Get Answers|Get the facts

10:58, Monday 14th, October 2013 - Grey-Sloan Memorial Hospital, Neurology Wing:

Something about the two best friends sneaking into the neurology department undetected had the girls giddy. They felt like ninjas. This wasn't the first time they had entered somewhere they shouldn't, just like old times.

And they were going to need to lean on that happiness. Big time.

Rachel followed her bluenette as they crept down the office hallway. As they passed, they skimmed the names on the doors. Finally, the wheelchair squeaked to a halt in front of an unassuming office front almost identical to the rest.

A section of wall rested between two concrete columns, divided into three parts. The center and right divisions were frosted glass, light filtering through. It illuminated a shadowy figure hunched over the desk. The left division was a tall, lightly stained wooden door with a small glass square centered in the upper half and a nameplate beneath it.

Dr Ryan Caulfield MD.

Head of Neurology and Neurosurgery

The blonde gave her friend's shoulder a reassuring squeeze, earning a determined nod in return.

So, she knocked.

"Come in!" came the hasty, yet indifferent reply.

Opening the door and stepping aside, she let the punk roll in first. Before they'd even completely crossed the threshold, they were met with distinct shock.

"Ch... Chloe?! What are you..."

The bluenette shut him down before he could finish his sentence with a single hand in the air. "I... I haven't forgiven you... I just... I need answers... I need to know what happened to Max," she replied, waiting for the blonde to take a seat beside the space her wheelchair occupied.

The model took a moment to examine the office space. On their side of the desk sat two chairs facing the desk, one she took and the other just opposite Chloe. Beige tiles covered the floor, same as in the hallway. Bookshelves were pushed against the wall near the door, filled to overcapacity. Either side of the window on the adjacent wall were Ryan's degrees, certifications and letters he'd received from grateful patients or parents.

His desk was cluttered with papers and trinkets - stress balls with heavy signs of use, a lamp, his laptop, a tablet with a stylus and a few picture frames. One showed him and a familiar short brunette at the Space Needle, taken a few years back now.

Out of everything she could see, what struck the blonde most was on the wall to her right. From maybe two feet from the floor to roughly the same distance from the ceiling was a veritable collage of polaroids.

Hundreds.

All organized into neat and orderly columns and rows across the entire width of the room. Ranging in subject - from landscape to family photos to nature shots of deers and squirrels. The closer to the center, the more pictures became selfies… focused on Max, her family and a particular long-haired blonde girl with features all too familiar. More carefree than Rachel had ever witnessed.

Chloe.

Sitting, framed above the center of the picture collage - like a morbid reminder - was a framed newspaper article, one that made Rachel's heart drop into her stomach. As if on cue, Ryan stood up and walked to the wall, plucking the framed item off of the wall and taking it with him as he went to sit down.

The bearded man himself looked rough, as though he'd seen much better days. And perhaps that had to do with having seen Chloe again after all these years, knowing that things had gone so horribly wrong.

"I... I don't think I can start on my own, so I'm going to hand you this..." he mumbled, shakily passing the frame across the desk.

He handed it to the bluenette, who took the item cautiously as if it would harm her with the slightest provocation. How apt that thought seemed. The punk turned the frame around, reasonably confused as to what a news article could possibly hold, and she looked at the title.

Teenage daughter of Grey-Sloan Neurosurgeon killed in tragic car accident

Chloe's throat visibly tightened, and her grip on the frame became stronger as she prepared to read through the article itself. However, before she could even do so, her eyes searched for a date, something to use to stay mad at the bearded man in front of her.

What she found destroyed the last hope she'd had of hating him.

April 26, 2013

"No… no, no, no… please…"

A single sob erupted from her chest before she handed the article to her blonde friend. The shorter girl read over the two items, instantly understanding the implications. April… the month their worlds had gone to shit… not only that but the article had been published two days after the day the world had broken. The hollow feeling in Chloe's heart grew tenfold.

The sullen voice from across the desk filtered through the shock. "She… died due to complications from the crash. Only been driving around six months. Didn't know how to handle the roads as well as she should've. Emotional, too."

His voice faltered, threatening to cut out. It took a long moment to compose himself, eyes shifting from watery to distant in a heartbeat. Both girls knew that look; he was reliving the memory.

"We didn't even know she'd left until… we found a very different newspaper on the kitchen table. The headline of that newspaper was about two young women had been rescued from a kidnapping compound in Arcadia Bay." He looked at the bluenette properly for the first time, defeated and apologetic. "One of them being you, Chloe..."

Everything started to make sense, why Chloe hadn't been told sooner. So many times, the punk had fondly reminisced about her first mate and best friend. The one person in this world she loved as much as Rachel.

The bluenette had even admitted - while incredibly intoxicated - that the first day she and Rachel hung out, had their first major fight at the junkyard, she had gone on a smash rampage. One item had been a camera. She had been able to tell the stand-ins for Rachel and David to go fuck themselves.

But the camera so deeply associated with Max…

The furious girl had been unable to even fathom the idea of telling her lifelong friend to go fuck herself, telling the camera to do do instead.

"She… cared about you, Chloe. So, so much. I want you to know that. She never gave up hope of seeing you again… one day. And, as best we know, that's why she… was headed to Arcadia that night.

Ryan - for all intents and purposes a man who should be broken even more so than Chloe was - forced himself to get out of his chair and walk around the desk. He came to kneel in front of the wheelchair, taking a steadying breath before his brown eyes looked up into pale blue ones. They no longer held the same steely quality as before, ignoring the truth. Now, they just looked sad.

"I... I understand if you hate me. I hate myself for not having read the article before she did. I hate myself every day for not forcing her to get in touch sooner. I hate myself so much for all of the chances we missed to go back to visit Arcadia Bay... But most of all, Chloe... I hate myself for having had to hide this from you..."

Her gaze remained locked with his, tears streaming down both their faces.

"When it... happened... I was so lost, but so determined to find a way to tell you. And then I had the phone in my hand, and I was going to call your mother… Then Vanessa put her hand on the phone and reminded me you were in hospital with a spinal injury that might never heal. Paralyzed from the waist down. People can only take so much loss at once. I… agreed."

Chloe - whose face was streaked with predictable tears - moved closer to the broken man. Cautiously, she opened her arms, suddenly pulling him closer. Her resolve, bitterness and anger all faded away with the realization that, in some small part, she had to accept the reason for Max's… she hadn't asked to be kidnapped or tortured, inspiring the brunette to come see her.

Once more, the blame fell squarely onto Jefferson and Nathan's shoulders...

19:12, Monday 14th, October 2013 - The Apartment:

Neither Rachel nor Chloe had spoken since getting back home. There was nothing to say. Not a single word worth uttering. Tears, yes. Plenty of those. Just when it seemed like they had no more to give. This was the cherry on the shit cake six months in the making.

Was there anything left for the universe to take from them? The answer: yes, but not much more. And the way things were going… they were set on the course to lose everything. Even each other.

That realization hit the bluenette harder than she had anticipated. The thought of losing Rachel after all this, of not being able to hear her laugh or watch the twinkle of mischief light up in her eyes when she was plotting... That didn't sit very well with her. Frankly, it made her sick. But there were other things that still stung even more freshly.

Morbidly, Chloe took hold of the bucket list that had been left on the kitchen table. She stared at their mutual, if differently worded, wish for so long… lost in the false hope.

Meet the elusive Max Caulfield|See Max again

Previously, it had seemed unlikely. Now… impossible.

Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed a pen. Similar to the ones she used to make her mark on the world in graffiti form. Lunging for it, she ripped the lid off and went to slam the nib into the paper. This list was a mistake.

Fucking stupid childish idea.

A curse.

Before the bluenette could aggressively scribble it out, Rachel grabbed her arm. "Wait… don't cross it off yet."

Chloe lifted her head, eyes conveying nothing but rage and overwhelming despair. That was enough to make the shorter girl's heart crumble. "Why? It's pointless. I'm never going to see her again. She's fucking dead Rachel!" The words hung in the still air, echoing. Much quieter and weaker this time, Chloe repeated her sentence. "She's… fucking dead… Rach."

All her hopes and dreams came crashing down around her once more at the cruel reminder. She had refrained from speaking it aloud for fear of having to accept it. Break her ideal reality into a million pieces. Max was supposed to be here. Just like the bluenette's father… she had left this world without saying goodbye.

Well, that might not be entirely true. Her eyes settled on the letter Ryan Caulfield had given them. Her name was emblazoned on the front in painfully familiar handwriting, with subtle differences. For a time, she had examined the three words on the front.

~To Chloe Price~

Under normal circumstances, they would be unimportant. A simple signal that the envelope's contents was for her eyes alone. Now, they made up one small fragment of the Max Caulfield she never knew.

Apparently, Ryan and Vanessa had come across it about a month ago when they had finally braved going into Max's room. It had been tucked between the pages of her journal, sealed. An unsent letter to her estranged best friend. Much like the letters Chloe had once written seemingly in vain.

If she had just… sent them. Even one...

Sighing, Rachel carefully lifted her punk's head. "There is a way."

Chloe's eyes registered confusion, then realization… "I… don't think I can."

"You are Chloe fucking Price. The badass. The girl who has constantly beaten the odds, brave and fearless. The girl I…" she faltered, almost scared to make her feelings known aloud for fear of pain and rejection, "...the girl I love with all my heart. I know you better than anyone at this point. You can do this."

Blue eyes were shocked momentarily at the confession, then registered overwhelming fear at the unspoken suggestion. "I… I can't do this. I'm not ready. I… I can't. Please, Rach… don't make me do this..."

"Will you ever be ready? If you don't do this now, you never will. And that's something you will regret for the…" the blonde paused, morbidly redacting the phrase 'rest of your life' given the potential shortness of it, "...you'll regret never doing it. I don't want you to give up on a chance of gaining some small amount of closure."

In the long moment of hesitation, Rachel carefully took hold of her punk friend's face and planted tender kisses. One for courage on the forehead. Two to take the pain away, absorbing salty tears. Three just… because she wanted to on the lips. The first took the bluenette by surprise. The second dried her tears somewhat. The third had her returning the affection.

When they finally broke apart, the blonde lightly bumped their foreheads together. This felt so wrong - like she was taking advantage - yet so right. "Just… think about it. That's all I ask."

Swallowing hard, Chloe did just that. Her reply came much sooner than anticipated. A singular subtle nod. Her response soft and quivering.

"Okay."

Author's Notes:
*Hey, just wanted to stop by and say thank you to everyone who's been reading and leaving feedback, to everyone who's following along as Rachel and Chloe stumble their way through the hell that life is throwing at them. I can only hope you'll stay with them through whatever may come. Cheers.*

-TjwCroft

*^ What he said. And it's gonna be one hell of a ride...*

-NYCP