew and a few representatives from that company were in the middle of discussing about a commercial, as I saw all kinds of formulas and such on the whiteboard behind him.
''Thanks Topher.'' Mr. Cho thanked after I filled a cup of coffee for him. Usually, I'd leave, but I stuck around because I was curious to what they wanted the actual commercial to be like.
''We believe the commercial itself can be done simply. A man who was once poor has become rich and living the good life because of all the money he saved by subscribing to Ufone.'' Someone from the production crew suggested after the representative had finished his explanation. Commercials for a telecommunications company are usually boring and incredibly annoying. And this concept wasn't promising. And I got an idea how to break that trend.
''No it really doesn't.'' I boldly countered. Everyone looked at me and I once again realized that I may've acted above my station again. ''I mean, it gives off a bad message.'' I continued rather meekly. ''If you make a commercial that tells the story of a man who got rich from all the money he saved, not only does that sound incredibly arrogant, but it's almost like 1 of those bait and click ads you find on the internet with things too good to be true, like how someone makes 3000 dollars a day or that you've won a free cell phone! And as a big company you don't want to be associated with those scam ads don't you?'' I explained.
''No, of course not.'' 1 of the representatives mumbled, shaking his head slightly.
''You've got a better idea then?'' The producer who pitched the former idea gruffly asked me. I think that he feels threatened by my explanation, I can see it in his attitude.
''What if you turn the situation around a little?'' I suggested as I once again began pacing around the spot I stood. ''A millionaire who had just gone from rags to riches, but keeps high spirits because he has a subscription with Ufone! And if you add some comedy by showing a few shots of a millionaire having to live a blue collar life.'' I finished explaining. The concept undeniably aroused the interest of both the representatives and the production crew, which made me feel pretty good about myself.
''Brilliant.'' Mr. Cho complimented me while he gently applauded, which made me feel even better.
''Like that, you got a commercial that's both funny and brings the message in a humble and original way! And who knows, maybe you'll win a Betsy with them!'' I enthusiastically continued. [2]
''Don't overdo it kid.'' 1 of the producers moodily shot me down. I bet he's just jealous that I outshined him.
''Thank you Topher, for this enlightening concept!'' Mr. Cho thanked me. I took this as a way to tell me to get out so I smiled, nodded my head slightly and left the room. I definitely left an impression, now I hope it was a good one.
Later that day, when I stood next to the coffee machine to make an espresso for myself, Mr. Cho came walking into the small kitchen.
''Hey Topher.'' He greeted me as he retrieved something from the fridge.
''How did the meeting go?'' I asked before taking a sip from my coffee.
''Nothing special, it's not like there's much on the line. You discuss with the company about the commercial and what you hope to achieve with it.'' Mr. Cho explained while he retrieved his lunchbox from the fridge and closed it. ''Again, splendid concept for that commercial kid! No one could deny that it was a great, fresh idea.'' He complimented me again as he put his lunchbox down on the counter.
''Did it pass?'' I curiously asked.
''Mostly. We figured that we have to shoot it in a real apartment for the authentic feeling, but with that, we've run out of money to hire a professional actor.'' Mr. Cho answered. I quietly squealed in joy. I feel so special that my idea is going to be a real commercial!
''And now?''
''They're going to hold auditions in 2 weeks here in the office to look for a cheaper actor.'' He answered before taking a bite out of his sandwich.
I really began to consider going to that audition. It's acting, but many famous people started out as commercial actors, and even though many of those ended up in movies, if I do this right, it could just be a step in the right direction.
''Can anyone audition?'' I asked. I had to be subtle because maybe Mr Cho doesn't want me to audition while I'm still an intern.
''Do you want to give it a try?'' Mr Cho guessed, much to my surprise.
''It can be a start of great things.'' I told him, perhaps a bit ambitiously, as I leaned against the counter. ''But if I pass the audition and go commercial, doesn't that conflict with my internship here?''
''Hey, if you want to quit, you can at any time. You've got my blessing, I'm sure you'll pass, if not this one then another.'' Mr Cho encouraged me before taking a bite from his sandwich.
''Alright then.'' I said, I felt that I was getting pretty excited over doing audition next week, and I desperately tried not to look all giddily about it.
''And if acting doesn't work out, you should consider producing commercials. You got talent for that!'' He continued before I got surprised by Mr Cho suddenly standing up and placing his hand on 1 of my shoulders.
''I'll remember it.'' I told him. But just because I told Mr. Cho that I'll remember it doesn't mean I will. I'm too big for this.
''And don't forget kid, no takeovers! Earn your own spot!'' Mr. Cho sternly warned me, standing up from the table.
''I won't, I've learnt my lesson.'' I assured him before I left the kitchen.
I was preparing myself for the audition about 2 weeks later. I tried to look like a 40-something old pretty rich man and I hoped to achieve that by dressing in a pretty formal navy blue jacket and tan pants, which I had to rent, and by doing my hair in a thick but neatly combed hairdo. I also grew a very small mustache for the act. I managed to get a sheet with the lines (Which usually only managers and agents can get) and have been practising them a lot lately. I do have experience with commercials, but those were commercials from lowbrow businesses meant to be broadcasted in the region, so I'm trying to rock this audition.
I checked my resume 1 last time, then my appearance, and then I was ready to go! I took the bus to the studios and waited for my turn.
''Topher Fontaine.'' 1 of the producers called out to me when a door opened on a chink. I headed into the room and saw 2 producers. 1 of them was also at the meeting I pitched my idea at. And he looked a little surprised to see me, in the negative sense. I hope that this doesn't affect my chances. He still was willing to shake my hand when I offered it.
''Topher Fontaine, I already found that name familiar.'' He said as we shook hands, I'd swear I could hear some disdain in his voice.
''You know him Hugh?'' The other producer asked, shaking my hand at his turn.
''Yes, this is the guy who came storming into the room and made our team look bad by pitching this idea we're having to work with now.'' Hugh (As his name apparently is) answered. Now I'm sure I could hear some annoyance.
''Then who's better at doing this commercial than the guy who thought it up huh?'' I lightheartedly asked.
''Not so fast hotshot.'' Hugh shot me down. ''1 swallow does not make spring, and 1 barely acceptable idea doesn't directly make you a superstar!'' He berated me. ''Now go stand on the spot.'' He moodily finished. I must've really hit a wrong wire with him during that meeting, I wonder if the rest of the crew views me like this as well. I laid down my resume on an empty chair and headed to the spot in front of them.
''So, what now?'' I politely ask.
''Say your lines.'' Hugh told me, having calmed down quite a bit.
''Alright.'' I said before I scraped my throat. It's all coming down to this. ''Yes, as quick as you can get rich, the quicker you can become poor again!'' I began, making myself sound older and a little jollier than I usually sound as to match my role. ''Crisis? I find it a breath of fresh air!'' I breezily continued, trying to sound sort of relieved. ''It's entering into a whole new world! It's like discovering fire again, but we needed some adjusting, especially my wife and the children.'' I humbly said, not having even looked at the script yet. ''I find it kind of cozy! In our previous home, we would not have seen each other for days!'' I continued before a short chuckle (Which sounded very good to me) But I have to get back to work, and get all kinds of smart deals! Luckily, I have a subscription at Ufone, that's the quality we're used to, but super cheap!'' I concluded my text (There were a few more bits of text, but those were for other roles) and had a good feeling. The producers at least didn't seem to hate it.
''Okay.'' Hugh called after writing something down. ''Could you improvise a line or 2?'' He asked.
''I can.'' I responded while I looked through my text for a bit of inspiration until I noticed the first line, which didn't sound very well, so I got a idea and faced the producers again.
''Who would've thought? From penthouse, to flophouse!'' I gently said before I used that short humored chuckle again, which forced a few chuckles out of both producers.
''I kind of like it! It's better than what we have now. We should consider putting it in the script!'' The other producer gleefully suggested while taking a note of it.
''Yeah, make it the commercial's catchphrase!'' I eagerly added, for which I received some annoyed stares from Hugh, which managed to put me back in my place as both Hugh and the other producer wrote on their clipboards and read my resume. And I could see from the other producer that he was impressed. After which they faced me again.
''Thank you for your time. When we have picked someone in about a week, we'll let you know. We'll call you, don't call us.'' Hugh explained.
''But I don't have a phone right now.'' I pointed out.
''Not a phone?'' Hugh repeated before he checked my data. ''We'll contact you, don't contact us.'' He corrected himself before handing me my resume back.
''Okay. Thank you for your time.'' I suavely thanked them before I shook their hands and left.
It was an agonizingly long week after the audition. I had not much to do besides waiting for that relieving message. I got even a few zits from all the worrying I did about whether I'd be picked or not. Today alone I've refreshed my mailbox over a 100 times, hoping that that email would finally arrive. Until 1 moment, I pressed the refresh key another time, and I saw that an email from the company had arrived! I punched in the air out of pure happiness and quickly opened the email.
'Mr Fontaine, after comparing all the candidates for the role in the Ufone commercial, we found you to be the most suitable actor because of your previous experience.' The first part of the email read. I leaned back on my couch and quietly cheered for myself before I continued reading. 'Please meet us in front of the Fulham tower on Norman Drive in Rexdale, Toronto on the 25th of February around 10 AM. Sincerely, Bergman Productions.' I concluded reading before I put the laptop down and just enjoyed this news for a moment.
Then I realized that I live on Norman Drive, so where was this tower then? I quickly walked out of the building and spotted the Fulham tower at the other end of the street. I frowned and crossed my arms while looking at the tower. This was a smack in the face. Of course it was nice that I only had to walk down the street to get to work, but that's also a painful reminder of where I live, as they literally could've picked my apartment to shoot the commercial in. I just hope the crew doesn't see me coming out of here, this house isn't exactly a reflection to myself right now.
After a long 2 days of filming, the commercial was completely shot. It went by pretty fast because we needed only a few takes and, if I'm allowed to say it, I went through them almost faultless, no matter that the director complained about my ambitious behavior.
After some more days of editing, it was finished and ready to be seen! I was excited and was watching the channel the producers told me was going to be broadcasted on.
The channel in question was broadcasting a soccer match between Canada and Germany though. But that didn't really matter at all. With the soccer craze in Canada growing stronger every day, I'm sure many people will get to see the commercial! It was halftime, Canada was leading with 1-0 (And I don't know if that was good or not), but I didn't care for that. I never wanted to see the commercial break as badly as right now. A few other ads were shown, but then I recognized the apartment of the Fulham tower and rubbed my hands in excitement. Here comes my moment!
I walked into view, dressed and looking similarly to what I wore on the day of my audition.
''Yeah, Who would've thought that huh?'' I asked the viewer as I stood in front of a cityscape with my hands in my pocket. They really liked that line! ''From penthouse, to flophouse!'' I continued before I chuckled briefly as the camera panned out to reveal me standing in the modest living room while the cityscape was revealed to be only a mural on a blind wall. After which a shot followed of me and the actress playing my wife were hauling a large, expensive family portrait.
''Crisis? I find it a breath of fresh air!'' I breezily said, just like in my audition, while I was standing in the small kitchen before a shot was shown of a big house with a sign in the yard of it being seized by the bank and my car being towed away. ''It's entering into a whole new world! It's like discovering fire again, but we needed some adjusting, especially my wife and the children.'' I continued off-screen while my family dispiritedly stood next to a rental trailer and a small car, which I was stuffing.
''I find it kind of cozy! In our previous home, we would not have seen each other for days!'' I told the viewer in another shot where I tried to twist myself and a silver platter of snacks through a small door opening while the actress playing my daughter indifferently kept standing there. ''But I do have to get back to work, and get all kinds of smart deals!'' I said while sitting on a couch and opening a newspaper. ''So now, we all have a subscription at Ufone, that's the quality we're used to, but super cheap!'' I assured the viewer before the screen turned red, the Ufone logo appeared and the voiceover took over. That's when I sat back and began to enjoy this feeling of satisfaction telling me that I'll get to the top eventually![3]
I relaxed for a few more minutes when I realized that I should mail this to mom, if she hadn't seen it already! She'd be proud! I was about to write her a email until I was surprised by a new mail popping up, from Samey. I groaned and reluctantly opened the mail. Yes, without her I wouldn't be in this commercial, but I offered her a reward and she declined. Can't she get the message that I'm not interested in a reunion? Or do I have to ignore her a little more?
'Was that you Topher? Of course it was!' I began reading. I couldn't help but sigh at the cheesy opening of this mail. 'That commercial was terrific! From penthouse to flophouse, that was a real funny line! Did you only act in it or did you help writing it too for example? A lot of actors help in the production these days, so I was wondering. Good luck with the rest, XO XO, Samantha.'
I sighed and began to type my reply.
'Hi Sammy. Even though I didn't 'officially' help in shooting the commercial, I did come up with the whole idea of it when I was working for Mr Cho, and I improvised that line you found so funny. By the way, thank you for causing all this. If you didn't introduce me to Mr Cho, I'd be broke and probably homeless now. Even though you said you wanted nothing in return, I feel like the least I can do is buying you dinner. How does that sound? Cheers, Topher.' I typed, reciting it before I sent it away. Even though I don't want to be with Samey, maybe if I do hang around with her, she'll introduce me to someone else, someone more influential, and with the splendid pay I got for the ad, I can buy her (And myself) pretty good meals to help me with that.
I opened another blank email and started typing again, this 1 was for mommy. 'Dear mom. Have you seen the commercial yet? My first on national TV! Now everyone from Halifax to Vancouver has seen me in action! I'm sure this is the beginning of slowly being uplifted to my goal! And, I got paid pretty well! If there's anything you need, tell me, and I'll find a way to get it for you! Love, Topher.' I eagerly tapped down before I sent this 1 away too before I shut off my laptop, leaned back and enjoyed this positive turn of events some more.
Some days later, I was looking over lake Ontario, standing under the CN tower. It was an exceptional sunny day in March and I had to be outside to catch some rays, which will hopefully do my skin some good. I was lucky that I had to be a bit fat for the role in the Ufone ad, but it'll probably cost me more gigs than my current appearance will earn me.
Suddenly, my new phone rang (Which I recently bought). I didn't recognize the number calling me, but I picked up anyway.
''Who is this?''
''Hello, big fish!'' A flamboyant-sounding voice greeted me. Although it was hard, I could recognize who it belonged to.
''Dakota?'' I asked, a little baffled to say the least. Why is she calling me until I realized that I only had my phone for 1 day, and that I didn't remember exchanging phone numbers with Dakota.''Hold on, how did you get my number?'' I suspiciously asked.
''Connections, my dear! They open up a lot of possibilities.'' She smugly replied.
''Okay.'' I said, slightly creeped out. ''Why are you calling?''
''You've grown from a small fish to a slightly bigger 1, and I'm reeling you in.'' Dakota cryptically answered.
''What do you mean by that?'' I asked her, pretty irritated because she won't come to the point.
''I saw your commercial and it didn't annoy me to death, so I looked it up on the internet and saw all kinds of memes, jokes and such dedicated to it without even looking for that.'' Dakota pointed out. I was so happy with my first gig that I totally forgot to check the internet for reactions.
''Memes?'' I confusedly repeated while I leaned against a railing.
''The voice of the internet hon, a great way to get publicity.'' She briefly explained. ''But you promised that you'd call me when Canada has a faint idea of who you are. But you didn't call, so I thought that I should break the ice.'' Dakota told me. I forgot about that too. Dakota wants to be my agent? That's excellent! I had to oppress the need to cheer in public.
''So what now?'' I asked her a little excited.
''We should talk things over. Can you meet me at my office in a few days?'' Dakota asked.
''I could meet you now.'' I casually suggested.
''Go then! My time is valuable!'' Dakota calmly barked at me. ''It's in the Sultan building in downtown Toronto on the corner of Norton Avenue and Mcafree Street. My office is on the 19th floor.'' [4]
''I'll be there in an hour!'' I assured her before I hung up and began running towards my goal (Almost being hit by a bus when I crossed the road). If Dakota thinks I'm worthy of being her client, then I must've done something good indeed!
The word commercial was mentioned 40 times in this chapter! Including this post scriptum!
[1] Parodying a scene from the movie Coming To America
[2] The Betsy's are referencing the Bessies, Canada's commercial award.
[3] I have to be honest here. I copied this commercial off of a series of commercials for a telecom provider at changed it slightly. I just enjoyed it so much.
[4] I based every street name mentioned in this chapter off of antivirus software names.
I may've said it earlier, but for anyone who fears it: Yes, I will do Samey X Topher, but as you can read in this (And the following one, which will begin to explore it) Topher won't date Samey because he's attracted to her.
So, again, apologies for any inconveniences, but I do hope that you enjoyed the chapter nonetheless!
;:J,
L.W.