4

Fighting to Survive

Emily gasped as the paramedics began to work on JJ in the lifesaver helicopter. It was the fastest way to get JJ to the hospital considering the ten mile hike it took to get to her in the first place. Hotch had allowed Emily to go with JJ, knowing the blonde might need a friendly face.

Emily was beginning to regret the decision. The medics had removed the blanket from JJ briefly to get a warming blanket on her. In that brief moment, Emily saw more of JJ's injuries. She couldn't tell what the various marks were from. Some looked like burns, some like bites. Emily swallowed the bile that had risen in her mouth. JJ was screaming out. She was fighting the medics. Emily knew she was fighting off whatever attacker was in her memory.

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Lights faded in and out, somewhere very close there were the sounds of sirens. She could hear Emily's voice begging her to hang on. In the midst of chaos, JJ found no solace. Her body burned in all the places the unsub's touch had invaded her. Her ears rang with the wicked words he whispered. Her eyes, when open, confused kind faces with that of a monster.

She could hear different sounds. She tried to stay in the present listening to various sounds from machines. She heard something about hypothermia. JJ felt terrified with all the different hands on her body and yet relieved when she felt something warm crawl up the vein of her arm.

Through tearful eyes she looked up and saw Emily's saddened expression peering back at her. And with that she was out again.

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Penelope Garcia was the first to approach Emily as she came out of the ER exam room.

"What's going on?" Garcia asked, her fear evident in her tone.

Emily sat down in a plastic chair in the hall twenty feet from JJ's room. She sighed and rubbed her shaky hands across her face. She gratefully accepted the cup of coffee Garcia handed her. It was their first real contact since she had come back from the dead.

Emily looked up into worried eyes. In her peripheral she could see the rest of the team approaching. Garcia saw them as well and waited as patiently as possible for them to all gather so Emily wouldn't have to repeat anything.

Emily exhaled slowly and looked up at the team, "She's okay. She's stable. Hypothermia was setting in but we got to her in time. She's had some blood loss and…"

Derek placed a gentle hand on Emily's shoulder. He had seen the panic-stricken look on the brunette's face when they had pulled JJ out of the hole in the ground. His voice was calm, "Take your time."

Emily thought about the distant look in JJ's eyes as she had succumbed to the drugs the ER doctor had given her. She had been back there, in that cabin. The fear, the loss…Emily had never seen anything so heartbreaking.

"She's…she's going to need…" Emily suppressed the sob she could feel rising in her throat. "She's going to need time. And…someone to…"

"Whatever she needs, we'll get it for her," Hotch promised.

The only one to not verbally agree was Reid. Emily studied him intently and couldn't read what was on his face. She shook her head and allowed Penelope to hold her hand. The comfort felt good, and yet she felt guilty knowing that JJ would probably not feel comfortable for a long time.

She stood to pace when the doctor approached, "Are you Jennifer's family?"

Emily nodded, "We're her…yes. We're family."

Hotch interrupted and shook the doctor's hand, "I'm Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner. Agent Jareau is a vital part of my team and we're the only family she has. Is she going to be okay."

The doctor understood protocol, theirs and his and chose to ignore his, "Ms. Jareau is lucky you found her when you did. Hypothermia was setting in and her body temperature was already several degrees too low. We've had to stitch up several cuts including her right shoulder, the palm of her left hands, and a rather deep gash under her…"

He paused not really sure he should be divulging any of this information to them. Urged on by Emily's gaze he sighed, "A deep gash under her right breast."

Hotch didn't want to picture their JJ in dire straits, so he continued to look at this as a case, merely a case, "Were there any bite marks and if so were there any dental impressions made from them?"

The doctor nodded, "There were some imprints on her body, but we haven't done any exams or impressions yet. We thought we'd let Ms. Jareau…"

Hotch hated to have to do this but time was of the essence, "As soon as JJ is awake, we need this evidence. Understood?"

The doctor felt compelled to argue on behalf of his patient, "Sir I don't think you understand the trauma…"

"And you don't understand that we have a case to solve and now that he's attacked my agent, I'm more ready than ever to get this son of a bitch. I think JJ would agree."

Emily and Garcia were looking at Hotch with disdain. It was Garcia who stood up and spoke freely, "Sir, you can't possibly think that JJ would want to be invaded all over again just because you said so."

Hotch blushed and nodded, "I understand you want to protect JJ right now, Garcia, but we need to find this unsub before he hurts another woman, or worse, comes after JJ again."

He pulled Morgan, Reid and Rossi away from Emily and Garcia, "You three come with me. And you, Emily and Garcia, stay here with JJ. When she wakes, you make sure the evidence is taken."

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JJcouldseetheobjectinhishand.Shecouldtellbythesadisticlookonhisfaceexactlywhatheintendedtodowithit.Shepulledagainsttherestraintsonherwrists.Shewastiedtothebed.Herscreamsgrewlouderwitheverystephetooktowardher.

Emily smoothed JJ's blonde locks down as the young woman shivered in the bed. Garcia, who had been standing by the window, wiped a few stray tears from her cheeks and moved to JJ's side as well.

"She's dreaming," Emily stated.

Penelope nodded sadly, "I don't think I want to know."

Emily couldn't hold the tears back, "Oh god, Pen…what are we going to do? I saw the things in the files. All those things he could do to her, and has done to her…how do we help her?"

Garcia placed her hands on top of Emily's and squeezed it gently, "We will listen. We will be there. And when it's too hard to hear what she went through, we'll listen anyway. We love her, and that's what friends do."

Emily laid her forehead on JJ's bed feeling the trembling of the woman lying there.

Thepain,shesearingpain.JJtriedtorememberherreasonsforliving.Shecouldn'tbeartothinkaboutHenry.Thethoughtofsuchabeautifulinnocentchildduringsuchadisgustingtime,itwasn'tright.Shecouldn'tthinkofanythingtosaveher.Hermindkeptflashingbacktothedeadgirlstillonthetable.Herbodylongdrainedofherblood.JJrememberedherhandsontheknifeasithadslashedintothewoman.

JJ felt the cold steel against her flat stomach. She fought. She would not lose her mind. She would not lose her soul.

Emily wiped her eyes and slipped her hand back into JJ's. The blue tint from the hypothermia was replaced now with a paleness. Bruises on JJ's forehead, cheekbone, and neck were beginning to grow darker. With a glance at the clock on the wall, Emily knew they had been waiting for an hour for JJ to wake up.

The sun was shining through the window of the room. Garcia was sitting on the other side of JJ's bed with her head resting on the edge, eyes on JJ.

"She's still dreaming," Garcia spoke.

Emily shook her head, "Not dreaming. Remembering. Flashbacks."

Garcia's frown deepened. She didn't want to picture JJ alone with the monster she had read about in their files. She didn't want to know the things he had done to their JJ.

Shewantedtofeelwarmagain.ShewantedtohearlaughterandchatterinthebackgroundwhilesheshotdartsatthebarwithReid.ShewantedtobeathomereadingagoodbookwithHenrysleepingsafelyintheroomnexttohers.

She wanted this monster to stop touching her, to stop making her feel pain. She wanted him to not do anything else to her that was going to leave her scarred and scared for the rest of her life. She looked around the room still desperate for an escape, hoping one had magically appeared since the last time she had looked.

Then he raped her again. This time he had done so with the object he had been holding to her temple just seconds before. Despite the fear, the terror, she didn't want to die, and she knew one wrong move and she could be dead.

JJ shot up in bed, her screams startling Emily and Penelope. Emily quickly sat on the edge of the bed and wrapped her arms around JJ, not sure if that was the right thing to do or not. JJ struggled slightly against Emily, but then stopped and sank into her as though realizing she was safe again.

"Shhhh, JJ, you're safe now. We're here." Emily whispered into JJ's ear. JJ sobbed into Emily's shoulder while reaching out for Penelope's hand. The three of them sat that way for several minutes until JJ felt strong enough to pull away.

When she finally broke away from Emily and slipped her hand out of Penelope's she leaned back against her pillows. She couldn't stop shaking and knew it was from the fear. The memory.

Penelope slid off the bed and tucked stray strands of blonde hair behind JJ's ear. She noticed the dirt smears on JJ's cheek, "I'm going to get the doctor. There's some things he needs to go over with you, and maybe when all that's done they'll let you get a shower, or something."

JJ wasn't sure where to let her eyes settle so she looked at her hands on top of her covers. Penelope exited and Emily turned back to JJ.

"JJ…what…are you.." Emily didn't know what to say.

JJ's voice was soft, whispered, broken, "Em…it…I was…He raped me."

JJ broke down in sobs again and Emily pulled her close. She rubbed her back gently, not sure if there were any injuries there. She held JJ until she could breathe again. JJ didn't want to let go of Emily. The warmth there, the safety, the thought that maybe, just maybe she could survive…JJ needed that so badly.

"Hotch wants you to get the exam done as soon as possible. So we can catch this guy."

JJ stiffened against Emily, "He's still out there?"

Emily frowned, "I thought you knew. Penelope tracked down the cabin. It's how we found you."

JJ jumped as the door opened. Penelope came in followed by the doctor. He had a kind face, but JJ was still afraid. She didn't want to be touched any more. She knew she had to be examined. She knew she had to help her team catch the man responsible, but the fear was overwhelming.

She looked, wide-eyed, at Emily, "Will you stay with me?"

Emily looked at the doctor and he nodded. She turned back to JJ and held her uninjured hand, "I wouldn't think of leaving you for a second."

Penelope watched the two women, and knew that her own unwillingness to forgive had put some distance between herself and the two women. She regretted it and knew she would do whatever it took to make up for it.

The doctor excused himself to go get a nurse and a wheelchair.

"Emily," JJ's voice was still soft, unsteady, "You'll know…you'll hear, during the exam…"

"I can handle whatever I have to, JJ to be there for you."

JJ didn't bother to wipe the tears that fell on her bruised cheek. She breathed steadily and refused to think about the unsub out there, getting ready to snatch another victim.

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He sat in the parking lot his hands gripping the wheel tightly. He looked up at the hospital his teeth grinding together in anger. She was somewhere inside. Somewhere, protected by armed guards. He could still smell her scent on his skin. He knew he would never, could never, stop. Not until he was finished with Jennifer Jareau.