She could replay the conversation coming up without even a pause. How many nights had she lie awake wishing she could go back and change things? And now she had her chance.

Peyton grasped the ring box tighter as she watched Lucas get off the bed and walk toward her. He smiled sweetly, kneeled before her and took her hand that held the ring box, in his.

He looked so young and innocent. She could see in his eyes that he was both excited and nervous to ask her to marry him, never imagining that she would tell him someday.

But not today, no on this day, this chance to get it right, she would shock him with a different answer.

"You don't have to say anything, Lucas," Peyton said as she extracted her hand from his. She smiled softly at him, opened the ring box, took out the ring she knew had been Keith's he gave to Karen, and placed it on her left ring finger. "The answer is yes, Lucas. Yes I will marry you."

"Peyton," he said softy as Lucas took her hand again.

"That is, if you were intending to ask me to marry you?" She knew he was, she just couldn't help teasing him.

"Wow, you know how to steal a guys thunder," Lucas said as he leaned in to kiss her deeply. He lifted his head and nuzzled his nose with hers. "But yes, I want to marry you, Peyton Sawyer."

He jumped up and raised his hands high and then placed them behind his head. "I am marrying Peyton Sawyer," he yelled to no one particular. And then he looked back at her, gazing at her perfect green eyes.

"Yes you are, Lucas Scott." Peyton rose from the chair to join him in the middle of the room. She took his hand and led him to the bed. "Now, why don't you give me a preview of what I have in store for the rest of my life?" Peyton smiled seductively.

"I can do that," Lucas promised and followed her to the bed.

It was late, or early, however you looked at it. Peyton glanced at the clock beside the bed and saw it read 3:30 a.m. She had shared an intimate and heart-stopping evening with Lucas. He made love to her tenderly, drinking in everything about her, and she did the same.

For Lucas, or this youthful version of him, he saw a future that spread out for years to come. For Peyton, the one that held the memories of an almost 24-year-old and not the 19-year-old that Lucas saw, she knew life held an expiration date that could be called in at any time.

Loss made her think about Lucas, and how she had lost him. But it surprised her even more to have her thoughts quickly turn to her daughter, Sawyer. Her daughter. The one she left behind.

Instead of thinking of the limitless future should could now have with Lucas, Peyton thought of the sweet baby she had held in her arms, kissed softly and walked away from.

The memories wouldn't leave her and as each one flashed before her eyes, it was like a dagger in her heart. The fear Peyton felt when she sat in the doctor's office listening to the list of possible ailments that could be causing her pain. The sigh of relief mixed with fear when the doctor called to tell her that it wasn't cancer or any other dire illness plaguing her, no, her life wasn't ending she was carrying one.

Then the hours Peyton sat in her office staring at the old photograph of herself as a baby and her birth mother Ellie holding her just hours after she was born. Peyton went over and over in her mind if she should call Lucas in L.A. with the news or wait for him to come home. This was huge, life-changing news, and she wanted to tell him now. She couldn't wait.

She had her speech all planned out. A bit of teasing and then she would tell him he was going to be a father. She opened with how she didn't think she could call him her fiancé anymore and as she was trying to say how she would have to call him her baby daddy, when she broke down. All the stress, the sorrow and then joy of the day just overflowed.

Lucas, being Lucas and knowing her so well, knew just what to say when Peyton began to blabber on about how soon it was, and how she was very, very okay with it. He had just told Peyton he loved her, and in that instance, she knew it was going go be okay.

Peyton carried with her the memory of him coming home from L.A. and handing her the single rose. How he lovingly asked how she was and then bent down to give her tummy, where their baby nestled a soft kiss of hello to their unborn child.

The time after was a blur of excitement, doctor's visits, a small wedding with friends and family, ultrasound photos, the look on Lucas' face when he felt their baby move inside her for the first time and the joy they had in fixing the nursery for their daughter. Lucas had strutted around the hospital room all smiles and full of himself the day Sawyer was born. The first time he held their baby daughter in his arms Peyton knew that little girl had him wrapped around her finger. He began calling Peyton and Sawyer his girls and he could only stand to be away from them for a few hours before telling friends or family that he had to get home to his girls.

Peyton turned her head to look at the youthful Lucas, as she began to think of him in her head, and produced a sad smile. He was not the Lucas she shared these memories with. It was as if he was a totally different person – and in so many ways he was and would be.

It was then she remembered the words of the young girl who had visited her and set these events in motion. How Peyton saying yes in this hotel room in L.A. would lead to her conceiving a child. She lay her had on her flat abdomen wondering if at this very moment a new life was forming inside her.

She should be happy, right? She would have it all. She would have Lucas, she would change the future and the past and she would have a child. But this child, that she was now certain was forming inside her, could not replace the baby daughter she had abandoned.

So many times in her life, people who didn't know the true Peyton, had called her selfish. Had claimed her actions were to her benefit alone, but Peyton knew that wasn't true. She had always tried to put others first, and in her heart, she knew her actions was selfless. But on this day, Peyton proved all those people right. She had selfishly taken away her daughter Sawyer's life in exchange for a new path for hers.

Peyton looked one last time at Lucas, slumbering peacefully beside her, and got up from the bed. She walked over to the window and looked out at the L.A. skyline.

"I can't do this," Peyton whispered. "I love Lucas with my whole heart, but I can't take away who Sawyer was supposed to be just so I can be happy. I could never live with myself."

"No, Peyton, don't say that." Peyton heard the young girl who had started this journey for her say. "Don't say that."

"I am sorry," Peyton said as she placed her hand on her abdomen. Wishing to go back, to not accept this life was taking away a chance for another daughter of hers not to live, but Peyton knew that she could only concern herself with the daughter she knew, Sawyer. Not the promise of a daughter that never was.

"I am sorry," Peyton said again. "Take me back, this isn't right."

A flash jolted Peyton and she closed her eyes. She felt dizzy and disoriented when she opened her eyes again, and felt relief and sadness when she saw her bedroom in the house Lucas and she shared. Looking over, Peyton saw Sawyer sleeping peacefully in the crib beside her bed.

Peyton walked over to the crib and stroked her baby daughter's fine hair. "Mommy is sorry," Peyton said softly. "But I am back now. You are back now."

"Hey babe," Peyton heard an all too familiar voice say. "I am heading out, do you still need me to pick up those diapers?"

Lucas Scott appeared in the doorway of their bedroom.

Peyton's eyes grew wide, she whispered his name, and then everything went black.