Brittany scurries through the near empty hallways of WMHS eager to get to her first glee club meeting. After her audition early that day, she couldn't wait to get in there and sing again. She makes her way down the familiar hallway and again is bombarded with the sounds of music floating through the halls and invading her ears. She comes to a slow halt and just listens. She must have been running late, it took her longer than anyone in her class to finish the test she just had, but she felt confident about her score. She doesn't mind being late though; the sound of the music playing cheerfully was the most welcoming invitation. She thinks about being late every time just so she doesn't have to wait in the room for the music to start. She wonders how awkward that must be, sitting with people she barely knows, just waiting to start doing the one thing that made her want to be a part of this club to begin with.
Then her thoughts travel to her best friend, Quinn, and she remembers the other reason she joined the club. She suddenly feels a twinge of guilt for taking so long on her test and just standing in the hallway, making her friend wait through the awkwardness alone. The tall blonde quickly moves her feet again, this time in a quick skip towards the open choir room.
When she reaches the door she spots Quinn at the top row of seats giving Rachel, who is singing, her dirtiest look. Brittany walks in and pumps her fist in the air to the song that Rachel was singing with the utmost conviction. She thinks it's silly that this strange girl is almost in tears singing such an upbeat song like, "Gives You Hell." There seems to be that tension in the room again, not as bad as before, but Brittany doesn't like it one bit. She starts moving her body before her brain can let her know it might be inappropriate and starts dancing like a fool behind Rachel.
The room erupts into simultaneous laughter, making the light hearted blonde feel proud of herself...until Rachel turns around and gives her a look she can't really decipher. It was a mix between a scowl, confusion, hurt and annoyance. She looks at Rachel and reaches out her arms, trying to get the annoyed brunette to dance with her. Rachel looks between Brittany, Quinn, Finn, and lastly the head bopping glee club teacher, flinging her arms in the air and ending her song.
"Mr. Shue! How am I to be taken seriously as a performer with this sort of mockery and total lack of respect from my peers?" Her tone is whiny and loud, making Brittany shudder and quickly take the empty seat next to Quinn.
"Sorry, I was just trying to liven things up. That song is fun." Brittany tries to keep her tone light, even though she's slightly confused about the need for defending her actions. Besides Quinn giving her a quick toothy smile everyone ignores her.
The rest of her time in glee that day goes by pretty hazy. No one really took the time to catch her up on anything that was going on, because they were all wrapped up in talking about themselves and what they should sing for their third song at Nationals. Kurt and Mercedes sing two songs that Brittany finds too forced, like no one in the club knows how to have fun. She pretty much just watches and listens to everyone. She takes notice of the looks that are passed between Rachel and Finn, and nudges her best friend occasionally to let her know they should be glaring at Rachel. Her and Quinn are in the middle of burning holes through the back of Rachel's head when Mr. Shue announces their newest project for the week.
"Duets! I want you all to pair up and come up with a love song to sing together."
Brittany feels a tap on her arm and comes face to face with a cocky looking Puck.
"You. Me." He points between the two of them. "Hottest love song ever, baby. What'd ya say?" Puck wiggles his eyebrows and smirks.
"Okay. Sure." Brittany accepts with a shy smile. He kisses the air between them and hops over a chair, exiting the room with the rest of the glee club. Brittany must have spaced out again because before she knows it Quinn is pulling her out of her chair and talking to her.
"So I'm thinking you could come over my place and we could come up with ways to sneak into Rachel's house and shave off one of her eyebrows." Quinn suggests as she leads them both out of the choir room.
"Can't. I promised my parents I would be home for dinner tonight, because I forgot yesterday."
"Okay. Well I'll see you tomorrow then?" Quinn asks her rhetorically but still receives, an "of course" from Brittany, before they both go their separate ways in the parking lot.
Brittany gets home and as soon as she opens the door leading into the kitchen her mouth begins to water. The savory smell of her mother's homemade chicken and dumplings fills the house.
"MMM momma. Smells delicious." Brittany appraises her mother who is trying to pop open the biscuits. She slyly starts to stick her hand into the crock-pot before getting shooed away.
"Uh-uh missy. It won't be ready for another couple of hours." Maggie receives a pout from her daughter and continues. "So tell me all about this glee club you auditioned for."
Brittany instantly perks up.
"Oh mom, it was so so so much fun! I got to sing "Single Ladies" with Quinn, and they totally thought we were the greatest things since sliced bacon. The class was cool, they all sing a lot, and I can't wait to sing and dance at Nationals." Brittany brings her hands up into the air to emphasize her excitement. "Nationals, mom! They compete against other schools in the WHOLE nation! Isn't that awesome?"
"That sounds great, honey." Maggie simply states, still struggling with the tube of biscuits. Just then Brittany's dad, Harold, walks into the kitchen and watches his bent over and frustrated wife in amusement.
"Let me get that for ya, hun." He easily pops open the biscuits and looks over to his daughter, who is seemingly day dreaming about something good. "Hey pumpkin, why don't you go get your homework done before dinner?"
Brittany slumps her shoulders, slides out of her stool and heads upstairs to her room. She plops down onto her bright yellow comforter, turns on her stereo and presses play letting the calming music of a few of Santana Lopez's slower songs from her album, Bubbles and Buttercups, fill up her room. She was glad to have found them on itunes yesterday, afraid she would break the other song from listening to it too much. With the music loosening her up she finally opens up her history book and her notebook and begins jotting down things for her test, with the occasional doodle of Stalin or Hitler mixed in.
Unfortunately for her academics, she finds the soothing raspy voice of her favorite pop star starts putting weight on her eyelids as she slowly to nods off.
Santa Fe, New Mexico. Spring 2006
The blurry-faced girl and I are walking through my neighborhood in Santa Fe. It's getting late and the sun is starting to go to sleep, giving the sky its final glory moments of pinks and oranges. I know I haven't seen her all day and have the feeling that I missed her. I look over at the girl on my right, who is already peering at me with a sneaky smile on her face.
"What?" I ask her casually. Somehow I know the look, it means she wants to do something stupid and is going to drag me into it.
"I wanna do something…dangerous."
I scoff at her and roll my eyes, before her hand accidentally grazes mine and my heart does a tiny flutter.
"I'm serious."
"I don't want to do anything bad."
She looks away for a second with a frown. Before I can suggest we just head back home she is already starting to talk.
"It doesn't have to be bad…we can do something good and dangerous."
"Like what?" I ask doubtfully.
"Well, I know how much you hate seeing those poor puppies stuck in cages at the pet store down the street…"
"WE CAN RESCUE THE PUPPIES!" I'm completely into the idea now and she knows she got her way. She takes my hand and guides me along the few blocks it takes us to get to the pet store. When we get there she drops my hand and I automatically miss the warmth that's now missing there, so I replace her hand with my own. It's not the same though.
"Great, it says they closed about an hour ago. We're gonna hafta sneak through the back." The shorter girl says as she reads the 'Hours of Operations' on the front of the door.
"Awe, I don't know. That's a lot of trouble. I don't want to go to jail and get addicted to drugs."
"Britt, they go to jail BECAUSE they are addicted to drugs. And it's cool, it'll be just like when I sneak into your room at night. We'll be super quiet and not get caught."
I'm reluctant but follow her behind the building. The pet shop is on the end of a strip of stores in the shopping center. The door is closed and I just know it's locked, but the girl opens it. I take a closer look and notice that the deadbolt has been taped shut, keeping it from locking. I cock my head to the side and narrow my eyes at her.
"You planned this whole thing, didn't you?"
She tries to feign innocence, but her eyes sparkle with both pride and guilt.
"Well, last time you saw the little Yorkie crying it made you so sad. I knew you wanted them to be free…"
"…free like the squirrels, because they never cry." I finish my sentence from yesterday. "I can't believe you did this for me and the puppies. I'm glad you're my best friend."
I wrap my arms around her and squeeze tight. When I let go and look back at her, her eyes look brighter some how.
"Of course, now lets go rescue them doggies!"
The minute we step through the door and into a small room filled with cages, a bathtub, and tubs of dog food, an alarm starts screaming at us. We immediately squeal in surprise and look around, trying to find a way to make it turn off.
Time jumps to five minutes later without my permission, and now we can hear a door jingle open and male voices coming from the front end of the store.
"Crap, the po-po!" my best friend whispers into my ear, sending shivers down my arm as she scoots me into a corner that the bathtub and some boxes were blocking. I almost slipped on some left over suds and we both started giggling quietly.
"Shhh. You're gonna get us caught, you klutz." She says to me, her mouth hovering over my ear as she pokes my side, eliciting another giggle from me. Both from the tickle in my side and the hot breath on my ear.
"You know I can't control myself around you!" I whisper into her ear and see the same shudder move through her body. "This is your fault, you know? It always is."
She looks at me and lets out a muted laugh. I give her a pointed glare and she quickly clasps her hand over her mouth.
"You know I have no control when I'm with you either. This was all for you after all."
I open my mouth to retort, but just then we hear the voices getting louder and start walking into the room we were in.
"I don't see anything, Sir, and there is no sign of forced entry. Maybe one of these rascals knocked something over?" I think he's talking about the puppies, but I slink back further into the corner and hold on tight to the girl hiding away with me, just incase they saw us. She squeezes me back just as tightly but she doesn't seem as scared as I am, and it reassures me.
"Yeah. You're probably right officer. Thank you."
And then they are walking out and I can finally breath again. We emerge from the corner and leave the store in a rush. The puppies will have to be set free another day. When we get outside its really dark and I pull my friend close to me for protection. She turns to look at me, squinting to see my face. I still can't see hers over all the blurriness.
"Brittany?" she calls my name so softly.
"Yeah?"
"So you know back there, when we were talking about feeling out of control around each other? Well, I really mean it." She takes her time saying this, like she's still trying to work out the thoughts in her mind and turn them into words. I try to ease what ever this nervousness is that she's feeling.
"Me too. I would ride a dinosaur if you asked me too."
She looks at me, her eyes telling me she's grateful for my absurdity but still serious. It's as if she's thinking about things she's never had to think about before. She smiles and quicker than I can blink she's giving my lips a quick peck. My knees wobble a little, but it doesn't feel that out of the ordinary. It felt sort of normal actually, like this isn't the first time its ever happened.
"Yeah, I mean you make me want to do crazy things when ever you ask. But it's more than that." She pauses to gather her thoughts and continues. "Sometimes I think you control my brain, when I'm with you I think about things I don't normally think about...and my heart, it beats super fast when I'm with you...and my stomach, it hurts sometimes when I worry about you...sometimes my legs, they feel like jell-o sometimes, like now kinda and when I-." She cuts herself off and presses a kiss to my cheek. She pulls back and narrows her eyes, then leans in and kisses my other cheek. She looks like she's searching for something, until she reaches her mouth out and kisses my lips again. She stays there a little longer than normal but its still a short kiss. "There, my legs feel like jell-o now. And my lips are all tingling. Really it's my whole body, because it always just wants to be around you. Is this making any sense?"
I don't know what to say to her, my knees feel like they lost all their strength and my head is swimming, I feel like I'm floating. Her new admission has totally caught me off guard. I don't know what else to do so I ease myself further into her arms, pull her into a hug and place a small kiss on her neck.
"I feel a hundred and one things when I'm with you that I don't think will ever make sense."
Brittany wakes up, her head still buzzing from the emotions of her dream. She looks at her reflection and sees her cheeks are a darker shade of red than they usually are. She still doesn't understand why these recent dreams feel so real, and she really wants to see that girl's face. She tries to shake off the feeling and looks over at her stereo, that's still singing Santana Lopez to her. The groggy blonde then looks at her unfinished homework and groans.
There's a light tapping on the door before it squeaks open.
"Britt, sweat heart, did you hear me? Dinner is ready." Her mom says as she peaks her head into the room.
"Oops. It smells even better than it did when I fell asleep!" Brittany jumps out of her bed and shuts off her music. "Yummmmyyy" She exclaims and is out the door and down the stairs before he mother even makes it half way down.
"Ahh, Britt. Careful, bug. Come sit down at the dinner table." Harold motions his arm for her to come eat.
She gladly takes her usual seat on the side of the table while Maggie sits at the head of the table, opposite Harold. They chit chat about their day as they gobble down their chicken and dumplings, before her dad gets to the real reason she couldn't go over to Quinn's house and plot evil things to do to Rachel Berry.
"So Brittany, the reason we wanted you home for dinner was to discuss this weekend."
Brittany takes a gulp of her water.
"What about it?"
"As you know, your Aunt Pattie runs our office in Tennessee."
The blonde nods her head and takes another bite of her food.
"Well, there is an event going on in Memphis this weekend to support gay and lesbian youth in schools. Not just any schools but they are actually fighting for tolerance in our Christian schools. This being completely against the word of God and our ministry we are going to be there to protest their ridiculous demands."
Harold worked at a place called Love in Action. It was a ministry to turn gay people straight, or as he liked to say, "being discipleships to reform those with ungodly sexual desires". Brittany has never really understood her father's line of work or why he has to state exactly what it stands for almost any time he mentions it. Why should anyone care who people love? Who people love doesn't affect or hurt her and Kurt Hummel doesn't seem demon like at all. She just never got why it was such a big deal. She honestly thought her dad was just being too nosy.
"What does that have to do with me?"
"Well you and your mother are coming to accompany me. We could use all the support we could get." He clears his throat. "Plus it will be a nice get a way for the weekend." He adds.
"I don't really wanna go, dad. I have Cheerioes and the new glee club thing now. I don't have time to be God's worker this weekend. And last time I held onto one of those stupid signs I got a splinter."
"It's not up for discussion, Brittany. Our flight leaves Friday at 6pm." Her dad states firmly as he wipes his mouth with a napkin.
"fine" Brittany mumbles dejected.
On The Road Towards Memphis. Present Day.
Santana is leaning her head against the window of her tour bus, listening to her own lyrics being sung to her through her head phones. She's near the back of the bus and singing along silently with herself to keep the songs fresh in her mind.
Raindrops are collecting on the windows, only to slide away when the wind hits them at just the right speed and angle. Santana closes one of her eyes and peeks through a larger raindrop that has managed to stay on the window she's leaning against. She peers through it and sees the world zipping past her distorted. All the trees are upside down and go from smaller to larger depending on how her head slightly bumps along the window.
The pop star picks her ipod off of her lap and scrolls through her playlists before settling on the one titled, 'better days'. She skips forward through the shuffled songs and lands on the one she was thinking about: "Ironic" by Alanis Morsette. The song has no real meaning to her, other than it was one her and Brittany had remembered every word to and sang obnoxiously loud on the way to Santana's Abuela's house one summer.
Driving through Las Cruces, Summer 2005
A young blonde and brunette sat in the back of a black Range Rover, heading to Sierra Vista, Arizona, a city not far from Tucson. It was the middle of July and pouring down rain. Their drive to Santana's grandmother's house was extended by at least a day because of the passing monsoon, and the 2 young girls who sat in the back playing cards were getting restless.
"I don't wanna play Crazy Eights any more, Santana, you always beat me." The little blonde said with a pout as she pushed her nose against the glass of the window next to her.
"That's because you never use your eights the right way." Santana stated matter-of-factly as she gathered up the cards Brittany had just dropped. She looked up at the sore loser and scrunched her face at what she was witnessing.
Her friend was smushing her face to window with one eye closed and a dopey grin on her face.
"What in the heck are you doing Britt?" She asked as she leaned over to Brittany's side of the seat. She situated her self against the blonde's back and placed her chin on a boney shoulder, trying to see what she was seeing.
"Everything looks so weird. Look." Brittany leaned away from the window and was nose to nose with a confused Santana when she spoke. "If you get real close and look into the raindrop, the world looks so different. Like you get to see something no else does. It's like a secret world, San."
The way Brittany spoke, eye to eye with Santana, and with so much awe in her voice, like she really just discovered something new, made Santana instantly offer up a warm smile. She gave her pale cheek a quick peck and shook her head.
"It just makes me have to pee." With that sudden realization Santana turned her attention to the front of the car where both her mother and father sat in silence. Santana's father was rarely around, and when he was he never looked very happy. He and her mother didn't talk much when he was around either. Santana thought that's how all parents were until she saw how her Aunt and Uncle were with each other. Her aunt never yelled at her Uncle about being off with some "dirty 2 dollar hoe" either, whatever that meant. Luckily Santana never really had to hear the fighting because the few times her Dad was home he tried really hard to be a nice father, where he failed as a husband.
"Mami, Papi! I gots ta pee!" Santana wailed out as she threw herself up against the back of her father's seat and wrapped her arms around the head rest, tickling his neck to get his attention.
"There's a rest stop in a couple of miles. Now get back in your seat before you go flying up in the air from a bump in the road." Victor warned with a glint.
"But I have to go nowww." She whined over dramatically.
"Why don't we put some music on for you two, to get your mind off of it. Anything in particular you want to listen to mija?" Gloria asked seeing the slow frustration making its way to her husbands face. He would give his baby girl anything she wanted, but the consequences of being an absentee father meant he had no idea how to handle her.
Brittany and Santana exchanged a glance before they both sang in unison.
"ISN'T IT IRONIC, DON'T YA THINK?"
They both giggled and waited for Santana's mother to put in their favorite song. Neither knew why it was their favorite, but they could sing it for days. Gloria gave herself a satisfied grin while she pressed play. She looked over to Victor who was smiling at her with a small beam of pride. He reached his hand over the middle console, placed it over his wife's and gave it a subtle squeeze.
Santana saw this and widened her eyes before she took Brittany's hand in her own and placed it in her lap, tapping it along with the music. She was so happy to be stuck in this rain with her favorite people in the world.
The song ends and the older brunette slips her head to the other side of the seat until she is slowly sliding down and laying on her side. A salty tear falls from her eye to the floorboard beneath the small couch. This time not out of missing Brittany, but at the memory of her parents, and herself, content as could be.
Those memories were few and far between and ended shortly after that summer when her dad walked out on them. He left her mother for a slew of younger girls he had promised the world to. He stayed in Santa Fe, though, making it easier for his daughter to visit him. She still has to remind herself that he wasn't a bad dad, just a shitty husband. But the fact that he was still so detached from all the things that came with having a family made it hard for her. The visits to his house went from being every weekend, to once every other Wednesday, to whenever either of them made the time to see each other.
She'll admit that around that time she was getting even more wrapped up in being attached to Brittany's hip, but he must have had his own adorable blonde because his efforts were as miniscule as her own.
She wonders if she'll go and visit him when she sees her mother after her gig in Memphis. He has tried to get a hold of her a few times. He even used his connections one time to send her flowers after a show she did a few months back. She tries to contemplate it, but she can't seem to think too much further ahead than her busy weekend in the Bluff City. Hoping she'll get a chance to see Graceland and walk in the footsteps of Elvis, which she told her manager a hundred times she wanted to do. She wants to wander down the alleyways of Beale Street and picture the likes of B.B. King and Ike turner playing their music in one of the local recording studios. She always has a certain hint of fervor when she's on the road bound to a new city, but she has a feeling this one is going to be pretty special.
A/N: Thanks for reading and reviewing! Again, if anyone knows of a beta pm me =)