Expo '86

But if I move my place in line, I'll lose.
And I have waited; the anticipation's got me glued.
I am waiting for something to go wrong.
I am waiting for familiar resolve.

--

November 15, 2003

Greg loves getting out of the lab. He's not pressured by CSIs to have results done yesterday fifteen minutes after they bring them in, Hodges keeps out of his hair, and he gets to work with some of Las Vegas Crime Lab's finest. And really, when given the choice, how many sane people would choose Hodges over Nick or Sara or Catherine (or if they were lucky, all three)?

And, of course, Greg gets to train to become a CSI, which is kind of the entire point.

Since Grissom only lets him out when they have little use for DNA testing, Greg really doesn't get out much. And he really, really wants to tell Grissom off, but the suspicion that Grissom probably has some logic unknown to Greg, some reason he's not letting Greg out to the field more often keeps Greg from opening his mouth. Even when Nick tells him he should, and Greg takes Nick's advice to heart.

"You look happy to be here," a voice tunnels into his thoughts, amused. Greg looks up at Nick and smiles tiredly.

"I am, believe me. Hodges was terrible before I left. But it's so boring right now. I mean, until David gets here, we can't really do much except take pictures. Which we've already done."

Nick smiles, and Greg's grateful that it's the same smile he gave him before he left Greg's apartment last night, not one that automatically makes him feel like an idiot. "Sure, but half our job is observation, Greg. You spend free time putting together things, throwing together theories to fuel your investigation. The time you're wasting sitting there looking adorable and bored doesn't do much except make me wish we weren't in public right now."

Greg is pretty sure his blush permanently changes his skin color. Before he can respond with something witty, David rushes to the scene, smiling a sheepish smile and apologizing about being late.

David stays for an agonizing two hours, in which Greg makes thousands of mistakes that Nick calmly points out to him. Greg thinks he's holding back the teasing because they're kind of dating now, but the lack of ridicule in his words only makes Greg feel worse about the entire situation.

Nick seems to pick up on his bad mood as they're driving back to the crime lab. "Everybody makes mistakes, Greg,"

"Thirty. Thirty in two hours. If this keeps up I'm never going to be a CSI." Sensing that Nick's about to tell him off for being so self-loathing, he flashes a bright smile and says, "Don't worry; I'm not going to go home and cry myself to sleep because I'm terrible at my dream job."

"You're not terrible, you're a trainee. Trial and error, man, it's the only way to learn. Eventually you'll stop making those little mistakes because the process just becomes second nature to you."

Greg groans. "You're not going to launch into another one of your lectures, are you?" He tries to hide his smile, but fails.

"No. No, I'm not." Pulling up to a stoplight, he allows himself a few moments to stare at Greg. He deliberately stares back, determined not to be the first to look away. When a horn honks somewhere behind them, Nick averts his gaze. Greg doesn't even have time to feel victorious. "Come over. I'll make dinner."

Ignoring the voice in the back of his head telling him to decline and take things slow, Greg grins again and says, "Sure, yeah."

--

Greg's certain that he didn't spend very long in the shower, but when he gets out, Nick's hard at work finishing dinner. "If you would have waited fifteen minutes I would have helped out," he says as he enters the kitchen. "You didn't have to do all this yourself."

Nick just shrugs and waves Greg over to his spot next to the oven. "Nah, don't worry about it." He gives the pot of soup one last stir before setting the lid on top. "Almost done anyway."

"What'd you do, throw a bunch of cans together?"

Smiling, Nick shakes his head. "Last time my parents were here my mom froze a bunch of soup."

Greg eyes the pot warily. "Frozen soup?"

With a laugh, Nick pulls Greg to him, hooking his arms around his waist. "It tastes just like normal soup. It has a longer shelf life when it's frozen."

"…Frozen."

Greg hopes the small smile that lifts the corners of Nick's lips is in amusement, not the edge of frustration. "You're having a tough time with this, aren't you?"

"No, no, not at all," Greg lies, freeing one of his arms to lift the lid. It certainly looks like normal soup. "It's just a bit odd, that's all."

Nick's expression looks as though he's not certain he should be amused or disturbed. "Odd?"

Greg lets the conversation drop in favor of pressing his lips to Nick's. His free hand winds up, resting at Nick's neck and tugging him closer. Nick turns away as a light blush settles cross his cheekbones. Greg feels accomplished. "Come on, we'll ruin the soup."

"Screw the soup," Greg whispers, dipping his head to bite at Nick's neck. The light groan Nick makes only fuels Greg more, and he shoves Nick against the counter, still kissing and licking and biting.

There's times, like now, that Greg feels like it's a dream. A long, cruel dream that when he wakes up, he's going to hate life even more because it felt so real. But every night he goes to bed, he wakes up the next night with Nick next to him or calling him or something, or he goes to work and Nick pulls him away for a moment to tell him hello privately, and it's real. It's a bit much to handle sometimes.

"Greg…" The hint of need in Nick's tone makes Greg grin. He hears the loud click of the burner dial on the stove, and he looks up. "You win. Bedroom."

--

November 26, 2003

It takes a lot to piss Greg off. At least, he thinks it does. He's always able to find the silver lining in bad situations. When one of the CSI's gets angry at him for some reason and storms out of his lab, he thinks it's a good thing because he won't have to deal with their anger issues and they'll explode at someone else instead of him. He's normally very good at it.

But in just one shift, Nick Stokes has managed to single-handedly press all his buttons, flip all his switches, pluck his last nerve, and Greg is furious. He thinks Nick knows how angry he is, because Nick hasn't been by his lab in six hours.

To be honest, Greg's not even entirely sure why he's so angry. Nick didn't do anything that really bothers him; as a matter of fact, alone, all the things he did wouldn't bother Greg at all.

Maybe it's the added relationship. If Warrick was acting particularly pissed off, Greg wouldn't think anything of it, because he wouldn't have plans to go back to Warrick's and make out on the couch for half an hour, sleep in his bed and hold back his 'I love you's because it's too early. Maybe because that's exactly what he plans – or rather, planned if Nick's still in a bad mood by the end of shift – he's angry more because Greg's supposed to see Nick in his prime complaining and/or brooding time.

Of course, Greg really wouldn't care if he'd caught Warrick flirting with Jacqui's sub, either. He'd probably encourage it. Greg probably shouldn't be quite so angry about it, really. Because maybe he's putting too much into the relationship when he and Nick haven't really said anything about what they're doing or where they're going or anything, and maybe this is how Nick does relationships.

"Wonderful." Now he's going to have to talk to Nick.

"What's eating you?" Greg groans. The last person he needs to talk to about this is Hodges.

Greg slams the book he's paging through down onto the table, perhaps a little too hard. "I don't think you're really somebody I should be talking to about my problems."

Hodges leans against the door, casually almost. Greg knows better. "There's a psychologist here if you need somebody to talk to…"

"Thanks," Greg responds, fighting to not lash out at Hodges.

"…But they hardly know anything about real human feelings, so if you ever need somebody…"

"And you know about human feelings?"

The trace tech almost looks hurt. Greg considers apologizing. "Fine, fine. Don't talk to someone." He turns to leave, then stops. "I'll come see you when you're in a padded cell."

Greg considers it. Shift ends in half an hour, which means he doesn't really have that much time to pick and choose who he talks to. Besides, Sara's out sick, Jacqui's at a conference in Chicago, and Archie's not even visible over the pile of video tapes and computer hard drives he has to process through. He thinks that if he goes to Nick's before he talks this out, he'll explode. And he's already done that once this year, he's not too keen to do it again.

"Fine!" Greg calls. He tries to ignore the grin that spreads across Hodges' face. "But only because I'm desperate." He explains his dilemma without actually outing Nick or himself. Hodges listens with surprising maturity, nodding and 'mmhmm'ing at all the right times.

Finally, he says, "Okay. First, you really have to stop with the pronouns. If you really don't want to use a real name, make up a fake person. Second, graduate from high school and act like a mature adult in a mature relationship. And third, talk to Nick. All good relationships begin with communication. Or so they say."

Deciding not to comment on how Hodges knew it was Nick, Greg sighs. "You might have some empathy after all, Hodges."

Hodges smiles. "It's hardly empathy. After watching people for as long as I have, one learns about your kind of situation."

"Ahh, that's why I don't know anything about this. See, I'm always looking at you."

"You certainly know how to flatter a person. But I'm sure your boyfriend wouldn't approve of you flirting with other men."

As Greg watches Hodges leave, he thinks maybe he's not quite as terrible as Greg once thought. He just has a bad way of showing it.

--

November 27, 2003

As it turns out, Greg doesn't have to talk to Nick at the end of shift because Nick's sent into a triple homicide case and Grissom sends him and Warrick on a double because of Sara's absence. When Greg hears about it, from Hodges, of all people, he's that much more grateful that he sneaks out of the lab without running directly in to the one person he should want to run in to. Still, he leaves a post it in Nick's locker telling him he'll be waiting at his apartment when he gets off shift. He struggles to remember where Nick keeps his spare key, but can't. He scribbles on 'took your house key, too ;)' under his name and closes Nick's locker before Warrick enters.

Greg's close presence to Nick's locker gets a questioning look from Warrick, but his tense smile in response gets Warrick to drop it before it was an issue. "Be glad you're not a CSI yet, Greg," is all Warrick offers for conversation, and Greg laughs politely in response before bidding him good night and leaving.

It's a little comforting how relaxed Greg is at Nick's, especially because of all the pessimism he has stored up about everything else. After successfully opening Nick's front door, he throws his jacket over the edge of Nick's couch and kicks his shoes off at the doorway. He heads for the shower, trying not to think about much of anything.

He's asleep when Nick gets home, but wakes up when he hears Nick's keys clash against the dresser.

"Nick?" His paranoia about leaving the front door unlocked kicks in, and he can't see much of anything in the darkness caused by the blackout curtains.

"Sorry, baby. Figured you went home." Nick sounds tired, disappointed. Greg hopes neither are because of him.

"You got my note, then?"

"Yeah. You didn't have to leave the door unlocked, you know. I keep an extra key in my truck."

"Ah. I'll remember that for next time." Greg rubs at his eyes as he sits up, watching as Nick pulls off his shirt. "How'd the rest of shift go?"

Nick throws his shirt towards the bathroom. Greg feels more comfortable watching the shirt than he does watching Nick. "It was hell."

"You, uh..." Greg scratches awkwardly at his shoulder. The scars there pull a little. "Wanna talk about it?"

The pause is so long, Greg thinks he'd be out if he was lying down. Then, finally, Nick quietly says, "No. Not really."

Having remembered he's angry, Greg just nods curtly, though in the darkness, he's sure Nick can't see it. He falls back onto the bed, turns over, and stares at the wall until he hears the shower start. By the time Nick crawls into bed with him, he's asleep again.

--