(Thanks for reading! I'm so surprised how many people are reading guys are all awesome. Anyway, ok. I hope it doesn't seem too slow, but things will get a little more interesting here shortly. More characters you know and love/hate! )
Almost a year passed in the Circle tower and Marian and Anders had built quite the friendship. He was always being watched closely by the templars since he had tried to escape so many times, but it didn't bother Marian in the least. She quite enjoyed hearing his tales of escaping, which ranged from making a break for it during swimming lessons to charming over a female templar who helped him. Anders tried not to talk about his last escape attempt which landed him in solitary confinement for a year. He always got a kind of haunted look on his face when he talked about it so Marian was always quick to change the subject.
They had swapped life stories (for the most part) and it had taken all the power Anders had had to finally get Marian's story of how she got into the Circle from her. She had refused to go into detail about that horrible night in the cell with the templar so long ago, but it hadn't been hard for Anders to guess what had happened. Anders hated the Circle and the templars far more than even Marian did, so they made a good pair together.
Anders was always laughing, always joking and it did Marian's heart good being around him. His rambunctious attitude even made Marian a little bit more open with the other mages and she started to make friends other than Anders as well. There was Jowan, a clumsy mage who didn't seem like he would ever come into his gift; Niall, a somewhat older mage who preferred to spend most of his time by himself (an isolationist, he called himself); and then there was the human mage, Solona. When Marian had first been introduced to Solona she had been shocked to find that Solona's last name was Amell, which was Marian's mother's maiden name. Were they related? Was it possible that Solona was her cousin? Marian's mother hadn't talked much about her side of the family; they had wanted nothing to do with them when her mother ran off with her father.
Marian wanted so desperately to ask Solona about her family but she was afraid to attract attention to who she really was and Solona seemed very loyal to the Circle; in fact, she seemed to be one of the favorites both with the senior enchanters and even the templars. Solona even appeared to have made friends with the templar Cullen. Her and Marian would sometimes sit and gossip over the gentle and handsome templar, and they had quite a bit of fun talking about him when he was within earshot, just so that they could see him blush and pretend not to have heard them.
Marian was afraid that if she told Solona that she was indeed a Hawke, then word might get out and the templars would bring her in for questioning. Marian's father was, after all, a wanted apostate that the Circle assumed was still alive and on the run, and she didn't want to risk her family being hunted.
As much as the friends had helped, Marian still couldn't fit in the Circle. Where her friends and most the other mages were perfectly content in their confinement, Marian still felt suffocated. The eyes of the templars weighed down on her shoulders with more force every day, it seemed, and the idea of missing her two younger siblings growing older made her lie awake at night wondering how they were faring without her.
It was late one night and a storm was wracking the tower; thunder echoed down the corridors and it seemed as if the whole tower was waving in the wind. Marian was sitting in a dark corner with a light wisp bobbing over her journal so she could see. Her head was resting in her hands, propped up on the table, as a few quiet tears streamed down her face and dripped onto the paper with a soft "blip".
It's been so long...too long. If I could just see them one more time...she thought to herself, her heart wrenching in her chest. Being around Solona had made Marian miss her family even more, because Solona was so similar to her sister Bethany. It was nice having a friend but she just wasn't the same as Bethany, and it nagged at Marian every day that she couldn't ask Solona about her family.
A silent sob wracked Marian's body and she slammed her hands down on the table. It was cold in the tower because of the storm and suddenly there were warm hands on hers.
"Hey, Mar? What's wrong?" she heard Ander's say. Marian shook her head, unable to speak, and instantly she felt his strong yet gentle arms pull her in to a hug.
"Hey, hey, it's ok..." Ander's soothed, softly rocking her back and forth and she sobbed into his chest.
"I miss my family...I never wanted to be here, I just want out! I'm t-tired of hiding, I'm tired of pretending I'm s-someone I'm not!' Marian stuttered, her breath coming in gasps. She felt like all the pain and anger over the last few years was trying to batter its way out of her and she could only let it flow. Anders continued to hold her and rock her, muttering soothing words as she cried and shook against him.
When the tears finally stopped and Marian was able to breathe again, she pulled away from Anders and wiped her face self-consciously.
"Um...I'm sorry, Anders. I don't know what came over me," she tried to chuckle as she looked up at him. She could see worry and sadness in his eyes as he sat across from her. A templar marched past them and it was quiet for a moment as they watched him go.
"Thank you," Marian said, sighing, and Anders gave her one of his best smiles.
"That's what I'm here for, my lady! I'm always willing to let beautiful women cry themselves out on my chest; besides, it conserves body heat," he joked and Marian laughed softly. Anders smile slowly slipped from his face as he looked at her seriously.
"What are you hiding?" Anders asked her, and Marian felt her control slipping as she looked into his eyes. After a moment she took a deep breath.
"My name isn't Marie; it's Marian. Marian Hawke. My mother's name is Amell," she explained quietly, looking around for anyone that might hear; there wasn't anyone close enough. Anders' eyebrows raised as he listened to her. "One of the mages, Solona, in this tower, is actually my cousin. But the entire time I've been here I have been hiding who I am, because I'm afraid that if the templars find out my real name they will try and pry information as to my family's whereabouts out of me. My father is a wanted apostate and escape from the circle in the Free Marches."
It felt so good to get the weight off of her chest and she sagged slightly when she finished talking. Anders and Marian simply stared at each other for a while and Marian began to worry that maybe Anders would be upset that she lied to him. She saw pity, worry, anger, and sadness flash through his eyes. But suddenly Anders broke into a sly grin and he slapped the table with a hand.
"Ha! I knew there was something off about you! I'm glad it was something simple and not, you know, something like 'Oh, I'm secretly an abomination!' or 'I like to slaughter kittens with my bare hands!' " he laughed, leaning back in his chair. Marian couldn't help but burst into laughter and they both laughed for a minute.
Anders suddenly leaned forward, his eyes bright with determination, so Marian leaned forward as well.
"What if I told you that I could get us out of here?" he whispered fiercely and Marian's eyes widened in shock.
"But how? The templars keep such a close watch, and the only physical way out is to jump out of the tower," Marian responded, shaking her head.
Anders looked around and leaned even closer. "There are ways; I have found them. I can't say more for both of our safety, but what if I could help you escape too?"
Marian stared at his fierce determination with a feeling of sadness. "Anders...you know I want out of here, so desperately. But look how many times you've escaped, and they've caught you every time. You have no family to protect, but I do. I...I can't risk them finding out about my family."
Anders sat back, his eyes filled with...anger? Sadness? "Please, Marian. I promise I know a way. I can help you," he pleaded with her.
Marian rubbed her hand over her face as she looked at him before she shook her head sadly.
"I'm sorry, Anders. I can't bring the wrath of the templars down on my family," she whispered, looking down at the table.
It was quiet for a moment and Anders sighed. He stood suddenly and walked over to her.
"Well my dear lady Marian...it has truly been an honor knowing you," he said sadly as he leaned down towards her. "I truly hope we meet again."
"Wha-" Marian began but suddenly Anders had leaned down and pressed his soft lips to hers, his hand gripping the hair at the back of her neck. His strong, musky scent washed over her and her eyes closed as she lost herself to the kiss. In an instant it was over and Anders was walking away; Marian sat dumbfounded in her chair, her fingers tracing her lips where they tingled from his touch.
What was THAT all about? she wondered to herself, shaking her head to try and clear the fog that had settled. But then again, over the past year Marian had witnessed that Anders was somewhat of a ladies' man, so it shouldn't have come as such a surprise.
Actually, I should be surprised he didn't try that sooner she laughed to herself as she continued writing in her journal.
It was a few days after that kiss that Anders disappeared completely. At first Marian wondered if maybe he was just too busy; the tower was a large place, after all, and it was easy to go days without seeing someone. But when a few weeks passed and there was still no sign of him, Marian began to get uneasy. Had he tried to escape again? Had the templars finally decided he was too much trouble and made him tranquil? Or...killed him? As time went by her thoughts became more and more farfetched until she was just a balled up knot of worry.
None of the other Mages seemed to have know where he went; most of them didn't even know who Anders was. Jowan was too busy worrying about his own problems, the First Enchanter refused to talk about it, Solona was busy training because she thought anytime she would be called for her Harrowing, and Marian didn't dare ask the templars because they would probably throw her in a cell just for asking.
Wait...there's one who won't ! The realization hit her and she scrambled down the hallway at a brisk pace, searching the templars for the one she wanted. It seemed like every templar had their helmet on today! Finally, outside one of the libraries that Marian usually frequented, she found him, and Cullen straightened as she approached.
"Good day," Cullen said, bowing his head just slightly to her.
"Hello, Cullen," Marian asked, suddenly feeling slightly bashful. She had never known how to address Cullen, since he was the only nice templar in the blasted place. "Um..I have a question I'd like to ask..."
Cullen looked at her questioningly, so Marian continued.
"I was wondering if...well, if you maybe knew...one of the other mages, his name is Anders, he went missing."
Cullen's face twitched lightly and he let out a small huff of air.
"I am not very familiar with that particular mage. And besides, you know I am not at liberty to tell you things like that," he answered, scratching the back of his head nervously.
Marian put her hands behind her back and scuffed the floor with the tip of her shoe.
"Can't you at least tell me where he is? If he is ok? If he's...been made tranquil, or...if he's dead?" she pleaded and when she looked back up at him, she saw Cullen looking at her with an exasperated look. After a moment he cleared his throat as another templar walked by.
"I'm sorry, but I cannot divulge that kind of information," he said firmly, and Marian nodded. She had hoped that maybe Cullen would let at least something slip, but she shouldn't have. He had to do his job, after all. As Marian began to walk away she heard Cullen swear lightly under his breath.
"Marian?" he called out and she turned back to look at him in shock. How does he know my real name? she thought to herself and her mind reeled back through her memories, trying to figure out when he could have eavesdropped on her. The only person she had ever told was Anders.
"Mages occasionally find ways out of the tower. The templars are then forced to hunt them down, for their safety and for the safety of others. But I personally wouldn't think that your mage friend is dead," Cullen stated and he raised his eyebrows as he looked at her, as if trying to get a message across.
Marian smiled and mouthed "thank you" and Cullen gave her a breathtaking smile of his own. The weight of stress and worry on her chest was replaced with hurt as she realized that Anders had escaped. She realization that his offer may have been her only chance to escape as well, and she had passed it up.
I guess, no matter what everyone says, there are good templars every now and then, she thought with a smile as she walked away.
(Ok, the next few chapters might be a little bit of time in waiting. It's hunting season! :-D So I'll work on them when I have time!)