Saturday morning, a few weeks later
When you are four years old, three working weeks and two weekends are an immense ocean of time. When you start out the first Monday by going to the shelter and coming back with your very own cat, the weeks seem like an entire lifetime of experiences.
The time, however, does pass, and one Saturday morning you are suddenly put into a strange and uncomfortable dress of a horrible colour and told to go outside and to keep out of the way. But you are not to get dirty, not rip your clothes and not wander off and get lost.
To cap it all, Stacey and Kelley were told that someone would soon come outside to keep an eye on them.
"What's the point of being outside together if we are not allowed to do anything," Kelley complained.
"Yeah, this is super-boring," Stacey agreed.
The cat didn't say anything. She was talking leaves on the lawn.
After a while, the Possible kitchen door opened and Aunt Joss stepped out onto the patio.
This, at least, was good news. Except for their mothers, Aunt Joss was by far the most fun and most bad-ass relative of them all.
"Hiya, kids! What'cha doin'?"
"Nothing," Stacey answered pointedly.
"Hanging with Mal," Kelley continued.
"Mal?"
"Yeah, this is Mal. She's a cat. Mal is short for Mallyfishent, the beautiful green lady in Sleeping Beauty," Kelley explained.
"O' course!" Of course, the daughter of Shelley McGoohan would see Maleficent as the glorious main character of that particular movie. Of course, her name was a bit of a mouthful for small kids. Hence Mal. "What kin'a cat is she?"
Stacey shrugged. "She's just a cat."
"Ah. Non pure-bred american shorthair, then?"
"No, cat. She's all black with a white patch under her chin."
This much was obvious to even the most casual observer, but Stacey evidently thought it needed saying.
"Hi there, Mal," Joss Possible said, reaching out to scratch the little cat behind the ears. Mal purred.
'"Why aren't you in a pink dress, like us? Aren't you going to the church?
"Sure," Joss responded. "Ah'm one of the maids a' honour, after all. But Ah'll be drivin' my bike there, and then a dress isn't very handy. Ah'll change when Ah get to the church."
"That's not fair! Why couldn't we dress at the church, too?"
"Well, Ah guess your mommies won't really have the time to help you with that later. An' they're getting dressed right now as well."
"Well, I think we could all go dressed as usual, anyway. You look great just like that, Aunt Joss."
Kelley blushed a little with the last statement. She didn't usually compliment other women on their looks.
Aunt Joss was dressed in what she always wore for work. That meant she had skinny black jeans riding low on her hips and her feet stuck into slightly scuffed cowboy boots. Her white tank top was short and, in combination with the jeans, left a lot of her belly bare, displaying a nasty scar down the left side of her abdomen. On her head, she had a large and floppy renaissance-style beret with a big, golden badge at the side. The badge showed an intricate and spooky-looking symbol; the same design that was also displayed in silver on the back of her black leather biker's jacket together with her company logo, JP3I. This was meant to be pronounced Jippee-Three-Eye and stood for Jocelyn Possible Paranormal Private Investigator. She had pilot-style sunglasses with the kind of lenses that look like mirrors from the outside; the glasses partly hiding another scar running from her right eyebrow and down over her cheek. This was, according to Stacey and Kelley, the coolest outfit ever and well suited for formal occasions like church weddings.
"Thanks, kids," Joss said, "but Kimmie and Shelley have asked me to be one of the maids of honour and Aunt Monique has decided that means that Ah need to wear a pink dress, too. An' she says it's a light terracotta, and not pink."
The children thought for a while, before Kelley presented the assembly with a statement.
"You know," she said, "the mummies are all so worked up about this and so stressed, that I guess we should try to do like they want. The leastest problem and they're gonna have a meltdown. Kimmie-mum will drive her first through the living-room wall again."
"Shelley-mother will melt the kitchen sink!"
"Your Kimmie-mummie will throw the TV through the window! And the video game consoles!"
"Your mum will just leave a big smoking hole in the ground were the house stood!"
The consequences seemed severe, but at the same time very entertaining for four year olds.
"So," Joss said, "you're gonna behave, then? That's mighty mature of ya!"
"Yeah, I guess …"
"… this once!"
Mal also decided to behave nicely, and jumped up onto the lap of Aunt Joss and, after some pawing around, went to sleep.
So Joss petted the cat. The cat slept. Time passed. Stacey and Kelley did nothing much, shuffling their shows in the dust in spite of the promises of good behaviour.
After a while, Kelley had some questions.
"Have you caught any ghosts lately, Aunt Joss?"
"Ghosts? Who do ya think Ah am? The Ghostbustahs? Ghosts are mostly harmless, anyway. Ah try to leave them alone if Ah can."
"Any slimy monsters, then?"
"No monsters lately."
"Well," Stacey continued probing, "howsabout trolls?"
"Yeah, Ah did actually catch a troll a coupl'a weeks back, up in the mountains. It was a small troll, living under a small bridge, but people complained."
"Did it eat all the goats?"
"No, no goats around. But people walking their dogs had some trouble. So Ah caught it and released it way up inna' mountains. Nasty critter. It tried to bite me in … well, my backside."
The girls giggled.
"So all the folks were happy, then? You're a hero?"
"Not so much. The one that called me in paid my fee, but nobody else knows what happened. But the dogs, now, they were happy! Ah got a lot of sticks, balls, dog-treats and bones as a thank you!"
More giggles, although the girls were not entirely certain that Aunt Joss was serious all the time. Didn't matter. Catching trolls was an awesome job.
"Hey, Kittycat? Ya don't want a stick or a bone, do ya? How about a ball?"
"Not if a dog has slobbered on it!"
"Right. Ah'll bring ya a proper cat toy, instead, okay?"
The cat paid no attention to these promises, but continued purring in her sleep as Joss stroked her.
Eventually, Grandma Anne opened the kitchen door.
"Hey, girls! Come on in. Miss Flores is going to give us some final instructions."
Stacey and Kelley knew Miss Flores better as Aunt Zita. She was a cheerleading friend of Kimmie-mum, like Miss Tara and the Bonnie-witch. She was invited to the wedding, but she also had a job fixing parties and arranging events, and Shelley-mother had immediately engaged her as a wedding planner.
There were a lot of folks in the Possible living room: Grandpa James and Great-grandma Nana; Uncle Slim, Uncle Wade and Uncle Drew; and Cousin Larry and his mother.
"Now, listen up!" Aunt Zita said and rapped her knuckles on the door jamb to get everyone's attention. "Just a few last things!
"First, Kimberly is leaving now, with Tara as company, in one of the limos."
"The Bentley S3," Uncle Slim supplied.
"Yeah, one of the cars. Shelley will leave from her own house soon, with Monique, in the other limo."
"The Duesenberg Town Car."
"Whatever. Don't interrupt, please. When the brides are out of the way, Joss can drive to the church on her bike…"
"Triumph Bonneville bobber…"
Aunt Zita glared at Uncle Slim, and proceeded to speak over his words.
"We can then all go out to the vintage bus and board. Now, three things about that: first, it is, as you can all see, a double decker. All of you that can, please sit on the top floor, and leave the lower deck to any that may have difficulties with the stairs. Okay?
"Second, it is imported from England and made for driving on the left side of the road. So, the doors open on the wrong side, out into the traffic. So pay attention when leaving the bus, please!
"And third, there aren't actually any back doors, just an open platform. So don't walk around in the bus but sit down properly so that nobody falls off. Clear?"
Uncle Slim grabbed his brother's arm to get his attention and mumbled, "It is an AEC Routemaster in London Transport red." Zita heard him and gave him the evil eye.
"And it's more than fifty years old, so don't complain about any lack of comfort or anything. Mr. Lipsky loves it and would be very upset.
"So, we board the bus and go to the Middleton Plaza to pick up Shelley's brothers, parents and relatives. Then we go to the church.
"There is a reception room in the building beside the church where we can all wait for the ceremony. There will be some snacks and something to drink while you wait." She looked especially at Stacey and Kelley. "Please note that you can't go to the bathroom once the wedding starts, so don't eat or drink too much.
"Now, last thing. You may meet some people at the wedding that you don't actually know, but you may recognize. To be absolutely frank, some of these may have a shady past or even outstanding warrants for their arrest. But don't worry. They are friends of Kimberly and Shelley back from the crime-fighting days, and they are there under truce. The GJ knows about it and it's okay. Dr. Director herself will attend, so everything is under control. But – and this is important – do not call the police or try to make a citizens arrest or anything! That would be a very, very bad idea that could really ruin the day for Kimberly and Shelley. Are we clear?"
The adults all nodded and agreed, even if some of them looked a little doubtful.
Kelley and Stacey thought it was ever so exciting. Some real villains attending their mothers' wedding was just what the party needed, in their opinion. Things were looking up.
—
Sorry for the wait. Here is finally chapter 4. The wedding itself is approaching, and perhaps some drama.
The wait is partly due to my starting a fanart project, illstrating a scene from chapter 3. Keep watch on my deviant-art pages and it will appear! I will give you the link when it's up!
/Feudor