Thanks to all my betas who contributed in different ways: lovingyouisbest, JD Bell; Joy Booth and Fredrica.
Final tweaking is my own.
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any other beta offers will also be considered
Chapter 7: The Aftermath- or Afterglow, Depending on Your Point of View
8:30 am the next morning:
She felt, predictably, like a freight train had run through her and she was hearing nonspecific music that wasn't there, uncertain if it was a hallucination from lack of sleep or ears ringing from last night. Her mouth felt like cotton. But, she mustn't miss the first run through for the first mainstage show she was designing.
She made it to the theatre on time, only because her curls were so crunchy from the night before she didn't have to do much to them. They kindof looked like dreadlock curls. Lizzy hoped they looked intentional…
And, admittedly, she threw on the doily dress from the night before, this time worn as a top, under which she wore a pair of perfectly distressed jeans, along with boots and a blazer. Give me a break, she woke up later than she wanted and couldn't get to her bags.
Lizzy was adequately awake for the ensuing read through thanks to a mocha and being nervous about her first time designing a big production. She stopped for a drink at the water fountain and overheard some snotty voice talking about this being pretty remote culturally. He sounded familiar. She wanted to stay and eavesdrop but was about to be late and so scurried into the conference room. Soon, techies, designers and supporting crew filed in and Lizzy was trying desperately not to show the mortification she felt when the Guest Artists enter and the first person was HIM.
Inevitably introductions got around to her: "Fitzwilliam Darcy, Scenic Artist, meet Costume Designer, Elizabeth Bennet." His face was a mask except for the molten look in his eyes that flickered momentarily when he glanced at her. Lizzy was sure that the deep breath he took was for her benefit. It communicated what Charlotte dared to tease earlier this morning.
Was she that obvious? Was this his acknowledgment of intimacy?She decided to play it up. Arching her brow and smiling, she spoke, "Please, Fitz-william, let's start off less formally- all my friends call me Lizzy. What shall I call you?"
"You can call me anything you like," he responded, "Darcy is the name my friends and colleagues call me, only special people call me Will; whatever fits." an almost smile turning up the corners of his mouth, the familiar glint returning to his eyes as they flitted over her form.
She wondered what that meant exactly. "Well, I suppose as your colleague I should call you Darcy, if someone from so culturally remote a place is worthy to be considered a colleague that is."
He shot a stunned look couldn't formulate a reply as the read through was called to order. She had other things to occupy her attention besides the read through- thoughts tumbled through her now alert mind. She'd expected- counted- the uncertain hours until she would see him when they went on the group date. She admittedly perseverated over all the instances of his superiority complex, the pompous letters, today's overheard comments, last night.
Then came a revelation. Why had she not noticed before? Oh, yeah, maybe it was because she was thinking about how easy she'd been last night and how uneasy that now made her. Now, here Lizzy was and here Jane was and she seemed so familiar interacting with Charles as the meeting was breaking up into separate clumps of people. Or couples, as was the case for Jane and Charles. I'll be damned if they didn't look like they'd been together for more than last night.
Then. It. Clicked.
Lizzy recalled Jane's vague story last night of her recent date with that guy who turned out not to be an internet stalker but a really nice and gorgeous artist. And what else was that about him? With Lizzy's eagerness to get to the club, she hadn't found the time to learn anything else.
Then Lizzy recalled how she thought it odd that shy Jane would introduce 3 strangers in the club last night…Charles going on and on about Jane …Charlotte even seeming more familiar with a strange man than was her wont… Now that she put her previously brushed aside observations together Lizzy made another conclusion entirely, especially in light of her sister's sparse correspondence this summer. Jane had gotten to know Charles at some point this summer- so that was how she was spending her time.
That meant Charles, Richard, and Will knew the three would be there. He must have known who she was to begin with. It made her a little nauseous to realize the ego boost she got from his pretty words and seduction last night. More than that, his looks, his actions made her hopeful, in spite of herself.
She wanted more. Who wouldn't? To call last night a peak experience would be an understatement. To call this situation a nightmare would have been glorifying it. She didn't have time to contemplate it at the moment; she had to focus on design presentations and planning for the show. It was too much. Her mind would not cooperate and it made her head hurt.
Her mind returned to the fact that He was the one Lizzy had been mentally arguing with ever since she saw his maddeningly exquisite sketches that were all wrong for her ideas of this show. They were messing her up. He was messing her up. Did he know? If there was any doubt, about it, that was soon put to rights: Most of the staff was keen on her sketches and ideas at this meeting, but he continually posed challenges throughout the presentation- everyone's, for that matter- except for Bingley's of course! The nerve!
His demeanor was one of meticulous hauteur– just like one of those snotty 'Professionals' from larger Theatre Cities hired for productions every once in awhile. Full of themselves and about where they live. Puts me off of urban living when people act superior about it…Puts me off him altogether.
On and on he questioned: Why had she not sent updated sketches to go with the most recent drawings he and Bingley had emailed? Did she not know they thought about the change in color in Act V? How could I? I was in f*ing WIFI nomansland! HELLO! Didn't he realize I'd been corresponding BY MAIL?
Maeve, thank g*d, jumped in preventing Lizzy from the opportunity of wrecking her career before it started. Lizzy didn't even want to go into what she'd thought of his ideas on the period and regional inspirations which she HAD been able to relate in letters to Maeve- she wondered how much, if any, of her messages Maeve forwarded.
Lizzy could tell by her impish expression and tone that Maeve meant business as she explained the remoteness of Lizzy's summer internship. That woman was entirely too patient with Darcy. She was usually such a good judge of character...
O my g*d! She knew him! How could she forget Maeve's summer work in Santa Fe? It was all Lizzy could do to keep her forehead from meeting the table, repeatedly, in self flagellation. Soon enough her inquisition was over and it moved on to uninteresting matters, such as the actors, giving Lizzy far too much time to think again- her mind found its way to where she'd left off… b*st*rds making sport of our virtues…ah yes…
That such a man could be authentic was impossible. To her sickening dread, Lizzy thought his motivation much more likely to be out of artistic ego than from any true revelation. He clearly thought his origins more worthy than their current surroundings. What if they were just toying with the locals? She pictured a 21st century Valmont* sexploitation and her stomach churned dangerously.
He knew about her before, not because of some artistic precognition but because Charles- maybe even Jane- had told him! She was becoming green with regret as the bile rose within. The regret was particularly… forceful….
With amazing timing the meeting was adjourned at that point. She jumped up before everyone else and ran to the lobby restroom to effectively clear her digestive system of all its contents. Thank G-d she'd made it in time. Even if she felt he deserved her wrath she would not have liked barfing on the man- and it would have been particularly mortifying to have done so in his presence at all. Then he'd know how uneasy she'd become. Lizzy refused to give him that pleasure. Ever.
PPPxNMxPPPxNMxPPPxNM
When she emerged from the restroom, there he was just outside, his expressive eyes upon her. "Lizzy -you left so fast, I was worried. Are you OK? Let me get you something- I have ginger tea…or sports drink you should have something after-"
"After what?" she hissed. "What exactly was last night? What is it you have in mind, REALLY? Did you really think your dominator act would get me to do whatever you want and be your plaything while you're out here in the country?"By this point her body was trembling and tears sprang in her eyes but her voice was- well- loud)
"You're not well, let me help you," He took her gently by the arm like gentlemen used to escort ladies in former days. He propelled her through the nearest doorway from the loo- which happened to be the ticket booth conveniently dark, empty and unlocked.
"How dare you…kidnap me- again! What are you trying to do?" Lizzy tried to screech this but the words came out as squeaks. Again she felt paralyzed. And weak. She had to sit down - she nearly missed the tall stool and he maddeningly was right there to steady her. Her mind, her stomach, continued to churn and war internally.
Lizzy had not drunk enough to warrant such a hangover… maybe it was the lack of sleep…food poisoning… her head was spinning with vague thoughts about her current state, what she really needed to be doing right now, why HE was here, what HE was planning to do…
"You look a little pale- sit down and drink some this."
Lizzy took a whiff and sure enough the scent of ginger and honey hit her nostrils and her stomach immediately calmed. She was tempted. She looked at him warily. He uncapped the lid and showed the contents- there were 2 tea bags with the familiar affirmation tags attached*.He proceeded to show Lizzy how full it was, take a drink, swallow in an obvious way, then show the inside with a visibly lower liquid level. He held out his hands in a sort of entreaty.
"See? Ginger. The only thing I added was some raw mesquite honey."
She grudgingly sipped, then gulped down what became an elixir, soothing its way down her throat. Ah, Licorice, Anise… mmmmm she was feeling better already.
"Now, do you want to tell me what's going on?"His voice and demeanor took on a kindly patronizing tone, like he was a teacher who caught his favorite pupil being naughty. The man had a penchant for superiority.
"This summer, you send officious correspondence, renouncing my choices, forcing me to make dozens of changes, researching them in the middle of nowhere. Yet you clearly expect me to respond expeditiously and berate me when I don't. Last night you were a little scary, quite frankly, the way you…"
Lizzy couldn't articulate the frightfully wondrous way he was "…the way you knew who I was but you didn't have the decency to have a real conversation about it. And then you call this town artistically remote. Finally you interrogated me in front of everyone today. Actually you interrogated all of us but Bingley. Do you do this all the time? Because whatever it is…."She gestured in a circle with the cup still in hand and run out of words.
"I told you it's only herbal tea and honey," his expression teasing. "I guess I should have given you chamomile- more calming."
"You know what I mean!"
"Well first of all, I wasn't briefed on the whereabouts or communication option of each production member so how was I to know? As for today, I was commenting on the arts complex's design as being artistically remote, which you'd have realized had you not been eavesdropping. Secondly, you and the rest are a professional as am I, and I was merely inquiring about details of interest to the production at the meeting. I already knew Bingley's work, hence the lack of questioning him. Maeve sent me some intriguing sketches of yours and I had ideas on how to integrate our designs, but you wouldn't hear me out! You kept interrupting because apparently you interpreted my questions as interrogations."
"Me? You were a bit overbearing. What was I supposed to do?"
He plowed through. "I admit, I heard about you, believe me, Charles said a lot, but not about the Bennet sister you presume. I heard about Jane from the time he started research on Longbourn until- well, frankly he hasn't stopped yet. He honestly didn't say where he learned about her. And they've only seen each other in person a couple of times. His only mention of Jane AND her sister is that they both sew. Suitably vague for one so besotted, don't you think?
How was I to know the E. Bennet on my Production Crew list was the very Lizzy standing before me, the one whose sister has enchanted my friend almost as much as you've done to me?…You must admit, Elizabeth is a common name, even in a town of 75, 000 people- plus the more than million people over in El Paso and Juarez and any other visiting artists would increase odds exponentially. Unlike Charles, I was a bit consumed with other matters and had no chance to do such thorough research on the cast and crew. An action I am beginning to regret more and more as this conversation continues."
Lizzy recovered a semblance of steadiness. "Again, you know what I mean- not just that. You KNOW, or so you said last night."
"Well of course I know about the woman who… never mind. When I said that, I had other references in mind. If you don't believe me about theatre you certainly won't believe me about matters of more consequence. I guess I thought it would be easier to talk to you." He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair in exasperation.
She gave him a piercing look. "What do you mean, easier? You're so patronizing."
His eyes grew hard for a moment, as if she triggered something at such an accusation. "That's not it at all. I really hoped when we met you would just know." As he spoke those words, a breeze blew past them and they heard distant chimes.
Lizzy supposed it was the door to the shop but Will knew otherwise, especially with that familiar copal scent. His eyes grew wide. He quickly straightened, tone pleasantly polite, and almost whispered, "I wish I could undo whatever it was that caused you to think ill…"
"I think you should stop talking now, my head's hurting. I'm so confused." She interrupted him, not wanting to know what he wanted to undo. Her feelings were frayed from want of his comfort, but she quickly pushed that wholly unacceptable feeling down and righted herself. "I really have to get back to the shop. Maeve is expecting me."
"Miss Bennet. I want you to know that regardless of what you think, I respect you- artistically, and as a person. I look forward to getting to know you better, and to our collaboration. I hate to have caused you pain. Believe me; I will make every effort to….."He didn't finish his sentence as he opened the door. At first he held it open but Lizzy remained in a daze, unresponsive. So he just nodded and left. She remained sitting on the stool and staring at the wall, unseeing.
Lizzy willed herself to maintain this posture. She couldn't afford to be distracted for her first mainstage show. Not even by him. As soon as she heard his steps fade, she crumpled. Somehow, Lizzy pushed through to the ladies room again, washed off her face with cold water, gathered herself, and returned to the shop. The show must go on, after all, and so must I.
It would be an understatement to say that Maeve gave Lizzy an earful. She filled her in on every last detail of the visiting artists. If she didn't know any better, Lizzy would say that Maeve was the one behind the Bennet sisters getting some action with 2 particular visiting artists, they way she talked them up. There was something in the words she didn't say.
Maeve thought Lizzy didn't see her place a chocolate on that sparkly shelf above her desk, but Lizzy did. Maeve even touched one of the photographs lightly, reverently, when she thought Lizzy was absorbed with abundant visual references from said visiting artists. Later, Lizzy went up to see the picture was a tintype of a dark woman with hauntingly familiar chocolate eyes. Lizzy felt stared at. It freaked her out so she hurried out of the shop.
*Valmont: imdb dot com /title/tt0098575/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1
Like Dangerous Liaisons but w/ COLIN FIRTH!
*Yogi www dot yogiproducts dot com /our-philosophy/our-story/
The tea has different inspirational statements on each tea tag